What kind of Christmas tree do you have?

[man_crazy]

My family and I just have a fake one. We had a real one once a long time ago... there were so many pine needles left over so we decided not to have another one. But it was nice though.

 

[Nonimus]

A genuine Norweigan-Blue plastic one.

 

[Nonimus]

i wish i had a picture of the outside of my house. it's pretty crazy... there are like 4 or 5 blow ups.

perhaps best left unsaid.

 

[BrandonSBCA]

A fake tree. Came with the lights already on it.

 

[Brijan]

A fake tree. Came with the lights already on it.

Ours too!
My parents bought it just last year...

 

[yvrpalms]

we buy a real one.. love the scent it makes in the house..

 

[Syn]

for a while my family does the fake tree, then sometimes we go out and buy a real one but i think the place we got it went out of business so they just stick with the real one. But it's pretty, white lights with silver and purple ornaments. It goes with the decor of the living room.

 

[Tongue_Me]

As Fake as the person who put it up - me

In about a months time it's going to be gathering dust for another year. Am I alone in thinking that this time of the year is quite bizarre?

 

[mega]

I found a pink marabou xmass tree at my local Ace Hardware store. If I was going to be home this year I would have bought it... you can't go wrong with marabou!

 

[TaigaStar]

When I was little, we had a plastic one; when I was a teenager, Mom and I started getting real ones. Now we're back to the plastic ones, but when I do the tree with the Victorian theme going on, it looks so cool that you can't tell the tree was $19.99 in Target!

 

[thermodynamics]

My Dad always got a Frasier or Balsam Fir. Spectacular trees. Here in my apartment, I have a 2' fiberoptic fake tree, and I also have a 2' Italian Stone Spruce--it's a living tree--in a nice little pot, and the fact that it's living means it's not a fire hazard!

 

[mega]

^Sweet Jesus!! Another attack on Christmas!!
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[_AJ_]

Fake
my little sister decorated it mostly

 

[Smitho]

None

 

[RationalLunacy]

A genuine Norweigan-Blue plastic one.

The Norwegian Blue sketch:
A customer enters a pet shop.


Mr. Praline: 'Ello, I wish to register a complaint.


(The owner does not respond.)


Mr. Praline: 'Ello, Miss?


Owner: What do you mean "miss"?


Mr. Praline: I'm sorry, I have a cold. I wish to make a complaint!


Owner: We're closin' for lunch.


Mr. Praline: Never mind that, my lad. I wish to complain about this parrot what I purchased not half an hour ago from this very boutique.


Owner: Oh yes, the, uh, the Norwegian Blue...What's,uh...What's wrong with it?


Mr. Praline: I'll tell you what's wrong with it, my lad. 'E's dead, that's what's wrong with it!


Owner: No, no, 'e's uh,...he's resting.


Mr. Praline: Look, matey, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.


Owner: No no he's not dead, he's, he's restin'! Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, idn'it, ay? Beautiful plumage!


Mr. Praline: The plumage don't enter into it. It's stone dead.


Owner: Nononono, no, no! 'E's resting!


Mr. Praline: All right then, if he's restin', I'll wake him up! (shouting at the cage) 'Ello, Mister Polly Parrot! I've got a lovely fresh cuttle fish for you if you
show...


(owner hits the cage)


Owner: There, he moved!


Mr. Praline: No, he didn't, that was you hitting the cage!


Owner: I never!!


Mr. Praline: Yes, you did!


Owner: I never, never did anything...


Mr. Praline: (yelling and hitting the cage repeatedly) 'ELLO POLLY!!!!! Testing! Testing! Testing! Testing! This is your nine o'clock alarm call!


(Takes parrot out of the cage and thumps its head on the counter. Throws it up in the air and watches it plummet to the floor.)


Mr. Praline: Now that's what I call a dead parrot.

Owner: No, no.....No, 'e's stunned!


Mr. Praline: STUNNED?!?


Owner: Yeah! You stunned him, just as he was wakin' up! Norwegian Blues stun easily, major.


Mr. Praline: Um...now look...now look, mate, I've definitely 'ad enough of this. That parrot is definitely deceased, and when I purchased it not 'alf an hour
ago, you assured me that its total lack of movement was due to it bein' tired and shagged out following a prolonged squawk.


Owner: Well, he's...he's, ah...probably pining for the fjords.


Mr. Praline: PININ' for the FJORDS?!?!?!? What kind of talk is that?, look, why did he fall flat on his back the moment I got 'im home?


Owner: The Norwegian Blue prefers keepin' on it's back! Remarkable bird, id'nit, squire? Lovely plumage!


Mr. Praline: Look, I took the liberty of examining that parrot when I got it home, and I discovered the only reason that it had been sitting on its perch in the first place was that it had been NAILED there.


(pause)


Owner: Well, o'course it was nailed there! If I hadn't nailed that bird down, it would have nuzzled up to those bars, bent 'em apart with its beak, and
VOOM! Feeweeweewee!


Mr. Praline: "VOOM"?!? Mate, this bird wouldn't "voom" if you put four million volts through it! 'E's bleedin' demised!


Owner: No no! 'E's pining!


Mr. Praline: 'E's not pinin'! 'E's passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! 'E's expired and gone to meet 'is maker! 'E's a stiff! Bereft of life, 'e rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed 'im to the perch 'e'd be pushing up the daisies! 'Is metabolic processes are now 'istory! 'E's off the twig! 'E's kicked the
bucket, 'e's shuffled off 'is mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisibile!! THIS IS AN EX-PARROT!!

 

[doctorsun]

Fake, not pre-lit. I like lighting it myself. I make it as bright and tacky as I possibly can. Then, we add all of out family ornaments. I have some that are as old as I am (21). Our tree is always beautiful.

We always used to have a real one, but it just became too much of a hassle so we caved in and bought a cheap fake one. We got a really nice fake one a couple years ago and you can't tell it's fake at all.

 

[Michael Luc]

Artificial, but I like it.

 

[gsdx]

If I were to put my tree on the floor and stand beside it, the top of the tree would barely reach my knee. I set it on a small plant stand that my father made over 40 years ago.

The only other decorating I do is to set up my mother's North Pole village which I made her 20-odd years ago. I don't celebrate Christmas anymore, but I set up the village for my Mom.

 

[tx_doc]

fake tree. the real ones make my boyfriend's eyes large and puffy and I can't sleep in bed with him because of the sneezing.

 

[hotdog1846]

I have a medium-sized artificial tree. I put white lights on it -- very simple and classic -- and decorate it with keepsake ornaments I've collected over the 40 years I've been on this planet. Some are ornaments that friends and relatives gave me, some are ones I liked and bought for myself, and some come from a family tradition we had going for years where we'd get several different ornaments and have fun figuring out which ornaments fit each other's personality.

It's bittersweet, putting up the tree. Makes me think back over the years and of the passage of time. Everything is so ethereal and temporary. "All this too shall pass."