What’s the point?

[thirseyevision]

I feel like I’m alone in this
I’m a 32 year old guy I was in the army for 7 years and now I’m living at my parents place here in BC. The only source of income I have rn is from a rehabilitation and vocational pragram through the VAC. I just paid off my debt so all I have is my phone bill and pitch in like $800 for groceries a month. I have a complicated situation with my driver license to work out because I got a dui 3 years ago in MB but now I live in BC and it’s been a year and a half nightmare of getting told to talk to the next guy to try and finish an alcohol course here so I can send it to mb so they can approve that I’ve done the course and I can get an ignition interlock installed into a vehicle I don’t have so I can get my license. I have no friends besides a couple on Snapchat. I don’t have anyone to talk to, I am constantly on the verge of grabbing my 7mm rem mag and going for a walk to take the long nap. I just don’t know what to do with my life.
I just don’t see a reason to keep going, I have no clue in what I want to do besides to stop what I am feeling now

 

[Alex Rose]

come on there must be some reason you keep waking up each morning. My life isn't any better and I don't know what the fuck my future looks like, I'm very similar to you all I have is parents and live with them. But suicide, is the last thing on my mind!!
Just think about how devasted your family would feel if you would leave this earth!
I hope you get help and reach out to someone you love!!!

 

[thirseyevision]

come on there must be some reason you keep waking up each morning. My life isn't any better and I don't know what the fuck my future looks like, I'm very similar to you all I have is parents and live with them. But suicide, is the last thing on my mind!!
Just think about how devasted your family would feel if you would leave this earth!
I hope you get help and reach out to someone you love!!!

I do have appointments with theorpists and such but every time I talk to them I feel like I’m laying down the most blank slate , with nothing to see. Because I can’t talk to them, I don’t know who I am,

 

[MusicMan321]

The best for you is to get some help and talk to someone like a therapist and they might be able to help with your life. You don't wanna ruin your own life hopefully you'll get the help you need and be ok

 

[KaraBulut]

I feel like I’m alone in this
I’m a 32 year old guy I was in the army for 7 years and now I’m living at my parents place here in BC. The only source of income I have rn is from a rehabilitation and vocational pragram through the VAC. I just paid off my debt so all I have is my phone bill and pitch in like $800 for groceries a month. I have a complicated situation with my driver license to work out because I got a dui 3 years ago in MB but now I live in BC and it’s been a year and a half nightmare of getting told to talk to the next guy to try and finish an alcohol course here so I can send it to mb so they can approve that I’ve done the course and I can get an ignition interlock installed into a vehicle I don’t have so I can get my license. I have no friends besides a couple on Snapchat. I don’t have anyone to talk to, I am constantly on the verge of grabbing my 7mm rem mag and going for a walk to take the long nap. I just don’t know what to do with my life.
I just don’t see a reason to keep going, I have no clue in what I want to do besides to stop what I am feeling now

When I see situations like what you described above, I picture someone with a bunch of bricks piled on top of them. What you're feeling is that, "I want all these bricks off me". The reality is that you'll have to remove the bricks one by one until you feel like you can breathe again. Harming yourself is just going to dump all your bricks onto your family and friends.

It sounds like one of the key things that needs to get resolved is to get your license back so that you can resolve the other issues. Getting transportation should be your first priority.

Working with a therapist is an important start. It would be better if you can work with a therapist who works with vets. An organization like Wounded Warriors might be able to help with a referral.

Your biggest enemies at the moment are silence and isolation. Overcoming the transportation issue is a big step. Rebuilding your social network, so that you have people that you can talk with and do things with is going to be a key piece of resolving your feelings of isolation. Then, getting employment and financial stability will follow.

 

[thirseyevision]

When I see situations like what you described above, I picture someone with a bunch of bricks piled on top of them. What you're feeling is that, "I want all these bricks off me". The reality is that you'll have to remove the bricks one by one until you feel like you can breathe again. Harming yourself is just going to dump all your bricks onto your family and friends.

It sounds like one of the key things that needs to get resolved is to get your license back so that you can resolve the other issues. Getting transportation should be your first priority.

Working with a therapist is an important start. It would be better if you can work with a therapist who works with vets. An organization like Wounded Warriors might be able to help with a referral.

Your biggest enemies at the moment are silence and isolation. Overcoming the transportation issue is a big step. Rebuilding your social network, so that you have people that you can talk with and do things with is going to be a key piece of resolving your feelings of isolation. Then, getting employment and financial stability will follow.

I had a bit of a breakthrough with my licence today, I’m hoping I can ride this wave and continue to make progress.

 

[RisingGay]

As a 62 year old man who has been struggling with his homosexuality all his life and lifelong failure with women, who was put on disability for complex PTSD by my psychiatrist over 10 years ago, has no money and is completely financially dependent upon the disability check and my parents and brother, and has thought about suicide almost every single day for 20 years, I can somewhat relate to you and your situation. But I know I can't cause that kind of pain to my parents and brother, which is what has stopped me from going through with these suicide fantasies. And biweekly work with my therapist is helping as well. I'm glad you are making some positive steps with your license, but I would definitely encourage you to seek out a therapist of some kind, and try and focus on others, including family, as much as possible in your mind. Focussing on others is the key. Good luck my friend!