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Straight Lover..

I can understand not wanting to like him. Like I said totally been there done that and after a marraige, two kids, a divorce, and all the other drama I had to go through I can honestly say now it was just not worth it. Don't get me wrong if your friend comes out as gay or bi thats cool but in my case he would tell me he thought he was bi (it took years before he would admit that) but he "couldn't risk hurting his family by coming out so he wanted to still have girlfriends eventually a wife and he and I would be the real relationship. He seemed to think I would be happy spending my life as the public best friend and the behind closed doors BF. The only time he expressed anything in public was if I was with another guy than he got jealous as hell.

I can't say for sure that your Rob will be the same way with you and in fact I hope he isn't but you should make sure you know for sure what you want out of a relationship with him (friendship, sexual, romantic) and what he wants... if you two aren't on the same page thats problem number 1 in my book.
 
i was into this post at the beginning because i thought the poster had a problem that needed some advice. now i think he just needs drama and will draw in anyone he can to support and feed it.

perhaps i am wrong and he needs some advice, which is this:

grow up. know who you are and what you want. period. if you don't know waht I mean, then you are doomed to continue this cycle - and ruin a great many friendships in the process.

You're gay. Your friend may or may not be. Stop being so selfish and pushing the issue. If he is indeed your best friend, then let things be. Have your love life and keep it out of his face...that does not mean keep it a secret, but that you should stop wagging it in his face. Fuck your tricks when he is not around. The games you're playing will not end well...you will lose teh best best friend that you think you have now.

If he is bisexual, then great for him....but we're back to my original point...know yourseld and what you want. Make it known. No drama. No bullshit. He will either handler it or he won't. The only way to do honest here is to be straight forward and cut out the immature games.

Perhaps I don't know the details even though the psoter is determind to play this out in public. What I do know is that no good friendship is ever based on games and bullshit and lasts beyond the kid -= like years of the late teens and early twenties.

Be honest. Know yourself. Know what you want. Don't play games.

Grow up.
 
I really hope that our friendship or what ever I have, last longer then you say. I can’t see my self with out Robby.
I like it when we’re being normal and just hang out or talking on the phone.
But if it’s not me thinking things it’s him doing things. I don’t want to mistake things or even make up things.
I know Robby loves me, and I am happy with that. Sometimes he dose get carried away and he pushes the limits.
Which then make me take a step back and say “what’s going on, why is he acting this way”? I have in the past miss
Read things in straight guys actions. However I know this is not the case now because I know my boy is some what fruity.
Like I said before when ever he’s ready to face the fact I’m there for him. He hasn’t had a girlfriend in a while.
I tell him the clock is ticking buddy!
.
As I Wright there are things that I pick up on or I think back on something he might have done.
That make me question him, and consider the level of love he has for me.
I enjoy the games…when ther games and we’re just messing around. But then there are the times I notice or feel him
Trying to fight what he feels when he does he seems to get aggressive and mad I want to help him.
I let him know all the time that I love him no matter what! And I’m hear for him when ever he’s ready.

I Know or I’d like to think I know who I am .
 
Me and Robby hung out today we went to the mall go get some summer stuff.
and we had a fight in the mall =( because ray called me and he wanted to hang out but i couldn't, and Robby thought i wanted to ditch him. i was like no no... However i did want to ditch him for someone else...
Yeah...BOy! I met this guy on sunday at a BBQ he is the friend of my cousins neaighbour. His 19 and out, a bit shorter than me and tan brown hair brown eye's cute italian boy. he has a very cute baby face and very sweet. honestly i first saw him I was like i wanna rape him... But i was like relax Lou RELAX...so I just go up to him start talking he ask'd me about my shirt i was like i made it and then we found out we're into art he was so sweet. we both had sidekicks i have the LX he has the slide he took mine and put his screen name on mine i did the same. so on the drive back we where talking LOL he was funny and cute!

SO...OK...I havent told anyone that i met him or that I'm talking to him.
I havent even told Robby. I dont want any drama i want to get to know him on my own and i dont want any people's opinions to affect me and my idea of him.
we went out on monday and yesterday. it was cool he so sweet very innocent.
hope it goes well?
 
