Swellegant - Archived Blog Post

[Swellegant]

Okay, something's been bugging the hell out of me the last couple of days, and though I have been trying to practice positivity and ignore things that make me angry, I have to get this off my chest.

Why, when people are drawing out a word, do they repeat the silent letter instead of the sounded letter? In several different threads the last few days, I have heard people loveeeeeee or hateeeeee several different things. Why is that? It should be looooooooove or haaaaaaate. I mean, say it out loud, which vowel sound is drawn out? The silent one at the end or the sounded one in the middle?

Or is it the new trend to add an ee sound to the end of words rather than drawing out the central vowel sound? That's always a possibility.

OK, so that's off my chest. The perpetrators of the foul crime will never see this, so it's as pointless as pointless can be. But then, aren't most rants?

I'm home sick, that's why I have so much time to peruse the boards lately; I've been deeply depressed for the last couple of weeks, and it culminated in a nice strength-sapping flu that's kept me pretty much in bed for the last three days (when I wasn't sitting here hateeeeeing functional illiteracy or sitting on the toilet reading the same Readers Digest that's been sitting there for two months).

My last nap seems to have cleared things up a bit, though, I'm feeling a lot better. I think, since I have the time off work already, that I'll get dressed and run a few errands. Toodle-pip!

 

[Swellegant]

I got laid off from my job. New budget restraints have forced them to reevaluate nonessential positions, and mine was about as nonessential as it could get, so I and my position got the axe.

Now what do I do?

Yeah, I know...start looking for a new one, right away before I blow through all of my savings and severance pay...but I just don't want to. I don't want to meet new people, I don't want to learn new routes, I don't want to do more interviews. I've barely recovered from the last bout, it was only a year ago.

I'm really going to miss my company...though I hated the job I was doing, I really loved the people I worked with, and I really loved the office. I felt very much at home there.

But now my elephants are in a big box in my car, along with my silk plants and my planners and my bits and bobs of souvenirs. It's very depressing.

Oh well. Life goes on. In the meantime, I have more time to spend here at JUB. And more time to spend cleaning my room, and working on my novel, and running errands for the Grandmother. Every cloud has a silver lining, I guess.

 

[Swellegant]

So it is now week six of my unemployment... and I'm still rather enjoying myself. It's delicious to not have to wake up in the morning, delightful to watch TV as late as I like, divine to spend the day in gym shorts on the couch.

However, I am starting to miss having any structure in my life. The hours trickle by without any feature, and I am starting to find it difficult to remember what day it is. I was quite shocked to realize that today is Saturday...if I'd ventured a guess, I would have said Thursday. Wherever did this last week go?

I keep intending to institute some structure into my days...getting up at the same time, going to the gym in the late morning or early afternoon, spending X-amount of time on the job search and y-amount on my novel. But instead I just sleep in, read in bed most of the morning, and spend the evenings in front of the TV. Very pleasant, very relaxing, but not very productive.

Ah, well, better than a rap on the head with a sharp stone, as my Daddy always says.

 

[Swellegant]

Not wishing-wells...

So I had a second interview today for a job I really want at a non-profit agency in Berkeley... and while I won't exactly say I bombed, I did come out of there feeling somewhat less than 100% confident in my interview. The first interview went like a breeze, but this one revealed some of my weaknesses, like my general inability to ask questions or develop long-term goals. But we laughed a lot, and on most of the questions they nodded knowingly as if I had said exactly the right thing.

But I'm feeling anxious, anyway. So please wish me luck; send your positive vibes my way; if you pray, say a little one for me. And if you happen to have an "in" with any supernatural powers, let them know that I am both worthy and deserving.

Thanks!

 

[Swellegant]

CHICKEN BUTT!!

This moment of complete infantilism brought to you by L'Ennui® Brand Boredom. I seriously need to get out of this room.

SRSLY!

I mean, I've spent pretty much the last ten days in here, alternating between the bed and the desk. I haven't even been watching TV. I've done a lot of reading, and watched a few movies in bed, and I went out on Saturday to run errands... but other than that, I've been here, waiting for the damned phone to ring.

