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Thursdays: A Sims 3 Graphic Novel RETURNS

Second Semester
Chapter Eighteen Part Two: In The Evening


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Elated from what I just experienced, I started my car and made my way home from the gym….Despite finally getting the opportunity to make love to the man of my dreams, there was still a single bump in the road….My parents. I didn’t want to tell them right away that I am going to spend the night sexually involved with another man….So I needed to think up of an excuse…and FAST!

Ryan: “Okay…..I need to think of something that Mom or Dad would believe……..I GOT IT. “Okay, Mom? I need to go over a friend’s house to help him with his English project and I might sleep over.” That should work…..”

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I arrived home at approximately 4:30 in the afternoon to find Mom and Dad about to cook dinner….Before they put a plate for me on the dining room table, I needed to tell them what my…Well, quote-unquote “plans” were.

Ryan: “Hey Mom, I just want to let you know that I’m not going to be home for dinner.”
Melinda: “Oh? Why is that?”
Ryan: “Well you see, My friend Jonathan from my English class who is desperate for help with is project, so I decided to lend him a hand….And also, I’ll probably be sleeping over his house.”

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After I told my bullshit story, Mom and Dad both looked at each other and smiled….

Robert: “Wow, how about that…both of our kids are having sleepovers on one night….
Ryan: “Wait, both?!”
Melinda: “Ryan, you didn’t notice? Denise isn’t here! Today’s the day of her sleepover party over her friend Lily’s house! She was home for a little bit more than an hour, but because you were out, you didn’t notice her leave.
Ryan: “OH! How could I have forgotten, God she was talking about that party for five days straight!”

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Robert: “Anyway, you can go to wherever you need to go….On ONE condition though. Both Mom and I are working tomorrow so it wouldn’t be too much trouble for you to pick up Denise in your travels tomorrow morning?"
Ryan: “That’s not a problem at all!”
Robert: “Good, let me text you the address to Lily’s house…Lily doesn’t live that far from us, only about five minutes away.”

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After receiving the address from my Dad and programming a reminder to pick her up on my phone, I figured it was time for me to hit the road….Before leaving, Mom and Dad did give me the usual “have fun, be safe” spiel….I don’t really need to hear that every I go out someplace….By now, they should be aware that I do follow my better judgment.

After finding Logan’s address in my text messages, I programmed it into my GPS, and set off.

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The route had taken me all the way through southern Sunset Valley, which allowed me to enjoy looking at the different kinds of mansions and large houses which dotted Redwood Lane and Sunnyvale Boulevard in amazement and awe.

Ryan: “Wow! That one looks like it came right from the Roaring 20s! And that modern style one over there looks so fuckin’ awesome! That one’s a little smaller, but it has a swimming pool that goes all the way to the front of the house! And that portion of the house acts as a bridge!! Now THAT is just too cool.”

Despite me saying before that southern Sunset Valley was the rich area of Sunset Valley, I’d like to clarify something. Southern Sunset Valley is home to people who's net worth only just breaks a million bucks, maybe a little more, maybe a little less. So in reality, it’s more of an upper middle class to mildly rich area…Now Sunset Heights? THAT is the REAL wealthy area. That’s where the massive, 40 plus room castles are, that’s where the golf courses, country clubs, and polo grounds are….People who live in Sunset Heights are usually worth a good 300 to 400 million dollars, so it’s truly where the BIG money is……....It’s also where the old money is. Southern Sunset Valley is predominately new money.

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My GPS urged me to keep driving up Sunnyvale Boulevard, passing by three mini mansions….Obviously none of those houses were Logan’s house...Suddenly it dawned on me, I was being lead to the “Cliffside Mansion”, as I nicknamed it….I’ve been aware of that beautiful house for a while now. Rumor had it that whoever owns that house also owns that entire little peninsula of land which includes a small ocean inlet, meaning that you can literally have a day at the beach and not leave your own property! If the address Logan gave me is correct, then there is no other explanation….Logan lives in that mansion....God, if someone would have told me that even a half-hour ago, I would have said “Yeah and I’m Alexander The Great. BULLSHIT.”

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I drove up to the front of the Cliffside Mansion and pulled into the house’s large driveway...I exited my car and took a deep breath….I was here, there was no turning back now….

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I swiftly and eagerly walked up to the front door, rang the doorbell a few times and waited….Ten seconds had passed…then twenty….and then thirty. After forty seconds had passed, I began to wonder if I should ring the doorbell a second time….

Ryan: “God, he better be home…Hell, this better actually be his house!”

Just as I was about to think about ringing the bell a second time….the front door swung open….And standing right before me was Logan, wearing a sexy outfit consisting of the same tight dress shirt and the same tight khakis he knew I liked….There really wasn’t any doubt at this point that this was certainly his house…

Logan: “Ryan! I knew you’d show up sooner or later! It’s so nice to see you again! Please, come inside! I’ll give you the grand tour!”

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I followed Logan inside his house and instantly, I felt a surge of amazement course through my body. This guy really made a pretty nice living for himself....Everything in his house was just…immaculate. Everything looked modern, new, fresh...This is exactly what people think of when they picture a “modern-style mansion” in their heads.

Logan: “Can I get you something to drink, a soda perhaps?”
Ryan: “No, I’m good for now.”
Logan: “So, let me show you around….this is the foyer…Nothing really special, a few potted plants here and there…Follow me, I’ll show you more interesting parts of my home."

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Logan: “This is my home office, it’s where I do stuff on the computer…”
Ryan: “Gee, I wonder what kind of “stuff” you’re doing on that computer…”
Logan: “Oh, you know…..but however, it’s not ALL fun and games…I do some serious stuff as well in this room like pay bills, do taxes, work on things for my jobs…”

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Logan: “Over here is the kitchen/dining area…I don’t like to brag at all, but let’s just say I can hold my own in the kitchen!”
Ryan: “You cook?”
Logan: “Well, it is a good skill to have especially if you’re living alone, you know what I mean? Anyway, according to members of my family, I can be pretty killer at barbecue foods! According to my mother, you haven’t lived until you’ve tasted my Philly cheesesteak sandwiches and my blue cheese and bacon Angus burgers!”

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Logan: “And over here, is the living room/den area…
Ryan: “Damn, this is the biggest living room I have ever fuckin’ seen...
Logan: “Thanks, Ryan! Anywhere, this is where my TV, stereo system, and bar is…It’s a great place to just kick back and relax, watch whatever’s on TV or whatever’s on Netflix..."

While Logan was showing me around his living room, I quickly glanced out the window…I assumed that after Logan was done showing me the interior of his home, he’d bring me to the exterior of his home, but I couldn’t help but feel a sensation of “déjà vu” when it comes to the outside of his home. I noticed that the swimming pool deck seemed very familiar, like I’ve seen this before somewhere….

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Logan: “This room right here is one of the many guest bedrooms that I converted into a different type of room. I call this my “wardrobe room” It’s conveniently next to the downstairs bathroom, so I can just take a shower in that bathroom over there and get dressed in this room! I’ve divided each dresser into different clothing categories. That dresser on the right is for everyday clothes and workout clothes, the dresser over by that wall is for formal clothes. Suits, ties, the whole shebang. And this dresser is for swimwear, underwear, posing briefs for when I still competed in bodybuilding, intimate clothing…”
Ryan: “Damn…I’d like to see you try on some of those….
Logan: “In due time, Ryan….in due time.”
 
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Logan: “Now, if you’ll follow me upstairs….this large bedroom right here…is the master suite! Yep, this is my bedroom! Nice, isn’t it?
Ryan: “VERY nice and pretty comfortable looking.
Logan: “Heh, if you think the room looks comfortable, try laying on the bed!
Ryan: “Oh my GOD…this bed is so amazing…How can you wake up in the morning with a bed this perfectly comfortable?!”
Logan: “It ain’t easy, bro! I actually used to have a waterbed, but ever since it started to leak, I quickly switched to a springless memory foam mattress and I have not gone back since.”

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Logan: “And this room is a spare bedroom that I didn’t convert into anything else….so I basically left it as a spare bedroom...just in case I had any guests over that needed to stay the night.…Lets just say that I don’t think anyone has ever slept in this room in the eleven years I’ve owned this joint.”
Ryan: “…..It does get lonely in here, doesn’t it?
Logan: “I will not lie, it does at times….Anyway…moving on to more interesting things.”

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Logan led me outside to a massive, sprawling veranda, which gave an amazing view of the shoreline and the surrounding neighborhood. The deck was dotted with various objects such as a chess board, a painting easel, a few porch chairs, and a telescope…Strangely, I started to get the same feeling of Déjà vu that I had earlier when I noticed the pool deck….I’ve seen this house before, or a house that looked similar, I just couldn’t really point out when or where….

Logan: “So this is the veranda….Sometimes after a long day’s work, I like to just put on a pair of swim trunks and just…relax out here…”
Ryan: “Seems like I would do the same!”

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Logan: “And this is, right here, is the other spare bedroom that I converted into a different room! This is my very own gym.”

I froze right in my tracks after he introduced me to his private gym. I DID see this house before. This was the house in the gay porno video called “The Most Perfect Muscle Ass In The World” starring Black Stallion Studio’s own Matt Manchester..….My suspicions were now 100% confirmed. There was no longer any doubt about it. “Matt Manchester” was a pseudonym. Logan Hardwick and Matt Manchester are the same exact person….The shocking realization caused a wave of both shock and pleasure to come over me, the man I will soon be sexually involved with is one of the hottest gay porn stars on the internet, but there was still some unanswered questions…..How did he get into Black Stallion Studios? Why did he decide to do gay porn? Why does he label himself as straight if he’s really gay?

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He backtracked all the way downstairs and out the back door, with me following….I knew right away he was going to show me the pool deck.

Logan: “This is my pool and backyard....Instead of chlorine, my pool uses a form of heavy-duty disinfecting salt. It basically does ALL the jobs that chlorine does, but without the harshness of chlorine on your skin or on your hair….Anyway, that’s basically it…

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Ryan: “Logan, before we start doing any…fooling around, can I ask you something?
Logan: “Sure, anything!”
Ryan: “From one gay guy to another, I’d like to ask you a personal question….(God, I can’t believe I’m asking my former professor this) Do you watch…well, gay porn?”
Logan: “Yeah, I do occasionally. Why do you ask?”
Ryan: “Well, a few months ago last year, I discovered this porn star by the name of “Matt Manchester” after watching one of his videos. I though the video was one of the hottest things I’ve seen in a long time and I couldn’t get over how you and Matt Manchester look absolutely identical…and I’ve been wondering for quite a while now………Are you....him? Are you Matt Manchester?"

