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The Lovers in Rossford

That was a great continuation! I am glad Dylan and Fenn are still so close despite what Dylan has been up to in the recent past. I know Noah told James how he felt about Paul but hearing that they actually had sex is a different thing. Who knows what James will do now. Excellent writing and I look forward to more soon!
 
Of course for me its not simply that Dylan and Fenn are still close despite what has happened, but that they are closer because they have dealt with what has happened. Ferguson is learning a great deal and so is Bryant,and Dylan must have been dealing with some stuff at that particular moment of revelation. As for James, yes, well, that's for tomorrow night.
 
WEEKEND PORTION PART ONE


“Everything is straightened out, and Noah’s employed and…
you had something to do with that?” Danasia demanded.
“I’d like to think I did,” Ron said.
They were sitting up in bed and Danasia said, “What the
hell is that?”
“It’s from Mathan’s room.”
“We got a baby trying to sleep, and funerals to plan,”
Danasia got up. “He better knock that shit off.”
She left her room and went next door. She wrapped on the
door, and then went in.

There was a gasp, and in the dark she vaguely saw
something, so she just flipped on the light.

Meredith lay under Mathan, her hair all a tangle, and they
were both looking at her in shock and surprise.
Danasia took a deep breath, said, “Baby’s trying to sleep.”

And then, flipping the light out, she backed out of the
room, and closed the door behind her.
Back in their room, Ron looked up at her.
“Well,” was all Danasia said.
“Well, well.”



Sheridan felt outside of everything. Layla’s great grandmother
was dead. He had never known her. He felt badly for Layla and
for her family, but didn’t know what to do. Somehow he felt
that since things with Chay had ended, he was the one shut out
from everyone. It must have been made up. He must have
been pretending. Before heading for school he went through
the mail pile and pulled up:
“The magazine, Logan! Logan, it’s your magazine.”
Logan was washing his face in the bathroom when Sheridan
came in and said, “Logan, look!”
“What’s that?” Logan said.
Sheridan handed him the magazine.
“Look, it’s you. You’re famous. I bet you’re online. I bet
people will be commenting about it.”
Sheridan left Logan with the magazine in his hand while he
went to the computer.
“This is the start of the new you,” Sheridan began. “This is
the start of a new us, really. I mean, you’re going to be the
greatest model around, and you won’t ever have to do porn
again. That’s all going to end.
“Oh, man, here you are! Logan Banford…
“Logan Banford, formerly known as Logan Wrathbone
from Casey William’s Live and Guy McClintock’s Rude Boys,
has begun a new career in modeling. Says Banford, ‘I really
want to get into more modeling and maybe music. Porn was a
stepping stone to…’ Oh, this is really neat, Logan. Logan?”
Sheridan stopped.
“Logan.”
He got up and went looking for Logan, but Logan was
standing in the hallway. Sheridan couldn’t discern what his
look meant, but it wasn’t joyful.
“Logan—”
“Sheridan, you’re so stupid,” he said.
Sheridan stopped.
Logan opened the magazine up and said, “This is me
stroking my cock. This is me with my dick hanging half hard
between my legs.”
“It’s hot, but it’s modeling. It’s not what you used to do.”
“It’s exactly what I used to do.”
Logan tossed the magazine at Sheridan who jumped away.
“Nothing’s changed, Sheridan.”



When Paul and his bags arrived back home and he began
searching for Kirk, he pulled his phone out of his pocket and
called him.
“I can’t find your car. I thought you’d be in the airport.”
“I’m with the kids,” Kirk said.
“What?”
“I just want to know one thing.”
“Alright?”
“Did you fuck him?”
“Wha?”
“Did you fuck Noah?”
When Paul said nothing, Kirk said, “That says everything.
Thanks.”
“Kirk?”
“Noah is waiting for you. I told him to pick you up. When
you get here, don’t worry. I won’t be here. The kids won’t
either. We’ll work out something.”
“Kirk, wait. No—”
“I’m tired of waiting. I’ve been waiting for twelve years for
you to leave me.
“You know what I did last night? I fucked some guy. I sent
the kids to Sheila’s and I spent the night fucking and getting
fucked and, shit, maybe I’ll do it some more. Because I know
who you are. Goodbye, Paul. I hope you have… a great life.”
And then Kirk was gone and Paul was stunned.

