Tell us why you would or would not go out with this escort

[luckynumbah7]

I don't know, there's a clear demand for "straight" men and what else would they be doing?

Same thing women do in straight porn - pretend no interest, move on to 'hard to get' then pretend you've been 'turned', your partner is so flattering/hot/good in bed. What makes it popular is that people usually loath rejection in sexual escapades and they want the ability to have their imagination backed by 'concrete' evidence that the object of their affections will like them - one way or another. Not that difficult, really. It helps when the other person wants to pretend you're actually straight.

Ever heard someone described as a cold fish in bed? Same thing as lieing back and thinking of England- no enthusiasm or any possible sign of enjoyment whatsoever.

 

[Elwood]

I have used the service of escorts, I have no problem with it. I am currently seeing a trans FTM escort who I have actually fallen in love with. We have been seeing each other for six months now. I enjoy his company tremendously, and he enjoys mine, not to mention the sex is out of this world and very passionate. We also hang out together go see movies (he pays one time and I pay the next time), watch TV shows together, cook meals together we have even gone clothes shopping together lol.

I pay him for the sex but not the other stuff, we cuddle when watching TV and sometime we just lie in bed laughing and talking after sex for hours. I consider him a friend and I look at it as I am helping him out. I have tried to stop seeing him twice now, but have become completely miserable and miss him terribly when I don't see him. I realize it is probably not the healthiest relationship, but it makes me extremely happy when I am with him and for the moment and that works for me. We even celebrated our 6 month anniversary together and he bought me a present.

I am not ashamed about it at all. My good friends know about him. I am not going to lie and tell you they are ok with it, but like I said he makes me soooo happy I don't care.

 

[luckynumbah7]

@Elwood,

If he didn't enjoy your company he wouldn't hang around -it isn't like sex work is terribly saturated with trans people as a whole. Although most people try and avoid the Falling in Love bit for practical reasons, if nothing else.

 

[TheLoveableLoner]

No, thankfully i don't have to pay for it

I find your choice of words interesting. In the other thread, you seemed annoyed with the amount of commenters claiming they don't use Viagra because they don't "need" it.

Yet here, you use the same mentality to dismiss using escorts. Couldn't both be considered sexually adventurous?

Basically it's about your money trying to prop up your ego. At the end of the day, once he's left, you're still alone. And both of you know that.

That's just so very sad.

Exactly. The "pretend to be into you" line irked me. I don't bed and escort to pretend to be into me, I need him to take orders.

 

[luckynumbah7]

I find your choice of words interesting. In the other thread, you seemed annoyed with the amount of commenters claiming they don't use Viagra because they don't "need" it.

Yet here, you use the same mentality to dismiss using escorts. Couldn't both be considered sexually adventurous?




Exactly. The "pretend to be into you" line irked me. I don't bed and escort to pretend to be into me, I need him to take orders.

I thought pretending to be into you is ....well, pretending to be into you like if you're eyes met across a crowded room and you've fallen in love, not just enjoying company of a stranger, being pleasant and/ or liking the person. I mean, the op already mentioned pleasant which covers general demeanor and agreeing on actions/taking orders. Only thing left is acting love. While quite a few men hire someone because they want company actually pretending head-over-heals is rare, I think. I've never done it, anyway, and haven't heard of anyone who has. Haven't seen ads for it, either. Strain credulity and guess who doesn't get a call back because they're considered an overracting ham.

Or is this one of those things where people just assume sex work usually mirrors a dating relationship? I'm having a suspicion there's a gap here. What are people defining as 'into you' vs 'pleasant and willing'. Because, ime, they're not the same thing.

 

[Soilwork]

No. I would only have sex with someone who wanted to have sex with me and we'd do it because we wanted to. Not because there was money exchanged.

I give money to the guy who delivers my Pizza and does my dry cleaning. Not the guy who I shag.

 

[Elwood]

@Elwood,

If he didn't enjoy your company he wouldn't hang around -it isn't like sex work is terribly saturated with trans people as a whole. Although most people try and avoid the Falling in Love bit for practical reasons, if nothing else.