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Logan sighed and glanced away from me…I could tell that my question made him slightly nervous…

Logan: “Ryan….If I tell you the answer to that question, will you PROMISE me that you will keep this between the two of us?”
Ryan: “Of course I will….”
Logan: “Yes. I am Matt Manchester. I’ve been a Black Stallion Studios model since 2009…..Despite the fact that the year prior, I had finally become a certified psychology and sociology professor, I felt like I needed some extra income to keep this house up and running…I also wanted to relive the glory days of being a professional bodybuilder. Heh, I remember submitting a picture of me wearing nothing but one of my old posing briefs from my bodybuilding days, Silas Muller didn’t even have to meet me in person, he just looked at that picture and said that I got the job…..”
Ryan: “Who’s Silas Muller?”
Logan: “The founder of Black Stallion Studios, he lives not too far from here in a gorgeous mansion not too far from here with multiple models. The male models that live and work in his mansion are known as “Black Stallion Butlers” and they’re essentially the gay equivalent of the Playboy Bunnies.”
Ryan: “So this guy, Silas is essentially the gay Hugh Hefner....”
Logan: “On the money. After I revealed that I was a professor and teaching at Sunset Valley Community College, he was the one who told me I should change my name for videos to protect my reputation….And he also said that I should play the role as a straight guy doing gay porn; for a completely different reason, though. His reasoning for that is to keep gay guys fantasizing about being able to get with a straight dude….Ryan, you know a secret that I have never told anyone else outside of the Black Stallion Studios world and my own family…the ONLY reason why I told you this is because….I trust you. For the love of God, PLEASE don’t make me regret telling you.”
Ryan: “Logan…I promise to God, I will never tell anyone else. This is between us and us only. You can trust me….”

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Logan and I stood there, staring into each other’s eyes for approximately ten seconds, silently debating on who would make the very first move….Suddenly, Logan grabbed me violently by my shirt, and pulled me into what I have literally dreamed about for months….Our lips collided in a passionate, loving, and long kiss. I caressed Logan’s muscular back as he ran his fingers through my short, light brown hair….No one was around to put on a display for as we made out. On the secluded cliffside mansion, it was truly….just us.

Ryan: “Logan I…..just have to have you...”
Logan: “Where do you want to do it? It’s your choice….”
Ryan: “I want this night to be something special for both of us…..So I propose that we fuck on the veranda, outdoors.”
Logan: “So you’re into outdoor sex? I really do admire your desire to live on the edge…”

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I led Logan back inside the house and out through the side door to the veranda….There, we made out once again…I took off his tight, black dress shirt, revealing his beautifully sculpted upper body…I began to play with his nipples as we started making out again…..
 
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I then removed every last inch of my clothes, save for something special that I’ve been saving for a special occasion….Before I left my house, I changed out of my boxers and into a sky-blue bikini brief I had ordered online months ago….Originally, I was going to wear then one day for Mark De Luca, but seeing as how our relationship ended before it could get to that point, this is the first time I ever wore them.

Logan: “Damn, that looks fucking great on you. Look at the size of that fuckin’ package, man!”
Ryan: “Thanks Logan…But I gotta say, that speedo you wore earlier today was sexy as hell!"
Logan: "I'm still wearing it under my clothes....you wanna see?"
Ryan: "I believe you already know the answer!"

Logan began to slowly unbutton his tight khakis....and slowly began to pull them down…..revealing the familiar violet and blue spandex…

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Without taking a moment to think about it, I grabbed hold of his large bulge and massaged his gigantic balls…By the way his member was stiffening in my hand, I could tell he enjoyed my actions…

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I followed my instincts by pulling down his speedo, and finally engaging in the first sexual act between me and Logan…..I began to furiously give him the blowjob of the century, taking my long tongue and gently massaging his shaft…Logan’s sensual moaning combined with him playing with his nips indicated to me he enjoyed this immensely….Suddenly, he pulled out.

Logan: “On second thought, I don’t think you want this….”

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Logan quickly spun around, grabbed onto the railing, and bent over. Presenting his big, muscular ass to me…the ass that dominated my sexual fantasies since September of 2013…the ass that could stop traffic in Provincetown….That same ass was right there, in front of me, waiting to be rimmed and fucked by yours truly.

Logan: “You really want THIS, don’t ya!”
Ryan: “What can I say…You read my mind!”

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I sure as hell didn’t waste any time…I instantly buried my face in his ass cheeks, swabbing the inside of his ass cheeks with my tongue...Soon enough, my tongue began to probe at his opening, slowing working its way inside…As my tongue explored the inside, Logan began feverishly shake and flex his glutes, nearly crushing my face with his bubble butt as he clenched the cheeks together. At this point, I was so turned on that I thought my twelve-incher was going to rip my bikini brief in half.

Logan: “Yeah….eat that hole…..You like it when I do this? Yeah, you like it when I shake that fuckin’ ass.”

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I wanted the sensation of his beautiful ass in my face to last forever, however my personal heaven was cut short when Logan stood up straight, separating his bubble butt from my face.

Logan: “It’s getting pretty late…Lets head inside. We can go all the way in there.”

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After entering back inside and closing the door, we rushed straight to his bedroom….There, we engaged in yet another passionate make-out session…We broke off the kiss after a few seconds, seeing as how we were ready to take things to the next level…

Logan: “Take that bikini off, Ryan….I wanna see what you got!”
Ryan: “Alright man, you better prepare yourself....because I guarantee that you're going to be blown away..”

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I grabbed the waistband of my bikini, and slowly pulled it down…..Man, you should have seen the look on Logan’s face when my underwear was around my knees and my 12 incher flopped out, I thought his eyes were going to pop out of his skull and explode…

Logan: “Ryan…..I…..Goddamn, there are no words in the English language that are fit enough to describe how fucking…enormous it is.
Ryan: “Well, all I can say is this, I’ve been blessed!”
Logan: “Hell yeah, you've been!”

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Ryan: “So….what’s the plan? What are we going to try first?”
Logan: “Heh…If you’re looking for a deep throat, fucking forget it. There is NO way in hell that I am going to be able to put that whole thing in my mouth.”
Ryan: “Don’t worry….I got other plans….”

I seductively walked over to his bed, and climbed on......down on my knees, I presented myself to him.

Ryan: “I’d like you to fuck me first.”
Logan: “Are you sure….by the way you were eating out my ass, I’d assume you wanted to top me before anything.”
Ryan: “Well, I thought, might as well save the best part for last…Now come on, get that condom on and give it to me…hard.”

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Logan climbed on the bed behind me…He leaned over and romantically kissed and licked the nape of my neck…In response, I pressed my ass against his hips…Beckoning the message "give me all you got" to him...

Logan: “Alright, if this hurts, let me know and I’ll stop immediately.”
Ryan: “Logan, I’ve bottomed before with dicks bigger than yours, Trust me, you won’t hurt me. I’ll be fine…”

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Logan equipped his member with a condom and K-Y….He hesitated for a bit before pressing the head of cock against my hole...with slight pelvic thrusts, he managed to work his way inside me.

Ryan: “Oh….FUCK YEAH! That feels good!"

Logan started off slow, sensual, and romantic...Leaning over and kissing back while fucking me….Over time, he increased the speed of his thrusts, until he was furiously ripping my asshole apart. His speech initially started out with soft, romantic whispers in my ear as he did me, but as his fucking became more and more intense, he slowly started to raise his voice until he unleashed his inner beast and began ROARING with a gravelly, intimidating, badass voice.

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Ryan: “Oh God…oh FUCK YEAH!!!!
Logan: “YEAH, YOU LIKE IT WHEN I FUCK THAT FUCKING HOLE, DON’T YA!!!! God…You better hold on tight Ryan, because I’m gonna come soon….”
Logan collapsed on my back, hugged my neck tightly, but not as tight as to choke me….With one final, violent thrust….He let out a demonic roar as I began to feel a slightly warm feeling in my ass….I successfully made him come.
Logan: “Grrrrrrrr……RRRRAAAAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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The full weight of Logan’s body fell onto mine as his now flaccid member exited my ass…We rolled over on the bed and began to cuddle…..

Logan: “Ryan…gimme a little review here, How did I do?”
Ryan: “Damn…I mean, your dick may be average, maybe even slightly below, but holy shit, you DO know how to use it!”
Logan: “Thanks Ryan, it really means a lot to hear that from you.”

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And then came the moment I was looking forward to the most…Logan had gotten up off the bed and climbed back on, crawling on all fours….He seductively flexed his glutes, just like he did when I rimmed him…He knew what I wanted, and I had the feeling he wanted it just as much…

Logan: “Ryan, now is the time….I want you to fuck me.”
Ryan: “I…..I don’t know, I want to fuck you, but I don’t want you to think I’m too large for you, I mean, You’re about 5-6 inches….I’m TWELVE inches, a whole fucking foot.
Logan: “Ryan, a few months ago while you were still in my History of Sociology class, I had a boyfriend who was about nine inches. If I could take that cock with no problem, then why can’t I do yours? What’s another three inches?”
Ryan: “Alright man….”

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I stood up in a kneeling position on the bed behind Logan, I massaged his bubble butt with my left hand while rubbing my dick with the right to kickstart another erection…I applied the condom and the lube to my twelve incher, and pressed it against Logan’s tight hole….Being mindful of my size, I didn’t force it all in at once, rather I tried the “slow injection method”…..I then worked the head inside, then another inch, then another inch…stopping at six inches, halfway through. Logan’s breathing intensified, indicating he was enjoying the experience very much…I then began to thrust in and out of him, only halfway inside, but with each movement…..I was slowly working my way deeper, and deeper inside him….with one big pelvic thrust, my entire twelve inches was inside him.

Logan: “ARRRRRRGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH!!!! HOLY FUCKING SHIT, THAT’S BIG!
Ryan: “I told ya!”
Logan: “RRRGGGGHHHH!!! Don’t fucking stop, Ryan….I want you to be rough….I want you to give it to me hard, don’t hold back.”

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Logan’s wish was my command….Fully knowing that my dream had truly became true, I kicked it into high gear and proceeded to bang the living shit out of Logan. No holds barred whatsoever. His ass was exactly as I’d expected I’d feel, a warm, soothing velvet sleeve… Logan’s sexual, gravelly, animalistic roars didn’t scare me, they just got me more and more fired up. Soon, Logan began to shake his ass, frivolously milking my cock…That sort of “twerking while being fucked” move always turned me on in gay porn, so to feel that experience in real life just fueled my horniness even more….After a few minutes of absolute, pure heaven…I felt it coming. I desperately tried to hold it off to try and savor the moment but just like how the cork flies off of a champagne bottle if you shake it enough, I inevitably came.

Ryan: “OH GOD…OH FUCK YEAH!!, Logan...you better get ready...because any second now, I'm gonna....I'm gonna...OOOOOHHHHHHHHH
Logan: “RRRRRAAGGGGHHHHHHH!!!!!

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After the deed was done and I had peeled the semen-laden condom off my member, Logan and I cuddled in the nude for what seemed like an eternity on his bed…Logan’s huge, muscular arm was wrapped around me as I gently nuzzled his chest hair…

Ryan: “There are no words to describe how fucking amazing you were in bed….It was everything I expected and more.”
Logan: “That’s funny…..I could say the same about you….Babe….By the way, it’s 9:00PM, it’s not like I’m trying to force you out of my house, but don’t you have a family to go back to? Won’t your folks be worried?”
Ryan: “Well, I sorta kinda got permission already….I told my Mom and Dad that I was going to sleep over a friend’s house after helping him with his English project and they believed me…
Logan: “Ah, so you lied….you bad, bad boy!”
Ryan: “HEY! It ain’t lying. It’s “stretching the truth” Which is…..pretty much the same thing as lying. Listen, I’m....going to keep our relations on the down-low. For now, It’ll just be between you and I.”
Logan: “I feel like that would be best….”

