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The Bitch

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wutthefk

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I don't know what to do anymore. My brother and I live together with his girlfriend and 2 other roommates. I have known my brothers girlfriend for about 10 years. Ever since they started dating she has been so controlling and the double standards with her are ridiculous. She found out that he had talked to this girl in his math class and she was so pissed she told him he HAD to tell her that he had a girlfriend and wasn't allowed to talk to her, but she gets numbers from all of these guys she works with who text her at all hours of the night and if he says anything she gets pissed off. Also, they have only been dating for about 7 months and they have broken up about 8-10 times.

She also was supposed to get a puppy and it ended up dying shortly after birth and she was devastated and so my brother got her a puppy from a friend. Shortly after she refused to take the dog out and even asks ME to take the dog out and its not even my damn dog. To to mention we live up north and it is usually around 0 to -10 degrees outside right now.

Every time they go to the store he HAS to buy her stuff or she throws hissy fits and gives him the silent treatment. These are not small gifts either. After helping her get a loan so she could get a new car we went to a nice restaurant because it is what SHE wanted. She ordered a $40 steak and then didn't even barely touch it. One time he bought her a ring that was more than $300 and she lost it two weeks later and said that it was HIS fault because he didn't buy her a jewelry box to go with it. She has since lost the ring 4 more times, each time one of the roommates finds it either on the floor (because her dog was chewing on it) or in the bathtub next to the drain.

Everytime we go to the movies together she HAS to get a large popcorn and she takes about five bites and sets it on the floor and either knocks it over or forgets it. My brother works three jobs and whatever free time he does have HAS to be completely devoted to her.

When she first moved in she was in a lot of debt so he told her that he would pay for her first two months worth of rent. The first month she was supposed to start paying rent she didn't have enough to cover it so he said "well I will get this months". instead of saying thanks she replies "yeah, you should because you told me I didn't have to pay until next month"

He does so much for her and is such a nice guy and everyone she meets (doctors etc.) tell her that he is so good to her and she just rolls her eyes. I have never heard her say thank you once.

Another thing is they will go grocery shopping and she will say "I will buy them this time" and then she will grab $150 worth of food and when they get to the register, you guessed it! "I forgot my money"

She will also ask to borrow money from me as well as my brother because she doesn't have enough for insurance or whatever but then she will go out and buy $50 worth of makeup and later throw it away because it isn't the right color or doesn't make her look pretty enough.

sorry this is kind of long but I needed to vent. I am just so fed up with the way she treats my brother and sometimes myself. What do you guys think?:grrr:
 
Should definitely talk to your brother about it first...

If I were you, I'd give whatever attitude she deserves to put her in place :).
 
She sounds like a spoiled brat. Do your other roommates notice this and get pissed too, or is it just you? I only ask because if they could back you up, that would help a lot.

I think what you need to do is find another place to live and basically tell your brother that it's her or you. You don't have to stop talking to him, but tell him you won't live with him anymore if he's still with that controlling, spoiled-ass bitch. Tell him how concerned you are about the way she acts, how she is taking advantage of him and then say, "look, it's your choice to be with her or not, but I can't stick around and watch it and often get sucked into it anymore." It might get confrontational but somehow I doubt it. If your brother is this much of a doormat, he probably won't put up much of a fight while you tell him how it really is.
 
I agree that you need to move out. In the meantime stop doing her bidding. Just because her brother doesn't stand up to her doesn't mean you can't.
 
Give it an honest shot to tell your brother like it is, but it is ultimately up to him. He might not want to hear it either, so don't waste your time and energy till youre blue in the face, cuz one good talk is enough.

If things don't change, I say, move out, cuz you don't want to have to be dealing with this BS, and as much as you care about your brother, you don't want to feel like it's your responsibility to clean up the mess, try to change the situation, or make it better.

I deal with the same thing with regards to my parents' messed up marriage, which is actually, pretty similar. I have been down this road, and at some point, I have to turn the other cheek cuz it's not gonna change. I just listen, and be there, when need be, but I keep a boundary at the same time - otherwise, I'd be mad all the time.
 
Talk to your brother about her behaviour. Based on your description it seems like she is very annoying, but the "move out" advice sounds like a major overreaction. She's asked you to walk her dog, but that's the only thing you listed that she has done to you directly. Other than that it sounds like she's your brother's problem. If you're living with multiple roommates you have to expect irritating personality traits.
 