You are one very lucky person and you have a very, very special friend. Appreciate him for who he is and how he respects and loves you. that is worth more than anything.
If he ever felt he had a need to talk to you about his/your sexuality (which I doubt from your first Post, it sounds like he's got his Shit together), he'll be the one to do the talking at his choosing.
Very very honoured that you have such a friend. They're a rare gem
 
Yesterday, I hung out with Joey (The guy i met at the BBQ last sunday) and Robbie.
I was very nervous, we went into manhattan. Robbie was a little rude to him at first but then saw he was nice and wormed up to him. Joey so innocent and so sweet. Rob bought us lunch at this cute restaurant in the village. then we took the train and hung out in central park the rest of the day. I told joey the situation with rob he seemed cool about it. and ray i dont know all he want to do is fuck no real emotion into it. so at night when we got home joey and rob really bonded because joey likes the ultimate fighter shit on spike tv. and they where yelling and hollering at each other so they really got along.

I really like joey he's cool and i really hope things work out so i havent done anything i just gave him a quick kiss on the lips yesterday night when he left.
he's like me that we want more then fucking we want to date someone and have a relationship. i really never seriously dated anyone, i have seen someone but it was more of like lets hang out for a bit say we're dating and fuck the rest of the time and i'll call you my boyfriend and they really never lasted long. I think the longest relationship i have is with rob LOL.

if i want to have a relationship and don't want it to be all about sex and i want him to respect me how long do you thing is a good enough time to wait to have sex? i dont want him to think that all i want is to have sex.
 
Yesterday i went to see rob and i walked into his room i saw he was on his computer it was obvious he was jerking off! but i was like what happened he got angry said why the fuck i didn't knock and stormed into the shower i checked and he was jerking off to gay porn! i mean i did not say anything but i closed out the window and like pretended i did not know anything? should i say something do i let him know i know?
do we talk about it or just let it be?
 
I've never responded to a post on here but this one really hit home with me. I also have a straight friend that I "hook" up with frequently and although I never let myself think about it, nor do I ever discuss it with him, I know I would love for the relationship to be a lot more. However, I went into this with my eyes wide open and it has proven to be the most fulfilling relationship I've ever had with another man. Here's the back story...I met this guy when he had just turned 18. I was 40 at the time. He is about 6',2''/185#/shaved head/green eyes/ just about the most perfect dude I'd ever laid eyes on. We both worked at the same plant and were introduced by his friend that worked for me. Chad and I became fast friends and I knew I was getting some kind of "vibe" from him so I casually mentioned to him that he could probably make a little money doing a solo video for one of the websites that I had "found" on line. He was immediately interested so I told him I'd be glad to film it for him and send it off to see what happened. We arranged for me to pick him up at the place where he was supposed to be attending GED classes and I rented a hotel room. That first time I did nothing but take polariods of him. That was a Tuesday, he had class again on Thursday so we did it again...this time, I went down on him and there was no doubt it was the best bj he had ever received. We started hooking up every Tuesday and Thursday and ocassionally other nights when his girlfriend had to work late. Its been 5 years now, he still has a girlfriend and I'm still seeing him at least once a week. He knows that I love him and I know he loves me but he is totally straight so this is as far as it can go, which is fine with me. Needless to say I do a lot more than just blow him now. I know his body better than he does and he loves it. Just like week he made 2 comments that I never expected to hear...1.) "I love it when you do this" as I sat next to him on the couch and stroked his cock through his shorts and 2.) "If I were gay, but I'm not, it would be me and you dude." That was the one that totally sent me over the edge. I've never had a relationship with another guy that I didn't have to worry about him hooking up with another dude..I know without a doubt that I am the ONLY man to ever have this guy and I will ALWAYS be the only man. Thats a damn good feeling. He can fuck all the chicks he wants, but I know I'm the only man he fucks. Some people might think I'm crazy, but I don't worry about that...I know in my heart he's all mine... Just wanted to share that with ya'll....
 