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After about two hours’ time had passed where I spent quality time with Logan, hugging, kissing, talking about random subjects like our favorite music, our favorite TV shows (nice to know I’m not the only one totally addicted to Hell’s Kitchen!), We both had the desire to take showers and end the day with a good night’s sleep together….I took my shower upstairs while Logan took his shower downstairs….In a short timeframe, after I put my blue bikini brief back on, Logan walked in wearing a tight bikini brief of his own…A sexy leopard print bikini that could almost be considered a thong....Before I could even respond with words, after seeing his sexy body in that tiny piece of underwear, I yanked him onto the bed and once again, we made out…

Logan: “Heh, well that answers my question of “Do you like what I’m wearing”?”

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We crawled in under the covers, Logan shut the light…..And we went fast asleep…For the first time since Mark De Luca, I shared a bed with another man…another lover….
 
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The next morning, I awoke with the sight of glistening sunlight burning through Logan’s gigantic bedroom window….I groggily pulled myself out of Logan’s uber-comfortable bed to find absolutely no sign of Logan whatsoever…Before I got worried and started to search the house for him, I put on the same clothes I had on yesterday…I didn’t get them dirty at all, so there’s no shame in wearing the same stuff two days in a row.

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As I walked downstairs, I was instantly greeted with the heavenly aroma of bacon in the frying pan...I peered into the kitchen to find the kitchen table set with two places, and Logan making breakfast for the two of us….He was garbed in a sexy wife beater/ cargo shorts combo, which showed off his toned upper body extraordinarily well..

Logan: “Oh, you’re up! How’s it going?”
Ryan: “Pretty good!”
Logan: “I thought you’d want some breakfast before you head out on your way back home! I’m making some bacon and scrambled eggs, you like that?”
Ryan: “I’d LOVE that! Thank you so much!”

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After eating Logan’s delicious breakfast, It was approximately 8:45AM, I figured that now would be an appropriate time to head back home and pick up Denise from her friend’s house….As Logan saw to my safe exit from his house, I obviously did not forget to give him a big goodbye kiss on the lips…

Logan: “We’ll see each other again….right?”
Ryan: “Of course we will…baby.”

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I entered my car, turned it on and with a final wave goodbye to Logan, I pulled out of his driveway and went on my way……The radio station was tuned to the local classic rock station. As much as I love rock music, I don’t like to listen to classic rock radio due to the fact that they play the same shit over and over again. Same three Van Halen songs (Panama, Runnin’ With The Devil, and Jump), same three AC/DC songs (Hell’s Bells, Thunderstruck, Back In Black), same three Rush songs (Tom Sawyer, The Spirit of Radio, and Limelight), but this time I decided to give the radio another try….Currently, they were playing the Alive! version of Rock and Roll All Nite by KISS….

Radio DeeJay: “Alright, so that was Rock and Roll All Nite by KISS! And there’s some major news about KISS right now, Recently they’ve released dates for their 40th Anniversary co-headlining tour with Def Leppard! And on July 7th, they’re going to be playing at the Vietnam War Memorial Stadium here in Sunset Valley! Tickets are going to be going on sale in about a month!
Ryan: “Hmmmmm.....Logan’s a big KISS fan, I’d wonder if he’d be interested in going with me, just the two of us!”
Radio Deejay: “How does another KISS song sound? This next one is quite a change of pace from KISS usual hard-rockin’ style.

The radio began to play the KISS song Forever from the Hot In The Shade album. One of KISS’ few power ballads and one of their most popular songs from the 1980s no-makeup period…
It seemed rather fitting, for obvious reasons…..

 
Second Semester
Chapter Nineteen: More than Friends


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Well, it’s been a week since it happened.
Ever since then, there is not a day that goes by when I’m not totally in shock when I realize that I actually lived out my fantasy with Logan….There are still times when I’m like “Damn, Professor Hardwick has a great ass that I’d love to fuck!” and I suddenly realize….”holy shit, I actually DID!”. Part of me still feels like it’s simply too good to be true that it happened, like I dreamed the whole thing….but then I check my phone, and see Logan Hardwick’s number right in my contacts….and it hits me that it wasn’t no dream, it was reality.

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However, one of the things that I regret about my experience with Logan is this…We never established a true relationship before we jumped right into having sex….I would have loved to have known him better as a person before we established a relationship. So many people I know go out of their way to avoid the dreaded “F-Word” that supposedly destroys sexual relationships (that F-Word of course, being “friend” as in “Let’s just be friends.”).

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However, part of me still wants that F-word….I figured that if technically, Logan and I are “together”, it’s the perfect time to have a meeting with him were we don’t flirt, we don’t fuck, we just have a nice conversation and pick each other’s brains and learn more about each other.

Recently, I had finally gotten done with all of my remaining homework assignments, including my English project on any of the Bronte sister’s novels (I chose Wuthering Heights, by the way.) and with both of my parents at work and Denise over her friend’s house (how convenient, I’m home alone once again!) I figured this was the perfect time to get on the phone with Logan and ask him if we can just hang out, as if we were just friends.

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Without even taking a moment to think about it, I whipped out my cell phone, scrolled through my contacts to find Logan Hardwick, and pressed the “Call Logan Hardwick” option. The low pitched humming beep sounded at one-second intervals for a few seconds….then, I heard his unmistakable voice. The gruff, gravelly and badass, yet warm and friendly voice of Logan…

Logan: “Hello?”
Ryan: “Hey sexy…this is Ryan.”
Logan: “Hey babe! Nice to hear from you again…How are you?”
Ryan: “Nothing to complain about, so I’m doing fine! How about you?”
Logan: “Oh, same old, same old.”
Ryan: “Logan, is it okay if I ask you something?”
Logan: “Of course! What’s up?”
Ryan: “Lately….I’ve been thinking...it’s been a week since we slept with each other, and even though that was probably the best fuck I ever had in my life…I sort of feel bad about something….the fact that we just jumped straight into having sex and a possible romantic relationship before even getting to know each other….My point is, do you think we can hang out together….you know…as if we were….”
Logan: “Friends?”
Ryan: “Yeah….I’d like to get to know you better.”
Logan: “That sounds really good, I’m free today if you want to stop by!”
Ryan: “Okay! I’ll be there soon!”

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Soon enough, I pulled up to Logan’s palatial cliffside mansion to find him already waiting for me. Despite the fact that we were supposed to be meeting as just friends, Logan walked up to me after I exited my car and planted a small kiss on my lips. Not a lot of male friends I know do that…

Logan: “Hey babe…”
Ryan: “Nice to see you…”

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I once again, walked into Logan’s home, taking in the sheer beauty of the post-modern style mansion as Logan lead me down to his living room and beckoned me to sit on his couch.

Logan: “So….what’s on ya mind? What do you want to talk about?”
Ryan: “Well…I thought that maybe I could learn a little more about you as a person…”
Logan: “What else is there to know about? I already told you most of my life. I’m a former pro-bodybuilder turned male model and college professor, I came out as gay to my parents at 19 years old…I was born July 29th, 1967….I’m going to be 47 this summer…”

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Ryan: “A pro bodybuilder-turned-professor seems like such an odd career switch…care to explain how that came about?”
Logan: “You can thank my father, Bill Hardwick for that…Twelve years ago, he took me aside and asked me to watch a documentary on professional athletes who made a ton of money, and then became broke when they retired. I kept telling Dad that I had a passion towards bodybuilding and that I was at the top of my game, but my Dad can be a persistent fucker. He kept reminding me “Logan, there is no pension in bodybuilding! There is no chance for a proper retirement! What if you were to get injured while working out, you’ll be just like a racehorse that breaks his leg! You’re going to be put out to pasture!” When I went back to school and majored in human psychology after bodybuilding, that’s when I realized my true calling, to teach people. Looking back now, I’m glad I took his advice, because I wouldn’t be where I am today if I had continued bodybuilding.

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Ryan: “Interesting….but what in the world prompted you to become a Black Stallion Studios actor and model as a side job?
Logan: “It’s a very simple answer, I wanted to moonlight bodybuilding. I love teaching, but I’ve always loved bodybuilding equally as much. In 2009, I found out via a magazine for gay men that Black Stallion Studios were looking for models and I thought that I could find a new audience to show off my hard work in bodybuilding. I was at first, a little leery about joining a gay porno studio…but seeing as how I’m gay myself, I really had no reason to feel that way. I’m just not interested in fucking a guy or masturbating on camera…Also, everybody treats me so well there, especially Silas, he’s a really good guy, a little weird…but still very nice……Anyway, I’d like to know a little more about you…How is everything going on in your family?”
Ryan: “Everything is currently okay from my viewpoint, my little sister Denise is getting really good grades!”
Logan: “That’s very good! If you don’t want to answer this next question, you don’t have to, How are you feeling right now concerning…..Benjamin?”
Ryan: “Ehhh, it was a very hard thing to go through but….I’m dealing with it…I still haven’t told Denise and I don’t plan to tell her until she is WAY older.”
Logan: “I understand and I am happy that you made that decision, eleven years old is too young to find out she had a big brother who passed on shortly after birth…”

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Instantaneously, I changed the subject. I knew Logan meant well, but the topic of what happened to my brother is not something I like to dwell on.

Ryan: “You know what’s really crazy about life? You never quite know what is going to happen to you….For instance, I’ve been collecting pictures of hot guys on the internet for years on my phone and some of them I suspect are actually photographs of you. I would have never thought that I would actually formulate a relationship with the hot guy in that picture, let alone think he’s a fantastic guy and love him….
Logan: “Awww…thank you Ryan.”
And with that said, I kissed him on the lips….
Logan: “Now I’d like to look at some of these pictures of me, and see if I remember where they came from!”

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I flipped through my vast collection of hot guys before stopping at a picture of a man who I now know is definitely Logan. The photograph depicted Logan, standing in a strong, masculine manner on a rock formation, wearing nothing but a thong. I recognized this picture as a still from an extremely hot Black Stallion Studios video starring Logan called “Bounce”. I remember the video as follows, it begins with the camera focusing on Logan’s private beach before going into a scene where Logan/Matt, emerges from the water, wearing nothing but a tight, red thong swimsuit. Then, Logan goes into his patented old-school herculean-esque posing routine before doing something that gave the video it’s name….He had begun to bounce his pecs for a solid minute before climbing to the top of one of the rock walls where he continued to pose and bounce his pecs….Before the video ended, Logan/Matt turned around to show his big bubble butt to the camera, and like his pecs, bounced his glutes…

Ryan: “I’ve always loved this picture and in that video, you looked DAMN hot.”
Logan: “Yeah, the Bounce video was always one of my favorites…Simple posing video on a nice day down at my beach…Hey Ryan, check this out!”
Logan began to seductively bounce his pecs, just like in the video.
Ryan: “Logan will you stop? You’re making me horny!”

