The JUB Confessional

[Sha-Rok]

My name is Father Chris. I'm not here to judge, I am just an ear. Tell me your sins and I'll tell you mines Really I just feel like getting this off my chest..
*By posting in this thread you promise not to Judge anybody's actions*

Once upon a time I cheated on my ex with two guys in the same day and it wasn't a threesome. oops

 

[kevbo]

Forgive me father, for I have sinned.

I slept with... a MAN...

 

[ChickenGuy]

Forgive me, Father Chris, for I have sinned.

I have had no belief in religion all my life. Nor does it trouble me, or worry me.

Erm....

Hang on....

If I don't believe it, what am I in this confessional box for?

And priests are supposed to be old and decrepid. Why am I confessing to a hot, good-looking young guy?

I can think of a lot better things we could be doing....

*knocks on the partition*

Hey, Father Chris! Did I mention to you that I've never sucked a black dick before?

 

[Sha-Rok]

Forgive me, Father Chris, for I have sinned.

I have had no belief in religion all my life. Nor does it trouble me, or worry me.

Erm....

Hang on....

If I don't believe it, what am I in this confessional box for?

And priests are supposed to be old and decrepid. Why am I confessing to a hot, good-looking young guy?

I can think of a lot better things we could be doing....

*knocks on the partition*

Hey, Father Chris! Did I mention to you that I've never sucked a black dick before?

The Vatican decided that the old decrepit priests were to occupied with *Clears throat* so I'm here for you my son.

 

[Sha-Rok]

Jesus. That's a bit harsh.

I have to confess. I am a member of a gay porn community forum. A den of sin, so to speak.

We shall not judge our brother.

 

[Reality101]

I was in a drunk driving accident. I was the driver. No one was hurt beyond scrapes and bruises but my reputation and respect is forever damaged no matter what I do from here on out. How's that for a confession?

Next.

 

[desmond]

Hang on Father Chris, I expressed myself and it scared me and I woke resolved never to do it again, and I looked around me and said fuck that, so what could be the penance for that?

 

[freefall]

Forgive me Father, for I'm thinking of fondling you, yanking you, and-

WHAT THE FUCK AM I SAYING

 

[desmond]

penance makes the heart get fondled

 

[Lawnmowerman]

I have bouts of road rage; I don't start them but I escalate them a bit too far. I'm not proud of this but I am trying to be more reserved on the road now before it goes TOO far one day...

 

[Lawnmowerman]

I fart around the elderly in work so I don't get blamed for it.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!

 

[Ronin84]

Oh Father, since my last confession I accuse myself of having had sex with at least 500 guys.
I read in the bible that Jesus said "I will make you fishers of men" and when I got together with the guys I just thought that I was following this precept as stated by Jesus.
A number of people told me that I was mistaken in my interpretation of the words spoken by Jesus for which I am truly sorry, but I did enjoy the guys and the sex.

 

[ozguy]

Oooooooo-wahhhhhh ..... Went into the city this morning to do some shopping and ended up getting some hot anonymous sex in a gay lounge. Forgive me, father!

 

[Sha-Rok]

Forgive me Father, for I'm thinking of fondling you, yanking you, and-

WHAT THE FUCK AM I SAYING

My child, I forgive you. But you cannot go on in this fashion. Please lower to your knees..and I'll bless you

 

[Sha-Rok]

Forgive me Father

** If I'm with a guy, I like my bootay licked before sex,
but I don't reciprocate **

My Son, I love to loosen my partner up with my tongue before sex. No reciprocation needed. Your are forgiven.

 

[Sha-Rok]

But Father, I don't like to bottom,
I just like my bootay licked..

am I still forgiven?

*Shakes head* *Turns back*

 

[Sha-Rok]

Forgive me father, I not only like sex with women but I like guys too. I just can't help myself ....

My son you are forgiven...Sometimes the love below can be a powerful tool in the female army.

 

[SilverWolf]

Forgive me...I...I...play with myself at night!

 

[BrainDamage]

Forgive me...I...I...play with myself at night!

It's because of you that we have global warming.