Paul felt a tightening in his chest as he shifted his bag and
walked down the concourse. He saw Noah lifting a hand and
waving at him somberly.
Paul moved toward Noah and they stood facing each other.
“Noah?” Paul said.
“James found out,” Noah said, simply. “He found out. He
left. He’s gone.”



My Noah,
We shouldn’t put tears where they don’t belong, or weep when there is
no cause for weeping. At least we shouldn’t weep for sadness when we
should be crying for joy. What you loved about me was that I wasn’t like
other people, and hopefully you’ll love this still.

By now you will have heard that I am gone because I found out
something. It doesn’t matter who I learned it from or where. You may be
tempted to think I am angry, or in despair that you and Paul are lovers. I
am sad, a little, but that is it. And not sad for the reasons some might
think. My sorrow comes from the truth that I cannot muster rage or anger
or passion and I know this means in my own way I have betrayed you as
much as you betrayed me. Or maybe we shouldn’t even look at it as a
betrayal. Maybe we should just look at it as the end of what we had.
What we had was good, a mini lifetime together before my passion passed
on and yours began to burn, but not for me.

So I have made it easy, and I hope you have the sense to not give into
dramatic gestures and run after me. You can’t find me. You must tell
Paul there are no hard feelings toward him. I have seen for a long while
before this the struggle on his face and in his eyes, and it was a struggle
involving a passion and a desire I can no longer give you. What I can give
you is freedom, and what I can give you is a clear way to the man who has
loved you for years.

I will see you again, and sooner than we both think, probably. We
have one son, our only son between us, your face and my name. Do not
think of this as the end, but as the beginning. I think it may be the
beginning of all things.
Your first love, first husband and constant friend,
James Lewis

Paul’s knuckles went white and his face dried and drained of
color as Noah read. Now and again Noah stopped to put the
letter down, to touch his eyes.

When he was finished he wept all the way back into
Rossford.




Chay stood beside Casey’s chair while Logan and Sheridan sat
on the other side.
“Well, what do you think, babe?”
Chay shrugged at Casey’s question.
“This is the least of my problems. In fact, it’s not even my
problem.”
“It is,” Casey argued, “It’s our problem. Yours and mine.”
Just like that, in one sentence, Casey had given Chay the gift
of permanence. He had declared them a unit.
“I don’t move without you moving with me, so tell me how
you want to move.”
“I think that there are four magazines off the top of my
head Logan can go to,” Chay said. “And I think that my uncle will be a
good agent for him.”
“Thank you,” Sheridan said with a sigh of relief.
Logan was afraid to reveal too much emotion.
“You should have come to me in the beginning,” Casey
said.
Logan nodded.
“Logan, I make no apologies for anything I’ve done. I can’t
remember the last time I made a movie. But the last time I was
in one, I wanted to do it. You need to learn to say no. You
need to not be so afraid, or you’ll kill yourself. One way or
another you’ll kill yourself.”
“Thanks, Casey,” Logan said, his voice small.
“And this one loves you,” Casey gestured to Sheridan. “I
mean, obviously. Don’t kill what you guys got.
“Now get the hell out of here.”

Sheridan thanked Casey as he and Logan turned to go.
And then, when they were gone, Logan came back in.
“Chay?”
“Yes.”
“I know what I did to you. I know, and I’m sorry.”
Chay shook his head.
“All you did was love someone. All you did was send me
back to the someone who loved me.”

When Logan was gone, Chay waited a moment and then
said, “Uncle Ron doesn’t know why Dad left, does he?”
“He knows that things are over. Maybe Paul and Noah
better keep things under raps for a while.”
“Maybe,” Chay agreed. “But I can’t help thinking that no
matter when they get together, Uncle Ron will always blame
them for James leaving.”
“And you?”
Chay shook his head.
“My dads were always strange, together and apart. I don’t
know. I can’t say.”
Casey swiveled from behind his desk and Chay sat on his
lap.
“All I know is we are solid. That’s what I know.”
“Yes we are, Mr. Lewis,” Casey Williams said, putting his
arms around Chay’s waist. “Yes, indeed.”