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I flipped again through my various collection of hot guys and came across another picture of Logan…This time, the photo took place in a brick dungeon-esque setting with Logan standing in dominance, holding a bullwhip. He was wearing a BDSM-inspired outfit consisting of him being shirtless while wearing leather gloves, extremely tight leather assless chaps, and black riding boots.

Ryan: “Oh, I’ve always loved this one of you!”
Logan: “I remember this…This was back in 2010 when I was the selected model for Black Stallion Studios’ “Leather Month” which is always October. I went in there with absolutely NO firsthand experience of S&M but I ended up doing a pretty good job if I may say so myself!”

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The very next picture in my collection was actually yet another picture of Logan, this time wearing a purple bikini. I figured that the picture must have been taken a while ago…He had much shorter hair and instead of his goatee, he had his facial stubble, but was wearing an old west/cowboy style handlebar moustache.

Ryan: “Here’s another really hot one!”
Logan: “That IS a really hot picture! It’s also not me.”
Ryan: “WHAT? Who could it be then? This guy looks just like you, seriously!”

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Logan: “I know exactly who that is, though. The guy in that picture is a bodybuilder and former male stripper by the name of Jeffery Rustenson. He basically went in the opposite direction as I did. I am a former pro bodybuilder turned male model, he’s the other way around. He actually released a book of all of his photos from his amateur bodybuilder/male model days, It’s called “The Male Body” which I presume this photo on your phone is from. Also, unlike me, he’s straight.”
Ryan: “Do you know him?”
Logan: “I never met him, but I know people who know him socially…Before you get too hot for him, I think I should let you in on a little bit of an unsavory fact about him….Despite the fact that Jeff was a male model and his book was geared towards homosexual men, Jeff is a very conservative Republican. He’s said many times in fitness blog posts that he thinks that abortion and homosexuality are both wrong.
Ryan: “That makes absolutely no sense whatsoever! The abortion stance is a whole different ball game but how can someone in his position possibly be homophobic? I mean, this guy was a male fucking MODEL for God’s sake!”
Logan: “You’d be surprised how many male strippers and bodybuilders openly disdain gay men. In my tenure of a bodybuilder, I’ve met a lot of fellow bodybuilders that were accepting of my sexual orientation, and of course there were a few that flat-out despised gay men for looking at them. In an extreme case, I’ve heard a bodybuilder say “If that fag over there in the audience tries to touch me, I’ll put him in a fucking coma.” But most of the time, it was “I just hate it when gays admire me!" and "Back off! I’m straight!” But when it comes to Jeff Rustenson….I have some dirt on him that you will just love.”

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Ryan: “Hit me.”
Logan: “According to people who knew him back when he was a male stripper…he’s not totally straight. I personally think he’s either bisexual or he’s 1 or 2 on the Kinsey Scale. There are stories that in the back rooms of these male strip bars, he’d fool around with both girls and guys and allegedly, he once let a guy finger him.
Ryan: “Oh my God, really? But it honestly makes no sense, why lie about who you are?”
Logan: “Jeff is probably one of those people that was ashamed of his bisexuality. Even though he’s attracted to women as if he were straight, he’s completely repressed his attraction towards guys.”
Ryan: “Such a shame…”
 
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After a few seconds of awkward silence, Logan pricked up his ears like an excited dog, as if he forgot something earlier and just remembered it.

Logan: “Ryan, I’d like to show you something about my house that I think you’d love!”
Ryan: “Alright, show me!”
Logan: “But wait…I don’t think you have a swimsuit…”
Ryan: “It’s okay, I don’t need one.”

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Logan lead me through his backyard to a gate by the side of his yard leading to an extremely short trail down to the shoreline…I already knew what he wanted to show me, but I didn’t know for sure until this moment…Logan did indeed have a private beach.

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Logan: “This here…is a beach that I legally own. This is probably the most impressive part of my home, The view of the sunsets are absolutely GORGEOUS from here. And of course, I don’t have to leave my home to spend a day at the beach, so I have the option to go into the pool and the beach from my own home.”
Ryan: “Logan, all I can say is that you live in paradise.”
Logan: “What do you say that we take a dip in the ocean?”

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Having not brought a swimsuit with me, I had no choice but to swim in my boxer shorts, but it wasn’t like there was any problem with it…Hell, I’d skinny dip if it came to that…I turned around, and I was instantly greeted with a sight that I would not soon forget….Logan Hardwick pulling down his khaki shorts to reveal the same exact red thong he wore in the “Bounce” video….He must have expected me to take a look at him, because as he peeled his shorts off, he shook his muscle ass just like in that video…..

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Without even taking a single moment to second guess myself, I walked straight over to Logan and laid my hand right on his massive behind and squeezed his beefy man butt. Logan looked at me and smiled seductively.

Logan: “I had a feeling you would like it!”
Ryan: “Logan, I can’t do this “friend” shit anymore, I am SO fucking that ass when we’re done swimming.”
Logan: “I knew you’d come around!”

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Without wasting any more time, Logan and I ran straight into the water, where we spent our time soaking in the salty water and taking turns jumping on each other’s backs and purposely being knocked down by waves. While we played in the water, I truly felt as if Logan and I were a true couple, like we’ve known each other for many years….

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Once we were done spending time in the water, I pounced Logan like a wild tiger and we began making out in the sand...Despite the fact that I said before that I wanted to just hang out with Logan as a friend, I just couldn’t do it anymore….I love Logan with all my heart, and I want nothing more than to make love to him.

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But as soon as I pulled his thong off, I was instantly presented with a dilemma…

Ryan: “Wait, I don’t have any lube…”
Logan: “I think I have a small bottle of aloe vera lotion in the pocket of my shorts, I’ll go get it.”

However, as soon as that problem was solved, I was faced with another, more serious problem…

Ryan: “Logan, I assume you don’t have any condoms in those shorts?”
Logan: “Nope.”
Ryan: “ I don’t either….Looks like we don’t have any other choice, we have to bareback….But please, don’t worry. This is my first time barebacking actually. Every single time I’ve had sex, either my partner or I used protection.”
Logan: “Ryan….I trust you…If I didn’t trust you, I wouldn’t let you fuck me at all…..Just do it.”

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Logan lied on the sand face-down, his beautiful muscle butt presented to me….I removed my soaking wet boxers, applied the aloe vera lotion on my member, and pressed my chest and stomach to his back…My unsheathed member slowly started to work its way into his hole…Logan’s breathing became more and more intense as my dick slithered all the way up the warm sleeve…

Logan: “Oh……fuck YES!!!!

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I supported myself with my arms as I let my hip muscles completely take over. I shifted into high gear and began to just massacre his ass. The familiar slapping sound of rough sex and Logan’s sexual roars echoed throughout the shoreline. Logan’s roaring and heavy breathing indicated he enjoyed it rough…

Ryan: “YEAH!!! TAKE THAT FUCKING DICK! TAKE IT! GOD YOUR ASS IS SO FUCKING TIGHT!!!!
Logan: “OH GIVE IT TO ME, RYAN….JUST GIVE IT TO ME.
Ryan: “Logan…you better get ready for it…because I’m gonna….I’m gonna…..AAAAARRRRGGHHH!!

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For the first time in my life, I felt my hot, steamy man-juices erupt out of my dick like a volcano and fill Logan’s ass up. Part of me was now inside of him….I collapsed on his back and kissed his neck romantically as my dick grew more and more flaccid inside of him before it finally popped out. A few drops of white liquid dripped out of Logan's hole...Further impacting the fact that for the first time in possibly both our lives, we did it without protection...

Logan: “That was….incredible, probably the best I have ever had…”
Ryan: “I could say the same.”

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Logan and I cuddled in the sand, completely nude for what seemed like hours...We were both way too sandy to put our clothes back on at the beach, so we gathered them up and walked back to the house in the nude…We both took showers to wash the sand and salt off of our bodies before putting our clothes back on.

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Once we were both all dressed and squared away, I realized that it was a quarter to 3PM. Even though Mom and Dad were working until the evening, it was almost time for me to pick up Denise from her friend’s house. I had no choice but to once again, bid Logan goodbye.

Ryan: “I’m really sorry I have to leave so early. My parents would kill me if I didn’t pick up my sister from her friend’s house.”
Logan: “Trust me, I understand. I hope we meet again, Ryan. Love you!”
Ryan: “I love you too, Logan…”

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As I drove away from Logan’s mansion, thoughts began to swirl around my head again….Logan and I can’t keep our relationship on the down-low forever. Pretty soon, Logan has to tell his parents that he has a boyfriend and I’m going to have to tell my parents that I’m romantically involved with my sociology professor from my first semester of college…..

Ryan: “This is going to be a challenge…How will our loved ones react? How will Logan’s folks react to him dating a man that’s more than half his age? How will my parents react to me, not only dating a 46 year old man, but my sociology professor? I doubt this is going to be pretty……even if my parents end up liking Logan and Logan’s parents like me.”

It’s times like these where I feel like love is truly about taking risks.
 
Second Semester
Chapter Twenty: A Secret Lover


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It’s always the same ritual over and over again….Whenever I want some tranquil time for myself to think, I always strip off all my clothes, put on a speedo and take in the sights of the shore on my veranda. It seems like the only thing that changes are what I’m thinking about and the color of the speedo I’m wearing….This time, it was a blue and yellow Olympic-style swim brief I was wearing…and revealing my relationship with Ryan was what I was thinking…..

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Logan: “I really, REALLY should tell my parents about Ryan. They deserve the right to know that I’m going out with someone….But how the fuck am I going to explain that I’m going out with a man that’s TWENTY EIGHT years younger than me? I mean, I’m 46 and going out with an 18 year old! That’s such a HUGE age difference….How will my parents, especially my father, feel about that? I doubt they’ll be terribly happy….but I can’t just lie and say that I’m still single unless I want to be hounded with “did you find anyone yet?” questions from my mom or my dad….”

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Before I got myself too flustered, I calmed down and shifted my thoughts to another direction….

Logan: “I really should go pay Silas a visit…I haven’t really spoken to him since I hooked up with Marion…Maybe he can help me with my dilemma…”

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The following afternoon, I took that familiar route down Redwood Lane to the edge of Southern Sunset Valley where Silas’ mansion lies. As I did three other times since I started making entries to this iJournal, I knocked on the door…As soon as I knocked, my instincts told me right away that a certain someone was going to be the person answering….and they were correct as usual. There, on the other side of the doorway stood former fitness model James Davenport, sporting his usual high-and-tight hair/beard combo. It seemed like that particular hairstyle is common in two facets of life, the military and gay porn….

James: “LOGAN! What a surprise, man! How’s it been?!”
Logan: “I’m doing fine, has Silas been around?”
James: “Yes, he’s right in his office as usual! He’s been looking forward for your visit actually, the latest video you did was a real hit!”
Logan: “Thanks man…I’ll go talk to him right now!”

