told a guy i don't want to hang out anymore.

[racer2438]

Yes you did, you don't need this kind of drama in your life. Need to find people that you are more into and have the confidence to be your self, and not have any head games.

This guy was confused and or just playing you. So since it was not that long you met him just file him under a general person you met and leave it at that. Life is to short for this kind of crap, so move onto better people..

 

[swerve]

I can kind of see where your friend might seem a little confused...

He was honest and upfront when asked -- although he still apparently cannot keep from flirting...

I guess you found it too frustrating -- I do like how you ended it though -- honestly and with no animosity...

 

[Sigma-taylor-E]

You did the right thing

 

[BostonPirate]

sounds like his closet door is going to be swinging back and forth for a while.

Find a man who knows what he wants and focus on him.

And you know.. this can be someone that you revisit in the future, if the feeling is there for you right now, to see where he is.

He will probably have a "secret" gay experience or two if he hasn't already, and you have let him know thats not your thing.

Good for you.

Remember... unrequited love hurts more at times than greiving the loss of a possibility. Protect your heart.

Hetero men go through this too, my straight friends say, because some women want to date for months at a time before intimacy just to make sure, and they often feel like a best friend without benefits...lol

good luck!

 

[KaraBulut]

did i do the right thing?

Yes.
......

 

[texan_slant]

You did the right thing, and also, you can't live with regret at "missed opportunity" because you always make the decision that seems right at the time.

Even if you see it as "missed opportunity", you just have to move on.

 

[hylas]

he sounds like a waist of time.

 

[Georgiadude]

you were open and honest with him. you told him how you felt and he kept sending you mixed messages. he's got issues and you more than did the right thing by walking away. he'll find someone else to play his little game with. they always do. its hard to walk away but sometimes its the right thing to do.

Steven.

 

[Sigma-taylor-E]

Thanks guys. I really feel supported! I wish I would've read these replies before last night. I felt terrible because I really do enjoy his company. He showed up at a party I was at last night. I couldn't resist him, we ended up hanging out all night and being very intimate and gazing and all that. I walked him home and he invited me in. I told him I couldn't stay long because I had a class the next morning. He gave me another drink and asked me to stay just for a snack. He made me toasted trisquits with cheese and tomatoes. And we watched Roman Polanskis "Repulsion". When the movie was over I said, "you're not gonna make me walk home now are you." And he scratched his face and said, "yeeeaaaah." And I walked home, alone, drunk. But that was the last time, I swear! I think we can hang out, I just can't step foot in his apartment. The thing that is driving me crazy is I know he's got feelings for me too. These fuckers are always catholic.

You...have broken your own credo young one...You Need to make a stand!!!!! YOU BROKE IT AND LOOK WHAT HAPPEND. NOW YOU ARE SAYING YOU WON"T AND (bolded) YOU WILL AGAIN

 

[rareboy]

Thanks guys. I really feel supported! I wish I would've read these replies before last night. I felt terrible because I really do enjoy his company. He showed up at a party I was at last night. I couldn't resist him, we ended up hanging out all night and being very intimate and gazing and all that. I walked him home and he invited me in. I told him I couldn't stay long because I had a class the next morning. He gave me another drink and asked me to stay just for a snack. He made me toasted trisquits with cheese and tomatoes. And we watched Roman Polanskis "Repulsion". When the movie was over I said, "you're not gonna make me walk home now are you." And he scratched his face and said, "yeeeaaaah." And I walked home, alone, drunk. But that was the last time, I swear! I think we can hang out, I just can't step foot in his apartment. The thing that is driving me crazy is I know he's got feelings for me too. These fuckers are always catholic.

You probably just lost the support of most of the people here who responded to your OP and validated your decision to avoid this guy.

He's just fucking with your head and probably enjoying it. Any guy that makes his 'friend' walk home drunk is no friend at all.

If you insist on seeing him again and again, I would suggest that you will be wasting your time and everyone else's if you think that all the readers in this forum will want to hear about every disastrous encounter you have while you still continue to nurture false hope that there is actually some chemistry between you.

Tell him that when he gets his head on straight, ....nawww....don't even meet up with him then.

There are about a billion people out there that would make a good friend. Unitl he grows up, he isn't one of them.

 

[KaraBulut]

The thing that is driving me crazy is I know he's got feelings for me too.

 

[Seasoned]

You absolutely did the right thing unless you like being teased to death.

 

[Georgiadude]

ugh.

sorry but.......we tried.

we've seen this played out a million times on JUB. now its a million and 1. these things dont end well. you had done the right thing and I was very proud/happy for you for doing it. you took a huge step backwards and opened yourself up to a giant mess. Its like the addict saying "just 1 more time & Im done with drugs. I swear after this time, I'm through". It doesn't happen. you keep going back for more and more. hoping your going to breakthrough to him. You also sent a giant mis signal to him. Now he's going to think its ok to contact you again. Well you opened the door and have yourself to thank for it. If you ask for advice and dont take it. people around here will move on pretty quick.

a TRUE friend wouldnt have made you walk home after drinking, especially that late. Hes a game playing jerk and you fell for it. I dont want to come across as being mean but sometimes people need to be woken up a bit so they can see what a mess they have gotten themselves into. been there myself and wish I would have listened to the people that were telling me I was making a BIG mistake. I didn't listen and set myself up for life long memories that really hurt sometimes.

Oh. btw. the Catholic comment wasn't appreciated either. Be careful who you insult. it may just be the people that are trying to help you the most.

good luck with things.

Steven.

 

[Georgiadude]

I appreciate that you understand your comment failed. I try not to get into religious/faith based discussions because its a very personal topic and can easily offend someone. even if it wasn't intended to do so.

any way. back on topic. some therapy may not be a bad idea. Ive found it helps to talk to someone and just get things out in the open. my best advice is to go back to your original plan. let it go. Last night I made the decision to stop contacting someone. Id love to be with him. hes the best kisser Ive ever been with. loves to snuggle and all of the fun stuff. but hes closeted, thinks hes bi, doesent ever plan on coming out. all the usual stuff. I just dont want to get drug into that again. It sucks. I like him but Im not going to waist time chasing someone that doesnt want to be caught. if that makes sense. I saw he was on line & I really wanted to IM him. Im planning on deleting his contact info so I wont be tempted again. should have done it right away.

I like music and find some songs fit situations. while this may not be perfect for your situation, give it a listen. it has a good message.

[ame]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=iqpnCwP8mBE[/ame]

hope things work out for you. best wishes

Steven.