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Why, Ex-Boyfriend, WHY???

tcrawford18

tcrawford18

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I feel sick. Last night, online, I was surfing through amateur pornsites like xtube and rockettube, and you know sometimes you click on something, it takes you somewhere else without you wanting it to, but anyway I stumbled upon a recent vid of my ex having sex with another guy, I guess his new boyfriend or whatever. It was short, but at the end he came alot. And made this face to the camera and said "wow" like all out of breath. And the guy had a perfect body, and started talking afterward, but I cut it off at that point.

We broke up awhile ago. In fact, I was the one who broke up with him. But I've always still thought about him, a little, once in a while and stuff, and I don't know, now I just feel so, out of it. Maybe I'm jealous? Or I'm worried that this new guy gives him better sex than I did before? I don't know. I'm so confused, but all I know is I can't stop thinking about this stupid thing and it's driving me crazy.

And, I texted my ex this afternoon, and he asked "who is this?" and after I told him, I got no response, and he continued to ignore me when I sent 2 more messages. I gave up after that, so i guess he doesnt want to have anything to do with me anymore.

Now I'm just depressed. :help:
 
>>>Maybe I'm jealous? Or I'm worried that this new guy gives him better sex than I did before?

Both, probably. But the latter doesn't mean you suck in bed. I don't know if my partner is a better lover necessarily than my previous one, but I do know the sex is better. And I think it's at least partially because I click with him much better. He's a better fit, if you will. Maybe your ex- just clicks better with this guy.

And yeah, you're jealous. He's got a boyfriend, he's having porn-worthy sex, and judging by those words under your avatar, you're single. But try not to get bogged down in it. Wish your ex well, congratulate him in your mind for finding a guy who can make his come like that, and focus your energy on meeting a guy who can do the same for you. :)

Lex
 
I lost interest when I saw no link to this video.
 
I just learned this in Psychology class today. People tend to 'distort' old memories. When we try to reconstruct memories, we tend to 'fill in' parts of the memories based on past experiences and/or expectation. Thus, the memories might change comparing to the original experience. It happens a lot in relationship.

So, what I am trying to say is that you must have break up with him for some reason, and your recent memories have been distorted by your current situation, and expectation; thus it results in jealousy and incompetence.

Therefore, it's not necessary to feel depressed and trying to contact him out of desperation. I hope this psychological explanation helps and doesn't bore you. O_o
 
dude that sucks. you actually found a vid of your ex having sex online? What are the odds....
 
^<worser advice>You need to make a sex tape with the guy your Ex was doing it with and post it online now. LOL </worser advice>
 
Dorkzilla said:
Your mistake was messaging him, your second and third mistake was messaging him again.
Click to expand...

I agree with Dorkzilla here...You should not have messaged him after finding the video. Not knowing the details of your breakup or the actual reasons for it, advice is pretty limited...but one thing is certain, you got your answer the hard way. He very obviously wants nothing to do with you anymore.

My best suggestion is to forget the video (at least try) and to put more time into meeting new people and exploring new romances...I'm sure it won't be easy, I know from personal experiences that are somewhat similar...but you gotta get past it and look ahead..best of luck to you!
 
Hey

It's a shit situation, but I wouldn't take it personally.

The guy is probably mugging for the camera anyway - he's not going to turn his face to the lens and say "wow - that was acceptable; 3 stars out of 5" is he? You see that on live audience shows all the time - the people cheer and whoop for the most minor thing just because they feel they have to even though it's really not all that amazing, not by any leap of the imagination.

I do agree with some of the other advice here, though - not Epic's haha - you called it off for a reason and I'm sure it was, and still is, a good reason. Don't beat yourself up about it.

Hang in there, dude.

-d-
 
Yup - move on - no need to give it anymore thought - you'll only torture yourself and he won't care.
 
Why would you be jealous of someone who post videos of them having sex with another guy online?

Unless he got paid for ameatur porn just be glad you aren't exploited like that with him.
 