As I did before, I took that walk through the ornate hallway leading to his office…..

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Silas: “Ah! Logan, my dear! Come sit down! We have a very pressing matter to discuss!”
Logan: “It’s nice to see you too, Silas!”
Silas: “Your latest video, Medieval Muscle has exploded! It’s become quite the smash hit since it was released last October! I think it might be one of our most popular videos yet…”
Logan: “That’s phenomenal! But you shouldn’t give me all the credit, it was YOUR idea to have me ride that horse wearing nothing but a thong in that video! Hot guys riding horses for some reason is pretty damn irresistible!
Silas: “Speaking of that, I’d like you to give you something….feeding off the success of the video, I designed this posters of you that I’m planning to sell one day! I’d like you to have one.”

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Silas handed me the poster rolled up in a tube. I instantly unfurled it revealing a beautiful picture of me on the back of the horse used for the video. It was truly a gorgeous picture….I was hugging the horse’s neck, the only things in the background were the trees surrounding that medieval style house and the blue sky….In that shot in particular, I looked so one with nature….No buildings or human structures surrounded me, I was wearing next to nothing, it was just me on the back of the mighty steed….I knew Silas wanted me to keep the poster for myself, but in the back of my head, I thought of someone who would want this poster ten times more than I would….

Logan (in his mind): “I think Ryan would absolutely love this poster….”

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After receiving the poster, I was all ready to say goodbye….but suddenly, I thought of the real reason why I wanted to bid Silas a visit…I needed serious advice on how to deal with the looming elephant in the room that was my relationship with Ryan….

Logan: “Hey Si…I’ve been wanting to talk to you about something.”

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From there, I just laid it all out in front of him. I told him about how I suspected Ryan had a crush on me the entire time he was in my History of Sociology class, and how my suspicions were correct when he revealed his attraction for me that fateful day in the pool at the gym complex…..I also told him how I’ve also had a secret attraction towards him and through that, we decided to have sex which then blossomed into a loving relationship….Silas was taken aback at the proposition, but I could tell he wasn’t really offended by it, just confused….

Silas: “So let me get this straight Logan….You’re 46 years old, going to be 47 in July…..And the person you’re involved with is a former student of yours who is 18 years old, going to be 19 in June…
Logan: “Yes….”
Silas: “This….is quite a predicament. The age gap between you and this “Ryan” is very large….I have no doubt that you two truly do love each other….But I feel I must warn you….You shouldn’t tell anyone else other than me about him to protect your own personal reputation. Despite the fact that your relationship is 100% legal and consensual, people will still judge you anyway for dating such a young man, not to mention a former student of yours….”
Logan: “I’ve been feeling similarly about that too….But I can’t keep my parents in the dark forever…and I’m pretty sure Ryan feels the same way about his parents. Eventually, they’re going to have to know…”
Silas: “I’m sorry, but I myself am at a loss of what to do in a situation like this….The only idea I have is to tell your parents that he’s 28 years old, not 18……If it is true that Ryan is very mature for an 18 year old, you could easily get away with stretching the truth about his age.”
Logan: “Silas….you know how I feel about lying. I was extremely reluctant to act straight for the sake of playing the Matt Manchester character, but to suggest that I should lie about my partner’s age?........But if you think that it’s for the best that I tell my parents that he’s 28….Then I don’t quite have much of an option, do I?”
Silas: “Trust me…I really do think this is for the better…”
 
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I left his office, somehow feeling more confused than when I first arrived…On my way out, I noticed that James was standing all alone in the gorgeous sitting room….I had no intention of talking to anyone else on this trip out there, but I figured “what the hell?” and decided to strike up some conversation.

Logan: “Hey James!”
James: “Hi Logan! Did he talk to you about the video?”
Logan: “Yes he did actually, it’s actually one of the most popular videos that BSS put out!”
James: “I’m so proud of you, man! It seems like you’re really becoming Silas’ top dog….Your videos have always been very popular amongst Black Stallion Studios fans…It’s really no surprise after all I mean, Goddamn…That ass of yours is absolute perfection! Perfectly muscular and voluptuous!
Logan: “Yeah, I’m quite proud of these bad boys!”

I lightly slapped both of my ass cheeks to emphasize my point.

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James: “Your arrival to Black Stallion five years ago was a real light in the dark for us…You came at a time where things weren’t going that well for us and I think your arrival really re-invigorated this studio….Although we know things will never be the same……We….... still miss him very much.....I still miss him very much....”

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I know what you’re all asking, who is “him”?

His screen name was Tyler Wolfthorn, his real life name was Tyler Miller….Let’s just say that he was Silas’ top dog before my arrival. Tyler was an absolute fucking GIANT who stood at a height of 6’6 and was built like the quintessential muscle bull. A perfect combination of muscle and fat made him one of the most attractive muscle bears in gay porn. He initially got that beautiful physique from his years as a professional strongman before he retired, came out of the closet as gay and joined BSS. Tyler had a pretty nice sized dick at approximately 7 inches long, but his main asset was, not surprisingly, his ass! My fans say I have a nice ass all the time, but in my honest opinion, Tyler Wolfthorn put my ass to shame. Such a huge, round, muscular and bodacious butt….There was nothing he loved more than to show that ass off. Like me, he had the ability to bounce his glutes like his pecs, and of course that just drove everyone crazy.

He did a good amount of solo videos, but he also did a lot of actual porn. He was versatile and had no problems fucking the shit out of someone or taking it in his big, beautiful ass. He was known for his guttural growls and roars during sex paired up with lots of dirty talk. A good amount of his videos were flip-fucks, so you get to see him top and bottom in one video.

Also, according to people who knew Tyler Wolfthorn as a person, he was supposedly an incredibly sweet man who loved meeting with fans, donated a lot of his money that he received for his videos to charities, and he was also known outside of porn for being a volunteer firefighter and an anti-bullying activist…He truly had a love for life, and was all around a kind, selfless, and loving individual…In fact, James, who knew him personally describes him as a man who would take a bullet for a puppy or a kitten.

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Unfortunately…..Tyler’s no longer with us...What happened to the man is an absolute tragedy…On January 4th 2009, shortly after finishing up shooting for his final video, an office themed flip-fuck with actor and Black Stallion Butler Everett Estevez. He was driving back to his home across the causeway linking Southern Sunset Valley with Sunset Isle, the small island neighborhood near the mainland of Sunset Valley....A drunk driver veered off the lane next to him and collided with the side of Tyler’s car...From what I gathered from the local news story, his car spun out after hitting the divider, flipped over five times before literally jumping over the fence and directly into the ocean……He wasn’t able to escape his car in time…..And search and rescue teams found him underwater, dead in his car the very next day…Tyler Wolfthorn/Miller was only 43 years old when he died….He was going to turn 44 that March.

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(Gravestone reads: Tyler Paul Miller: 1965-2009)

His death was a very huge blow to Black Stallion Studios. Silas, and the Butlers were all absolutely devastated…they lost someone they considered a very close friend and confidant. His fans were all deeply saddened at his sudden and untimely demise. James is absolutely correct in the fact that I came into the fray at a very, VERY bad time for Black Stallion Studios….they had just lost one of their top guys, I have a feeling that the reason why I was hired very quickly was because Silas saw something in me that reminded him of Tyler…Of course, once I was hired, the troubles didn’t end for Black Stallion Studios magically. That same year, Antonio Baroncelli suddenly left Black Stallion Studios and re-emerged as Pastor Brian Morton, a raging homophobe “ex-gay” Christian fundamentalist. Tyler and Antonio were both two very popular pornstars….So I knew I had some pretty big shoes to fill…

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I noticed that tears were beginning to well up in James’ eyes as we both reminisced about Tyler…I personally never met him, but James did….and It doesn’t take a genius to figure out that James had a bit of a thing for him.

James: “Oh Christ…..Why did he have to die?! Why did God have to take him?! He was such a good man and a great friend….He was a beautiful person, both inside and out! He didn’t deserve to go so soon! And the worst part of this whole thing….I never got to…I….
Logan: “Just….calm down…I’m here….”
James: “I never got to tell Tyler what I truly felt about him…. that…..that….I l-l-loved him…and that I wanted to go out with him sometime…”

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Logan: “I’ve suspected for a while that you had a thing for him, every time you and Silas would reminisce about him…you always had such kind things to say about him…And even though it is a shame that you never got to get it off your chest and tell Tyler what you felt about him…but listen to me…you can’t beat yourself up over this forever…According to what you and others who met him told me, Tyler always had this unparalleled love for life. He loved to have a good time and always had a very positive attitude. If there is an afterlife, do you think that he would want you to sit there, obsessing about what could have been and making yourself miserable in the process? What do you think he would want you to do?”
James: “No….He definitely wouldn’t…he’d want me to turn my frown upside-down…go out and live life to the fullest…he held those customs dear to him.”

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After James wiped the tears from his eyes, I was about to bid him goodbye, but he still had one last thing to say to me....and what he said was something I would have never expected at all in my visit here.

James: “One more thing….Recently, I’ve been thinking a lot about…you. And admittedly, I’ve been comparing you a lot to Tyler….You both share so many characteristics, you’re both very handsome muscle bears….you have a very good, friendly personality, and just an all-around great guy to be around. I realize there is nothing that I can do about the fact that I never told Tyler what I really felt….but it’s not too late to tell you what I feel about you….I’ve always really liked you, Logan, and not because you remind me somewhat of Tyler. You’re beautiful in your own way…Would you even consider….going out with me?"

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I soon found myself in quite a predicament, only a few weeks after I started my relationship with Ryan…I had someone I considered a friend ask me out on a date….I’ve always liked James, but I never viewed him at all in a romantic way…Despite the fact that James is a good looking man, I had no choice but to decline. I’m already in love with and dedicated to Ryan. He is the one for me and I am the one for him…I could NEVER live with myself if I gave James what he wanted.

Logan: “I’m flattered that you’d compare me to someone like Tyler and I thank you for your compliments….but I’m afraid I can’t do it. I’m already in love with another man and I could never break his heart…So I’m afraid the answer is no.”
James: “I had a feeling you were going to say something like that….In fact, I already prepared myself for you to say no…..With all of what happened in mind, it seems like love is simply a game I cannot win.”

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Logan: “I’ve definitely felt similar….After Marion left Black Stallion Studios, I thought I would never find love ever again....And then all of the sudden, I fall in love with someone whom I never thought I’d ever fall in love with…and he ends up being the one I’ve been looking for. I think the same is going to happen to you, man.”
James: “You really think so?”
Logan: “ I know so.”

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After wiping away a tear of happiness and hope from his eye…James tackled me in a loving hug…It seemed like my talk gave James something that has been missing from his life for a while….hope.

James: “Thank you, Logan…for everything. I may not be able to make love to you, but I must say…you are a true friend.”

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I walked away from Silas’ mansion…Satisfied that even in my confusion….I was able to help a friend in need….
 
