Why do they stop chatting when...

[MindBlast]

Well a lot of younger guys want a guy they find sexually attractive.

I don't think it's racist to be attracted to one race more than others. It IS racist to make those sorts of comments to the person you're chatting to though. Hell maybe that's why I'm still single but I know that I sure wouldn't go out with a guy I didn't find sexually attractive. Maybe that will change with age but maybe not. At my age, no sex or bad sex ruins relationships. Trust me, I tried it.

My preference is for shorter, strong guys. I wouldn't mind a taller one, but I prefer short. I also prefer certain races over others, though I would never say so directly. Such is the way my brain works. If someone finds ME ugly for being 5'7" and kinda skinny, then so be it. It's not my fault (well maybe the weight thing IS my fault for not working harder), but it's also none of my concern. They can go find someone else they like better.

 

[NickCole]

1. When they find out I'm black?

2. When they find I'm not built like a football player?

Be upfront about who you are, online and in real life, then you won't have this problem.

You'll know that the people who like you and are interested in talking to you really do like you and really are interested in you.

And by the way, people who are interested or disinsterested in talking to someone because of their physical appearance are shallow and won't have the ability to offer much substance anyway. Why bother with them?

Is it me or is every guy online a 6' tall 200lb jock? Where are my normal guys hiding?

Some people, especially people in their 20s today, lie about who they are. Sadly, that's just the way it is. Online it's very easy to lie about everything except intelligence and literacy. Take the Internet for what it is and don't fool yourself into believing it's the same as meeting and getting to know people in the flesh.

Oh well, in the mean time I'm beginning to have a little fun with it. A guy IM'ed me earlier with a "hi." I simply responded with "hi. I'm black." then he said "ok. sorry. later." hilarious.

That's not funny.

It's really sad and pathetic. And it must have hurt your feelings. I'm sorry so many people today are so unkind. But there are decent honest people out there --even some in their 20s!-- and you will find them if you treat people the way you want to be treated. Don't give up, there are good people out there. Unfortunately you're going to meet and maybe even think you've made a friendship with a few clunkers along the way -- think of it as a chance to know your fellow human beings better.

 

[Just_Believe18]

I think most young guys just don't have an open mind. I'll be honest, when I was 17, I wasn't interested in Black guys and said so. I never considered myself racist but growing up, I was only exposed to White and Hispanic boys. As I got older, I began to appreciate the beauty of Black and Asian men. Now I want them all!

It's hard to explain. I can see how you've been rejected but I wouldn't call them racist. Just... close-minded and missing out. I think they'll come around when they get a little older.

 

[phoenix72]

Some folks just dont know what they are missing. There are so many wonderful guys of all races, ages, body types and everything else. Those people your talking to are about as shallow as an empty tub of water. So dont bother with them and search for other folks believe me they are out there. I know that for a fact. Of all places i actually met my BF on Myspace (i know right) but we hit it off from the start and its been fantastic. It will get better believe me.

 

[unclaimedblessing]

Maybe it would help to equate chat hookup & personals sites to a clothing catalog.
Some "shoppers" are looking for a red shirt and simply don't want a blue one.
Some are looking for S or M or L or XL and won't be satisfied with anything else.
Some want long sleeves and some want short (Freudian?).
There is probably as much or even more fantasy to those sites than there is reality.
Don't be discouraged because you don't fill some strangers fantasy expectations, it isn't always the real world anyway.

 

[cosmicblue]

Some people are so narrowminded its unbelieble what has race got to do with it we are all individuals with the same rights, and so what if yur small, fat, deaf what ever... No one is perfect although we all think that we are, we as gay guys have been fighting for years to be equal with our hetrosexual counterparts BUT we we still judge each other well not me, I am very nonjudgmental and accept people for who they are regardless of race gender sexuality but some people still live in the dark ages.. I am not perfect far from it.. Ok I maybe a white guy whoppee doo.. but i am not built like an adonis oh no not me.... I am a skinny guy and thats who I am and peeps can like it or lump it. Anyone reading this wanna caht PM me Davie XxX

 

[TrdMrk]

The Gay community is all about unification when it comes to getting rights, but go to a gay club here at night and you get sent to the back to lurk with the rest of the darkies in the shadows .

Yes, I'm black.