Thread of Nonsensical Ramblings

[Lefty]

No Reffie, the only person that can OWN you is YOU.
Not an easy task for any of us to learn by any means.

Had no intention of giving you anything but a positive boost.

Johann is a bit of a know it all gas bag (kinda like me) but if

he sees enough in you to extend his hand...well, he is also

a man of intelligence and experience. Take what you can use

but use what you take applies.

 

[refujiunderground]

No Reffie, the only person that can OWN you is YOU.
Not an easy task for any of us to learn by any means.

Had no intention of giving you anything but a positive boost.

Johann is a bit of a know it all gas bag (kinda like me) but if

he sees enough in you to extend his hand...well, he is also

a man of intelligence and experience. Take what you can use

but use what you take applies.

i know you meant well with what you said. it's that criticism and being told the truth is hard for me to take. i get defense because i have an ego or put a shield up where i don't like to be told that i'm wrong or need to improve myself. i kind of grew that being that i have low self esteem and confidence. i just view it as "damn, this person is just talking shit about me" when the person is actually trying to reach out and help me for my own good. that would be me basically being ignorant and stupid to deny help when i actually need and want the help. it's like a drug addict that wants to stop using and then when they get someone that is willing to help them, they look at them as the enemy.

and yeah, the only person that can own me is me.

the only problem is right now i'm on what you might say is a road block of some sort. i know what i have to do BUT i don't want to do it mainly because of fear. metaphorically speaking, it's almost like i know i have to get up off my chair at some point and getting up means to move forward and handle my business but i don't want to. i can tell you all the excuses. there's fear. there's basically finding myself alone. there's lack of confidence in myself. it's also because i guess i'm afraid of success or i guess doing well. i don't know. i don't know if it's an inferiority complex or whatever. i just don't want to be the person in the spotlight where everybody sees me or whatever. i'm comfortable being in a corner basically hidden away from everybody or whether a certain comfort zone where i can basically hide in my shell away from people. i also feel that people don't get me where i just don't fit in or don't have what normal people have (i guess you can branch that under inferiority complex). i don't mean to turn this into a "woe is me" thing. i apologize if i sound like it BUT geez, to be honest with you, i wouldn't mind being locked away in my room, away from the world, basically living on my own, not coming in contact with anybody and etc because people worry me.

 

[refujiunderground]

http://www.justusboys.com/forum/hot-topics/386504-can-you-deal-with-a-bad-kisser.html

i was itching to say as a response to this thread was to "tell him to kiss your ass. he can't go wrong with that." didn't want to say it because i was afraid someone might take it the wrong way.

 

[Lefty]

Stop that shit young man.
Hiding under rocks is for trolls.
When you were 5 maybe some shit soured your ass.
Maybe until even yesterday, shit came down that way.

I don't know enough of that clinical shit to layout shrink rap.
There are tons of people out there in the REAL world and here
in JUBberville that had it a lot tougher than you or me could ever imagine.

No apologies are aacceptable, that is unless by you making an effort to grow
and develop is a proactive apology. Do you think you are the only person in
your life that has feelings and sensitivities. The only person that has some
insecurities and strong negative thoughts?

Don't be a silly twat. Life is a fucking Rodeo junior. You draw your card you get
your horse and you ride til you get bucked off. Bruised balls and a sore ass from
taking that 10 second ride. But, you get back up dust your self off and head back
for another ticket and the ride.

Look over to your left, there in the chute some dumb bastard is going to try and
ride a big pissed bull.

Okay cowpoke...

that fucking bronco sure ain't quite as tough looking as that bull looked...



Ride baby ride...

It hurts so good...so fucking good.
Everybody falls off that's actually part of the fun.
It's like when you come so hard your nuts ache but,
doesn't stop you from coming again does it.

 

[Lefty]

The scariest face, I have ever seen.

Oh my god, she was my date at the junior prom....okay okay, she was desperate at the last minute.