Fenn woke up instantly, in the night dark bedroom, when
Todd sat down on the edge of the bed.
“You’re here! You’re finally here.”
Todd bent down and kissed him.
“Of course I’m here.”
“And now everything’s better,” Fenn said, sitting up. He
took Todd’s hand.
“It’s impossible, really, to think about life without you for
very long.”
“Well, there’s always that suicide pact.”
“Don’t be sick,” Fenn said. “You must be tired. You want a
bath? Or do you want that later?” he asked, unloosening
Todd’s tie, and climbing out of bed to help him undress.
“When I think of collapsing in the bed, I think of how foul
I feel. When I think of water, I think of how much I want to
sleep.”
“And you need a shave,” Fenn said.
“I thought you liked me hairy.”
“I like you anyway I can have you, my dear. But, you just
lay down here.”
He began to unlace Todd’s shoes. “I’ve slept, and Dylan’s
been taking great care of me. Perhaps he masterminded the
death of his great-grandmother to get off punishment, but I
don’t think so. I’ve had plenty of time to rest, and I’m going to
run you a bath. Just sit there.”

Fenn left the room to go downstairs for the dishwashing
liquid, which he always used in place of bath foams—he didn’t
believe in them. And there was some Epsom salt too. Neither
one of them was getting any younger, but after twenty years,
they seemed to be equally old. He thought of his man, long
and lean and tired, stretched out on the bed half asleep, faithful
to him all of these years. What could be better than the long
tall olive skinned Todd with the bit of belly, now in middle
years, and the traces of white at the temples? What could be
sexier than that? He’d have to call Tara and Melanie, tell them
that Todd was back. They could bring Maia over.
“Todd, go back upstairs and rest,” Fenn said.
But when he turned around it was Dylan.
“Todd’s back,” he said.
“Yes.”
“Good,” Dylan said. “You’re happier when he’s around.”
“Well, I’m happy when you’re around too.”
“That’s not what I meant,” Dylan said while Fenn closed
the cabinets with the olive oil and the salt and the soap he
would put into the water.
“It’s how you are when he comes. Your eyes light up.
You… you’re making him a bath.”
“Is this going somewhere?” Fenn said. “You are the
cleverest boy with the cleverest thoughts, but sometimes they
take forever to come out.”
Dylan grinned.
“That’s how I knew that Lance wasn’t going to work. I
knew I’d never feel like that. I… the way you are with Todd.
Lance is the way you are with Dad, and not even that. I want
to feel like that for someone.”
“And maybe you will,” Fenn said, on the base of the stair.
“Unless you already do.”
“I do,” Dylan said, his face going pink.
“I guessed.”
“I’ve always felt that way about Ruthven. You know, where
you can’t imagine being without him.”
“Always? Since you were twelve?”
“Yes.”
Fenn nodded.
“Alright then.”
Fenn was heading up the stairs, and now Dylan followed
him to the top.
“Yes, son?” he said to the boy who was roughly the same
size as him.
“Then you won’t… try to stop us from being together?”
As Fenn headed back to the main bathroom he said:
“When did trying to stop you from doing anything ever
work?”
Dylan, in one of his excitements, lunged on his father’s
back and hugged him.
When Fenn recovered he said to his son, “I won’t try to
stop you. But Tom is another matter.”


WHEN WE RETURN, THE CONCLUSION OF THE LOVERS IN ROSSFORD
 
Wow lots going on in part one and lots to process! Everything is all over the place. I look forward to seeing what happens next in part two.
 
