Chapter 23- Definite Drama; Dangerous Decisions
As the evening rolled on, I kept thinking about how I was going to make it work with Sandra. She was was such a great girl and we had so much in common that it should be the easiest thing in the world. I was glad for my chat with Debbie as it had really sorted out my thoughts and clarified exactly what I was thinking. There was no doubt, Sandra definitely held more prospects for the future but, still, I couldn't stop thinking about the situation with Matt. He was a great kid and he deserved to be treated right.
I was sitting, watching a movie when Matt arrived home. Alone, this time.
"How was it?" I asked, trying to sound as breezy as possible.
"Disastrous." He replied bluntly.
"How come?"
"He's a lot more camp than I remember. I must have been really drunk that night- he's not my type at all."
"Oh..." I didn't know what else to say.
"You want a beer?" he smiled at my awkwardness.
"Sounds good."
He returned from the makeshift kitchen a minute later with two room-temperature bottles of been. He handed me one, took a swig from his and nearly spat it out.
"Fuck! You really need to get a fridge," he laughed.
I took a gulp of mine and he was right, "yup, it's fucking disgusting."
We both laughed and this seemed to ease the tension between us. However, I still didn't want to be the one to bring up what had happened earlier and I didn't think he would either.
"Right, I'm going to bed then." he said.
"Already?" I questioned, "It's still early,"
"Well, there's no beer so I'm going to go to sleep."
"Why don't we go out? Your call."
"What, like a date?" He smiled. He had a great smile.
"No, not like a date!" I giggled back. "Like two mates, because that's what we are now."
"Yes, Ernie. I'm more than aware of that." he sounded disappointed. "Anyway, get your glad rags on we're going to Pretty."
"Pretty?!"
"Yup, you said it was my choice and I want to go to Pretty."
"OK..." I sighed "but we can't be too late, we've got the wedding rehearsal tomorrow."
"Oh yeah- that's going to be awkward! What with Stephen not talking to either of us!"
"Screw Stephen!" I replied.
"Hah! If you did, that would make the situation a hell of a lot easier!" he smiled. "Now got and get ready, I'll call the taxi."
Thirty minutes later, we were sitting in Pretty trying to have a conversation over the whirring beats and heavy bass line of today's favourite pop song. It was difficult to hear what Matt was saying so we spent a lot of the time sitting in silence, people watching. Matt seemed to get a lot of attention from guys. Those that didn't come and introduce themselves to him would give long, lingering glances as they passed our table.
Of those that did come and speak, not one of them last more than an exchange of a few pleasantries; he seemed to be an expert as dismissing guys without leaving them upset.
By this point we'd been in Pretty for a few hours and both of us were marginally drunk.
"What are you saying to get rid of them so quickly?" I asked when the seventh guy had left after giving me a knowing nod.
"Oh! I'm just saying that we're a couple."
"Are you fucking serious? So everyone in here thinks I'm a fag?"
"It's just easier to get rid of them that way, if they think I'm unavailable, they stop pestering me. I do it all the time with my gay mates."
"Yeah, but I'm not one of your gay mates, Matt. How many times do I need to tell you that?"
"I'm just messing. It's better than having some ugly guy bothering me."
"Can't you find another way? Rather than having everyone thinking that I'm gay?"
"Oh, for fuck's sake, lighten up! Your so fucking highly strung. You're in a gay bar! If you're that worried about what people think, why don't you fuck off and go home. In fact, even better, I've had enough of being around you today, I'm going."
"Matt! Wait!" I jumped up and followed him.
He was walking out the door as I caught up with him.
"I'm going home. You're more than welcome to come but please don't try and talk to me. I'm only sharing with you so that the cab fare is cheaper." He extended his arm, and hailed the next taxi that came past. "Blinco Avenue," he told the driver as a I got in next to him..
We sat in absolute silence for the entire journey home. I tried to catch his eye to see him smile but he pulled up the collar of his jacket and looked out of the window. When the taxi driver told us the fare, he handed me half the cash and jumped out, heading for the front door.
As I paid the driver, I noticed Matt waiting on the porch. I happy that he'd obviously stopped to clear the air.
"Are you alright," I asked as I approached him.
"Fine." he replied.
"Why haven't you gone in? Did you want to talk?"
"No, I have nothing left to say to you. Ever. I've just forgot my key."
"Oh," I said as I opened the door, letting Matt in first.
"Actually, Ernie, there is something I want to say. I'm going to move out tomorrow. I'm going to start looking for somewhere to live."
"Where you going to go in the meantime?"
"I don't know, i'll stay in a hotel or something. All I know is I can spend a minute longer in this shitty house with a guy I fucking hate."
"Hate?" I was shocked. just hours before this guy was telling me he loved me.
