Unexpected Intense Infatuation during hookup

[LutheranGuy]

So it's supposed to just be NSA / anon casual play and go, but bam, this guy is one in a thousand, immediately I know he's in a league where I'll never see him again, right? Just talking to him I felt nervous. Anyone else had this where it's just a hookup but he wowed you in several ways can't stop thinking about him? I try to let go, but there in my head he remains. Said he would think about hanging again, how long would you wait and would you text him or nah?

 

[swerve]

I would definitely recommending texting him.

There is no downside.

 

[IowaGuy]

Why not text him?

 

[TX-Beau]

So it's supposed to just be NSA / anon casual play and go, but bam, this guy is one in a thousand, immediately I know he's in a league where I'll never see him again, right? Just talking to him I felt nervous. Anyone else had this where it's just a hookup but he wowed you in several ways can't stop thinking about him? I try to let go, but there in my head he remains. Said he would think about hanging again, how long would you wait and would you text him or nah?

That's not really enough context for an assessment, but generally I don't see why a casual "had a nice time, love to do it again" text the next day would be wrong.

Of course if he told you explicitly that this was a one time deal, you probably won't get very far.

 

[Seasoned]

We're not machines even if we sometimes act as such. NSA, NSA, NSA and then emotions crop up and if they're mutual relationships can develop. I think you need to assess what a second hook up would mean for you in terms of crushing and how you'd think you'd handle it if it just led to frustration.

I had an anonymous encounter on July 6, 1983. We celebrated our 33rd anniversary this year. Life can be funny that way.

 

[eastofeden]

Well....it could turn out bad...which is true of anything and everything in life...but if you don't take a chance at least and see what happens....it is worse than failing I think.....

I wouldn't put how you feel on the table right away..and for all you know if you see him again it might not be the same for you..or it might be even better. Chemistry is what it is....so use your gut because if the chemistry is there for one or both of you..your gut will be a better gauge....

Though there is never a good way to prepare for rejection when you have strong feelings for someone else..at least intellectually you need to prepare yourself for the worst. It might not help you emotionally but at least if you engage your brain it will soften the blow just a bit.

 

[LutheranGuy]

I said to his face before he left hey if you ever want to hang again lmk and he said he'd think about it. Was "str8" still uncomfortable with guys and was weirded out about the general reputation of CL lol.

 

[TX-Beau]

OK that's a huge and crucial piece of info.

No matter how you feel about him you will not "love" him out of his closet.

He's off the table, un-datable until some point in the future when he comes to terms with himself. Fuck him all you want, but you're not getting anything but heartbreak if you fish for relationships in those waters.