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Thinking of becoming a Dominator
Comrad

Comrad

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This thought has been in the back of my mind for about three years now. I personally am not into wearing leather day in and out . But being a Dominator seems to really suit me. I really like the idea about just beating the fuck out of someone, and getting paid to do it.. The whole thing revolves around power and humiliating someone. I can be so nasty and i think i can do this. However, im just really confused as to how i would go about getting into this.

Sure it sounds freaky, but my moms ok (not really ok but she wouldn't get angry) with the idea and i actually have a female friend that wants to work with me.
You know as a duo team, i can be a Dominator and she Dominatrix.
What do you think ?
Fuck how much would i charge by the hour ?
Better yet, what the fuck do i do when i run out of ideas ? :cowboy::cowboy::cowboy:
 
If you aren't quite sure what you should do, maybe you shouldn't!
 
Comrad said:
This thought has been in the back of my mind for about three years now. I personally am not into wearing leather day in and out . But being a Dominator seems to really suit me. I really like the idea about just beating the fuck out of someone, and getting paid to do it.. The whole thing revolves around power and humiliating someone. I can be so nasty and i think i can do this. However, im just really confused as to how i would go about getting into this.

Sure it sounds freaky, but my moms ok (not really ok but she wouldn't get angry) with the idea and i actually have a female friend that wants to work with me.
You know as a duo team, i can be a Dominator and she Dominatrix.
What do you think ?
Fuck how much would i charge by the hour ?
Better yet, what the fuck do i do when i run out of ideas ? :cowboy::cowboy::cowboy:
Click to expand...

Based on your "qualifications," I'd say you should not be a Dom. It's not about power and humiliation, but about helping your clients to find the proper outlet for their fetishes and desires. A true Dom/sub relationship should evolve out of mutual respect and a common need to experience something beyond a financial transaction. Doms that are in it for the money rarely last.

A good Dom must be professional, responsible and safe. Are you any of these things?
 
I just can't get over the fact that you've discussed doing this for a living with your own mother. :eek:
 
Pushyourluck said:
I just can't get over the fact that you've discussed doing this for a living with your own mother. :eek:
Click to expand...
Heh, I was a bit perplex too when I read this.

But anyway, I think either you've developed a dominating character over time or you haven't. I doubt it's something one can just do because he feels like it right now.
 
Masochist: "Hit Me"

Sadist: "No"
 
I think there needs to be a distinction made here before people completely lose the plot.

being a dominator/dominatrix is NOT about abusing anyone! and "wearing leather day in and out" is stereotypical, you dont have to be a leatherhead to be in a dom/sub relationship.
I cant say I have in depth knowledge of it but the basis of it I believe is trust.

a sub is not someone who "likes to get fuck beaten out of them and humilated"

I believe it is someone who feels the need to give control to someone else, if only temporarily, and they have completely trust the dom to not harm them more than has been ask and care for them properly afterwards.

OP if you think being a dominator is simply being paid to beat and humilate someone then NO, you would NOT make a good dominator

if you are serious then I suggest you visit some sites or clubs and actually talk to people who are doms/subs and learn about what it actually means, its a life choice not a career move
 
Gotta agree with the others here . . . the relationship between a dom and sub (even if it's only a 1 time thing) is a collaboration, not a one-sided thing at all. Being a skillful erotic sadist is not at all the same as being an abusive thug (which, frankly, is how you came across in your post, IMO).

It's an art, and it's not about you. It's about the art.
 
sinfulsimon said:
Based on your "qualifications," I'd say you should not be a Dom. It's not about power and humiliation, but about helping your clients to find the proper outlet for their fetishes and desires. A true Dom/sub relationship should evolve out of mutual respect and a common need to experience something beyond a financial transaction. Doms that are in it for the money rarely last.

A good Dom must be professional, responsible and safe. Are you any of these things?
Click to expand...

No im not.

God damn i don't know what it is, maybe its when you get old like you guys but people just have a certain way on draining the fun out of "fun" ideas. Jesus!
 
Comrad said:
No im not.

God damn i don't know what it is, maybe its when you get old like you guys but people just have a certain way on draining the fun out of "fun" ideas. Jesus!
Click to expand...

I'm hardly old... I'm only 4 years older than you. But I have worked as a professional Dominant and one of my exes (and close friends) continues to work in the biz. It's a difficult job, rewarding and fun at times, but difficult all the same.
 
Comrad no one is trying to "suck the fun out of a fun idea".....sure, to you its just a fun idea you wanna try but for many people its more than that, they are simply trying to help you understand what is actually involved so that if you do decided to go ahead with it you know how to do it safely and with respect for the sub.

why dont you take a look at these and it will give you more information (since you said your not sure what it actually involves) and it might make it easier to make an informed decision

http://www.xeromag.com/fvbdwanttobedom.html
http://en.allexperts.com/q/BDSM-2733/becoming-dom.htm
http://www.steel-door.com/Dominant_Drop.html
http://www.domsub.info/ <<<<this one has several links to other sites that might also prove useful :)
 
My advice to you is: cool your tone. Don't use terms like "beat the fuck out of someone." It really goes off badly. I love dom/sub adult role-play games, but it has to be done AS A GAME. I have played on both sides of the fence. When you play these games, you are living in a world of fantasy - you need to operate in an atmosphere of mutual consent, and only with adults.

Cool off, and tone it down. You sound outright violent, and this is the last thing you want. Keep the stuff on the internet (and in real life) friendly; make it clear that sub-dom games are only for fun, and are acted out by consenting adults who derive mutual pleasure.

Take my advice and cool off.
 
You know, I do not see that much wrong with what Comrad said in his first post (though I am a little shocked that he talked about it with his mother - but that is his choice and his relationship with his mother).

Frequently, a big part of Dom/sub is the threat of what many would call "violence." I have had "the fuck beaten out of me" to paraphrase Comrad. My ass has been beaten so badly that it was bruised and it was uncomfortable to sit down. I have had cock so torqued, pulled and weighted that it was bruised. My nipples have been sore and bruised. One Dom used me as target practice while he learned how to handle his bull whip (just imagine the marks and pain that caused). I think that equates well with the idea of "beating the fuck out of some one."

While this is not for everyone, and not a part of every Dom/sub relationship it is what I did. It is also a part of what many in "the life" do. When my Dom with the bullwhip called to tell me about the new whip, I knew, given the nature of our relationship, just what I was going to do to please him. It was within our limits.

My guess is that if Comrad posted his profile, with pics of himself on certain websites, that his email box would be full by the end of the day - with both young and old, experienced and inexperienced clients/players. I am sure that Comrad has the sense to not take his interests passed past where his clients, sexual partners and others want it to go.

Comrad has the fantasy of Dominating other men - not that big of a deal. I think that some are shocked at his choice of words. If he needs practice... sign me up!
 
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