Oh believe me, I wish I could have avoided the falling in love part. lol There was just something very special about him, from the moment we met! I am always joking with him, asking him "Would you ever have thought we would still be seeing each other 6 months later?" and of course the answer is no. I mean even on my behalf I never would have thought I would have the feelings for him that I do and I would be seeing him on a regular basis. I am not naive either, I mean we discuss our feelings quite a bit. He knows I love him and I know he is not in love with me but he does like me and spending time with me, and when we spend time together we have a lot of fun and it makes me very happy. And it some weird way I guess I am ok with that.

Exactly. The "pretend to be into you" line irked me. I don't bed and escort to pretend to be into me, I need him to take orders.

I thought pretending to be into you is ....well, pretending to be into you like if you're eyes met across a crowded room and you've fallen in love, not just enjoying company of a stranger, being pleasant and/ or liking the person. I mean, the op already mentioned pleasant which covers general demeanor and agreeing on actions/taking orders. Only thing left is acting love. While quite a few men hire someone because they want company actually pretending head-over-heals is rare, I think. I've never done it, anyway, and haven't heard of anyone who has. Haven't seen ads for it, either. Strain credulity and guess who doesn't get a call back because they're considered an overracting ham.

Or is this one of those things where people just assume sex work usually mirrors a dating relationship? I'm having a suspicion there's a gap here. What are people defining as 'into you' vs 'pleasant and willing'. Because, ime, they're not the same thing.

Now here is where I may be naive, see because I have a hard time understanding how anyone can fake good sex. In order for there to be good sex I believe you have to be into the person you are having sex with. Now having said that, I have had some pretty amazing sex with escorts, I would even say that with my current one, it is the best sex I have ever had. For me good sex is when the other person is getting pleasure out of it as well, which in my mind you would have to be into the other person, no? Does this make any sense?

 

[luckynumbah7]

There's a difference between being pleasant & willing, being unpleasant and willing, and just trying to fake good sex. None of those, to me, mean 'being into' someone. Most people have done the latter, if only to get something over with and spare feelings. I don't understand what you mean by 'into you'. Is it 'do you like what you know about a person so far', is it 'sexually crompatible', is it a 'generally pleasant first meeting' or what? To me, good sex comes from either some type of emotional or physical compatibility or, and I'm probably unusual in this, a partners' pleasure or giving subservience. A lot of people assume one must enjoy sex itself to have a pleasurable sexual experience, and from talking with particular types of asexuals that's not the case. Sex itself for some of 'em is considered 'meh', it's the making a partner happy that gives them pleasure. While with me, sexual attraction doesn't exist as-such- i like people and i like sex itself, the physical looks and such that usually denote sexual attraction I couldn't care less about in most circumstances, discounting physical incompatibility for particular actions, of course.

So what does 'into you' stand for?

It's not usually too difficult to fake having good sex, particularly if you get satisfaction from pleasing a partner and you know that's what they're looking for. But then, most of my experiences are, uh, probably outside a lot of people's frame of reference. That and pretending to enjoy a physical act, to me, doesn't equal bad sex. It just means physically or emotionally I can take it or leave it, but pleasing partners makes me happy, so.

 

[cityboy-stl]

Basically it's about your money trying to prop up your ego. At the end of the day, once he's left, you're still alone. And both of you know that.

That's just so very sad.

^ This

No. I would only have sex with someone who wanted to have sex with me and we'd do it because we wanted to. Not because there was money exchanged.

I give money to the guy who delivers my Pizza and does my dry cleaning. Not the guy who I shag.

and this.

I go out with people want to be with me, not because I pay them.

 

[Elwood]

Well at first I guess it would be being sexually compatible, or being into that "type" of person. Let me try and explain what I mean, when we are discussing "escorting". If I were an escort there are certain types of people or body types that turn me right off. So therefore if I were to happen to meet one of these types as a client I am not sure I would be able to go through with it, and I truly doubt I would be able to enjoy it or even fake that I am enjoying it.

See for me I do not think I could fake having good sex, but then again I have never been an escort where I have had to fake it. Hmm you maybe on to something...

But on the other hand I have been with escorts where the sex has been absolutely horrible, and they have not been into it at all ,does that just make them bad actors?

Interesting discussion by the way.

 

[luckynumbah7]

What's with the view that sex for money means one partner doesn't want or enjoy the sex bit, let alone someone's company?

