Why Do We Hate?

[Harke the Boeotarch]

^ Simple self-preservation.

 

[ChickenGuy]

Fear of what is different.

 

[jizzeater]

There is no simple answer to why people hate, Mohr said. Hate can be sparked by greed, or fear, or a tribe bonding together in opposition to another. People looking to belong will hate others to fit into a group, he said.

I have read all negative emotions can be traced back to fear of something, and I think that is true.

People who hate gays may fear an "abnormal" or "perverted" lifestyle may become accepted and considered normal. They may fear open displays of affection by gays and lesbians. They may fear having their children "turned gay". They may fear other "sick" activities will become more prevalent, such as gay orgies in public (never said fear was rational ).

 

[Edward Twinkletoes]

Fear of what is different.

Or, possibly, repressed knowledge of what isn't different.

 

[Royal Heart]

Hate is easy. I think the end of the article is correct in describing how hate works - you separate the object of your hatred from the rest of humanity and then, in your mind, since they're not a human being it's all right to do terrible things to them.

The mechanics of how it works is pretty clear. As for why: Because it's easier than trying to change yourself in a productive way that leads either to understanding or the dissolution of hate. It takes a great deal of mind-training to be able to do that and most people don't know it can be done, don't know how it's done, or don't care to learn or put in the effort.

 

[gsdx]

Fear of what is different.

With only 2 exceptions which are innate (a fear of falling - but not a fear of heights - and a fear of sudden loud noises), all other fears, including a fear of heights, are learnt.

If hatred is a result of 'fear', then people can be retaught not to hate.

They must, however, be willing to be taught.

 

[Harke the Boeotarch]

In time we hate that which we often fear.

Teenage thugs who are 'victims of society' etc.

 

[Shepherd 2]

Fear of what is different.

Exactly, and it is mainly self destructive of the person who hates another not the object of the fear. How ironic. Well said, ChickenGuy.

And gay men are often among the worst abusers of the tendency to fear and hate. It is a tragedy that often compounds the experience of being gay.

Shep+

 

[gsdx]

What I do not understand is why we are not open minded enough to learn about what we fear before hating it.

Probably because the fear and hatred are learnt before the child is old enough to form his or her own opinion.

Think: Like father, like son.

Think: Children of the KKK.

Think: Fred Phelps and his grandchildren.

They really have no choice but to learn hatred.

 

[Harke the Boeotarch]

I agree with the notion that we hate what we fear.

What I do not understand is why we are not open minded enough to learn about what we fear before hating it.

Fear is bred out of what is unknown. If only we'd educate ourselves before spreading hate, we'd be in a better place. But alas that's too much to ask.

You're not taking into account the possibility that hatred comes from understanding rather than from ignorance.

How many times should people pelt you with stones before you get really really sick of it?

I'm not above hating other people and neither are you so let's not try to fool ourselves.

 

[ChickenGuy]

Probably because the fear and hatred are learnt before the child is old enough to form his or her own opinion.
--------
They really have no choice but to learn hatred.

I was thinking exactly the same sort of thing.

It's a controversial topic, but children do need to be exposed to the full range of human racial and sexual diversity.

Those on the right would of course call this indoctrination - as if they themselves were not indoctrinating through keeping the child deliberately ignorant and insulated from the outside world - a far worse outcome in the long run.

It is not, as they would believe, the transforming and manipulating of a child - it's simply making sure that the child is fully aware and comfortable with all the various creeds and colours that the human race comprises.

Children are taught about all the different animals in primary school.

A shame they weren't taught about all the different humans.

 

[Royal Heart]

I disagree that hate has to do with fear. They're not the same emotion. Any human being who has felt both emotions will know better. I would accept that they could be connected in many instances, but I would never equate the two or draw such a short line between them.

 

[Royal Heart]

Also hate, like every "negative" emotion out there is rooted in self-grasping ignorance that apprehends that there is a solid "me" and a solid "you", and that we are fundamentally separate and different from each other.