The job I want at the nonprofit has not yet happened. My friend who works there has reported to me that he's sure I'm going to be hired, judging by remarks he's overheard from the people in charge; however, they have as yet neglected to tell me anything, either yea or nay. And it's driving me nuts. NUTZ I tellya!

The recovery time for my oral surgery has been a factor here. I mean, the painkillers were seriously fucking up my ability to function properly, and even though I stopped taking them after four days, they seem to be taking their sweet time completely exiting my system. And of course I was supposed to take it easy, at least until the stitches came out, which happened five days later. But after five days of enforced inactivity, I'm finding it very difficult to enforce any activity. I have shit to do, places to go, and all kinds of ideas... but all I want to do is go back to bed.

Well, I'm going to get up now. I have to run down to the pharmacy for the Grandmother, she's out of hydrochlorothyazide. First a shower and some fresh clothes. And while I'm out, I think I'll... oh, hell, I don't know what. Maybe I'll stop at the gym or go for a walk or something to get my blood moving.

Toodles!

 

[Swellegant]

I got the job! I got the job! I got the job!

YAY!

So, as stated in the previous post, I've been waiting on tenterhooks to hear about this job I want at a non-profit agency which helps people get on their feet with job placement and housing assistance. And today, I got it! I'm thrilled and relieved. I'm dazzled and delighted! I'm choking on my own spit!

The best part: the reason they delayed in offering me the job is because they were getting permission from the Board of Directors to offer me a higher starting salary than was listed! SCREEEE!

So I start on Wednesday, which gives me five days to get my shit together, get my wardrobe squared away, and finish off all the little projects I've been meaning to do since I've been unemployed. It's going to be a busy few days.

And I couldn't be happier!

 

[Swellegant]

...it's off to work I go!

So I just got back from my first day at my new job, and I had such a great time! Granted, I'm not doing anything very exciting yet... I don't have access to the database just yet, so I'm spending my time sorting and filing the mountain of paperwork that has accrued since my position has been empty.

But all the people I met today were so nice, so positive and cheerful. Even the few clients I dealt with today were fairly pleasant.

One of the best things I learned today is that my boss is older than me! I thought that, for the first time in my life, I was going to have a boss who was younger than me... but we were talking about birthday cards, and I said that since my last birthday was my 40th, all of my birthday cards were of the teasing variety... to which she responded that her fortieth, last year, was the same. She doesn't look a day over thirty, so I was rather surprised.

Anyway, more news as it becomes available; right now, I need to take a short nap. After three and a half months of not working, my body isn't used to this eight-hours-at-a-time bullshit anymore, and it's going to take some adjustment.

Kisses!

 

[Swellegant]

My employer-paid medical benefits kicked in this month, so I made an appointment with the same GP I had when I was a Kaiser member before, just for a general checkup. Kaiser Permanente has made a few improvements to the way they make appointments, by the way, and I got an appointment two days later (last time I had to wait five weeks). Well, anyway, I got to the appointment on time, with a list of questions to ask (fatigue, gas, and arthritis), mentally prepared for all sorts of indignities like partial nudity and/or a prostate exam (which one would think I'd enjoy, but noooooooo).

So there I am sitting on the paper-lined bench, reading an ancient copy of Runner's World (the only magazines in the office), and in comes the doctor... and my jaw hit the floor!

Now, I chose my doctor partly for his looks in the first place (I'm shallow like that), and I've met with him before, so I knew he was good-looking and had a sexy foreign accent; but he had heretofore always worn a white lab-coat and a tie and generally looked like a doctor. But this time he was wearing tight navy blue slacks and a charcoal-and-navy ringer-tee on his SERIOUSLY ROCKIN' BODY.

I don't know what he's been doing with himself during the twenty months since I last saw him, but he was effing hot. The man is in his mid-fifties, maybe even early-sixties, but the chiseled pecs, tiny waist, and bounce-a-quarter-off-it butt (not to mention the shiny gold hair, glowing bronzed skin, and glittering clear blue eyes) were what one might expect on a twenty-year-old. I was so dazzled and stunned that I quite forgot to ask about the fatigue and the gas (though he did refer me to an osteopath about the joint pain).

Something tells me that I'm going to get sick a lot in the near future.

