I suppose I have a sense of familiarity and security here because it's where I grew up, but other than that, I've had it. I kind of hate this city now. It's noisy and dirty. Too many fucking people and I find myself separating them into categories so I can hate them: the hipsters and their tofu brains and no futures, the fuck-me shoed cunts who think everybody's dying to screw them, the Mexicans who think everybody's just dying to hear their music 24 hours a day, the fucking tourists who gather in the middle of the sidewalk and TALK REAL LOUD with their mouths full of pizza because New York is their second home, man.
Not good to hate people because of the group they belong to. It's so much better to hate them for who they are individually.
Mostly, though, I'm sick of concrete, bricks and glass. I want to see the stars. I want to see green. I want to hear more than one lonely cricket on summer nights. I'm geared toward the natural world, and I truly believe the lack of access to it is bad for my mental and even physical health.
And then there's the cost. I can't afford it. There are plenty of places where I could live off my SSI and never have to work.