And now here it comes

- - - Updated - - -

CONCLUSION




Paul woke up, his limbs tangled with Noah’s. Last night every
fear, every bad thing, the collapse of his life, all the horror of
the future had come out in tears. He could not go back to the
empty house. He did not want to think about the empty future,
or about working things out. And Noah had been shaky still
from James’ letter.
Noah sent Paul to the shower, and then came in the shower
too and they washed each other and kissed and went to the
bed. They made love all night, letting everything out, twisting
in the sheets, waking in the sheets that were covered with
them. There was the crust of them. It hardly mattered.
Paul squeezed his thighs tight around Noah and kissed him
for a long time.
“I always loved how your breath doesn’t smell in the
morning,” Noah said.
“The secret is—”
Noah put a hand over Paul’s mouth.
“I don’t really need to know the secret.”
He buried his curly hair in Paul’s chest.
Paul grinned in spite of himself.
“Mr. Riley, would you like to fuck?”
“Again?”
“And again and again.”
Noah stretched out on his back and drew Paul’s body to
him. He was long and heavy and Noah ran his hands over the
warmth of shoulders, arms and back.
“We have a funeral to get to.”
“And we’ll get to it,” Paul said. “But let’s get to this.”
And so they got to it. This time it was as filled with
laughing and sharp sighs as with weeping the night before, and
they came one after the other, in trembling convulsions, Noah
amazed at the look on Paul’s face, the wide eyed terror and
body trembles of the orgasm. When it was done, they lay
together in the sweat and semen of the sheets, exhausted.
At length, Paul spoke.
“I think I am so in love with you.”
“I’m in love with you too.”
Paul was quiet a little longer. Noah watched his face change
as he tried for the next phrase.
“I was never committed to anyone before.”
“You were committed to Kirk.”
“That’s what I meant. Before him, I never understood
commitment.”
Noah turned and lay on his back.
“You have three children,” he whispered.
“Yes. And one Kirk. And you have one James.”
“He’s gone.”
Paul lay on his side.
“You can get him back,” he said.
“When I see the way Tom has always looked at Fenn…
Even though he loves Lee… I know.”
For a long time they lay like that, Paul’s chest pressed into
Noah’s back, his face touching Noah’s cheek.
“I know you love me, and I know I love you… and maybe
that will never change. But can you tell me,” Paul continued,
“that if you never saw James Lewis again you would be
alright?”
Suddenly, with a great sucking heave, Noah bowed his head
into his chest, pulled his knees to his stomach and began to
cry.
“But I love you,” he began.
“I know,” Paul embraced him.
“And I love him. That’s it. I do,” Noah wept so hard it
allowed Paul to shed silent tears. His face was hot with them.
“I don’t know what to do,” he wept.
“You love me, you love him. He’s your husband. I’m not.”
Noah’s weeping died down, and then he turned around and
said, “But you and Kirk?”
“We need to come together again. We drifted so far apart
we need to meet again.”
Noah sat up in bed, sniffling, and nodding.
“Do you think it will work?” he said, taking the back of his
hand across his face.
Paul shook his head. He began to laugh and cry at the same
time. Noah held him. He knew that they would end up making
love again, and that this was not going to change Paul’s answer.
Paul said: “I think I have to try.”



Layla Lawden reflected that it had been an age since she’d set
foot in Saint Barbara’s. But then that didn’t make her very
different from most of the people in here, including her greatgrandmother,
whose actual church affiliation was indefinite.
Will squeezed her hand, and she stroked the wings of his
slightly long hair. She thought of how she would never leave
his side, how they were better than married and stronger than
most relationships she’d seen despite everything. Behind her
was Sheridan with his Logan. Good luck on that, and, my God,
how many gay folks could there be in this church! There was
Chay and Casey Williams.
“They look right together. Don’t they?” Will whispered.
Layla looked at the two men, one in his early thirties, blond
and slight, the other in his early twenties, dark haired and
smaller still, both in suits. Layla discovered, “Yes.”

Dan Malloy and Keith McDonald came in from Michigan,
and Barb Affren came with Milo and Bill, Dena and Nell.

“What the hell’s going on with Meredith and Mathan?”
Claire asked as she and Julian sat down beside Layla, behind
Dena.
“What’s going on is a baby bump,” Barb Affren said. “I
found that girl’s pregnancy test.”
“Good God!” Bill muttered.
“Billy,” his mother swatted him on the head, “we’re in a
sacred place.
“But,” Barb continued, “I want to know about that.” She
pointed to where Paul and Noah were coming in together.
“Oh, my,” Dena said.
“That,” Claire said, “has a sad story all around it, but I
think it will be a happy ending.”
Laurel had arrived with Alex beside her, and Dylan and
Ruthven were with them, a party of four, a little rushed and
tired.
“This is Alex. Shake his hand,” Laurel commanded.
As they all did, she took off her coat, and said, “take this,
one of you, I’ve got to get up to the balcony.”
“I’ve never heard her sing,” Alex said.
“Well, she’s great,” Dylan told him, brandishing the case he
carried. “Especially with my trumpet.”
He headed after his cousin and in a few moments, in place
of the expected organ, Dylan’s trumpet trilled over the
congregation, blowing them all into silence. Above Dylan’s
music, Laurel sang:

Why
should I
feel discouraged,
why
should the shadows
come,
Why
should my heart be lonely,
and long for heav’n and home?
When Jesus is my portion?
My constant Friend is He:
His eye is on the sparrow,
and I know He watches me;
His eye is on the sparrow,
and I know He watches me.

