Straight-Love Rehab

[rareboy]

You first.

How is this supposed to help?

 

[G-Lexington]

I've never had a crush on a straight guy. I mean, yeah, I've fantasized about banging some guy from time to time who I knew was straight, but I never lusted after them post-orgasm.

Lex

 

[bokan800]

Okay there are numerous threads seeking advice for how to deal with "being in love with a straight guy". It's one thing if you've recently met and aren't yet sure about his orientation and just assume he's straight, it's another if he's had several girlfriends for the 5 years you've known him and you're still pining away like Seymore in Little Shop of Horrors. I personally don't understand the dynamic of loving someone of a different sexuality, but here's an open forum to seek support and comfort from your peers, especially those dealing with the same problem. So let's start by introducing yourselves

You know that's what homophobic people use as an excuse to dismiss homosexuality as well. The idea of loving the same sex seems impossible to them.

Gay, straight does it really matter. Love is love, however corny it may sound.

 

[nihilis]

i'm not blind enough to love somebody who defines themselves as straight, i did this half for fun and half out of hearing people wine about how long they should chase after their straight friend

Accusatory tone eh? What's the weather like up on that high horse there marley?

 

[G-Lexington]

So you started a thread to laugh at people's problems, and now are having issues because it's turned "negative and accusatory"?

Sorry if I'm a bit low on sympathy here.

Lex

 

[supergurl]

....................................

 

[LushPuppy]

Gay, straight does it really matter. Love is love, however corny it may sound.

AMEN!

 

[KaraBulut]

Sorry if I'm a bit low on sympathy here.

Dictionary. Under "S".

 

[rareboy]

did this half for fun and half out of hearing people wine (sic) about how long they should chase after their straight friend but this is obviously a failed thread

...and that is where you missed the point of this forum.....and the first post wasn't negative or accusatory; it was interrogative.

...if you think that guys' crushing on their straight friends for whatever reason is funny, then you should try this thread in Fun and Games.

and PS, there's no help for someone who loves the unattainable, i'm not God i can't restore sight to the blind

...and there is no need to be derisive or patronizing. For many of the guys who have found themselves 'crushing', the experience has led to, or increased their anxiety and/or depression and for some young guys who have posted, to thoughts of suicide.

When I was in first year university, I had a crush on one of my classmates. Been there, done that, got the T-shirt. It wasn't an enjoyable experience and affected my work, my sleep and my health. It fortunately ended at the conclusion of the first year as I made more friends and returned the next year more emotionally
mature and less 'needy'.

I would suggest that if you find the problems that people bring to this board cheap entertainment, then you probably are wasting your time here.

 

[nsguy2]

How can one be helped if the helper doesn't understand the "dynamic" of the situation?

What person chooses the person they fall in love with?

Of course people fall in love with their friends. The fact they may never have that love returned in the same way has little or nothing to do with it.

That applies to homo, hetero or anything in bewtween or on the fringes.

 

[rareboy]

So back to my original points.

You first.

...and how is this supposed to help?

While it may seem efficient to bundle all the problems of guys falling for their straight friends into an omni-bus thread, after a while, it is just so much noise.

It is much more helpful for posters to know that their particualr case, no matter how much it may share similarities with others, may invite comments appropriate to their particular situation.

It certainly doesn't invite participation when the creator of a thread says they don't understand the problem at all. It immediately creates the worng atmosphere for people to post about their problems. It doesn't help when it is reduced to asking people for their name...Why?????, their age....Why??? and to reduce everything to:

3. How long you've been lusting for that jock in the locker room who may or may not be casting eyes at you.

ending with.....

Remember, however silly we may think it is, this thread is about supporting our fellow JUBers

So please don't start trying to make it sound like you were attempting something grand and noble and are just being grievously treated by people too stupid to understand what you really meant.

Particularly when it is followed up with:

if zac efron wrote this thread these posters would be laughing along with him.

Which only invites the response of 'HUH????'

But you're right, there are still dozens to be heard from. Let's see if they give you the answers to the three questions you posed.

 

[nsguy2]

Okay there are numerous threads seeking advice for how to deal with "being in love with a straight guy".

Read through some of them and then maybe you'll be able to understand it a bit better.

 

[Lube]

I didn't take umbrage at your original post. Maybe a little misguided, but you don't strike me as someone innately evil or anything.

I think some of the folks in this thread should lighten up a bit.

 

[G-Lexington]

Oh, get off the cross, kid. It seems utterly clear to me that you were out to "have fun" with some people's problems (which I could perhaps go along with another section of this website, but certainly not here). And then when your post didn't have the expected response - "Yeah, another homo hoping to get plowed by the quarterback!" - you leap into victim mode. We're all uptight, don't have a sense of humor, don't realize how much you care and are trying to help, and are trying to be exclusive, and whatever else you'd like to say.

But I don't feel like playing any more. Feel free to kick this ball around some more if you'd like.

Lex

 

[JABEEE]

I'm in that situation now.

I feel like I fucked myself over and I saw it coming but I couldn't help it.

Now I'm sad miserable and down because he got a gf a month ago.
I feel pathetic saying so.

 

[Azeni5]

Im currently in this situation and its really getting to me. I'm like in love with a footballer player at school and he knows since i told him. He hasnt done anything to me personally to make me hate him. I never see him with a girl, he hasnt dated anyone and yet he's one of the hottest guys in school. There are times when he seems like one of the gayest people but on other side, the straightest guy. I dont know what to think and this has been going on for a good year and a half. He sometimes catches my eye in the hall but idk whether to think its cause hes gay or cause hes looking at the gay guy who likes him.

i wanna get over it but its so hard.

 

[rareboy]

You told him you have a huge crush.

He hasn't done anything about it.

Gay or not, he's just not chasing after you.

This should be all the incentive you need to move on. Just be friendly, but forget about the rest of it.

 

[RedRedKroovy]

ok here's my 2 cents. Since I am home today.

I had this happen to me. A guy I'd known for years came out and told me he was in love with me.

I'm straight. I'm not saying I haven't done some freaky things but I like girls.

Ok it freaked me the fuck out. I really hate it because I think I'd have been ok if he just told me he was gay. I have gay friends it's no big to me. The whole love thing just threw me.

We aren't freinds any more and that really sucks. He just should have kept his feelings to himself.

 

[RedRedKroovy]

^I was willing to remain freinds. He said it was too hard for him seeing me with my gf and all.

I wasn't mad at him at all..just shocked

 

[RedRedKroovy]

^ that's a good point I don't have a prob with gay guys I like mine they like theirs no big

what I do mind is just because I'm not a shithead about it that gay guys think they can do crap like what your saying

I can kid around with guys and stuff but there is a point that a line has to be drawn

There was this one guy that would be real flirty with me and I tolerated it because he was my gf's bff... so no big

He'd talk about my ass and my dick and how he'd like to do this and that I finally got fed up and told him to back off
he just wouldn't stop and he thought it was "cute" when I got pissed or embarrassed

My gf kept making excuses saying he didn't mean it and shit so instead of pounding his head in I dumped her

I have to admit it took me a while to get to the place I didn't want to knock the shit out of every gay guy I saw

I mean WTF was that?