Second Semester
Chapter Twenty One: Return of an Old Friend


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A lot had changed in my life since I first started going out with Logan….Unfortunately one of the things that DIDN’T change…was the school workload. It seemed to have been getting worse with each passing day….It usually goes like this, a professor will assign homework due a certain day and you think it’s not too bad…..then another professor assigns homework that same day, then another one, and another one and it keeps building up and up before you even have time to react….

On one Tuesday, I was so swamped up to my neck with these small textbook assignments that I didn’t even have time to check my phone…When I eventually did that evening, I was surprised to find out that I had a voicemail from someone I’m very well acquainted with…My ex-boyfriend Mark De Luca.

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I pressed the play button on my phone screen, wondering to myself what it was that Mark wanted….Does he want a favor from me? Does he want to just hang out? Does he want to get back together? I pondered over the third scenario in abject horror and confusion on how I can tell him that I’m dating someone else…let alone a 46 year old muscular professor from our college…

Thankfully, it was the second scenario.

Mark: “Uhhh…hey Ryan….It’s been a while since I’ve heard from you….Recently I’ve been thinking, even though we’re not together anymore, we can still see each other as….well, friends. I’ve been thinking that perhaps soon we should chill together….like we used to back in Freshmen year...You know…play a little Red Dead Redemption or Call of Duty like we used to…And just catch up on things….sounds good to you?”

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After listening to his message, I logged into Facebook on my laptop to see if he was still online…Surely enough, Mark De Luca had the little bright-green dot next to his name on the messenger…

Ryan: “I got your voicemail. I’d love to hang out with you one day!”

Within no more than a few seconds, I got a reply.

Mark: “That’s awesome! Whose house do you think we should chill at? My house or your house?
Ryan: “You’re more than welcome to go over my house.”
Mark: “How does Friday sound?”
Ryan: “Pretty good! I’ll see you then!”

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Wednesday and Thursday passed by without much event…The same old college things took place….Lectures and more homework…..However before I knew it, Friday was here…At approximately 3:30 in the afternoon that day, the knock on the door I was expecting had finally come…

Ryan: “MARK! Hey, What’s up man!”
Mark: “Nothing much bro, It’s just great to see you again! I really like your new look!”
Ryan: “Yeah, I’ve needed a haircut for a while! I like yours too!”
Mark: “Thank you!”

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Ryan: “So Mark…it’s been a while since we’ve seen each other…And it’s pretty awkward seeing as how the last time we’ve seen each other was when we….
Mark: “Broke up?”

As soon as Mark spoke those words, we were both enveloped in an extremely awkward pause….The reality hit home for me once again. Even though Mark and I were friends, it still doesn’t change the fact that we were once boyfriends….and even more awkward is the fact we had sex…

Ryan: “Yeah….but just because we’re not in a relationship anymore, that doesn’t mean we can’t still just be friends!”
Mark: “That’s true…”

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Mark and I subsequently kicked back and relaxed in the living room. I took the opportunity given to me to catch up on things with Mark, everything from school to our lives in general…

Ryan: “So how have things been?”
Mark: “I can’t really complain, Ryan…Things are going pretty good…My classes are coming with a healthy dosage of stress, but that’s to be expected.”
Ryan: “What classes are you taking?”
Mark: “Lets see, I’m taking a math class, I’m taking American History, a public speaking class....and….Oh yeah, History of Sociology!”

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My ears pricked up like an excited dog after Mark mentioned that he was taking a class named History of Sociology….I knew it could very well be that Mark’s professor could be....him…

Ryan: “You’re taking History of Sociology? Who’s your professor?”
Mark: “Hardwick….Professor Hardwick…I assume you had him last semester?”
Ryan: “….Yeah…”
Mark: “He talks a LOT about you in class… When I mentioned that I’m friends with you, he had a lot of really nice things to say about you, how you’re an amazing person and how you’ve been such an inspiration to him…He seems to really like you!”
Ryan: “He’s definitely one of the better teacher’s I’ve had over the years. He really seems to care a lot about his students…not just in that prototypical “cool teacher-to-student” way, but in a way that really makes you feel like you’ve known him your entire life….In fact, there was one time when…”

Before I could finished my statement, I was interrupted by the voice of a demanding, omnipotent goddess among humankind…

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My little sister….

Denise: “RYAN! I’m bored! Can we please play on the Wii together?”
Ryan: “Can it wait a little bit? I’m sort of busy hanging out with Mark.”
Denise: PLEASE!?”
Ryan: “No Denise, not right now!”

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Ryan: “Anyway Mark, it was after I found out about Benjamin and I was going through a very rough period….I was in a deep depression, I had no desire to do anything anymore, I couldn’t stop thinking about Benjamin and what my life would be like if he had lived……Professor Hardwick had no problem taking the time out for me to talk to him about the ordeal and during our conversation, it felt like I was talking to a close friend, and not just a nice professor.”
Denise: “Ryan, can I have a piece of candy?”
Ryan: “No Denise, it’s 4:00, dinner is going to be in less than two hours….Anyway, Mark….You really are very lucky to have Professor Hardwick as your teacher, I think he could be the best damn professor in the entire school….”

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A downtrodden Denise stormed away from the living room….Perfect timing for the turn that the conversation about Logan took…

Mark: “I agree, Ryan…He really is a sweet guy…And on top of that, he’s a pretty good looking guy, if I say so myself! He mentioned on the first day of class that he’s a former pro bodybuilder, which makes sense seeing as how he’s absolutely jacked! I really got to say, if you’re into muscle bears, this guy is perfect, he has a really nice beard and OH, that ass. That. Fucking. Ass. Am I right?"

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Mark’s description of Logan sent a combined shockwave of anxiety and arousal though my body…Instantly, my mind scrambled to find a way to agree with him that Logan’s a good looking man without giving away that one deadly secret…

Ryan: “Oh trust me man, I know…He definitely has the nicest bubble butt of any guy I’ve ever seen. He definitely doesn’t skip leg day! Admittedly, whenever he had his back turned to the class, I’ve definitely copped a few looks at it!
Mark: “Heh…looks like you have the hots for him!!”
Ryan: “Oh come on Mark, he’s a good looking guy, but I-“

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(KA-KLINK) Right as we began talking about Professor Hardwick’s rock-hard physique and the mutual crushes we have on him, the sound of moving glassware in the kitchen caught my attention and I knew right away what that sound was….the candy dish….Turns out, I’m going to have to be the “third parent” once again.

Ryan: “(GASP) Oh no, you don’t!!!”
Denise: “Ha ha ha ha ha!!!!!”

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Ryan: “Denise, You get back here with that candy right now!”
Denise: “You can’t catch meeeeee!!!!”
Ryan: “Oh yeah? You seem to forget that in high school, I was a RUNNINGBACK!

Denise, to her credit, could run really fast, but I was just a smidge faster thanks to my experience in high school football. I was easily able to run around the living room, jumping over furniture effortlessly in order to intercept my little sister.

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Ryan: “Nowhere to run now!”
Denise: “Oh damn it!”
Ryan: “Denise, listen to me. I’m going to level with you, I don’t want you to eat that piece of candy because…..we’re having mom’s homemade fish sticks and french fries for dinner tonight!”
Denise: “WE ARE?!”
Ryan: “Why do you think mom and dad went to the store? To buy all the things we need! Now, you LOVE fish sticks, right?”
Denise: “I do…they’re my second favorite food after pizza.”
Ryan: “Well, if you ate candy now, you won’t want to eat dinner later….If you want, you can have a piece of candy AFTER dinner, deal?”
Denise: “Deal!”

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With that said, she had no problem giving me the two Airheads and the Milky Way bar she took from the candy dish….Mark met up with me in the kitchen as I was putting the candy back where it belonged.

Ryan: “Kids, am I right?”
Mark: “I wouldn’t know…I’m an only child.”
Ryan: “At least you don’t have to deal with how hectic life with a younger sibling can be.”
Mark: “I’ve always wanted an older brother or sister though…Someone who I can always look up to.”
Ryan: “I kind of wonder what my life would be like if I had a big brother…..or if Benjamin survived…But in the end, I’m perfectly happy with Denise. I consider myself very lucky that thanks to my parents, Denise is one of the most open-minded little kids I have ever met in my life…..However, I do worry that high school is going to be rough for her because of that reason….”
Mark: “I agree, high school is such an unforgiving environment….Conformity reigns supreme and individuality is completely abhorred.”
Ryan: “I really hope she’s able to hold her own and stay true to who she is when that time comes….And not give into peer pressure.”

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Mark stayed at my house for approximately an hour…While he was perfectly willing to stay at my house for dinner and maybe a little bit longer, he unfortunately had certain things he had to do at his house, I assumed it meant that he has a lot of homework for his classes like myself……Around 5:00, I was faced with the undesirable task of bidding a very close friend goodbye.

Mark: “Thank you so much for having me over today….
Ryan: It’s seriously no problem, Mark…It was really nice seeing you again.
 
Second Semester
Chapter Twenty Two: Relics Of The Past


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Today started off like any other Wednesday for me this semester...The day kicked off with my Psychology 101 morning class and after a long break, two back-to-back History Of Sociology classes from 12:30 to 1:45PM and 2:30 to 3:45PM…Needless to say, I was kept pretty busy all day.

I’ve always equally enjoyed teaching both of my classes for different reasons. Psychology 101 is a slightly easier class for me to teach. It’s mostly textbook material and the material itself is all stuff that I’ve studied for years when I went back to school. Most of it is all fact based, which unfortunately doesn’t leave that much room for personal input, even though I do try to have fun with the class, especially when I teach about Sigmund Freud and I do the “try not to laugh” challenge…Let’s face it, everything about Freud is about sex and no matter whether it’s college students or high school students, teachers saying the words “penis” and “vagina” always leads to a few giggles!

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History of Sociology is completely different. There is a textbook for that class, but because it’s so expansive and covers a lot of topics, I simply can’t teach directly from the book. Instead, what I do is that I pick topics that I believe the students would be most interested in and take it from there. I definitely have a little more fun with History of Sociology, as it brings a lot of opinions to the table about various social issues. Also…I’ll always associate History of Sociology with Ryan, and all of the good memories I have of him when he was in my class…

Female Student: “Hey Professor Hardwick!”
Logan: “Good afternoon, Melanie!”

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I might not have Ryan in my class anymore, but there is a student in my 2:30-3:45 History Of Sociology class that reminds me a lot of him, and by a complete coincidence, is actually (according to him) one of Ryan’s best buds. His name is Mark De Luca and it really does make a lot of sense that they’re best friends, they’re both incredibly nice, chivalrous, and ambitious guys. They’re both so similar in terms of personality that you could swear they were twin brothers.

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The class as a whole went as planned. My students and I had a long discussion of what role love and romance played in sociology over the years. This lead to a few interesting debates on whether or whether not the idea marriage is outdated and what the meaning of “true love” is. Throughout these debates, I noticed that Mark didn’t look like he wanted to be a part of the discussion, like the idea of talking about love was something he didn’t want to do...That particular History Of Sociology class was my last class of the day and I initially wanted to go directly home, but that was before I realized I had mountains upon mountains of paperwork to do……Upon starting to do the work, I heard a knock on the door, and I wasn’t too surprised to see who it was.

