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Let's row that boat closer to the shore. The deep waters are more turbulent.No need to tell me more, you and I are on the same boat
I started this year with an idea to take more chances and see how it goes. Then BAM! this foreigner texted me on a second Christmas day and still comes back. I would want to drop the bag and forget it all sometimes. It's ok to be single.
This is true. I'm expressing my frustration and can only look realistically at the current situation. It was like a self-dellusion for some time. I will not cut the contact, but have very little hope that it may work out. The only thing I can do is learn from the experience and grow. Grow and live more to meet new people live.I'm sorry Natello.
Even if there was some serious interest at first, keeping it alive only through text messages is very difficult.
(Or meeting them when you're dead!)
That's because 80% of communication is nonverbal. Facial expression and body language, tone of voice, context, even scent, everything you can't get on a digital device.Well, that's definitely better than meeting new dead people.
Really, though, most people find it difficult to navigate how frequently to text/chat (what's magically "too much"? what's magically "too little"?) and what interest/feeling there might be on the other end, so you're far from alone. As you say, take it as a learning experience, you met someone knew and their vibe, learned about them, those are far, far, far from the worst things on the planet and also far from the worst ways to be spending your time.
Yeah. Also, time difference plays a role. In some rare cases, maybe it works, but it takes a lot from both parties to make it work.
This is true. It's difficult to understand how much interest there is after all. I guess, the midset of "It might work out" is not the best one when approaching a new relationship. Especially, over text, when the experience is more draining than fulfilling. Spending more time with family and friends, pets seems a better idea.Well, that's definitely better than meeting new dead people.
Really, though, most people find it difficult to navigate how frequently to text/chat (what's magically "too much"? what's magically "too little"?) and what interest/feeling there might be on the other end, so you're far from alone. As you say, take it as a learning experience, you met someone knew and their vibe, learned about them, those are far, far, far from the worst things on the planet and also far from the worst ways to be spending your time.
(Signed, - AT&T Customer Retention Department. <-- Just kidding. 
But I mean the rest!)
I wouldn't agree with that. If you think that way, you're a pessimist vs. an optimist, and people who tend to think negatively always seem to end up finding ways for that perception to come true (like, "if all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail") or attract other negative and dour folks. Keep your optimism.
Maybe you're just feeling a bit sorry for yourself right now, and that's understood, but no reason to avoid texting just from this experience or changing where you want to spend your time. Maybe look to meet someone who's local (maybe I missed it, but I still wasn't quite clear on whether that was the case in your example? Or you're distance-apart?) and the texting can be a wonderful thing in-between in-person "meets for coffee", joining a group with a common interest, eventual dating, etc.? Don't abandon the medium because of one bad experience.
You don't have to be a pessimist. Realistically, chances to make it work through text when both people are separated by a big distance are slim. Especially, when only one party is more engaged. It's just easy to get disillusioned by hope and "What if?". Once the bubble bursts, reality hits and you feel like emotions and infatuation have led you too far. You are right, wellbeing comes first.I understand your reasoning about being a pessimist, but sometimes if feels safer to protect your feelings
Texting can be a medium to keep in touch, nothing more IMO.
On the other hand, letting go opens up opportunities to meet someone more engaged and interested to know you. Especially, in real life. Texting for years with someone not that interested may have a worse effect than an instant rejection by someone you see with your eyes. But I do understand that with the right mindset and approach it can work for some. I think, my personal problem is emotional investment. I tend to get invested and really show interest until I realise it was mostly me trying to make it work. In most cases, it's sexting and then ghosting.I wouldn't agree with that. If you think that way, you're a pessimist vs. an optimist, and people who tend to think negatively always seem to end up finding ways for that perception to come true (like, "if all you have is a hammer, everything looks like a nail") or attract other negative and dour folks. Keep your optimism.
Maybe you're just feeling a bit sorry for yourself right now, and that's understood, but no reason to avoid texting just from this experience or changing where you want to spend your time. Maybe look to meet someone who's local (maybe I missed it, but I still wasn't quite clear on whether that was the case in your example? Or you're distance-apart?) and the texting can be a wonderful thing in-between in-person "meets for coffee", joining a group with a common interest, eventual dating, etc.? Don't abandon the medium because of one bad experience.
You described my whole life here