Fenn heard his mother singing, and joined her.

I sing because I’m happy, I sing because I’m free,
For His eye is on the sparrow, and I know He watches me.

Layla heard her family sing and joined in with her
grandmother. Behind her were Lee and Mathan and then, as
quite a surprise, Kenny and as more of a surprise, a surprise
that made tears come to her eyes, the tall, earnest form of
Brendan Miller.




“So… you’re here to stay?” Kenny said.
“Yes,” said Brendan. They were all gathered in Todd and
Fenn’s living room.
“Why?”
“Because this is home.” Brendan spoke as if this was
obvious. “Because I can work normal hours instead of losing
myself. Because everyone I love is here.
“Because you are here, Kenneth,” he touched the red
haired man’s arm. “Because I did betray you and leave you in
the lurch and… I really can’t do this without you. All I am is
shit without you. I forgot that. So now I’m back.”
Kenny looked truly worked up. He clinched his jaws and
shook his head.
“I got something going on right now. I don’t know if you
realized that.”
Brendan looked over to Chad, who was talking to Bryant,
and said, “I think he’ll understand.”
Kenny didn’t say anything for a while. When he finally did,
it was, “Goddamnit, Brendan.”
“You don’t want to melt to me right now, it’s okay. I’ll give
it time. As much time as you need. But,” Brendan said as he
was walking off, “you gotta remember, I’m not going
anywhere.”
“Bren!”
“Yes?” Bren turned around with a mischievous look on his
face.
“Call me tonight.”
“Alright,” Brendan said, smiling triumphantly.
“Bastard,” Kenny added.



“Thanks for getting Kenny that job,” Chad said, looking over
at his friend.
“Thank you for providing me with a very competent artist,”
Bryant told him.
“He is good, isn’t he?”
Bryant nodded. He didn’t speak for a while.
Finally, Bryant said, “Everything’s not black and white, you
know? No one knows that better than me.”
Chad nodded, because he didn’t know what to say.
“What you had with Kenny isn’t anything less if it ends.”
“And what about you and Nick?”
“That is ended. That was… Well,” Bryant decided,
“Actually some things are black and white.”
At this Chad burst out laughing.
“God, I miss you, Bryant!”
“I miss you laughing at me.”
Chad said, “I need to talk to Kenny. He… maybe you
won’t get it. But he’s my best friend. We couldn’t do what we
were doing if we weren’t friends. He… at no cost he gave me
love and taught me how to love myself again. Does that sound
corny?”
“Yes,” Bryant told him. “Yes, Chad North, it certainly does.
But I do know what you mean.”
“I’m going off to talk to him,” Chad said.
“Alright,” Bryant allowed, “but where are you staying
tonight?”
“God, Bryant!” Chad said. “Really? The bed’s not even cold
from Nick.”
“Nick never slept in that bed.”
“What a picture!”
“You still have failed to answer the question.”
“Alright already,” Chad threw up his hands and grinned.
“This is like being your student again. You’re my boss, you’re
my ex, you’re my ex professor. This is so weird. Are we really
going to start this shit up again?”
“Yes,” Bryant told him. “I believe we are.”



“Are you kids going to be alright?” Layla asked Paul and Noah.
She sat on the sofa with Fenn and Todd, facing their friends.
Paul was quiet, his long legs open, his hands clasping his
knees, but Noah put a hand on Paul’s thigh.
“Yeah,” Noah said. “I think we all will be.”
“Mr. Miller,” Fenn called back. “I hear you are here to
stay.”
“Yes, Fenn.”
“Thank God. We should never be parted for so long. Life is
too short. Have a seat, I’m getting up.”
“No, take mine,” Layla said. “Will’s calling me.”
As she got up, she kissed Brendan and Brendan sat down
with his drink.
“She and Will are so happy. I wonder when they’ll tie the
knot and have a little baby Klasko padding around the house.”
At this Fenn’s face was subdued and Brendan said, “What?
Did I say something?”
So Fenn just said to the four of them, “It’s not so much a
secret as something not discussed.
“Layla and Will stopped using anything a long time ago. She
can’t have children. Or he can’t. It’s all the same.”
He remembered when Layla’s book had come out, when
she had called Will with the message that she had a surprise for
him.
“Maybe she’s pregnant,” they had teased him.
“She’s not pregnant,” Will had said with finality. But none
of them understood. How dumb of them. Brendan felt his
heart take an elevator to his feet.

