Subtle tests to see if someone's gay/interested?

[silpmn]

So I'm just wondering if you guys know of any really good tests you can do to find out if guys are gay or interested in you or whatever.

Like tonight, I was watching a movie at my friends' house and the one guy just turned 18 not long ago, he's hispanic, and he's super hot...he's a slim guy with amazing fashion sense, he's super creative (like draws and makes stuff amazingly). So anyway...I would never really want a relationship with him, and all our friends are mutual so that could never work even if I did want it.

So I'm not really interested in him in that way...but it's the type of situation where if we were ever for some reason alone and something happened, I'd love it haha.

But tonight I was sitting next to him and I dunno, like put my leg up against his pretty hard, and I was like shaking my leg and stuff nonchalantly. He started shaking his leg too.

So I dunno...sorry I'll get to the point lol. I'm basically just wondering if you guys know of any really good tests that are subtle like that...maybe ones that you have actually had success with. I just figured it would be helpful for me and for a lot of guys here who have hot "straight" friends and stuff.

 

[onetwothreefour]

Tell him you are friends with a girl named Dorothy, and ask if he too is friends with Dorothy.

If he has no idea what the hell you're talking about, he's straight. If he says that he too is friends with Dorothy, he's gay.

Also if that doesn't work, you can resort to handkerchief code, just beware any man with a brown handkerchief out his back pocket, and you'll be fine.

 

[youngnihilist]

See how he makes eye contact with you

 

[theplayerking]

Make sure sure he knows you're gay.

 

[silpmn]

@onetwo: Haha that's too straightforward. I'm looking for *subtle*. Also I have no idea what you're talking about with the handkerchiefs lol.

P.S. I had to google what being friends with dorothy meant lol.

@Young: What would you say the difference between a gay guy's eye contact and a straight guy's is?

 

[Simon25]

Have no idea what being friends with dorothy means and the handkerchief trick is a bad idea down here since everyone has one hanging out their back pocket and its not a code!

Just make sure he know's your gay and let things take their corse, sooner or later if he wants something to happen it will.

 

[LonelyFace]

Speaking from experience, there AREN'T any subtle ways or tests to confirm suspicions like that, so don't bother wasting your time. Trust me, it doesn't work. You'll only end up getting hurt.

The only real way to find out is to be honest. Tell him you like him, and ask if he likes you back. Don't take it too hard if he doesn't; someone better will come along someday.

 

[Willie Boy]

Tell him you are friends with a girl named Dorothy, and ask if he too is friends with Dorothy.

If he has no idea what the hell you're talking about, he's straight. If he says that he too is friends with Dorothy, he's gay.

Also if that doesn't work, you can resort to handkerchief code, just beware any man with a brown handkerchief out his back pocket, and you'll be fine.

And what if he really is friends with a girl named Dorothy and thinks the OP is talking about the same Dorothy? This test as far too "subtle" for its own good.

 

[954dude]

Speaking from experience, there AREN'T any subtle ways or tests to confirm suspicions like that, so don't bother wasting your time. Trust me, it doesn't work. You'll only end up getting hurt.

The only real way to find out is to be honest. Tell him you like him, and ask if he likes you back. Don't take it too hard if he doesn't; someone better will come along someday.

I agree. Honesty is the best policy. Be respectful about it.

 

[silpmn]

Sorry guys, maybe some people missed the point...which is my fault because I tend to ramble lol.

Basically I was just telling the story of how I thought of this thread.

I was just posting this because I'm sure if anyone knows of anything that it's something most guys here would be interested in.

So maybe completely forget about the part where I was talking about the guy...I'm not really interested in him, so that's not my "problem" or the purpose of this thread. Sorry!


But yeah, basically I'm just wondering if you guys know of something that basically a gay guy would do, but a straight guy never would...and I don't want smartass answers like "sex with a man" lol.

 

[kcramer5318]

"OOOOPS... I dropped my pen..." and then bend and snap! Kidding...

Usually you can sort of psychologically probe the guy... Works best is you both are drinking when you do this (or better still get him drinking and you pretend to be drinking)... You don't want him completely wasted though... Next pretend that you are slightly drunk... start saying stuff like "Man I am horny... I just want suck some cock..."
Then start "joking" about sucking him off and shit... If he doesn't move away and act completely grosses out, kept going... If he starts to respond negatively toward your advances, I'd back off... You set the situation up so you have two excuses ("I was drunk" and "I was just joking"). Remember you have to be alone for this to work...

If all else fails and things are still ambiguous (or if you are not out yet), try the drinking scenero described above (modified for your situation), but instead of trying to seduce him right off, ask if he wants to watch TV... turn the TV on and have straight porn playing that you "forgot to turn off"... Joke about the porn at first to get him confortable... then when he starts to feel/adjust himself, POUNCE! Start teasing him about getting a hard on... When he denies it, poke him in the dick... still joking... keep doing this repeatedly -- each time keep your hand in contact with his crotch slightly longer... When he stops pulling away, keep you hand there for several moments and ask, "Have you ever gotten head from a guy?"

