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fuck you, i just threw up in my mouth.![]()
"No, I'm using Madonna's new diet plan to lose weight." My dad retorts "I doubt that she purges." I manage a succinct reply before the festivities are called into action again "not her, him."

& kisses
for a quick mend luv............Yuki
winky
When I read your OP that was my first thought - sounds like kidney stones. Glad you're feeling better.
or whatever.
the pain.
THEEE EPPPPAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNN NN
PAIN!!!!
warning: strong use of descriptive analogies and imagery of bodily functions ahead. (you have been warned)
So I wake up at 5 am this morning tossing and turning. I was sweating a bit, but thought that since i had two quilts and my down comforter... that I was just overly warm. Yeah, not to much. The sweating continued. Around 6 I had to do "something" down there so off I went to the bathroom. The hazmat cleanup bill is gonna set me back a bit.
I headed downstairs to shower, my muscles were twitching smasmodically. I began to wonder what I ate, but nothing came to mind as being overly nefarious the previous day. I did however jog. And I did lots of it and got really warm. Really really warm, that and sore as all fuck. When i went to bed my lower back was achey (in retrospect this is important) and I thought I just overdid it.
So I get showered up and come back to bed. Not 15 minutes later the upper half of my body wishes to take part in the celebration known as "The morning of projectile bodily fluids."
I run the bathwater in the tub as I sit on the toilet a humbled man with my drawers around my ankles sobbing quietly. My dad passes by the closed bathroom door "what are ya? sick or something?" Fortunately my wit and humor remain intact and undisturbed "No, I'm using Madonna's new diet plan to lose weight." My dad retorts "I doubt that she purges." I manage a succinct reply before the festivities are called into action again "not her, him."
The morning passes in such a way that I fear for the local flaura and fauna near the water treatment plant at which my pipes invariably lead. I offer many prayers those who will die in the aftermath.
I somehow, most likely through my stubborness, survive the morning's ordeals, I find myself sitting at the top of the stairs a defeated and weak shell of who I once was. Other than that I was feeling quite spry and chipper. I displayed no signs of illness or whole body achiness as one would expect with the flu or other such evil and vile bugs.
Two people I know for a fact at work had already called in. One is a blatant lying hypochondriac. "well john, some people are just sickly" No, she's a lying cunt. I've been keeping a dosiere on her since a month after I started, she has had 3 grandmothers die and she's been to enough funerals it makes the Iraq war look like child's play. The other truly is sick, she was not well. So I head into work think ing I could make it.
Well the third trip to the bathroom was after I had a very bad spasm and ache in my lower back. I had to piss all of a sudden.
Fortunately there were no passer-by's as they would have thought I was delivering a highly energetic and lively sermon to our lord and personal savior Jesus Hernando Christ.
This color closely approximates what came out of my winky.
I went to my manager and indicated that I should probably head home. She had a comment about how she doesn't have any reliable people. I went off on a small tirade about how i'm never sick, i never call in, I come in whenever they call me, even at 3am to fix the photo machine for 5 minutes. I then went to the office and clocked out.
I got home and tried to pee again and there is deffinitely some pressure building up in the pipes
I hurt, I'm scared, and i'm using humor to distract myself from what I perceive will be quite a painful series of events I will experience over the next couple days. I've made an appointment with the doctor for 2 pm. I'm currently downing purified water by the ton.
hold me.