“Why didn’t I know that? Why didn’t I know that about my
own best friend?”
“I don’t know,” Fenn said. “And maybe I shouldn’t have
told it. But you seem to forget, you and Kenny can’t have
children either, and neither can Noah and Paul. But they do,
and me and Todd have two between us. That tall handsome
son of mine with that blond boy is an impossibility that never
should have happened.
“None of us gets the happiness we hoped for,” Fenn said.
“But if we are unguarded with out lives…” he shrugged. “I
think we can get the happiness we never could have imagined.”





Dena Reardon Affren came out into her living room that was
lit only by the blue of the television. Brendan was on the couch
in cargo pants and a tee shirt. When she yawned he yawned,
and they sat together on the sofa.
“Couldn’t sleep?” she said.
“Didn’t want to.”
“I thought you’d stay with Kenny tonight.”
“I thought that was jumping the gun. You can’t just switch
men like that. Let him sleep alone a few nights. Invite me when
he wants to.”
“How long do you think that’ll be?”
“You trying to throw me out?’
Dena hit him with a pillow.
“You know me better than that, Bren. If I wanted you out,
I’d say get the fuck out.”
“Yes,” Brendan reflected. “You would.
“Well, with me and Kenny being me and Kenny, I
suspect—”
Brendan stopped, making a strange face.
“Hold on! My ass is ringing.”
He got up, pulling his phone from his back pocket.
“Uh… it’s Kenny.”
“Answer it.”
He did. The conversation was short, full of “ums” and
“yeahs”. When it was over, Dena looked up at Brendan:
“And…”
Bren grinned. “Well, it seems like he’ll be ready tomorrow
night.”
“He’s got it bad for you, boy.”
Brendan sat back down with a mild smile and, after texting
him, said, “We’ve got it bad for each other. Now shush and
let’s watch the movie.”
“What is it?”
“It’s one Paul did on IFC.”
“Well,” Dena said. She folded her legs under her on the
sofa.
After a while she said, “You and me and a Paul Anderson
movie. That’s how all this shit started.”
“Is it?” Brendan said, “I don’t recall.”
“I do,” Dena said. “I recall everything.”
On the screen Paul was saying:

“It doesn’t really matter what I say, or what I do. I can’t prove
anything to you. Look, this is who I am, and this is who I’m going to be.
I can’t stop it!”

“We need some popcorn,” Dena said, getting up.
“Agreed,” Brendan told her.
“With extra butter?”
“Or not at all.”
“Right,” Dena said, rising. “I’ll be right back.”
“I love you, Dena,” Brendan said. “Sometimes I forget how
much. I’m so glad we broke up, and I came out. I love you
more than I ever did.”
“Oh, Brendan Miller,” Dena said, heading to the kitchen, “I
really like you too.”
Brendan chuckled because he knew that was all he was
going to get, and from Dena Affren, that was more than
enough.
 
That was a very well done conclusion! Not everything was resolved so I am guessing there is another story? I can't wait for that! I am glad Brendan made amends to Kenny and that Chad and Bryant might be getting back together. I feel very sad for Layla that she can't have kids. Great writing and I look forward to more in a few days! Have a wonderful weekend!
 
This was the original conclusion of the whole story. I thought five was enough. I even decided that it would end the same way it began, Brendan and Dena watching a movie with Paul in, which is the first scene of the Houses in Rossford. Truth be told, I even think the story has resolution. It isn't realistic for everyone to end up happy at the same time, so I had no problem with that. However, there was ONE thing that bothered, and it was the one thing that made me sure Rossford wasn't over, and I don't think you'd ever be able to guess what it is. It is that ONE THING that is the whole reason for the next Rossford story which, I'm glad exist.
 
Yes, so am I. I'm afraid I left our friends in a bit of an after chaos slump this time around. Tell me, which of the Rossford books was your favorite? I love this one, but also thought it was pretty hard.
 
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