davidnga said:
I've never responded to a post on here but this one really hit home with me. I also have a straight friend that I "hook" up with frequently and although I never let myself think about it, nor do I ever discuss it with him, I know I would love for the relationship to be a lot more. However, I went into this with my eyes wide open and it has proven to be the most fulfilling relationship I've ever had with another man. Here's the back story...I met this guy when he had just turned 18. I was 40 at the time. He is about 6',2''/185#/shaved head/green eyes/ just about the most perfect dude I'd ever laid eyes on. We both worked at the same plant and were introduced by his friend that worked for me. Chad and I became fast friends and I knew I was getting some kind of "vibe" from him so I casually mentioned to him that he could probably make a little money doing a solo video for one of the websites that I had "found" on line. He was immediately interested so I told him I'd be glad to film it for him and send it off to see what happened. We arranged for me to pick him up at the place where he was supposed to be attending GED classes and I rented a hotel room. That first time I did nothing but take polariods of him. That was a Tuesday, he had class again on Thursday so we did it again...this time, I went down on him and there was no doubt it was the best bj he had ever received. We started hooking up every Tuesday and Thursday and ocassionally other nights when his girlfriend had to work late. Its been 5 years now, he still has a girlfriend and I'm still seeing him at least once a week. He knows that I love him and I know he loves me but he is totally straight so this is as far as it can go, which is fine with me. Needless to say I do a lot more than just blow him now. I know his body better than he does and he loves it. Just like week he made 2 comments that I never expected to hear...1.) "I love it when you do this" as I sat next to him on the couch and stroked his cock through his shorts and 2.) "If I were gay, but I'm not, it would be me and you dude." That was the one that totally sent me over the edge. I've never had a relationship with another guy that I didn't have to worry about him hooking up with another dude..I know without a doubt that I am the ONLY man to ever have this guy and I will ALWAYS be the only man. Thats a damn good feeling. He can fuck all the chicks he wants, but I know I'm the only man he fucks. Some people might think I'm crazy, but I don't worry about that...I know in my heart he's all mine... Just wanted to share that with ya'll....
Click to expand...

You know that he loves you, you have been hooking up with him for 5 years, and he is totally straight? Huh? Did I miss some information here?
 
It already sounds like he was annoyed that you didn't knock (rightfully so), so you gotta just let it be and not say anything.
 
well rob is really confusing i dont know if his being Jelouse or over protective.
I met this kid and rob has been on his case and he has been mean and rude to him. last week rob took me to his house in the pocanos and we did river rafting and walking in the woods and stuff like that. it was cool. i tryed to talk to him about his feeling and mine.
I told him that he has been acting diffrent and that i really tierd of just depending on him to give me affection, that his great and i love him to death but i want more and i cant date anyone cuz he always scares them a way. i told him i want someone to fuck me kiss. he laught at me was like what you wanna fuck for you can get shit i'll buy you a dildo! i'm like rob no i want a lover he said well you my wifey and no one gonna take you away from me. i was like see rob thats what i mean he just said "it is what it is leav it at that"? i asked then what is it? told him that it's ok and that i will always be ther for him he has to do what makes him happy and not do things for other people. and if he keeps hideing it's only gonne get worse becaus ething will get complicated. at that point he started crying and told me to just shut up i just told him his my best friend and i dont wanna lose you or things to change between us. he just kept quite and we fell asleep things again whent back to normal he keeps being a teas butthen at a party on thursday he was drinking and he let things get a little heatd and we kissed and he let me pull his shorts down and feel his but and he rubbed his cock on my leg and i jerked him off. and he has been ben wierd and it's been hard for me lil bit
 
Your life story is intriguing and hot.

...though I am sure it might be challenging at times. I can kind of relate - that you kinda hafta walk on egg shells when thinking of trying not to jeopardize your valuable friendship with Rob. On the one hand, you are blessed, but on the other hand, it sounds like he is trying to deal with and process his own feelings - Rob seems to walk on the 'wild side' only after drinking.