Thanks guys for the advice, I pretty much get what most of you are sayin, that it's time to get over it. Well, actually I had gotten over the relationship, until I saw this stupid video, and then it was like an uncontrollable stab of "no way, he can't do this to me!" Even though yes, i know he didnt do it to like intentionally rape my eyes, but I don't know, maybe I'm territorial or something. I know he's not mine anymore, but just because he's out there with new people which I knew would happen, that doesn't mean I want to see any of it.

Oh, and p.s. the fucked up part is that I broke up with him because he became overly insecure after he found out that I liked porn. So i ended up trying to live without it but on those lonely nights without him I couldn't help myself, and then I ended up feeling like I can't be myself, and when he would come over he'd go through all my files to make sure I didn't have anything "dirty" on my computer and of course he'd find something and freak out and we would fight, and I got tired of the fighting. Now he's a porn star. What the fuck.
 
tcrawford18 said:
Thanks guys for the advice, I pretty much get what most of you are sayin, that it's time to get over it. Well, actually I had gotten over the relationship, until I saw this stupid video, and then it was like an uncontrollable stab of "no way, he can't do this to me!" Even though yes, i know he didnt do it to like intentionally rape my eyes, but I don't know, maybe I'm territorial or something. I know he's not mine anymore, but just because he's out there with new people which I knew would happen, that doesn't mean I want to see any of it.

Oh, and p.s. the fucked up part is that I broke up with him because he became overly insecure after he found out that I liked porn. So i ended up trying to live without it but on those lonely nights without him I couldn't help myself, and then I ended up feeling like I can't be myself, and when he would come over he'd go through all my files to make sure I didn't have anything "dirty" on my computer and of course he'd find something and freak out and we would fight, and I got tired of the fighting. Now he's a porn star. What the fuck.
Click to expand...

He's not a porn star, bud. He's a hypocrite who now has sex on the internet. His new sexual activities came back to haunt you, but they may haunt him even more in the future. Be glad you got rid of a controlling, jealous, insecure guy, and be glad you're not plastered all over the internet with someone you ended up not wanting to be with.
 
This situation sucks. But don't be a dick like I would be and forward that link to everyone he knows ;)
 
^Yeah, that's true.

Whatever you do, DON'T post it in here where all 60 thousand of us could see it.

In other news, it's Opposite Day. :D

-d-
 
How do you know that the vid was done after you broke up with him and not from before you met him and that YOU have already gone out with a "porn star" and broke up with him?

Either way, it IS his loss, isn't it? He is not with you...
 
tcrawford18 said:
I feel sick. Last night, online, I was surfing through amateur pornsites like xtube and rockettube, and you know sometimes you click on something, it takes you somewhere else without you wanting it to, but anyway I stumbled upon a recent vid of my ex having sex with another guy, I guess his new boyfriend or whatever. It was short, but at the end he came alot. And made this face to the camera and said "wow" like all out of breath. And the guy had a perfect body, and started talking afterward, but I cut it off at that point.

We broke up awhile ago. In fact, I was the one who broke up with him. But I've always still thought about him, a little, once in a while and stuff, and I don't know, now I just feel so, out of it. Maybe I'm jealous? Or I'm worried that this new guy gives him better sex than I did before? I don't know. I'm so confused, but all I know is I can't stop thinking about this stupid thing and it's driving me crazy.

And, I texted my ex this afternoon, and he asked "who is this?" and after I told him, I got no response, and he continued to ignore me when I sent 2 more messages. I gave up after that, so i guess he doesnt want to have anything to do with me anymore.

Now I'm just depressed. :help:
Click to expand...


How do I put this politely? You broke up with him. He moved on and found someone new who apparently makes him happy. You need to move on as well. Why did you even try to contact him? What was your reason? To ask him to come back to you?

Stop the damn drama queening and grow the fuck up. Then you might be able to find somebody who will make you happy. I don't see what is so confusing about all of this. It's like that old saying, "You've made your bed, now lie in it."
 
dang mate..
i'd say to kick him where it hurts.. but that wont help...i agree with some guys on here, and ya should go with it... move on mate.. (we have similar stories.. but anyway) im sure your a tough guy, and ya can handle.. ;) "Life goes On"

best of luck to ya mate
 
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