 

[JOHN B]

^^^..OMG...........that haircut looks awful on her! :/

 

[refujiunderground]

Stop that shit young man.
Hiding under rocks is for trolls.
When you were 5 maybe some shit soured your ass.
Maybe until even yesterday, shit came down that way.

I don't know enough of that clinical shit to layout shrink rap.
There are tons of people out there in the REAL world and here
in JUBberville that had it a lot tougher than you or me could ever imagine.

No apologies are aacceptable, that is unless by you making an effort to grow
and develop is a proactive apology. Do you think you are the only person in
your life that has feelings and sensitivities. The only person that has some
insecurities and strong negative thoughts?

Don't be a silly twat. Life is a fucking Rodeo junior. You draw your card you get
your horse and you ride til you get bucked off. Bruised balls and a sore ass from
taking that 10 second ride. But, you get back up dust your self off and head back
for another ticket and the ride.

Look over to your left, there in the chute some dumb bastard is going to try and
ride a big pissed bull.

Okay cowpoke...

that fucking bronco sure ain't quite as tough looking as that bull looked...



Ride baby ride...

It hurts so good...so fucking good.
Everybody falls off that's actually part of the fun.
It's like when you come so hard your nuts ache but,
doesn't stop you from coming again does it.

i get what you're saying but i have to stop you right there when you mentioned the thing in bold.

I'M NOT THEM SO WHAT IS THE POINT OF MENTIONING THEM AND WHAT THEY WENT THROUGH. is that supposed to make me feel bad for feeling sad or angry or something or change how i'm feeling or whatever that someone has it worse than me or whatever? that doesn't change shit. i'm not looking for pity or sympathy because it does NOTHING. it's not going to get me to help myself. i'm LEARNING to deal with myself and yeah, over time, i'm slowly getting to understand and accept things a bit more even if i don't want to. the problem is it's not happening fast enough.

i'm sick and hearing of people mention about so and so having it worse than me or whatever else. yeah and what's your point? do you think that matters if someone is feeling lousy or shitty or change THEM? they don't want to hear about john doe getting robbed or not having a christmas because that's not changing how they feel or where their head is at.

 

[refujiunderground]

but enough of this shit though. time to watch some jay-z clips.

 

[refujiunderground]

and now for our masterpiece theater, when pau gasol attacks.

pau gasol and family hanging out with alvin hall.

pau gasol talking to some fans.

kevin hart run in with pau gasol.

pau gasol while chilling in his hood in spain.

pau gasol goes after rapper consequence aka mr. ed

(look at the resemblence) who ends up dropping child while trying to flee pau gasol's wrath.

 

[Lefty]

From Ref's post 557.

I'M NOT THEM SO WHAT IS THE POINT OF MENTIONING THEM AND WHAT THEY WENT THROUGH. is that supposed to make me feel bad for feeling sad or angry or something or change how i'm feeling or whatever that someone has it worse than me or whatever? that doesn't change shit. i'm not looking for pity or sympathy because it does NOTHING. it's not going to get me to help myself. i'm LEARNING to deal with myself and yeah, over time, i'm slowly getting to understand and accept things a bit more even if i don't want to. the problem is it's not happening fast enough.

i'm sick and hearing of people mention about so and so having it worse than me or whatever else. yeah and what's your point? do you think that matters if someone is feeling lousy or shitty or change THEM? they don't want to hear about john doe getting robbed or not having a christmas because that's not changing how they feel or where their head is at.

.
======================================
You have the audacity to ask whats the point? The temerity to say/state/swear or aver "refujiunderground" is the center of the universe and all inhabitants owe him? You are sick of people telling you that in some ways you got things pretty Jake and can't see how them repeating that shit is supposed to change you or make you happy.

No, they don't tell you about that shit to stuff your fucking self centered little ego fuller, they mention that shit hoping you might be able to put it all together and apply a little perspective to your mental condition not rag on you your highness.