Hopefully, you can strike a balance to maintain your frienship while not putting your life on hold. If your friendship is stroong enough, it should be able to overcome anything. Just take it a day at a time and hopefully things might fall in place. Take care.
 
well last night rob called me he said he was lonely and sick that he had a big hang over! I go downstairs to see him and were in bed together watching south park, and he put his arm around me and i put my leg over his and i'm rubbing his hair and for the longest i see his hand down his pants and i go to feel and i feel his cock and its hard he just said that he was really horny and he didn't know why!
at that point i got really scared and very nervous but i give his dick a few tugs but i let go. and i felt like i was doing something wrong i had a bad feeling in my stomach the he grabbed my cock and gave me a few tugs but i pushed his hand off. then we just watched tv again the like an hour he was still rubbing his dick i grabbed him and jerked him off again and then he pulled his pants down said to get a condom because he wanted to fuck i said NO i cant he said come on i was like no please he said ok then we just jerked each other off and i just sucked his cock and he grabbed my ass and pulled the sheets of my head he moaned and said not to stop i told him to shut up and then he came in my mouth and i swallowed his cum then he laughed and said oh shit did i swallow? we spoke for a bit but i felt so wired and i started crying and i'm so confused i dont know if im happy or ashamed then this morning he text me said that he loved me but please not to tell anything that happened!
 
I have no clue what to feel what to think i just hope last night doesn't repeat i felt really bad doing it the where points where i lost interest i felt like i was doing something with my brother or jail bait. i was so interest with the whole situation. i mean i know this is what i wanted but if i wanted it why did if feel so wrong?
 
human sexuality isn't something that can be defined and is set in stone, you can't categorize every little feeling, saying today he seems a bit gay but today he's acting so straight, he's just who he is. it sounds like a beautiful friendship, I have a straight friend that sits on my lap sometimes, will smack my ass when I pass by, I've slept with one of them literally in the same bed several times, I don't think he's gay in the least bit, I ask him all the time is he sure just because some of the things he does is 'gay', but you can't put a label on every little action, I'm sure he's just playing around, anyways I'm happy for you!
 
Rob isn't being honest with himself or you with his feelings, and he needs to deal with it. Unfortunately, since you guys are so close, you need to deal with it also.

This is prob why it doesn't "feel right" -

1. He is borderline controlling whenever you have new friends

2. As good friends/brothers you have also crossed the boundary when it comes to physical intimacy

3. He isn't being honest with himself or you in his sexuality.

In essence, it is a catch-22 because you also don't want to jeopardize your valuable friendship while at the same time, you know he would get upset if you tried to withdraw. It is almost like he is stringing you along because you can't move on and hang out or go out with other people without having him be too concerned.

You are going to continue to feel like Rob is using you unless he can be honest with his feelings and/or commit to a romantic relationship with you. It's almost like being strung along.

I am not saying that he is mal-intentioned in any way or doing any of this maliciously. Rob seems to be acting out all of his feelings while being in denial at the same time - at your expense.

At some point, it might come to a time in which you have to be honest with each other. It's all fine and dandy if you are fine with it and accept it for the way it is, however, if it doesn't feel right to you, then your resentment is going to build until everything explodes.

Another question you have to ask yourself is if he ended up being ok with his feelings, would you ever imagine yourself in a romantic relationship with him?

If this isn't making you feel comfortable, at some point, you are going have to "unring that bell" which is usually hard to do.
 
last saturday me and rob went all the way. I fought my feeling and me and rob made love! then the next day my friend chris noticed the Hickys and put two and two because we where playing video games the night before and he knew it was only me and rob.
so i dont know he spoke to rob and rob officially came out to his friend and used the L word? he cry'd a lot and is feeling kind of down and scared because his an athlete so the situation has become a bit complex i told rob that he doesn't have to tell anyone he doesn't want to?honest with him self? i know it's hard comeing out but i feel he really has a hard time because his parents have really high expectaions for him his an athleat so they want like pro ball? his dad is an asshole and use to beat the shit out of rob and his dad still verbally abuses him? rob natrualy is a guy his genuinly masculin he not covering up or down low or trying to be someone his not. its not even about attraction anymore it's more about feelings and genuine love i have tryed being happy with other guys but not the same.
 
WOW. It sounds like a beautiful thing what you guys did - and Rob seems like a really special guy.

Just take things a day at a time.
 
Woohoo! Finally! I'm happy for you two. You have something really special. Keep us posted!
 
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