I have a good friend whose fiancee is pretty bad, but not as bad as your brother's gf! She's a high-school teacher as well, and like many teachers seems to forget that at home she isn't in charge of the class.

Still, we had it out at one stage and that got it all sorted out. I got tired of the pushiness and the temper tantrums and general high-maintenance she hurled my way and I said to her "Listen, I'm not your fiance and I'm not one of your schoolkids, so I don't actually have to put up with any of your shit. Understand?"

End of story. She's better now; at least, she is to me, so it's kinda mission accomplished.

But good luck to you. Sounds like you'll need it!

-d-
 
Tell your brother you need to speak to him privately. Tell him you care for him and that you can't stand to see him taken advantage of any longer. Make sure you clear that the reason your telling him this is because you love him and don't want to see him treated like that. He may get angry and not want to hear it. If so, let it go. You did your part. He's an adult and if he chooses to be kicked around that's his choice.

As for the way she treats you. That shit would be so over. I'd let her know that you are not lending her money and she can walk her own fucking dog. I wouldn't help her with a thing. NOTHING. If the living situation doesn't improve talk with the other roomies. Either she needs to go or you will. Don't make it confrontational with them. Just that you are done living like this. Chances are they have had enough of her bs and want her out too.

Good luck. Let us know how it's going.
 
wutthefk said:
I don't know what to do anymore.
Click to expand...

As she is your brother's girlfriend it is for him to do. Your only (legal) choices are:
1) Talk to your brother about her and get him to do what needs to be done.
2) Learn to deal with it.
3) Move out and find another place to live.

If none of those work for you there is one more option. But it involves her disappearing, and I don't think you really want to go there... :lol:

Seriously I would say either talk to your brother and let him know you will not take it anymore, or move out.
 
not that i'd say you should make a big deal of it. but who's names are on the leases? I'm assuming you rent. if your name is on the lease and her's isn't and you really are tired of putting up with her talk to you brother about her behavior and then if it doesn't improve you can talk again and that's when you might consider talking about her moving out not you.
 
to whom is she responsible for her portion of the rent? does she split it with her boyfriend, or does she owe an equal share like all of you?
 
The title of this post says it all.
A beer maintenance chick with a champagne thirst.
Make sure bro knows what he is getting into and then either you go or she goes. Financially that will be tough on you, but you need happiness.
 
Very simply the cunt's gotta go. She'll NEVER change & your brother apparently has no balls. YOU & you roomates have to either get her out or move out yourselves. Personally I'd make her life so unbearable that she'd have no choice but to leave. What the hell does she look like? For your brother's sake I hope she "at least" has a great body. I'll bet she doesn't give it up either--typical!
 
Aw i think your adorable for putting up with her but you deserve better. So does your brother but he cant see it and you can. Get out while you have the chance, best of luck xo
 
Ok, so this is what happened.

My brother told her that it isn't working out and that he is going to live with my parents until the end of the semester (our parents live in the town we are all going to school at) and she told him that she was going to be out of the apartment by the end of the semester, and then he was going to move back in. She then told me that she was going to be out of the apartment by Sunday.

I told her that I didn't know why she was yelling at me and involving me in the situation because honestly it is none of my business (except where rent is involved) my brother paid in advance for this next month's rent. My brother's gf and I got into a few confrontations but I think of her as a sister and my parents practically raised her so I was upset it didn't work out between the two...and she just told me she was sorry she said those things and she only said them because she was hurting; and she said she believed my brother was her soul mate and now he isn't there for her.

Honestly when both of them are at their best then they are great together and I love both of them...but she is just so high maintenance and my brother is working 3 jobs and going to school full-time and he said that he just can't handle it anymore. they have since talked and she said she wants to be friends but she is trying to find an apt with one of her co-workers.

Hopefully everything works out :D
 
She sounds like shes fucking manipulating everything. Good riddance. What the hell could possibly be hurting when you have a guy running around you doing everything for you? Did she forget her money each time, forget to work, and forget to pay the rent because she was hurting?
Shes just lost the one guy who puts up with her BS and gives her an easy run for her money - of course she's sorry.
 
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