I am about to turn 31, and in short I NEED sex. I have never been with anyone, and I'm not really into the bar scene (or any scene for that matter) so its kinda hard for me to find someone. I found a hot guy and I'm thinking about hiring him when I'm in Portugal next month. Any suggestions or comments?
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Thinking about Hiring a rentboy
- Thread starter rjst17
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altlover85
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Have you thought about going online?
youngnihilist
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Sure, why not? I can't think of one reason why you shouldn't go ahead with it.
Just_Believe18
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Find a guy who likes you for who you are and not for your wallet.
hylas
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just do it!
I had a very religious catholic upbringing. It has taken me a long time to come out to myself and identify myself as gay and accept it. I am still very closeted as well and I don't know the first thing to do to come out or the way things work in gay relationships.
mbamike
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Why rent a guy when you can get one for free? There are lots of guy who want no-strings-attached sex. Just look on a gay hookup site and you'll find plenty. I use Manhunt and Adam4Adam myself. I am meeting some great guys and having some unbelievable great sex!
jdbadboy
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Yes but not during the actual transaction. Most rentboys don't go on murderous crime sprees.
jdbadboy
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I think you should do it. It might help you overcome a hurdle and get on with the rest of your life. You might think about seeing a gay or gay affirmative therapist who can help you with whatever is keeping you back from relationships.
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Thanks for answering the question honestly.
The decision for you to make is whether to "get it over with" or whether to go through the process of dating, finding someone you're compatible with and give it a go.
If you do want to stick with the "get it over with" strategy, you can hire a rent-boy or just have a one night stand. The rent-boy is a sure thing and will set you back a few hundred dollars (or whatever the going rate is in Portugal). The other option is not a sure thing and of course, that brings in the possibility of it not going as well as it would be with someone that you're paying.
Eventually though, you will still have the whole dating thing to deal with.
Either way, don't sell yourself short. Do things to make you feel better about yourself and to build your self-confidence. And then get out there and meet people. Dating is a learning process and no one ever get it right the first few times around. You're still young though and you are at an age where many of the guys are looking to settle down and be serious and that's a good thing.
No matter what your decision is, be careful and be safe.
This is probably my fate. I'm so sexually incompetent that nobody would ever sleep with me voluntarily. So, when I have enough money (going to grad school, so it'll probably be when I'm about 30) I'm going to pay someone, just to see what it's like. If it's good, I guess I'll try harder to learn the little sequence of behaviors and recognitions you need to hook up successfully. If not, then I'll just forget it for the rest of my life.
It's a shame you're not getting any good advice, though because I could use it. Is there any way to find someone trustworthy or established, and good at "educational" sex?
It's a shame you're not getting any good advice, though because I could use it. Is there any way to find someone trustworthy or established, and good at "educational" sex?
altlover85
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iiiset, you're probably no worse than the majority of virgins. I wouldn't pay for it unless you have to.
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^^QFT. As long as you're up front about it, most guys are going to be patient. Everyone remembers what their first time was like (assuming that they were sober enough to remember).
youngnihilist
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I can only see positive reasons why he'd pay for his first.
Particularly people who may be socially awkward, uncomfortable in their skin or with their sexuality, have waited too long, don't have self confidence - hiring an escort is a perfect way to get started. The escort can ease you into the first session (THAT IS, IF THEY ARE GOOD), teach you, be patient with you, and get you comfortable in your body.
Now, I wouldn't advise making it a habit afterward unless you have tons of money, but it's a good way to get started if you have the above qualities, which it appears you have described yourself as possessing.
Particularly people who may be socially awkward, uncomfortable in their skin or with their sexuality, have waited too long, don't have self confidence - hiring an escort is a perfect way to get started. The escort can ease you into the first session (THAT IS, IF THEY ARE GOOD), teach you, be patient with you, and get you comfortable in your body.
Now, I wouldn't advise making it a habit afterward unless you have tons of money, but it's a good way to get started if you have the above qualities, which it appears you have described yourself as possessing.
Lube
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Well, I've got most guys here beat, as I was a gay virgin until I was 43 years old. 
Yes, pathetic, isn't it?
So, use a rent boy if it'll make you feel better, but no one I had sex with had any problem with me being a virgin. Or maybe because I had years of experience with women, I wasn't a total virgin, just a gay virgin?
Whatever. I found sex easily online. Yes, there are some very weird people out there (not weird sexual practices--I have no problem with that--but weird social, or should I say antisocial, skills). Some guys will get off and then "Oops, have an emergency, gotta go!" before you get off.
But, hey, that happens whether you're gay or straight, virgin or experienced. It's just that the more experience you have, the easier it is to detect their bullshit.
So go with a rentboy if you must. Just realize it's not the only way to go.
Good luck!
And report back.
Yes, pathetic, isn't it?
So, use a rent boy if it'll make you feel better, but no one I had sex with had any problem with me being a virgin. Or maybe because I had years of experience with women, I wasn't a total virgin, just a gay virgin?
Whatever. I found sex easily online. Yes, there are some very weird people out there (not weird sexual practices--I have no problem with that--but weird social, or should I say antisocial, skills). Some guys will get off and then "Oops, have an emergency, gotta go!" before you get off.
But, hey, that happens whether you're gay or straight, virgin or experienced. It's just that the more experience you have, the easier it is to detect their bullshit.
So go with a rentboy if you must. Just realize it's not the only way to go.
Good luck!
And report back.
altlover85
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HIV - since 12-09-09? I would be a little bothered by that seeing as how today is 10-31-10. Is it normal for an escort to only be tested once a year?
Just_Believe18
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^ Great observation, altlover.
A prostitute who is advertising their services and boasts a negative test from a year ago is not someone you should be considering.
Think of it this way:
Say you have sex with the prostitute for one night; what are you expecting afterwards? Do you feel like your first sexual experience will automatically make you a confident and knowledgable lover? If you are this insecure about expressing yourself sexually towards other men, how do you expect to feel any different afterwards?
A prostitute who is advertising their services and boasts a negative test from a year ago is not someone you should be considering.
Think of it this way:
Say you have sex with the prostitute for one night; what are you expecting afterwards? Do you feel like your first sexual experience will automatically make you a confident and knowledgable lover? If you are this insecure about expressing yourself sexually towards other men, how do you expect to feel any different afterwards?
