The story of mine... please give some advice...

[screwnutty]

Canada. Come to Canada. Same sex marriage is allowed here. Were very open-minded and we have programs to help you get adjusted to your stay here.


Good Luck!!

 

[megustamyn]

I agree with Wentworth that you should connect with an organization of gay Muslims (http://www.al-fatiha.org/). It’s very difficult for non-Muslims to understand the intricacies of the culture and the family structure and thus difficult to fully comprehend your position.

I was very much in love with a Muslim man many years ago. He had come to the United States to study and decided to stay basically because he enjoyed the freedom that being away from his family gave him. In his case, half his siblings lived in the US but his mother and older siblings were in India. We met at work and soon everyone knew we were a couple just by seeing us together, even though he always refused to talk about it even with me. Both our families treated the other as a family member, but of course no one acknowledged what the relationship really was. Once his mother came to the US for a few months. The first time I met her, we took her for a picnic and she too recognized the relationship when she us together. I know she did because we had been riding in my car for about 10 minutes when out of the blue she asked him, “When are you getting married?” He ended up marrying a Christian woman who knew about us. They were married in her hometown and later traveled to India for a traditional Indian wedding. I transferred to another office because I couldn’t deal with the whole thing and he left the company. Twenty years later he looked me up trying to start something up again although he was still married and had 3 children. I was not interested although I think he has an agreement with his wife because she called him while he was in my office, he told her where he was and she sent her regards.

I had another experience with a Filipino man who eventually came out to his family (after we had split up). They stopped speaking to him and he lost all contact with them. This family had also known, but his eldest sister asked him if he was gay and he said yes. If he lied and agreed to marry the girl they had in mind for him, they would not have cared what he did on the side.

I know that many Christians are ostracized by their families when they come out, but I believe that the familial and cultural ties are much stronger in the Muslim world and very hard for Christians to understand, especially those in the Anglo world.