Logan: “Hello Mark! Come in!”

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Mark: “Hey Professor!”
Logan: “Hey man! So what brings you to my office? Anything on your mind?”
Mark: “Well…Today during class, I was thinking about what you said in the beginning of the semester…How if we ever had anything on our minds or we needed help with anything that you promised us you’d listen with an open mind and try your hardest to help us….I feel like I just need to talk to someone right now…”
Logan: “Well, you came to the right place, dude! So what’s up?”
Mark: “I’m sure you noticed that I wasn’t very…into today’s lesson.”
Logan: “Yes…I did. Usually, you’re very vocal in class and you always have something to say….Today you were kind of receding in the background while everyone else spoke their minds…”
Mark: “Well…Today…I really wasn’t in the mood to talk about love and romance and all that stuff because…..because……….I’m going to be straight with you Professor, how do you get over someone you once loved, but let go of?”
Logan: “Um….I’d like to help you, but you’re going to have to give me a little more details…”

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Mark: “(Sighs) This isn’t going to be easy…I’m sure you know that I’m very good friends with one of your former students…Ryan Carlson….”
Logan: “Yeah, you mentioned that a few times.”
Mark: “You see….The relationship that Ryan and I had…was more than just a friendship…I’d like your word that you’ll never mention that we talked about this if you’re still in contact with Ryan…”
Logan: “I swear, what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas.”
Mark: “Ryan and I are both gay …….and we were in a short lived romantic relationship last year…For a while, things were going fantastic between us…We both had a powerful mutual attraction to each other, in terms of both looks and personality….I knew right then and there that it was true love….and I was so fucking stupid that I just let him go like that.”

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Logan: “Well…What were the circumstances that led to your decision to let him go?”
Mark: “One night after a date, I had gotten jumped by a group of gay bashers that must have seen the two of us kissing or holding hands at some point….After that whole mess…I just didn’t feel safe being in a relationship with another man. Every time Ryan visited me during my short hospital stay, I didn’t feel safe with him in my presence…I always had this fear that more people who hate gays were going to find out we were in a relationship and I was going to have a repeat of that whole mess…..I broke up with the greatest thing that ever happened to me out of fear of being attacked again….”

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My jaw dropped….I knew that Mark and Ryan were friends, but I never, ever had an inkling of a clue that Mark was not only gay, but was in a relationship with Ryan….

Logan: “I’m very, very sorry this happened to you…No one deserves to ever get attacked just because they’re gay…And I know just how painful this must be for you. I know Ryan personally, he’s a fantastic guy…and I’m sure he treated you very well when you and him were together…But when it comes to getting over someone you once loved…All I can say is, it just takes time and lots of it…"

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Logan: “Back when I was about your age, maybe a little older…I met and fell in love with this girl named….ehh…I don’t want to give away her real name, so let’s call her “Lisa”. Lisa and I had gotten to know each other very well and when we finally confessed our love to one another, I thought that the relationship was going to last forever, that we were going to get married and have kids and all that stuff. Unfortunately, that didn’t happen. Her family had out of the blue, decided that they were going to move all the way to Alabama, on the complete opposite side of the United States….I tried to convince her that we could try to make our relationship work in the form of a long distance thing, but she refused, saying that she had been in a few long distance relationships in the past and that they never worked out….At that point, she broke up with me and of course…I was absolutely devastated…And it took me quite a while for me to get over her…But soon enough, I realized that maybe she wasn’t the one for me….”

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Mark: “Thank you, so much for telling me that…It really helped me, Professor…”
Logan: “You’re welcome, Mark!”
Mark: “By the way, have you ever talked to that Lisa girl after you broke up or remained friends?”
Logan: “I haven’t talked to her face to face since 1988, but I’ve recently reconnected with her via Facebook. She’s now married to what seems like a very nice guy who treats her very well and they have two kids together. I’d love to reconnect with her in real life, but….I don’t know if that’ll ever happen.”
Mark: “Once again, thank you for helping me…As much as I do miss Ryan as a boyfriend…maybe we just weren’t meant to be together in a romantic sense…Who knows, maybe he’s moved on to someone else…See you soon, Professor!”

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Mark’s last remark before walking out sent a shiver down my spine. Despite Ryan and I making a pact that we would keep our relationship on the downlow, I have always had a terrible fear of someone finding us out…

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Hearing Mark’s story brought back a lot of painful memories for me. The “Lisa” story I told him was actually based in truth, it wasn’t all made up bullshit. In reality, “Lisa” was another guy named Jack, who I met a year after coming out to my parents…I met him at a local gym after gaining an interest in bodybuilding. At first, he was just a workout partner but we soon became friends and more than that….He was not only my first boyfriend, but the first person I was ever in love with, and to top it off, was the one I lost my virginity to…For the year that Jack and I were together, I thought that the relationship was going to last forever….How our relationship ended was in reality, a much sadder story than the fabricated “Lisa” story…

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Jack’s parents found out about our relationship and let me tell you, they were NOT happy one fucking bit. I thought my father’s reaction to me coming out was bad, it was nothing compared to Jack’s parents. You see, Jack’s parents are so politically conservative that it put Bill O’Reilly to shame. They were also very religious, which meant that they bought into the whole “Gays are the devil” bullshit. Surprisingly enough, they were not really mad at their son, rather they directed all their rage towards ME for supposedly “corrupting” their son. Many times, they referred to me as a “vile incubus” who manipulated their son into the “homosexual lifestyle”. Their homophobia was so off the charts that it prompted the decision for them to move out of California, which they referred to as the “land of godless homosexual sodomites.” and relocate to the Deep South. The saddest part is? He left without saying goodbye. We never formally broke up…He just…disappeared…

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On a slightly happier note, one part of the story I told Mark was 100% true….Jack recently friended me on Facebook and in an extremely lengthy video chat over Skype, we reconnected. Jack recently married an incredibly attractive muscle bear and they’ve both made an amazing life for themselves in a gorgeous post-modern style apartment...During our chat, he made it clear that even though he found a new lover, he never forgot about me….and that he one day wishes that we could meet each other in person for the first time in more than twenty years.

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If there is a lesson to be learned in all of this, it’s that sometimes when other people tell you their own life experiences, it makes you look back on your own life and your own experiences you lived through and you end up not only helping the person talking to you, you also end up helping yourself.


Well, this is it! This is the last chapter I've written before I had to change over image sharing sites! I hope that soon, new chapters will come out regularly to continue the story of Thursdays!
 
I know it's been quite a while since the last chapter of Thursdays, but I plan to release the rest of my story in a more orderly fashion! I hope you like it!


Second Semester
Chapter Twenty-Three: Moving Out (Ryan’s Song)


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I know, I haven’t made a post in my iJournal for what seemed like eternities! A lot has happened since my last post here. I had ended the semester on a very good note, having made the Dean’s list for the semester, I also turned nineteen years old a few days ago. I can’t believe it, I’m 19….Even though sometimes I can be easily mistaken for someone in their mid-twenties!

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Despite all the things that were going on, the real reason why I haven’t really been updating this journal is because ever since I started my relationship with Logan….I really haven’t been spending a lot of my spare time at home. A lot of my time was usually spent either hanging out with friends, or Logan and I deciding to go do lunch together. My parents still have absolutely NO idea that I’m going out with anybody, let alone a former professor of mine and lately, they haven’t really been suspicious, though I believe that If I’m not careful enough, they might start to question things…

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I didn’t mention this, but the night where Logan and I first…did it…He had told me that should anything ever happen at my house, I was more than welcome to stay with him for as long as I want…I’ve NEVER been one to intrude on people’s lives and take advantage of their kindness….However lately, I’ve been finding myself more and more tempted to take up Logan’s offer….

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It’s not because anything bad is going on in my family….My parents didn’t wake up one day and decide to turn into homophobes and not support me...nothing like that is happening…The real reason why I might want to live with Logan is because it’s becoming increasingly difficult to juggle this relationship and family related activities….A decent example would be a week ago…I had to cancel a date with Logan literally the night before because my parents had scheduled a get-together over at my aunt’s house and before I could even drop the hint that I had plans that night, my mother flat out said “Your cousins haven’t seen you since last Christmas Eve, they’re really looking forward to seeing you again! They’ll be heartbroken if you don’t show up, so please come.”

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Luckily, this week saw no surprise plans or events, which made rescheduling the date rather hassle-free….Once again, I found myself exiting my car in front of the beautiful beachside manor of my lover…I knocked on the door and in no less than ten seconds, it opened…Logan stood there before me smiling, wearing a tight tank top and short and tight khaki shorts which left very little to the imagination in both the bulge and butt departments …. I extended my hand to give him a manly handshake, which he accepted….

Ryan: “Oh, fuck it!”

Before it turned into a passionate make-out session….

Logan: “It’s so good to finally see you again!”

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Logan: “So how have you been?”
Ryan: “I’ve been doing pretty good, thanks for asking.”
Logan: “Happy belated birthday, by the way! I knew it was a few days ago.”
Ryan: “Thank you Logan!”

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Logan walked to the side of the large flat-screen TV and picked up a long paper tube….

Logan: “I want to give you a present, Ryan! This was originally given to me as a gift by Silas a while ago, but….I figured that you would enjoy it very much…”

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I unfurled the large poster and was caught in a pleasant shock at what was on it….A large photograph of Logan, wearing nothing but a fur thong, mounted on the back of a horse. While I obviously found the depiction of a muscular, near-naked man to be arousing….The poster had a strange sort of tranquil beauty to it….As cliché as it sounded, Logan truly seemed one with nature…

Ryan: “I really don’t know where I’d put this poster, but I love it! The picture is absolutely gorgeous….Thank you so much for giving it to me!”
Logan: “Ah, it’s no trouble at all Ryan! You’re welcome!”
Ryan: “I never knew you were able to ride a horse, though!”
Logan: “Well, before that picture was taken, I hadn’t gone horseback riding in quite a few years. I’ve always wanted to get back into it again as a hobby….”

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Logan embraced me in an amorous hug as I laid my head down in his shoulders….Despite having killer traps, his shoulders still had a tenderness and a warmth to them….

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After the hug, I decided that it was finally time to talk about what was truly on my mind….

Ryan: “Logan….I’ve been thinking a lot about what you’ve told me when I first came over your house….Now, part of me seriously wants to take you up on your offer…to move in with you…"

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Logan: “Ryan…is anything going on at home?”
Ryan: “No….not at all…It’s just that…I feel it’s just becoming increasingly difficult to spend any sort of time with you due to family functions constantly coming up….Like for example, with what happened last week…We had such a nice day planned, we were going to hang out at your beach together during the daytime and at nighttime, we were going to watch a movie together and maybe fool around a bit…I even bought a speedo for the occasion! Then my parents wanted me to go to my aunt and uncle’s house…And I just couldn’t refuse. They would have been so disappointed in me if I told them no…..I figured that if I had lived with you….I wouldn’t have to worry about it….I’d be with you all the time….And we can live like a true couple…”

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Logan broke eye contact with me and let out a deep sigh….

