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Straight up, rough Sex... and it was...

Well, We talked today. I had to approach him because he was still a little upset. We haven't talked in 2 days. I told him what was on my mind and all, he listened without interrupting. Then I let him talk

We both agree that I have problems with people supporting me. But I came to a compromise (A kinda silly one when I think about it)... If it is a day of the week that ends in "day", he has the right to make me feel special. That was cute of him and I did laugh like a loser. haha

We are good now, I'm taking him to the movies tomorrow night, then imma spend the night at his house before I go to work. He also mentioned how I have a hard time expressing my feelings, and I told him that not only am I new to the dating scene, but I'm still a guy.. I have a hard time doing that..

A few questions I would like some answers to.

1) Is it ok if I don't like him taking care of me? (Lending money, driving me places, etc)

2) What the fuck is up with me and not being able to sleep with other people?

3) How can I include him "in my circle" more? (Like Techie70 suggested. )

4) His birthday is coming up. He was born 1 week before I was. He likes Video games, Magazines, his car, food and beer. What do I get him?


Those are all I have right now, I would REALLY appreciate some answers and/or comments. IF you could get other JUB members to contribute I'm honestly trying to make an effort to make this last for awhile, I just need a little guidance from more experienced, commited Straight/Bi or even gay people. Thanks. :-]
 
1) Is it ok if I don't like him taking care of me? (Lending money, driving me places, etc)

Yes, it's fine. A lot of people don't like to be taken cared of. And some people relish it. Eventually, you might trust him or someone enough to give in a little. What you don't want to do is fake it.

2) What the fuck is up with me and not being able to sleep with other people?

It takes time and practice to accommodate someone else when you are sleeping. Eventually, you'll be so exhausted that it doesn't matter.

3) How can I include him "in my circle" more? (Like Techie70 suggested. )

you've got a lot on your plate right now. Let it happen naturally. As you are invited to parties or events, just include him. You don't have a lot of spare time.

4) His birthday is coming up. He was born 1 week before I was. He likes Video games, Magazines, his car, food and beer. What do I get him?

One thing is to keep it somewhat low-key. Since you're birthday is a week later, you are in control of what expectations are. Just turn it around - if his birthday were the later one, and he popped an expensive gift on you, it would cause anxiety to you. Certainly a modest, but personal gift would be better. Something that brings attention to a shared event that you both enjoyed.
 
Red - don't put too much pressure on yourself to know how everything works. It comes with time and experience and you'll learn what works for you, where you're willing to compromise and where you are not. You're really doing great so far.

1) I do not generally like people taking care of me -I used to think everyone wanted something from me. The trick is knowing if it is genuine. If it is and you are in need there's nothing wrong with being driven places, lent money etc.

2)It takes me months to get to a a point where I can fall asleep in the same bed with someone. I love cuddling but when it comes to sleeping I prefer to sleep alone. But with time you should get used to it.

3)Include him naturally. I think the more you share about your day and what plans you may have opportunities that will present themselves.

4) Birthday gifts are hard and it seems like Zakk has made a instant connection emotionally to you. How about cooking him dinner and making it a romantic kind of night? I think that he would like that. Or get takeout if you can't cook like me. : )
 
2) What the fuck is up with me and not being able to sleep with other people?

I really dislike sleeping with other people. It's supposed to be sweet and romantic, but if I'm bed I'm tired and then someone draping themselves all over me just makes me cranky. Plus I miss my own bed and pillows.

But you suck it up, and gradually you learn to deal with it.
 
He's a lot happier. Though, I had a realization.. kinda funny though.

We got out of school early, so we came back home to play some video games (haha). We started playing the games and I remember him saying something like "Fuckk yeah, what now hoe?!" and I laughed.

Then as always, we were going to have sex, but... I fell asleep. I remember him coming towards my face, and the next thing I know, I'm waking up to him playing games still.

I've been hella busy and tired these past 5 months. I try to make the best of it, but sometimes I guess I can't handle it. I have amazing time-management skills. I'm not a really big procrastinator, but I have a shitload to do, daily.

He said he understood, and just let me go to sleep. Though I think I gave him blue balls. Ahah

I just think that's hilarious. I love sex, especially with him... but I fell asleep. Hahahaha

Oh well, maybe next time. I got called in for work tomorrow, so I'm going to bed a little early.
 
Well, We talked today. I had to approach him because he was still a little upset. We haven't talked in 2 days. I told him what was on my mind and all, he listened without interrupting. Then I let him talk

We both agree that I have problems with people supporting me. But I came to a compromise (A kinda silly one when I think about it)... If it is a day of the week that ends in "day", he has the right to make me feel special. That was cute of him and I did laugh like a loser. haha

We are good now, I'm taking him to the movies tomorrow night, then imma spend the night at his house before I go to work. He also mentioned how I have a hard time expressing my feelings, and I told him that not only am I new to the dating scene, but I'm still a guy.. I have a hard time doing that..

A few questions I would like some answers to.

1) Is it ok if I don't like him taking care of me? (Lending money, driving me places, etc)

2) What the fuck is up with me and not being able to sleep with other people?

3) How can I include him "in my circle" more? (Like Techie70 suggested. )

4) His birthday is coming up. He was born 1 week before I was. He likes Video games, Magazines, his car, food and beer. What do I get him?


Those are all I have right now, I would REALLY appreciate some answers and/or comments. IF you could get other JUB members to contribute I'm honestly trying to make an effort to make this last for awhile, I just need a little guidance from more experienced, commited Straight/Bi or even gay people. Thanks. :-]

the answer to number 4: Book a show for him with Kinky Kelly and the Sexy Stud.
 
3) I think you can deal with it naturally , no need special affords.

I'm so glad to hear that you and zak are happy again:)

Keep it up!
P.s: I'm suprised that he didn't r*** you while you were sleeping:) I'm playing.
For birthday, you can take him out for a dinner? Then movie?

Maybe shopping, then dinner, then sex? Lol ( shopping tires ppl out)

Maybe a dinner , a movie, then hanging out in his place.
 
I am late to this thread. I hope the story is still going on! I think it is common to have trouble sleeping with somebody else in the bed. I had the same problem with different boyfriends over the years. It takes practice. For me it got easier the longer I dated someone, usually over several months.
 
i'll tell you a little story. I lived in a bsement apt in Queens when i met the guy I was eventually gonna be engaged to. He's a touchy feely cuddly guy and Im not. But i wanted to be. First night he stays over, after sex, we're cuddling on the bed but when it comes to sleep I have him his comforter and i had my own and explained that i can't sleep when people are touching me. Too much body warmth and i can only sleep in cold. I wrap my comforter around me like a cocoon and im out. I find out later he was slightly offended since he expected us to sleep in each others arms. I wake up the next morning groggy and see a lump across the queen size bed from me. Not knowing what it is, i kick it really hard and the second my foot makes contact, i remember that i have company over. He wakes up annoyed, but we laugh about for years. we move in together and we sleep together, just not touching. Years go on and I'm getting to urge to sleep in his arms and we try it out. We manage an hour one night and a couple hours the next night. We never made it through the whole night in each others arms except for one night when i came home piss drunk. But then eventually we broke up.
So others have similar issues with co sleeping together. long answer to short question.
 
...i can't sleep when people are touching me. Too much body warmth and i can only sleep in cold.

I have the same problem but I've always found ways around it. With one guy, I was always sandwiched between him and his dog, so I slept on top of the covers. I also find that sleeping back to back keeps me from overheating and has the touchy-cuddling feeling that I love.
 
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