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Well... I have one month to get out...

If i was you i would check out Job Corps its free they provide you with free rooming and job training. I don't know how old you have to be to sign up.

http://www.jobcorps.gov/home.aspx


But if it comes down to it you might have to join the air force i know you don't want to do that but sometimes we have to do things we don't want to do in life.I would rather see you in the air force then scrubbing toilets at a fast food place to make a dime. and you have to remember you have thousands of people completing over that crappy minimum wage paying job.
 
I just don't want to throw myself out with nothing to stand on besides my own two legs and important person information papers and such.

Thats why I've stuck around for so long.
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Look.

You're the one with the two legs.

You're the one who has pissed away a thousand chances.

Get ready to face the real world like an adult.

Were you just spoiled and indulged all your life?

Frankly, at this point, who cares if you like your job or if it is what you need to self-actualize.

Get work. Any decent, honest work. Learn that you're not just here to use up oxygen. Oh. and also get out there and volunteer for something in your spare time. Make something out of the years you plan on hanging around on the planet.
 
CEDMIn,
I hope you understand that we all do want you to succeed.
You're being fairly open and honest with us, and that's good.
Gather up all the important papers you need, and find a way to keep them safe. It sounds like you've moved fairly recently, and they're getting ready to move, again.

Your statement about working in small groups or alone is interesting, especially in light of your distaste for OTR truck driving - that's a limited interaction position where you only have a lot of contact with fuel stop attendants, restaurant help. A lot of the communication w/ dispatch is via Qualcomm. . . .

I'm not pushing you that way, you've already said not your cup of tea. But, if you run out of other options, and really don't care for armed services duty, this is an option - not something to do forever, but something to see the USA and get a little feel for what areas you might like to settle down in.
 
CedMIn,
Do you have a regular Driver's license? The program kk-lonewolf-37 went to was a training school that helped you get your CDL and placed.

3 week residence program - lousy motel, but it was a roof and bed and shower. Need to be drug free. Then you apprentice for several weeks with another driver before getting your own rig. And the rig becomes your home.

Check out some of the programs online - maybe one will be doable for you. It would help you have a roof over your head, a place to sleep, and a promise of a job when you graduate with your CDL. Better than a park bench.
 
As of very soon my life with be a survival quest. And surviving will be my main concern. Everything else second.
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What doesn't kill you makes you stronger.
 
This is so pathetic...stop making excuses and just make things happen. You are obviously being forced into a situation that you are not prepared for but instead of coming up with different reasons for why you cant do this or that, come up with ways that will get you whatever you need to survive.

Fuck man i'm 19 I moved out at 17 sure I had different circumstances and sure I found some great people to help me but I did what I had to do and bent over backwards to make it to where I felt comfortable to have a stable life.

Things get tough and this is when your true strength needs to come out.

I don't know how you let yourself get to this situation but I can only say this is your fault unless you have some medical disability. How can you have no way of supporting yourself at however old you are?
 
At the end of the day, none of us asked our parents to fuck without birth control.
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And in many cases it seems the better part of some people apparently ran down their father's leg once he'd pulled out.

So. Your parents owe you nothing after you reach the age of majority.

Don't pull existential malaise bullshit to justify why you can't work to support yourself.
 
CedMIn,
I urge you to look at some of the online training information for CDL driver's.

It could get you situated in a company-sponsored program quickly. They will pay your housing during training for CDL license - you pay your food. If you run short, maybe your family would help there, knowing you're trying your damndest. There's a payback period of 10-12 mos, but then you are up to full pay. In the mean time, you are single, have no real debts, you could be banking the pay that doesn't go to taxes and food, then judiciously invest in a laptop and cell phone. You can pay bills via web banking, so a PO box is about all you really need to accumulate you mail for you to pick up every month or so.

It will give you a sense of relief, knowing you have a place to sleep, money to pay for food, don't have to worry about transportation - your job will be under you 24/7 by and large. And, think of it as an adventure - you'll get to see different parts of the country in the different seasons, so you can decide areas you like.

If you really don't like it after a year or two, choose a location you like, focus on Monster.com, try for a job in the area you do like - by then, the economy should be on its way to recovery, and jobs more plentiful.

It won't take you a lot of exploration to check them out and find out about the programs.
 
Just curious, how old are you OP?