Logan: “Ryan….this is a decision that you’re going to have to make on your own….If you truly feel like you’re ready to move away from your folks and live elsewhere….By all means, nothing is stopping you. It’s your decision and your decision alone to make….and I’m cool with either one…I just can’t decide for you. This is something you have to do on your own.
Ryan: “Thank you, Logan…for being so understanding.”
 
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I laid my right hand on his broad, muscular thigh and wrapped my left arm around his shoulders….My blue eyes made contact with his grey eyes...

Ryan: “Why don’t we go upstairs and go make up for lost time?”
Logan: “I thought you’d never ask, babe…”

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Logan led me upstairs to his bedroom…He grabbed me by my shoulders and we shared a passionate kiss together. He did a quick 180 and begun to take off his khaki short-shorts, confirming a suspicion I had since first arriving here, he wasn’t wearing any underwear…As he slowly removed his shorts, he had bent over and begun to flex and shake his glutes fervently, beckoning me to them….At that point, my hard-on was seconds away from bursting a seam in my cargo shorts.

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I unzipped my cargo shorts, stuck my hand into the open fly and wrestled out my member…At that moment, Logan handed me a single condom and a small bottle of lube before resuming his bent over stance….Without wasting any more time, I put on the condom, applied some lube, and I was ready for action…

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Logan: “GrrrrrrrrRRAAAAAGGGHHH!!!! DAMN!! It still surprises me how big you are…”

I started with gentle thrusts in and out of him….Logan had begun to moan and growl in pleasure as I continued to do the deed.

Logan: “Come on, Ryan….I know you can do better than that, Give me all you got….”

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That was all he had to say, I put the pedal to the metal and began to ravage him. The only two sounds I could hear were the frantic jingling of my wallet chain combined with the growling and roaring from Logan as I continued to give him the pounding of a lifetime….After a scant few minutes, I could feel it start to well up in my member….I tried to hold it in, savoring every moment of our love making….But with one final thrust….

Ryan: “OOOOOHHHHHHH DAMN……

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Logan: “Damn….My ass needed a good pounding….That was one of your best performances you ever gave me….”
Ryan: “Thank you, sweetie”

After he put his shorts back on, Logan and I started to make out once again…While kissing him passionately, I noticed something out of the corner of my eye in his bedroom…Something that either wasn’t there the last time I was in his room, or something that was there, but I paid no attention to...

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Ryan: “I had no idea you had a guitar….Do you play?”
Logan: “Yes….as a matter of fact, I do. Granted, I don’t think I’m very good at it…”
Ryan: “Oh come on, I think you’re better than you let on.”

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Logan picked up the Ovation acoustic guitar and begun playing….I was in absolute awe…What I expected to be a few basic chord structures turned out to be Logan playing the intro to Stairway To Heaven and absolutely nailing it….

Ryan: “Logan…that was beautiful…”
Logan: “That was the first song I ever learned how to play on the acoustic guitar….Wait right here, Ryan…I got something you’re gonna love.”

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Logan exited his room and almost immediately, I heard some rustling and thumping coming from the spare bedroom on the right….Within minutes he walked back in, holding a small amplifier in his right hand and an LTD bass guitar in his left hand…

Ryan: “You know how to play bass too?”
Logan: “Yep! While I learned how to play the guitar first, I’ve honestly had the most fun learning how to play this thing….Although I haven’t really played this thing in a hell of a long time….I’m shocked it’s even still in tune….”

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Logan plugged the instrument into the amp and begun to play “Another One Bites The Dust” and “Under Pressure” by Queen absolutely flawlessly. Then, he attempted to go into Roundabout by Yes, which had a few flubs here and there, probably because that song is normally played with a pick and Logan played fingerstyle….Logan just looked so natural with a bass guitar, as if he would fit in perfectly in a rock band. While he definitely wasn’t John Entwistle or Chris Squire, he could definitely play….

Ryan: “What can I say other than…..You definitely have talent!”

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Logan put the bass guitar down as I ran up to him and gave him a massive smooch on his lips…

Logan: Aww…thanks Ryan…It really means a lot to hear that from you.

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I had so wanted to spend more time with Logan….Unfortunatley, time was not on my side…I checked my phone and discovered it was almost 4:30….My parents were probably going to start making dinner any minute now…

Ryan: “So I guess…we’ll see each other soon?”
Logan: “Just name the time and place!”

I shared a romantic hug with Logan before walking out of his house and into my car….

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Whilst driving the short distance back to my home, my thoughts trailed to what I proposed earlier….Moving out of my home to go live with Logan…I initially wanted to come over to hear his opinion, only for him to tell me that it was purely up to me….My mind combed through the pros and cons of moving out…..The pros being that I can now always be with Logan and I get to live in his gorgeous mansion with a private beach…However, one of the major cons was that if I do that, I’m essentially abandoning my entire family....for what is a very selfish reason….
 
Second Semester
Chapter Twenty-Four: Revelation Part 1-Skeletons In The Closet


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The warm mid-June day started off like any other uneventful day….No one could have ever predicted that it was the day where my greatest secret was found out by another person….It all started with a simple, five word text message…

Mark: “Ryan, we need to talk.”

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Ryan: “Okay…do u want 2 meet up somewhere?”
Mark: “Plz meet me at my uncle’s house as soon as possible.”

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The next day, I drove up to Mark and Roy’s house…I knocked on his door and was greeted with a much different Mark De Luca than I had be familiar with. Gone was his jubilant smile and predominantly positive vibes. This time, he looked rugged, stoic and with a glint of anger and sadness in his eyes. He had replaced his youthful face with a full, long beard which made him look at least 20 years older than he really was….He was 19, but he looked almost 40…

Ryan: “So…..what was the big rush to get me here, man?”
Mark sighed and led me inside….

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Mark: “I guess I’m going to have to give it to you straight…..Ryan……..why are you fucking my professor?”

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Hearing those words come out of Mark’s mouth was like a shot to the head…He knew my secret…Strangely, despite the fact that I was surprised….I was not overly shocked. I’ve had the sinking feeling that he’d known for a while…..

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On the last day of class around late May, I had walked over to the building Logan taught his classes in to see if he was in his office, and sure enough, he was….and he had finished teaching his final class for the semester….Logan and I had conversed for a little bit before bidding each other a “have-a-nice-summer” goodbye kiss….

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During that make out session, Logan’s back was facing the entrance to his office while I could easily see through the thin windows of his office door....I had the sinking feeling for quite a while that someone that I knew was indeed looking through that window and recognized me…And to solidify it further, after Logan and I were done kissing and I had walked back to the parking lot to find my car, guess who was one of the only students in the parking lot besides me? Mark De Luca….

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This whole time, Mark was aware that something was going on between Logan Hardwick and I….When he questioned it to my face, the only option was to come clean…

Ryan: “Mark……It’s true….Logan and I, are….in a relationship. We’ve been together since around March of this year....I originally was just sexually attracted to him, but over time as I had gotten to know him more as a person, I had been completely enamored by his loving and caring personality….And one day, when we were both in the pool in the gym complex…we had come out to each other as gay…and the it all started from there…

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Mark suddenly became bewildered at the fact that I told him the full truth. I knew from the expression on his face that he was expecting me to deny it a few times before being truthful…He didn’t expect me to be so open about it….

Mark: “Okay, Ryan….just…what the fuck? I mean, Professor Hardwick is definitely a hottie, don’t get me wrong…but I would have never even thought about actually getting together with him! Even if I knew he was gay! And besides….you’re 19 years old! He’s FORTY-SIX! There is a huge age difference between you guys!!!”

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Ryan: “I know that the age difference is massive, but…I just have this connection with Logan on such a personal level…It’s like, I finally met my soulmate…”

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Mark: “So I guess that our relationship meant nothing to you? I thought you told me that I was your soulmate! Remember?! You were more than satisfied with me when we were going out!! We were happy together!! I was happy….with you….."

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Suddenly, tears had begun to well up in Mark’s eyes….

Mark: “Ryan…..I’m a wreck without you in my life. I’ve been holding out hope that after a while to cool down from what happened back in December, we’d be getting back together…And to see you going out with someone so much older than you, let alone one of my professors….It definitely hurts….And if you want my opinion, I honestly don’t think that your relationship with Logan is going to work out in the end…”
Ryan: “How is our relationship not going to work out in the end?! Everything is going great so far!”

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At that point, Mark had begun to get angry with me...

Mark: “Do I REALLY need to spell it out for you?! I’m not going to sugar coat this. Ryan, it can’t be more obvious that you are Professor Hardwick’s boy toy.”
Ryan: “BOY TOY?!
Mark: “Yeah, I said that! Think about it, man! He’s a 46 year old gay man going through a midlife crisis, and with the stereotypical “gay death” being 30, he knows that can’t be the lion that’s the head of the pride for much longer! So what does he do? Gets with someone much younger so he can live vicariously through you and feel young himself!"

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Quite predictably, I got pretty pissed off at what he was saying. He had absolutely no idea what the nature of Logan and I’s relationship is. Was he there in the same room when we confessed our feelings to one another?! NO!

Ryan: “Mark, you obviously have no fucking idea what you’re talking about. Logan is one of the sweetest, kindest, most loving men in the world. He truly cares about me…and I care about him! We’re very happy with each other!!! Why can't you see that!?”

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Mark: “You do know that I’m telling you this for YOUR benefit….I don’t want to see your heart get broken, Ryan…You know, no matter what happens…I still love you, Ryan….don’t forget that….
Ryan: “I still love you too, Mark….as a friend. But the romantic aspect of our relationship? That ship has sailed...and I honestly think you should move on, find another man to be with…You can’t live in the past forever…”
Mark: “I know I’m living in the past, it’s just that….I definitely regret my decision to end our relationship because of what happened….I’ve missed you, Ryan….I really have….”
Ryan: “Listen, if you honestly felt like you weren’t comfortable being in a relationship with another guy at that moment because of what happened…that was definitely your right and I honestly don’t blame you either…I mean, you were gay-bashed by a bunch of fuckheads that used to go to our high school…that’s a terrifying thing to go through…”

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Mark let out a stressed sigh….and turned away from me.

Mark: “Ryan….I can’t force you to do something you don’t want to do…so if you honestly feel like you’re happy being in a relationship with Professor Hardwick, then there’s nothing I can do to stop that….”
Ryan: “Thank you, Mark….”

Mark and I shook hands as opposed to hugging….

Mark: “But for the record, I personally think you should think about what I said…and ask yourself….”is this really what I want?”
 
Hey guys, I know that I keep on pushing back the addition of new chapters, but....I'm hoping that the next chapter of Thursdays will be written and ready to post sometime by January....A lot of stuff is going on in my life, I'm going through a lot of changes...Nothing bad or anything, but I've been really busy lately....
 
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