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Ten reasons why gay marriage is wrong!
1.Being gay is not natural. This world has no place for unnatural things such as telephones, air conditioning and highways.
2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay. Just think of all the people who have become taller by hanging around tall people, and all those people whose skin color changed when they visited Africa.
3. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society and we will never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't addapted to cars, the internet, tv or longer life spans.
4. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5. Straight marriage would be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed! The sanctity of Britney spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children. Indeed straight couples who don't produce children will soon be forced to separate.
7. Gay parents will raise gay children, just like straight parents only raise straight children.
8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion and we should only
legalize what religion sanctifies -like holy wars, slavery and smiting your neighbors for wearing mixed fibre garments or eating shrimp.
9. Children can never succeed without a male and female role model. That's why single parenting is illegal.
10. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because, as we know, dogs have legal standing and can sign marriage contracts.
I wish I could claim that I authored this...
1.Being gay is not natural. This world has no place for unnatural things such as telephones, air conditioning and highways.
2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay. Just think of all the people who have become taller by hanging around tall people, and all those people whose skin color changed when they visited Africa.
3. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society and we will never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't addapted to cars, the internet, tv or longer life spans.
4. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5. Straight marriage would be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed! The sanctity of Britney spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would be destroyed.
6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children. Indeed straight couples who don't produce children will soon be forced to separate.
7. Gay parents will raise gay children, just like straight parents only raise straight children.
8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion and we should only
legalize what religion sanctifies -like holy wars, slavery and smiting your neighbors for wearing mixed fibre garments or eating shrimp.
9. Children can never succeed without a male and female role model. That's why single parenting is illegal.
10. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behavior. People may even wish to marry their pets because, as we know, dogs have legal standing and can sign marriage contracts.
I wish I could claim that I authored this...