If he says, "no" (which he will likely say even if he has), ask him, "you want to? I doesn't make you gay or anything..."

9 times out of 10 this worked for me in College... Good luck!!

 

[kcramer5318]

Sorry guys, maybe some people missed the point...which is my fault because I tend to ramble lol.

Basically I was just telling the story of how I thought of this thread.

I was just posting this because I'm sure if anyone knows of anything that it's something most guys here would be interested in.

So maybe completely forget about the part where I was talking about the guy...I'm not really interested in him, so that's not my "problem" or the purpose of this thread. Sorry!


But yeah, basically I'm just wondering if you guys know of something that basically a gay guy would do, but a straight guy never would...and I don't want smartass answers like "sex with a man" lol.

Whoops! Sorry, I should really read the entire thread before posting... ways to tell other than sex... I can always pick up the slightest homovibe... something in the eyes... Even if someone is "butch" another gay can usually tell... Otherwise, go through his DVD collection... Does he have the complete Judy Garland Show series on DVD? If so, you have a queer, dear... No seriously just talk to a guy and you can usually get a blip on your gaydar. It is an undefinable quality that straight people (even those with supposedly good gaydar) can not detect... It is instinctual... 95% of the time your instincts are correct... Almost guys that I've thought were gay (or at least had bi tendencies) and that other people thought were straight, turned out to be gay or bisexual several years later (or several days later in my dorm room anyway)...

 

[kcramer5318]

Basically, to summarize, you need to get him alone with you... Keep it comfortable and casual (with or without alcohol -- though alcohol is quicker and will add the need social lubricant)... You don't want to ambush him... So if you can him totally comfortable with you and start talking about really deep things, he might open up to you... Ask him stuff like, "Do you have a girlfriend?" or "What kind of girls do you like?" If he starts using the term "that person" instead of "girl", put one point on the gay column... Again it's all about the vibe... But like I said, I highly recommend getting him drunk and taking advantage of him

 

[partyanimal]

Ask his mother, they know, it doesn't matter how straight acting the dude is. Their gaydar is amazingly accurate.

 

[kcramer5318]

^^ Sometime mothers are in denial... Aunts and Uncles can usually tell though... Sibling can ALWAYS tell (my brother and sister were actually betting money on when I would come out)... While it is true that deep down parents know, they usually repress it. My mother probably always new, but she hoped it was a phase (at the time I was 16 when I told her)... Now (almost 10 years later) she has fully accepted me being gay and is supportive... none of the tolerant shit... anyway I am rambling

 

[kcramer5318]

ANOTHER METHOD: I also once seduced my best friend's dorm roomate (who was supposedly straight, but I questioned) using only the vibrate function on my cellphone... Again joking around at first and then moving in more seriously... until SNAPPPP you've landed yourself a bicurious/questioning guy...

 

[TKNAKED]

plan a day to hook up and have him come to your place, answer the door in just a towel and at some point let it drop.

 

[Wookie]

I have one of the worst gaydars of any gay guy. I pretty much have to see wrists flapping in the breeze to be sure. The only sure thing that pings on my gaydar is when you pass a guy, wait a few seconds and turn around to see if he's checking you out. Straight guys never do that unless you've got a third arm or something. A lot of straight guys can be physically "touchy" but that can be from a lifetime of wedgies, towel snapping and grabass in the lockerroom. Either you have a good gaydar, you ask, or go for it and see.

 

[Flexuality]

Figuring out whether a guy is gay, and figuring out whether a guy might be interested in fooling around with you, are really two different questions. I suggest that you assume that he's not gay, keeping in mind that lots of "straight" guys will experiment. Touching each other's legs is a good sign. Making eye contact is good, though maybe more useful with strangers than with a friend. Kcramer had some good suggestions about where to take the conversation. It's kind of a dance where you take the chance of revealing yourself and hope to get something similar in return.

Speaking of tests, I've created a Flexuality Test that produces a sexual profile keyed to one of 12 sexual types and a scale of sexual "flexibility." The assumption is that most people are not entirely gay or straight. Just taking the test might open up the discussion, regardless of the answers. Unfortunately I'm not allowed to post the link yet.

 

[JNewYork]

If only we knew the answer to that.

You can find out if there's some interest (let him catch you looking at his cock for a second; a second is short enough to get yourself out of any gay accusation if he's turned off and a second is long enough to get him interested if he is turned on). Then wait to see how he responds to that. Pretty soon you may catch him looking at YOUR dick for a second and pretty soon you know he's interested.

BUT, and this one major BUT... just because a man seems to be showing interest does not mean he will act on it. Repressed guys can't act on it fully so they do the next best thing which is going through the motions and flirting.

I learned the hard way.

So if you want a really hot guy, look for him in a personal ad online or at a gay bar. Any other scenario is extremely hot but it has a lot of potential for heartache. Been there. Done that.