Sorry Charlie, you can't reap what you don't sow. I'm still not writing you off as a troll as have several people. But, my final comment might give you a moments pause and get some brain cells working.

If a man lets his fertile fields lie fallow long enough, he will starve.
I tried but now realise you don't want help, you crave dissention
Best of Luck

 

[refujiunderground]

From Ref's post 557.
.
======================================
You have the audacity to ask whats the point? The temerity to say/state/swear or aver "refujiunderground" is the center of the universe and all inhabitants owe him? You are sick of people telling you that in some ways you got things pretty Jake and can't see how them repeating that shit is supposed to change you or make you happy.

my dude. i'm well aware that i'm NOT the center of the universe. trust me, dude. for the most part, i sure don't treat myself like i am either. in fact, i tend to worry more about other people than i worry about myself. we all have problems. i'm trying to LEARN how to be happy more often and to not let my problems bother me so much and at the same time, deal with them. that's all. nothing complicated. in recent times, i've actually been looking a lot more into myself because i realize that i'm digging myself further into a hole worrying and caring about everything else except myself. yeah, i may talk a lot about myself on here BUT trust me, what i'm doing is venting. it doesn't translate to what i'm actually doing for myself, bro.

No, they don't tell you about that shit to stuff your fucking self centered little ego fuller, they mention that shit hoping you might be able to put it all together and apply a little perspective to your mental condition not rag on you your highness.

that's what i'm trying to do. once again, how am i self centered, bro?

Sorry Charlie, you can't reap what you don't sow. I'm still not writing you off as a troll as have several people. But, my final comment might give you a moments pause and get some brain cells working.


If a man lets his fertile fields lie fallow long enough, he will starve.
I tried but now realise you don't want help, you crave dissention
Best of Luck

fuck everybody outthere that thinks i'm a troll and another thing, besides me keeping it positive and being able to pull my ass up to help my own self out. what do you want out of me?

 

[Lefty]

Simple answer there man. I want you to achieve your desired potentials and help others do the same.

I want your wit and humour to show through here and you having a good time doing so...
I want you to learn and teach and experience sincere camaraderie not just dialogue.

But, it isn't what I myself or others want OUT of you, its' what you want out of you. Okay,
poor Ronnie needs his thread back and my friend Camus just reminded me that I have other
more sisyphean tasks to perform, so, sadly

my break

is over...

 

[refujiunderground]

Simple answer there man. I want you to achieve your desired potentials and help others do the same.

I want your wit and humour to show through here and you having a good time doing so...
I want you to learn and teach and experience sincere camaraderie not just dialogue.

But, it isn't what I myself or others want OUT of you, its' what you want out of you. Okay,
poor Ronnie needs his thread back and my friend Camus just reminded me that I have other
more sisyphean tasks to perform, so, sadly

my break

is over...

well, the thread is about nonsensical ramblings so i think we're safe.

see, that's my problem. when i read that to myself, in my head i was like, "i'm actually witty and funny? i don't think that i'm that nor do i feel like i'm smart or funny." that's my problem. i don't believe in myself. even when i walk around amongst people at somewhere like the gym for example, i'm so self conscious and insecure with myself that i'm actually scared that someone will make fun of me for how i look or the way i walk or point out something that i'm real insecure about. my hearing is on tone or i'm looking around to see if anybody is noticing me, pointing their finger and laughing at me or if i overhear anybody basically talking about me walking funny or weird. you know, a lot of the things that i'm insecure about is because in the past, as a kid, people would point things out and would ridicule me on it. i was basically told that there was "something wrong with me" by others and i eventually believed that shit. it's still hard to snap out of that mindset though especially when i look for signs of confirmation by the way people act such as them looking at me strange or how they act around me.

