Theres this party this weekend.....

[Chardius]

And it is a planned orgy-ish experiment between close friends thing...

FIRST: CONDOMS.
SECOND: Clean STD sheet is the ticket to entry.
THIRD: These are ALL friends, no strangers, no open invites, everyone involved signs off on everyone else.

OK so now that the major safety bits are out of the way, I don't have many people I can talk to about whether or not I should go. There's a ban on speaking about this to anyone outside those invited (some of them are couples who play and others such as I are single), none of us need the drama of this shit affecting our lives because some people have problems with it. I'm not worried about that. I am pretty much sworn to secrecy but I hope the relative anonymity of JUB doesn't blow up in my face. This isn't the first time they've thrown one of these, its just the first time its been scheduled well in advance.

I'm just in this weird place of nervous excitement. It's kind of like I'm about to come out of the closet for the first time again. Whats ahead could be REALLY awesome, but it could also be really bad. This might lead to some interesting self exploration and discovery, it could also just be weird and awkward.

Partly because it isn't all guys. It is a good 50/50 split and I'm the only GAY guy going (maybe), but I fully expect to be able to get something out of these straight guys, and a girl or 2 has already agreed to ....show me around....so to speak. Now, this is a NO JUDGING environment, period. These guys/gals play with each other and have already weeded out any hint of that crap. Still, i'm gay. I'm sort of curious what being with a woman is like, and I have an oral fixation powerful enough that I might enjoy going down on one . Could I get off with a woman? Could I get a woman off? Is having the question reason enough to try? Also I might get to go down on a guy while his girlfriend watches, and thats....hot.

I'm not even sure why I'm posting, I can't talk about it with any of the normal people I talk sex stuff with because it can't really get out that this is happening and for very good reason. Instead I come to JUB, where I can at least vent my frustration.

OK SO DISCUSSION:

If given the chance for no consequence sex with people you trust, would you do it? Does it matter if its a man or a woman?

Gay isn't just a sexual orientation, its an identity. I'm not gay just because I'm homosexual, these two things cannot be the exact same thing and still make sense. It wouldn't be fair to rip away the identity of gay from a man who experiments with a woman, just like it would be unfair to rip away straight from a guy who experiments with a man. Still, do you go through with it?

Do you feel your identity threatened?

What does it mean to be OK in your homosexuality if you don't push boundaries?

I don't want to start a flame war and I don't want to end up being called a liar just because this somehow sounds like a good story. No, this is happening, this weekend and it is happening with or without me. I'm not a good enough liar to come up with something like this.

 

[jft245]

I wouldn't get involved. That's just my opinion. To much chance for drama and things going wrong.

 

[Seasoned]

It sounds like a mixed bath house environment. If the appeals to you why not just go to a bath house where it's all guys. On the other hand, assuming the doors aren't locked there's nothing stopping you from going and leaving. How much shit will you get if your the only know gay guy?

 

[AlmondMilk]

If given the chance with no consequences, I'd try it. I've always been curious. But that would be a perfect world where nothing went wrong.

Your identity won't be threatened if you want to try going down on a girl. It's experimentation. If you don't like, then don't do it anymore. That's it. Just do it safely.

 

[rareboy]

I wouldn't go.

It is a recipe for disaster.

Let's see how many of you are friends 6 months from now.

And the only homo in the crowd????

What are you thinking?

 

[EJMichaels]

I think it sounds great. It's a chance to experiment in an environment set up to facilitate it. I know what you mean about identity, but as already said, the act doesn't make the man. It's a problem for me because I'm in mixed groups a lot these days. I sometimes feel overwhelmed by too much straightness around me, even if liberated. I'm bi because I also like men, not because I also like women, but most people don't know that because I'm with a man now. (BTW, missing a gay environment is one reason I'm on JUB.) You won't have the problem of people assuming you're not gay, but some of the norms and values of the group won't be what you're used to.

 

[Harker]

If it were me, I wouldn't go, for my own reasons. And I've been to gay versions of these.

Friendships are tested, lessened, destroyed. Please remember, too, that just because someone has a "clean STD result" doesn't mean he or she is completely STD-free, ie: HIV infections have to be tested multiple times for up to 6 months to be completely ruled out, etc.

Also, I'm 100% gay. While the straight guy aspect of it might appeal to me, the gals being there would be a huge wet blanket. I'd rather go to a bathhouse for the same/better experience...

 

[KaraBulut]

Ten paragraphs and you didn't come up with a good reason why you should go... except that you were invited.

What does that tell you?

 

[TX-Beau]

I'd probably go. If I hadn't already don't the woman thing, I'd be curious, and really, it's OK and all, but men are way better and more fun and women can be a huge chore.

You can always leave if you feel uncomfortable. You can always say no to something you don't want to do, you don't have to go.

It's entirely up to you.