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Were you scared when YOU first found out YOU were gay?

1) I never found out.

2) I would only be afraid if I found out I was str8. That would men I am 100% brainwashable and a total faggot.
 
Wow this thread is educational for me...

The responses show that reactions to first discovering ones homosexuality can vary GREATLY. From it's no big deal at all .........all the way to I'd rather die than be gay......
 
larryng said:
When you first found out you were gay , were you scared, confused, ashamed or felt guilt?

The reason I ask is that ; when I first found out I was gay, I took to it "like a duck to water". No long protracted feelings of guilt , shame, fear or anything else.

Am I in the minorty in feeling like this?
Click to expand...

I’m not sure if you are in the minority, but I’m afraid me and you are on opposite sides of the fence. When I first found out I was into guys I was all of the above (afraid, ashamed, guilty, confused) and in some cases I still am. I have now figured out that I am bisexual, but it doesn't make it much less difficult to deal with.

It took me 3 years to finally admit it to myself that I liked guys. I still have a lot of soul searching to do to work up the courage to admit it to others. (Which will be done when I'm ready. Not anytime soon, by the looks of things)
 
I mean I never "found" out I guess I can say I started to gain an attraction to men at age 12 and was a bit confused because I used jack off and be attracted to women but then it was both and then by age 15 it just became men.

In Highschool I never even though I was gay because through media and the 2-3 gay boys people knew were gay I didn't act like them. You know I played ball with the fellas while they was playing double dutch with the girls. I wore baggy jeans they wore capri pants etc etc

So I just thought it was phase till I was about 19 and I couldn't count how many men I've been sexually involved with but I know for sure I've only had sex with 3 girls.

So when I came out of denial and accepted my sexuality a bit I became depresed because I just didn't know how to take it from there. You got to understand I'm Jamaican American from a lower income neighborhood in the bronx and it's place filled with ignorance (grew up in the projects). It's propbably not an excuse but I had a gay cousin(only met him as kid twice) that got shot and killed in Jamaica because he was gay.

but then I got horny needed some ass and on my pursuit of ass I realize theres alot of other gay guys like me who are what they call "undercover brothers" (On the down low). So I just accepted that as life like yea I'm a just fuck niggaz and not tell anybody about it.

But then I went back to college (I droped out) became a theatre major (Yea very gay hahaha) and became friends with people who aren't closted but I still was because I had that "gay nigga from the hood" mentality.

So I graduated college and yes I am closer to my straight friends then gay friends because we just have more in common in terms interest not relating to sex and when you hang with them you start subconcously going to the same spots trying to get with girls too maybe to save face or just because you are that horny and you just want anything to fuck.

And then after a few situations, conversations and circumstances with girls and gay guys that I'm not going to get into I realized I'm just wasting these bitches time and most importanly my own.

Damn that was a bit of rant sorry I'm high as hell right now
 
I was really depressed at first but now I'm SOOOO happy!
:D
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The only thing to fear is being heterosexual and having to make due with penisless/scrotumless sex partners who have nothing fun for you to play with, suck, and stick up your butt. I pity straight males, as they have no idea what they've been cheated out of.
 
Homophobia can hurt down to the bone .......no matter how secure you are with your homosexuality........

I can't imagine how much MORE homophobia can hurt if you is already struggling with your homosexuality.
 
larryng said:
I took to it "like a duck to water". No long protracted feelings of guilt , shame, fear or anything else.
Click to expand...

The same here. All around tried their best to cause me guilt, shame, fear to God, and so on. But the simple sight of cock beats all that off. Literally.
 
Not scared. More confused. Feelings of "If I'm gay, I think I should've known, right?" And I was a bit worried about how some people would react. But not scared, no.

Lex
 
As a gay teen growing in the 50's when the word gay was often taboo. Came to accept the fact was gay and still gay man today.
 
Well, I first realized it when I was 11. The thought of losing my family and having everyone hate me because of who i'm attracted to wasn't exactly an invalid concern.
 
I was confused. I couldn't understand why I got more pleasure out of looking at guys in the locker room, than I did looking at Playboy magazine with my buddies.

And I felt like I was the only guy in the world who was gay. There was no internet in the 1970's, nobody I could confide in and reach out to for support.

Once I finally figured out that I was gay, and it was not a bad thing, I was secretive about it for a long time. I feared that my father would throw me out of the house, and my mother would reject me.

The first person that I came out to was my first crush, my pal Vincent. I was so in love with him, that I couldn't hide it anymore. And, by some stroke of luck, he felt affection for me too. Vince was my first love and my first lover.

It was many years before I came out to my parents. I shouldn't have worried. Both Mom and Dad were initially disappointed, but they did not reject me. They would later be very supportive of my second love, Dave.
 
I knew I was sexually attracted to guys at age eight.....this was in the early eighties.......no internet no nothing...

I didn't know that I was "gay" until I was 11 years old......thats when I found out there were others out there like me.

I was 14 when I went to the gay and lesbian center in my town and met the first people I knew were gay. Prior to 14, I 've never met another person that I knew was gay.
 
Nope I wasn't. Ive always felt its normal to be looking at guys and never question why Im sexually attacted to them since i was a little boy
 
I knew I liked boys since I was very young. I thought it was normal until people put a name to it. GAY. I wasn't scared, just frustrated and ashamed. Here I am, in a world of AIDS, hatred and homophobia. Wonderful. It didn't help that every one around me was Gay bashing, and I figured I'd be disowned if I ever breathe a word about it. And of course my family is Catholic.....

Maybe if I had just ONE Gay friend back then to talk to, to help me... but sadly no. I thought I was the only gay boy in 1000 miles. No internet like today... boy, THAT would have made a HUGE difference in my teens.

Sadly a lot of time had to pass for me, but it did. Life is better now.
 
I wasnt really anything when I found out. A little guilty at not being normal I guess. I tried for a long time to convince myself it wasnt important and at some points I even thought I was asexual. I guess in my mind ive always accepted it just never thought anyone else would. Now im out and have a beautiful relationship and have never been happier.
 
Thanks again to all who shared from the heart.

The thread is extremely educational to me and for lots of others who clicked on here;Im sure.

Not having the internet (isolation) when you're first discovering your homosexuality can complicate things.

I was FOURTEEN when I first met another person that I knew was gay.
 
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