Weight Loss - discussion

[Pringle]

Hi - I wanted to bring up the subject of weight loss.

My boyfriend used to be 21 stone - and through years of work has got down to 13 stone.

I didn't know him when he was at his biggest but diet and general appearance still plays a big part in our life and I am having to learn a lot about the issues that come with weight concerns. This is something that I had never given much thought to before - I am one of those annoying people who could eat loads as a kid and still had to run arround in the shower to get wet.

Anyway - he is beautiful and I love him very much and any no matter what size he is, that wouldn't change.

But I wondered if anyone else here has this struggle and if they would benefit from chatting with him.

Truth be told he still has issues with food and probably always will but I like to think of him as a success story because he has now had the confidence to go back to college (he didn't stick at it the first time) and has a sexy boyfriend (his words not mine. lol)

So are you larger than you want to be - or does your partner drive you insane with diets - thoughts please.

He did create a facebook group to discuss it - but he is the only memeber at the moment - wondered if there were any here that would want to share experiences.

 

[tagman]

Your partner is not alone when it comes to weight. Last April I weighed 225 pounds and today I weigh 165! Diet and exercise are the only way to lose the weight and keep it off. I anticipate that my weight will always be something I struggle with but I'm happy that I have taken the steps to lose the weight in a healthy way rather than going on a crash diet. I think I have a good chance of keeping most of the weight off

 

[Pringle]

Well done tagman - surely that is the answer - finding something that is sustainable that you can maintain forever - because it never goes away.

We have both joined a gym and that seems to be working pretty well - but like I said he lost most of the weight before I even knew him.

I am not sure how big 225 pounds is in real money - but do you think it held you back at all?

 

[bullwing413]

96% of people who lose weight gain it back. No one ever "struggled' with weight, they will always "struggle" with weight. Diet, exercise are the mainstays but even with these it's very, very hard to go more than 5 -10 years without gaining back weight even with Bariatric surgery. So, if you BF seems almost insane and obessive about diets and not gaining back weight -he has to be or he will gain the weight back -slowly but surely. The only way to beat it is to be absolutely compulsive about not gaining and keeping the calorie and carb intake low and the exercise high. You should never forget this, it's his only hope to stay 13 stone.

 

[codeerror]

21 stone=133kg = 294lbs
13 stone= 82kg = 182lbs

225lbs= 16 stone = 102 kg

21 to 13 stone is some accomplishment! How tall is he?

 

[PabloZed]

Wow, I don't mean any offense, but 300 pounds is huge no matter what the height.

 

[Pringle]

Hey thanks for the feed back.

Bullwing413 - yep I totally understand that this will be something he works on for the rest of his life. We do need to get some kind of balance so I don't go insane but I am as supportive as I can be. Truth is we all carry more weight (or carry the same weight less attractively) as we get older.

Codeerror - well he is a lot taller than me (see pic in profile) - I would say about 6'2". And it certianly is an accomplishment - which is why I think he is ready to talk to other people about the highs and lows of such a challenge.

PabloZed - no offence taken. Although I am not sure why anyone would take offence at stating the obvious. 300lbs is well and truely over weight and from the pictures I have seen he is no way near as cute as he is now.

The trouble is this achievement took over most of his life - and now he is trying to rebuild the bits that he missed out on - mates - career etc. Just going to be an ongoing battle I guess.

 

[PabloZed]

Well, it sounds like he won the big battle and that is shedding the heavy stuff. Even if he fluctuates a bit, I am sure he is mindful not to want to return to his heaviest. Hopefully he learned good habits - eating and exercise - that he can stick to.

 

[Persian89]

The only way to beat it is to be absolutely compulsive about not gaining and keeping the calorie and carb intake low and the exercise high. You should never forget this, it's his only hope to stay 13 stone.

How the fuck are you supposed to "exercise high" while keeping carb to a low?
Paradox...

 

[bullwing413]

You don't need to carb load to exercise. Protein and small smounts of carbs are sufficient. South beach diet amounts of carbs are fine. Once you've put on fat cells, all you can do is starve them skinny and what they really love are carbs. XS carbs are the best way for a former chubby person to gain weight.

 

[Persian89]

You do realize there is a reason why they call carbs our PRIMARY fuel?
I ask again, how the fuck is someone supposed to exercise without carbs, just sounds stupid.

 

[Red Storm]

You do realize there is a reason why they call carbs our PRIMARY fuel?
I ask again, how the fuck is someone supposed to exercise without carbs, just sounds stupid.

I don't get the low carb or no carb diets. Carb is critical when you work out. Of course it depends what carbs are those, I stick to brown rice, sweet potatoes, lentils, beans, WW bread ( limited), ff yogurt etc.

 

[BINOWGAYLATER]

96% of people who lose weight gain it back. No one ever "struggled' with weight, they will always "struggle" with weight. Diet, exercise are the mainstays but even with these it's very, very hard to go more than 5 -10 years without gaining back weight even with Bariatric surgery. So, if you BF seems almost insane and obessive about diets and not gaining back weight -he has to be or he will gain the weight back -slowly but surely. The only way to beat it is to be absolutely compulsive about not gaining and keeping the calorie and carb intake low and the exercise high. You should never forget this, it's his only hope to stay 13 stone.

gee Mr....... what did you do? read a book once? How can you state- so matter-of-factly - that this is the case? You don't say how much first hand knowledge you have about this - like are you a registered dietitian? or have you lost and regained 50-60 pounds two or three times... ???

Carbs have a varied effect on different people - some can look at a baked potatoe and gain 5 pounds.. others can eat 4 of them and it's not a problem.
I became a vegetarian - which meant that i ate about 4 times the amountof carbs i ate before - when i was alreaady very very big -- and the only other thing i did differently was start walking!! Are you listening PUPI 18 --
START WALKING - walk 100 yards if you can - gradually increase it -- I coudn't get around the block when i started -- but my mates at work took me out walking every lunchtime - and after i while - i was walking 2-3 miles a day. and EATING TONS AND TONS OF CARBS - and very very little protein - and i lost over 60 pounds - did i gain some of it back - yes - but i had other issues. and i gave up veggie diet and went back to eating meat !! but the fact is - that different things work for different people - - CODEERROR lost weight too - and he did it his way -- and it worked for him..
it's a HUGE accomplishment to lose "a whole person" in weight - even if it took 2-3 years - even if a person gains some back -- some metabolisms, are, after all pure shit -- when i was 18 - i could eat a horse a day - and 3,000 or more calories and i could NOT gain a POUND. things change over time... it is a struggle -- but i don't think its fair to say that 99% gain it all back.. just commend the guy for doing a GREAT JOB and leave it at that..
People have to be MOTIVATED to lose weight, quit smoking, or whatever -- it is they need to change -- THEY HAVE TO WANT TO - -when they get the proper motivation - it happens..

 

[samuelcain]

Ok, here's the deal the way I see it:

If someone is "genetically obese", meaning those who get fat easily, then he can't handle carbs. If he doesnt want to feel hunger while loosing weight, he has to either control carbs or if he wishes to go lowfat, he must eat small meals several times a day (like 6 times). It varies how much people can handle carbs, and it even changes during lifetime, but it might be very near zero grams. As BINOWGAYLATER mentioned just before, some can handle baked potatoes, some can't. I know my body can't handle carbs.

Eat well to loose fat, exercise to feel better. Evidence suggests that exercise has quite small role on weight loss. Clearly you can eat way more even on one sitting, than you can exercise! So fixing diet, means more than adding exercise imho. Exercise comes after weight loss. It even feels nasty for obese. And doing too much exercising can even make the weight loss slower. Especially if you are not eating enough.