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The winning game!

I win because my sister is quitting smoking
 
I win because I will be in our next house by next Friday
 
I win because I discovered proof Santa Claus was fake by catching my aunt in the act.
 
I win because I did not Dept. Store Santas as a kid. They reeked of booze,
 
I win because I will catch up to Dynk...someday
 
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