among the things that i've grown self conscious about is my facial expressions because i'm not aware that i may be making up my face and people point them out and either diss the hell out of me for it. another one as i've mentioned is my walk. my teachers back in middle school and junior high would basically call me out on it in front of the classroom like "why are you walking like that? stand up straight. quit walking like you're retarded." at the time, i had slipped from being on the honor roll and wasn't getting as much attention and praise from my teachers as i used to get plus i was having other issues. that just made me feel even worse. they may think they were helping out but they were fucking up my self esteem and confidence which was fading away at the time. i pretty much started to give up on myself and that's what happened. since i couldn't shine academically or in other areas, i turned to things that i thought i could succeed in and eventually, i started to look at the wrong type of things to basically boost up my self esteem. i wanted to be a rapper and i also was looking into getting involved in the streets so i can get respect and praise from other people since that was the thing at the time.

you know, to make a long story short, i pretty much still am trying to figure out how the hell to get myself to believe in myself where i'm no longer this insecure nutjob which feels the need to diss people and etc because i'm or with myself. the main problem is basically loving myself which is why i honestly thinking about staying away from people because i don't want to butting heads with people that don't understand where my head is at.

 

[Lefty]

Ref, give it a few then see your p/ms.

These people don't need our nattering

I get pretty windy at times...OK the

rest of you, go find the Dainty Dangler

(aka RonR18) and drag him back here

to JUBberville. he has a room at the

Hotel California

[video]http://video.search.yahoo.com/video/play;_ylt=A0S00MizF2JQdDcA1gr8w8QF;_ylu=X3oDMTB1a3 ZwNWRpBHNlYwNjZC1zcgRzbGsDdmlkLXNlYXJjaAR2dGlkAw--?c=3&l=6%3A24&p=hotel%20california%20lyrics&rurl=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.youtube.com%2Fwatch%3Fv%3DNU bTW928sMU&sigr=11akm40ei&tit=The%20Eagles%20-%20Hotel%20California%20(with%20Lyrics%20in%20the% 20Description)&turl=http%3A%2F%2Fts4.mm.bing.net%2Fvideos%2Fthumb nail.aspx%3Fq%3D4765838184349711%26id%3D8b6ad05fe3 7331ea07a6d2d2f53a98ff%26bid%3DWtkaNEBa3HXnfQ%26bn %3DLargeThumb%26url%3Dhttp%253a%252f%252fwww.youtu be.com%252fwatch%253fv%253dNUbTW928sMU&vid=7DE775DC5A40341AD95A7DE775DC5A40341AD95A[/video]

 

[refujiunderground]

That ship had sailed dear.

 

[Lefty]

Seth,
People used to say stuff like that about you... remember?
People even went so far as to try to get you banned... remember?
Some people stuck up for the filth Kid and even if they didn't like
some of his stuff, backed him...remember?

Lets give reffie that kind of a chance...okay, he fallen down and scraped
his knees (maybe other stuff too) maybe he wouldn't muddy the waters in
quite as 'vile' a matter if we didn't kick his ass into the mud so much.

We're not Israel and he's not Iran. Now, play nice or I'll tell 'pops' and
assign you to him for a week of intensive bonding.

 

[Lefty]

To keep her from getting to you,

are you going to tell her you have an incurable social disease?

Lock yourself in the bath every night?

Tell he you are an anmal lover and into sheep,

then bring one home?

 

[refujiunderground]

this video is sooooooooo dope. so addictive.


@ the noises they're making especially the one that gets attacked and bitten off of the tree. for some reason, people say they sound demonic. i don't get it. it sounds funny. the bear at the top sounds like the wife from all in the family with that nagging, annoying voice in panic mode. how could you be scared of that? @ the noises they make at the end too. i would want one of these as a pet.

 

[refujiunderground]

I want to create a thread to verify the having sex with a horse is legal in 23 states, and gay marriage is legal in 6, but I really don't think it's appropriate and edited at the last minute.

someone actually made a thread or said something like that before awhile ago. don't remember exactly but i know i heard it though.

 

[refujiunderground]

i fucking love this show. it's brilliant. watching this shit makes me want to be a lawyer for real.