Don't listen to bitter commentators who say things along the lines of 'man up' -there's nothing manly or heroic about going out on your own or having some boring job... any dingbat can do it. It doesn't sound like you're particularly sociable, whether that's your personality or the result of being in a small town... therefore I wouldn't recommend showing up in some big city and hoping something happens, but it could.

I am very conservative when it comes to choosing a job future, I absolutely detest 'floundering around' periods in my life, so i've been going full speed with law school and am almost done now. It feels great not to have to worry about your job, really.

So in your case I'd really have to recommend, and I know you won't like it, but the Air Force. You can completely forget about all these petty concerns of rent and food, and you can start exploring your SELF rather than worrying about how you'll make ends meet. If life on the base ends up being boring and you can't find friends there, just spend your weekends and all your extra cash at some nearby city that's more exciting. You already have family connections with it that could help you out and when the training's done, you'll be set.
 
there's nothing manly or heroic about going out on your own or having some boring job... any dingbat can do it.
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What a load of crap.

Apparently a lot of infantile guys aren't capable of doing it.

It is manly. It is heroic. Hiding out in your parents' basement playing videogames and playing the role of the frail sensitive child who doesn't care about money or just figures they can sit on their ass for the next 25 years while they figure out what they want to be when they grow up is not. Manly. Or heroic.

Someone going through law school who is shilling for the airforce sounds more like a recruiter for a cult.

Like I stated in my first post, I have asked people I know of if they would be willing to help out by:

1. Food (I have the money to get food myself to last a month or more)

2. Seeing if they would let me stay in a safe place (Shelter, which I cannot get myself at the moment).

3. Giving me at least a month to get a job (I would be able to get most of what I need for a job myself).

4. Once I have a job and at least have my first pay check, if I am no longer welcomed (sic) to stay (for whatever reason), I can and will have what I need to get a small cheap place of my own (Assuming there is an area with cheap places).

5. Success.
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So you plan on going from leaching on one set of people to leeching off another.

I think part of the reason you posted your thread was a hope that someone out here would just write you a cheque.

The sad thing is that there are so many out there just like you. Always looking to someone else to do the heavy lifting.

Look in your pants. They're called balls, use them.

You should be spending your time out on the streets lining up work and finding a room to stay in so you'll be ready when your shit gets thrown out onto the lawn.
 
I'm not sure what the purpose of the original post was, but I'm guessing it was one of four things (or a combination).

* actually looking for good advice on how to proceed
* a request for attention/pity
* looking for some negative attention
* hoping to get an offer for a place to live until you "get on your feet"

You got the first three. Plenty of both. Maybe you got some PMs offering you the fourth, as well. I personally don't think I could sponge off someone else very long, but there are people out there who think work is for saps, and others who feel best about themselves when giving to those who take. So if someone offers to put a roof over your head, food in your mouth, and to clean up after you, I'm not gonna judge.

Whatever it is, here's hoping you find it.

Lex
 
DonQuixote said:
CEDMIn,
I hope you understand that we all do want you to succeed.
You're being fairly open and honest with us, and that's good.
Gather up all the important papers you need, and find a way to keep them safe. It sounds like you've moved fairly recently, and they're getting ready to move, again.

Your statement about working in small groups or alone is interesting, especially in light of your distaste for OTR truck driving - that's a limited interaction position where you only have a lot of contact with fuel stop attendants, restaurant help. A lot of the communication w/ dispatch is via Qualcomm. . . .

I'm not pushing you that way, you've already said not your cup of tea. But, if you run out of other options, and really don't care for armed services duty, this is an option - not something to do forever, but something to see the USA and get a little feel for what areas you might like to settle down in.
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Why are you pushing OTR driving so hard.
It sucks.
Always did and always will.
Now though you work for companies thare the rolling Wal-mart or McDonalds type paying jobs on wheels. Worse than ever.
In fact you can work at McDonalds shit on your own toliet, sleep in your own bed every night and make more money then sitting around in a bullshit truck stop.
Or you can run as a team with some stinky, skank stranger redneck you don't know who may drive like shit and live together is a stupid ass small cubicle of a sleeper and make more money over a single driver,
I know I have done that for some years, and though there are fond memories of it, it wears thin and the OP is correct it is one lonely ass job.
Nothing like spending a weekend without a load in some dusted dirt parking lot in bum buck tiny town Minnasota in Jan staring at the fields miles from the nearest anything listening to the engine chug trying to stay warm looking at your watch and see that its only 2 PM and you ain't going anywhere until Monday afternoon, nor are you making any money.
It sucksss............... Repeat after me it sucks............ Truck driving over the road sucks shit.............. always has and always will.

