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The Highjack Thread

My penis is 12 inches but I don't use it as a rule.

(OH the old ones are the good ones - feel free to disagree)


Edit: oh that wasn't a proper highjack - for 12 inches read 'a foot'
 
Cool is a vastly overused word here in California. How can Cool and Hot both mean the samething when used as adjectives?
 
I called Sir Chris de Lube's bluff one time, and ended up falling in love with him!
 
The royal flush:

The flushing toilet may be one of the most important inventions in the history of civilization... it was in fact not invented by Thomas Crapper as most people think, but by a British nobleman Sir John Harington, godson of Queen Elizabeth I.

During the Middle Ages, people in the British isles used chamber pots made of glass and metal at night. In the morning they emptied their chamber pots out the window. Queen Elizabeth I used a portable toilet shaped like a box covered with red velvet and trimmed in lace with a lid and carrying handles. Sir John Harrington, invented a flushing toilet for her in 1596; the device had a valve that when pulled would release water from a water closet. Sir John recommended flushing the toilet once or twice a day.
 
I love carniolus' highjacks, they're so informative - but they always raise questions in my mind, for example: if there are mermaids there are presumably mermen, now if a merman was gay but he wasn't 'out', would he be in the 'water closet'?
 
When Iacobus Gallus died in Prague in 1591, his friends published the following obituary: IN TVMVMLVM IACOBI HANDELII CARNIOLI INSIGNIS MVSICAE PRACTICAE ARTIFICIS QVI PRAGAE III. (POST) IDVS IVLII PIE IN CHRISTO OBDORMIVIT ANNO M. D. XC. I. Translated this means: "On the tomb of Jacob Handl the Carniolan, the famous master of practical music, which piously fell asleep in Christ in Prague, the fourth day after the ides of July in the year 1591". On the obituary there is also a portrait of the composer in wood engraving. Next to it is an inscription: IACOBVS HANDL: GALLVS DICTVS: AETATIS SVAE XL: ANNO MDXC. The composer's name was Jacob and his surname was actually Handl or Handl or Handl or maybe Handl. The man also has a special name; we might say a pseudonym or - even better - an artistic name: Gallus, which means a cockerel. He is a Carniolan, therefore he must have been born in the Duchy of Carniola. The term Carniolan tells of his origins or homeland, nothing however about his nationality. He was most likely a Slovene, since most of the population was Slovenian. The man in the picture was 40 years old in 1590, thus it is not hard to calculate that he was born in 1550.
 
Gallus's wide-ranging, eclectic style blended archaism and modernity. He rarely used cantus firmus, preferring the then-new Venetian polychoral manner, yet he was equally conversant with earlier imitative techniques. Some of his chromatic transitions foreshadowed the breakup of modality; his five-voice motet Mirabile mysterium contains chromaticism worthy of Don Carlo Gesualdo. He enjoyed word painting in the style of the madrigal, yet he could write the simple Ecce quomodo moritur justus later used by Georg Friedrich Händel in his funeral anthem The Ways of Zion Do Mourn.

Now, the interesting thing about both composers is that they shared the same surname... but what is even more ineresting is the fact that when some English singer (named Gordon) complained of Handel's method of accompanying, saying that If Handel persisted in accompanying him in this manner, he would jump on Handel's harpsichord and smash it to pieces. Handel is said to have replied,

"Oh! Let me know when you will do that, and I will advertise it. For I am sure more people will come to see you jump, than to hear you sing."
 
During the entire Baroque period, Alonso Lobo's music was highly regarded in Portugal, Mexico, and Spain. Some of his work, such as a six-voice lamentations for Holy Saturday, earned a popularity that far outlasted his life. Lobo's known styles range from a typically Spanish (and beautiful) blending of the Palestrinian idiom with a lively, erudite profundity to the majestic polychoral manner of Tomás Luis de Victoria. Victoria, who has kept his reputation as the greatest Spanish composer of the time, considered Lobo his equal. Lobo was born in the town of Osuna, Spain, to parents who were both natives of the place. By the age of 11, he had become a boy chorister at the Seville Cathedral. Professional interest led him later to study law at Osuna University, and on September 20, 1581, degree in hand, he obtained a post as chapter secretary. A man of many talents, Lobo was a canon within five years. Francisco Guerrero, the maestro di cappella at Seville Cathedral at the time, was now more than 60 years old and in need of help with his duties, so in 1591 Lobo was made his assistant. In the same year, Lobo took on full responsibilities for the choir while Guerrero was away. Lobo then went on to acquire a maestro di cappella post for himself at the Toledo Cathedral in 1593. Lobo returned to the Seville Cathedral in 1604, Guerrero having died in 1599, to take up the maestro di cappella post there. He seems to have stayed on at Seville until his death in 1617. Thankfully, a good number of Lobo's works survive in a collection published in 1602.

:kiss:
 
NOW is the time to get this thread back on track and the subject is highjacking;....or...How Tall do you get when wanking?
 
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