It's a silly idea at best, but it's how our brains are wired to apprehend reality, unfortunately. Luckily we can think our way out of that rubbish.

 

[jizzeater]

I agree with the notion that we hate what we fear.

What I do not understand is why we are not open minded enough to learn about what we fear before hating it.

Fear is bred out of what is unknown. If only we'd educate ourselves before spreading hate, we'd be in a better place. But alas that's too much to ask.

Most people don't want to acknowledge fear, even to themselves. It's equated with being weak, and we're taught to ignore it or deny it because weakness is so despised. It's hard to learn from something when you refuse to face it.

 

[jizzeater]

Also hate, like every "negative" emotion out there is rooted in self-grasping ignorance that apprehends that there is a solid "me" and a solid "you", and that we are fundamentally separate and different from each other

I would say the illusion of me and you (anything separate from me) is what leads to fear and other negative emotions. IMO, nothing but fear can spring from that. When you perceive yourself as a separate self, vulnerable to attack by outside forces, it's only natural to be afraid.

At the opposite pole, love (unity), peace, joy, happiness, etc. spring from coming together and viewing all as one.

 

[FPNY]

you should define hate, i hate many things but with different intensities. for example, I hate pot roast and I hate the inequities that we are currently living with. hate is a very strong emotion with many layers, what kind of hate are we talkin here?

 

[gsdx]

I disagree that hate has to do with fear. They're not the same emotion.

Yes, they are different emotions, but one grows out of the other. 'Hate' grows out of 'fear' just as 'love' grows out of 'enjoyment'.

Let's say you get bit by a dog when you're a kid and you come to fear dogs. Over the years, with continued encounters with dogs, you learn to hate them. You still fear them, but you hate being anywhere near them and may even become agitated simply by seeing photos of dogs.

Conversely, if enjoy being with dogs when you're a kid, it is quite likely that you will grow up to love them unless something serious happens to you.

It's not uncommon to hear someone who is afraid of heights to stand on a balcony and say, "I hate being up here!" Their fear has expanded to hate and they will do whatever they can to avoid those situations.

The same goes for people. It's very easy to learn to hate people who are different for whatever reason, and it's even more easy to generalise to include the entire group of people from one bad encounter with a single individual. Quite commonly, parental fears and prejudices are easily passed down to children. They learn to fear what the parents fear and hate what the parents hate.

You're right, though. Fear and hatred are different emotions, but they go hand-in-hand.

 

[Royal Heart]

Then I would argue that hatred and frustration (or anger) also go hand-in-hand. As something or someone can anger you enough that it develops into hatred. Fear is not the sole precursor to hate.

 

[pigface]

From an evolutionary point of view, hate is a completely normal and understandable response.
Any group that looks different is (not always correctly) taken to be the result of a genetic offshoot that is threatening, and the destruction of that is beneficial to your own group.
(Natural selection isn't thought out, it's just a consquence of what worked fairly well for 4 billion years).

 

[Royal Heart]

From an evolutionary point of view, hate is a completely normal and understandable response.
Any group that looks different is (not always correctly) taken to be the result of a genetic offshoot that is threatening, and the destruction of that is beneficial to your own group.
(Natural selection isn't thought out, it's just a consquence of what worked fairly well for 4 billion years).

I agree and this is why we can say that hate is natural. We are very fortunate to have rational (and irrational, and trans-rational for that matter) minds that allow us the option to deal with these emotions in different ways, so it's very interesting to observe. How these emotions arise in response to external phenomena, and then how we choose to deal with them.

I'm very grateful to have that choice. Look at the animal kingdom in which the majority of the creatures we share this planet with do not have a choice. They feel something and they react without thought about the consequences because they're unable to think in that way. Sometimes human beings act as though they have no choice and, often, we hear that as an excuse ("I had no choice."). We just need to all remind each other that how you choose to respond to anything will determine its outcome. You have that power. How awesome is that?