Actually, I am healthier than I was when last I saw him... my blood-pressure has returned to normal (it was slightly high last time), my circulation is good, and though my triglycerides are still through the roof, my cholesterol is great. He wants me to lose some weight and get into a cardio exercise program at least three days a week to get those triglycerides under control. But for my age and weight, I'm in pretty good condition.

And I didn't have to take off my clothes, nor submit to a prostate exam (though I must say I was a trifle disappointed, seeing as how thoroughly I cleaned up for possible inspection).

Well, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go think dirty thoughts about Dr. McDaddy. In the meantime, you can think dirty thoughts about Dr. McDreamy.

​

No, you can't think dirty thoughts about Dr. McDaddy. He's MINE, betch!

 

[Swellegant]

(Note: I already posted these in the "Post Current Pictures of You" thread, but I wanted to put them in my blog as well so the series doesn't get lost in the shuffle; and while I'm at it, I can expand the text).

I did a show tonight (Royal Grand Ducal Council's Annual Winter Extravaganza, at the Bench & Bar in Oakland), and had the brilliant idea of photographing my progress as I got into face. The series came out fairly well, so I thought I'd share it with you!

​

Step One: start with a clean, well-moisturized, close-shaved face. I recommend MAC shaving cream for the best shave... that stuff can't be beat. I also used Preparation H on my face earlier in the day, it tightens everything up nicely.

Step Two: I like to lay down a good matte foundation, a blank canvas as it were; I used Max Factor Pan-Stik (Fair/Pale) and l'Oreal mineral loose powder (Translucent), though since Max Factor has stopped making the Fair color, I think I might have to go back to Dermablend (which costs a LOT more but comes in a zillion colors).

Step Three: I tried something new with my eyeshadow, going for a smokey look that I hoped would distract from my wrinkles; I don't know what brands I was using, but they're loose powders and very good quality; I put the darkest brown in the crease of my lids, with a lighter rosy brown on the lids and under the eye, and a shimmering taupe under the brow.

Step Four: I like a blackest black liquid pen eyeliner for the upper line, I'm using Almay because I'm wearing contacts but ordinarily I don't care about the brand; the lower line and the eyebrow is brown/black pencil (the cheap kind...eye and lip pencils are not worth spending money on); I used Maybelline (I think) for the mascara, it's one of those two-coat types that really thicken the lash. I always put a little dot of liquid eyeliner on the apple of my right cheek, a little trademark I've been doing for years... the first time was to camouflage a zit, but it really balances my face so I adopted it permanently.

Step Five: contouring is one of the most important steps in feminizing a face; I use a brownish-rose blusher for this, outlining my face, outlining the bridge of the nose, diminishing my jawbone and browbone, and adding a false shadow under the lip. The lipliner is a pencil, also the cheapest brand from the drugstore, I swear the expensive pencils fall apart immediately, I've never got more than one use out of them.

Step Six: the frame of the hair makes such a difference to the face, I like to put my wig on before I finish my makeup to see if I need to make any alterations or additions before I finish up.

Step Seven: a fresh coat of pressed powder and a coat of lipstick finish the face; the clothes (black ballet tights, black boots, strapless longline bra, beaded corset, brown silk suit with fox collar and cuffs) and jewelry are my favorite part of drag, what I got involved in it for in the first place. I can't quite explain the oddly dissipated expression I'm wearing in this picture, it makes me look drunk. I got a lot of compliments on that pendant, it's actually a snowflake Christmas ornament that I got at Pottery Barn!

The finished product. I felt so pretty in this outfit, and it was really quite comfortable. The boots got on my nerves after a while, as did the underwires in the bra, but it was very slimming without being terribly constrictive.

 

[Swellegant]

Hello, JUB Friends!

I recently completed the 2010 NaNoWriMo competition, writing a complete novel of (well over) fifty thousand words in thirty days. I am extremely pleased with the result of my efforts, and would really appreciate some feedback from others to see where I can improve it -- if it's even worth improving, or is just a smear of crud that only its author could love.

So if you have a few hours of idle reading time at your disposal, and would like to peruse a sexy gay murder-mystery, then go have a gander at:



Thank you!