Escorts et al - it generally isn't that someone is considered so bad a person they have to lure partners in with money. It's like any other self serviced job provided you haven't been forced into it against your will, nor is it the only kind of job that comes with mental work. It still takes at least 2 people to have sex and it's more of a contractual thing. - the escort can refuse whatever they wish. Bodily autonomy is a thing.

I find it weird that a pornographer thinks sex for money means the people aren't enjoying themselves. You can fuck for money and still like the person.

 

[ravenstar]

Wouldn't be the first time.

 

[luckynumbah7]

Bad actors, yes. Or just lazy, because some people just go 'fuckit' and really do let the "oh god, I forgot to switch the laundry, and did Dave take the roast out of the freezer...." show. Which is kind of funny, really. I'm a fine actor in the bedroom (and you have to be if physical attraction is lacking, which is pretty much my default state, otherwise for some reason I can't quite discern people get weird. Note there is no lieing involved. Saying that "I like your -----" to someone, be it their abs, hair, dick, what-have-you is accurate, just not as a sexual attraction). but if you enjoy aspects of sex it does show which also relaxes people) but ask me to be sociable and warm at a party and I tend to come off like George Carlin in a good mood, it just doesn't work out.

Re;body types - that's actually an issue with several of the sex workers I know. Mentally they can't separate personal physical attraction from acts and bluntly they'd be better off in a different line of work, it's not good for some people's mental health.

 

[MarkScott]

Basically it's about your money trying to prop up your ego. At the end of the day, once he's left, you're still alone. And both of you know that.

That's just so very sad.

In the long run we're all dead anyway (that's even sadder), so what's your point?

 

[Pianist]

Oh, I'd go out with an escort, but not in his capacity as an escort. We'd only go out to a movie or for drinks if we had met and became friends totally unrelated to his 'job'.

As to spending money on someone so he'll pretend to like me and have sex... fuck that noise. I do a FAR superior job in pleasing myself than anyone else ever has, or will.

 

[Kyanimal]

I find the idea of Paying for Sex quite repulsive.

Don't get me wrong. I think Sex is Great! However, when Money enters the picture it tends to contaminate, degrade, what should be a Wonderful experience!

The very idea of "owning" another person, for even just a short amount of time, is truly Disgusting!

I'd much rather think of the cost of dinner, a movie, perhaps some libations, to be an offering, as opposed to an investment/acquisition.

If a certain degree of "persuasion" is not enough to get them to "play", of their own "free" will, it's simply not worth the delusion.

 

[Harke the Boeotarch]

I have used the service of escorts, I have no problem with it. I am currently seeing a trans FTM escort who I have actually fallen in love with. We have been seeing each other for six months now. I enjoy his company tremendously, and he enjoys mine, not to mention the sex is out of this world and very passionate. We also hang out together go see movies (he pays one time and I pay the next time), watch TV shows together, cook meals together we have even gone clothes shopping together lol.

I pay him for the sex but not the other stuff, we cuddle when watching TV and sometime we just lie in bed laughing and talking after sex for hours. I consider him a friend and I look at it as I am helping him out. I have tried to stop seeing him twice now, but have become completely miserable and miss him terribly when I don't see him. I realize it is probably not the healthiest relationship, but it makes me extremely happy when I am with him and for the moment and that works for me. We even celebrated our 6 month anniversary together and he bought me a present.

I am not ashamed about it at all. My good friends know about him. I am not going to lie and tell you they are ok with it, but like I said he makes me soooo happy I don't care.

Falling in love with a prostitute usually means setting yourself up for disaster. Financial to say the least.

 

[rareboy]

Basically it's about your money trying to prop up your ego. At the end of the day, once he's left, you're still alone. And both of you know that.

That's just so very sad.

Pretty much this.

 

[TheLoveableLoner]

The very idea of "owning" another person, for even just a short amount of time, is truly Disgusting!

If they're consenting, I see no problem.

I'd much rather think of the cost of dinner, a movie, perhaps some libations, to be an offering, as opposed to an investment/acquisition.

So basically socially acceptable prostitution. Paying for sex is gross. Paying for dinner for sex is romance.

 

[tarallucci]

I would not, because it would be like peeling an inviting banana and then finding out it's completely rotten