Time to take even more of these rigs off the roads and put them on the rail. Driving sucks Swift is shit, JB is shit, Schneider is shit, its all shit, Marten and HEartland Shit all sucks sucks so bad.

OTR Sucks............. it just is a pit of hell get a fucking job doing Lot & lobby for $7.24 a hour at Taco Hell and you will be better off..................... ](*,) rant is over, sorry
 
I wasn't trying to sugar coat it, but I also was making positive suggestions, and this was one way to check out different parts of the country, see where he might like to live long term and, HE needs to be somewhere solid in less than 30 days.

The sponsored trucking school was an option that, while it might cost him a year of his life, wasn't going to cost him a 4 year commitment with time overseas in a military action war zone. He's thinking more favourably on USAF now, and that's great.

Yes, I pushed, only to get him to consider things that were better than being on the streets, and that he could do in the timeframe considered, with some reasonableness of having a roof over his head.

It's not an easy life, no question about it. It can be a way to see the country.
 
Do not join the Military! The people who are making this suggestion are doing so to serve their own purpose. Do you want to be stuck in Afganistan feeling like you may die today? Finding a job, a roomate and some independance from your family is much better than becoming a killer for the goverment. Do your best to find a job, the rest will fall into place.
 
Good luck, CedMln. I hope everything works out.
 
All this "tough love" stuff is a bunch of crap. This "rugged individual" bullshit is some kind of self-stroking ego trip and the real world doesn't work that way for most people.

It is sad that your family is putting you out the door without helping you make plans to go your own way. There is absolutely no benefit to this part of your life being a struggle or even a hassle. Lots of people have great supportive families who they communicate well with, they go out on their own when they are ready, and they all still go on to pay all their own bills and make their own way responsibly.

I don't know if there is more to the story with your family, but that ship has sailed anyway.

So, mostly right now I think it is a question of focus and some knowledge. If there is any valid criticism, you seem to be giving up on some workable options too quickly. I don't think this is laziness, probably just overwhelmed by having to figure it all out. Here's what I mean about focus - you're worried about your own future but not too panicked over doing something about it. Imagine for a moment if you were the only parent of a baby with a hole in its heart and you had to figure out how to get the money for surgery. You'd be driving a truck tomorrow, working at a department store that evening, and you wouldn't think twice about it because you'd be focussed on saving the kid's life. Well, you don't deserve any less.

You need to apply for at least two jobs a day between now and the end of the month. You do not need to pick a dream career position. Last time I checked, once you pick a job there is no law that makes you stay there forever. So, fill in some time on your resume and earn some cash.

Now, knowledge; how to pay bills you can learn in a half hour at the bank. Go in and tell them you haven' t had to do it before and ask them what they need to set up your account so you can make the payments. It is pretty simple.

Renting somewhere; does your town have a landlord-tennant board or something? The city probably has regulations covering rental situations that will list your rights and obligations. Spend an afternoon researching this. One afternoon between now and the next month, and you will know how to sign a good lease without getting screwed over.

Employment; yes, in a month you can get a job and start working. Look online for job postings. Think of every street you've gone down and every business on it. Look in newspapers for job listings. Apply often. Customize your resume and cover letter EACH TIME so that your resume is rearranged to highlight the skills which are requested in EACH job posting. Check out a local employment office. Also, explain to your mom that you'll check in for messages to see if you are receiving interview requests. She is not going to just throw away your messages unless she is truly an asshole, and you said this was only a communication problem, not an asshole problem. So, keep using that number for your resume unless you get a different one sooner.

Umm. That's it for now.
 
What seems to be missing is both the emotional content in this missive as well as a lack of motivation. Any of these tasks could have been undertaken over the last few years. Have you seen a mental health professional, your detachment suggests several things too me. Contact the nearest community Mental Health office please for your continued good health.

And as for the rest good luck. If you have a passport and no criminal record right now you can come and work the 2010 winter olympics, they are very short on everyone.
 
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