"Yes, Ernie. Hate. I can't fucking stand you anymore. After what's happened with my family, I thought you'd look out for me. But all you've done is fuck my head up even more."
"Matt, don't be like that."
"Like what? Acting hurt? That's exactly what I am, Ernie. Hurt. And you're the cunt that's hurt me more times in the last few months than anyone I've ever met before. So, can you see what I'm leaving now? CAN YOU?"
I stood in silence.
"Yes, you can," he continued "because every time you've hurt me, you said you're sorry about you've just gone and hurt me again. I'm leaving first thing, Ernie. You can explain to Grant and Stephen why I'm not at the rehearsal. And, now I come to mention Stephen, I hope he does manage to split you and Sandra up, because, maybe then you'll feel a tiny bit of the hurt that you've made me feel recently."
He stormed upstairs, slammed his door and the last thing I heard from him was the key turning in the lock.
***
True to his word, Matt had already left by the time I got up the next morning. He left a note on his door which simply read: Will be back for my stuff later.
Fuck! I'd done it again. Why did drama seem to follow me around? If it wasn't Sandra, it was Stephen and if not Stephen, it was Matt. Thinking about Stephen reminded me of the text he'd sent. He now had a picture of Matt and I kissing and I knew he wouldn't have any harm in using it.
I couldn't believe it but I was starting to think the only way to resolve the situation was to sleep with Stephen. Could I do it though? Not only physically but also mentally- could I go behind Grant's back just to sort out my own drama? It would make things a hell of a lot easier. It would mean that I could just move on without the fear of Sandra knowing about me and Matt and it would get Stephen off my back. But what if Grant found out? Or Sandra? Or Matt? I'd obviously pissed him off- what would he do if he found out that I'd been with Stephen just to keep Sandra?
How shit does that sound anyway? Fucking a guy just to keep my girlfriend.
I showered quickly and got ready for the rehearsal. I was apprehensive about what was about to come. I'd be seeing Stephen for the first time since he'd started trying to blackmail me and, even worse, Grant would be there so I couldn't even begin to try and iron things out with Stephen.
I arrived late. Everyone was already inside and Stephen turned to greet me.
"Hurry up, Princess Ernelia. You're late." He said in a tone that implied there was absolutely nothing wrong.
"Sorry, guys." I smiled at them all.
"Where's Matt?" asked Grant.
"I'll tell you later." I said.
We were talked through the ins and outs of the ceremony. It wasn't like a normal wedding where the groom waits and the bride enters later. Grant and Stephen had decided that they were going to walk in together at the start of the ceremony. It didn't look like it was going to be a long ceremony and I was quite happy about that. When all of Stephen and Grant's questions had been answered, Grant approached me.
"I'm sorry, I don't think we've met, I'm Grant. And you are?"
"Huh?" I replied.
"Where the fuck have you been for the last few days? I've heard nothing from you. I was actually surprised when you turned up today."
"I'm sorry, Grant. I've had so much on with the house and..."
"Yeah, yeah... Here you go again, there's always an excuse, Ernie."
"What do you mean?"
"You know exactly what I mean. Now, where's Matt?"
"No idea. He's moved out."
"Moved out? Where's he gone?" Grant was obviously shocked.
"Like I said, I have no idea. We had a bust up because he couldn't handle the fact that I want to be with Sandra. He got drunk and irrational and I've not seen him since."
"Oh... So you fucked up again then?" he asked.
"No. He's had it in his head for ages that we're going to be together and he's pissed off because I told him that it wasn't going to happen."
"And how did that idea get into his head, I wonder." Grant mumbled.
"I've never fucking said it was going to happen... He got the wrong end of the stick."
"Then wrong end of your dick, more like." Grant said sarcastically. "Look, I don't care what's happening between you two- I'm bored of your drama. But, if there is any chance you're going to fuck up mine and Stephen's big day, I'd rather you didn't come."
I was about to get angry about what had just been said but Stephen interrupted us. "Can I just have word with, Ernie a second." He said to Grant, "Its nothing important I just need to know something for his wedding favour."
Grant grunted- he hated the idea of wedding favours as he saw them as an unnecessary expense- and sloped off to talk to the others.
"Thanks for replying to my texts." Stephen said coldly while smiling sweetly.
"Thanks for blackmailing me, you little cunt." I replied.
"Now, now, Ernie. I've got pictures, you'd do well to remember that."
"So what if I do sleep with you? Will you promise to leave it?"
"I will delete the photo as soon as I've cum and we'll never speak of it again."
"Is that a promise?"
"Yes, Ernie, that's a promise. I'll even let you video us so that you have something to use against me, should I go back on my word."
"OK. I'll do it. Come to mine tomorrow at 8pm." I said, hoping this would be the end of it.
