Why would a straight guy do something like this?

[halunke]

Hey guys! I'm a new person on this site. I'm a student, this is my first year in college and right now I'm living in dormitory room together with a roommate. I've never lived with anyone before and I thought it would be hard for me but he's quite nice guy and I could say we're friends but there's something weird about him, especially lately. Ever since I told him I'm gay, he has started being sexual in my presence and showing his body. It might sound funny and actually it is funny for me but I've started to think why would he do that, as he claimed he's double straight. He asked me if I found him attractive and I said no. Actually that's a lie, I do find him attractive, he's gorgeous, wonderful voice, beautiful, trained body. I said I didn't like him because we've to live together and I didn't want to make the situation awkward between us, so I decided it's better if he doesn't know my real attitude towards him.

For example, if we're watching TV together, he comes and sits next to me and starts rubbing his crotch through his boxers and there's not even anything on the TV that would be connected with sex, usually news or some sports or something. I act as if I don't see anything but sometimes I think I start to laugh hard.

If we happen to be in the bathroom together ( and somehow it happens often during the last days), like I'm shaving or something and he comes in and openly changes his underwear in front of me.

He has started to sleep naked and he doesn't even cover himself with a blanket. Sometimes he also masturbates while lying there.

Once I was doing my homework in the evening, he came out of the shower and asked me how it's going and when I turned to answer him, he was behind my back, completely naked.

When I asked him what is going on, he said that I'm exaggerating things and told me not to check him out. I understand that everything's natural and guys shouldn't be ashamed of guys however it seems suspicious to me that this started only when I told him I'm into guys. Before I told him I'm gay he never did anything like that. Why start now?

I'm a very shy guy and I'd never come on to anyone, even if I knew they're gay. Is he trying to lead me on or something? But why would he if he's as straight as he claims?

 

[pankola6]

I'd have found it difficult not to have drained his balls by now but kudos to you for resisting

 

[Seasoned]

Straight or not, the boy seems curious, but you're going to have to judge what life might be like if he starts talking shit in the dorm. Your personality, I think, would present problems for you if he felt guilty and blamed you or made up a story about you. Any guy friends there with whom you've confided?

 

[halunke]

Straight or not, the boy seems curious, but you're going to have to judge what life might be like if he starts talking shit in the dorm. Your personality, I think, would present problems for you if he felt guilty and blamed you or made up a story about you. Any guy friends there with whom you've confided?

Why would he talk shit about me? Aside from this, we've normal relationships and I haven't done anything bad to him.

Even if he did, other people's thoughts don't bother me much.

 

[heir-to-the-wind]

He may be looking for blowjobs from you without reciprocating because he is ''straight.'' Why did you feel compelled to tell him you are gay? If it is really a problem, confront him and ask him what he wants rather than guess. He may want to humiliate you buy telling others if you blow him.

 

[halunke]

I didn't just tell him that out of the blue. For some reason he asked me if I was gay and I told him I was, because I'm not in the closet. I don't announce my sexuality as the first thing about me but if someone asks me, I don't hide it.

 

[Cormac135]

He obviously wants a blowjob from you and perhaps a willing arse he can fuck whenever he likes.

I'd have been all over him by now.

Get on with it.

 

[heir-to-the-wind]

I didn't just tell him that out of the blue. For some reason he asked me if I was gay and I told him I was, because I'm not in the closet. I don't announce my sexuality as the first thing about me but if someone asks me, I don't hide it.

Since he asked you, and claims to be straight, he is probably in the closet. Proceed with caution. Sex could cause him to feel guilty and then accuse you of something.

 

[eastofeden]

He could be a simple prick tease...

...or he could want sex from you. If he wanted sex from you....would you be OK with it?

What I would do...sleep naked with no covers yourself...just because it feels good to sleep naked. See what happens....

 

[swerve]

Guys like their egos stroked.

Not unusual for an absolutely straight guy to want approval from a gay guy.

Go with the flow and enjoy your friendship.

Good luck in school!

 

[pandh200]

I'm in a similar situation but i've never confessed to being gay or bi

 

[halunke]

If he wanted sex from you....would you be OK with it?

No, I wouldn't be ok with it. I'm a virgin and I don't see myself sharing my body with anyone anytime soon.

 

[heir-to-the-wind]

No, I wouldn't be ok with it. I'm a virgin and I don't see myself sharing my body with anyone anytime soon.

If sex is out of the question, and if his actions annoy you, then request a new roommate. There's no need to make a soap opera out of the situation. It's a no-brainer.

 

[gayjohnd]

No, I wouldn't be ok with it. I'm a virgin and I don't see myself sharing my body with anyone anytime soon.

It's ok to not want sex yet but you find him attractive so would you want to date him if he's gay?

He could have a denial problem. I had a denial issue for years before I finally accepted I'm gay.
It can sound really weird to others but part of me was saying "he has a nice bum" while another part of me was saying "but I'm not gay"

 

[halunke]

It's ok to not want sex yet but you find him attractive so would you want to date him if he's gay?

He could have a denial problem. I had a denial issue for years before I finally accepted I'm gay.
It can sound really weird to others but part of me was saying "he has a nice bum" while another part of me was saying "but I'm not gay"

I'm not sure, it's hard to answer. I've always been more or less a loner. Yes, he's attractive but looks are not the primary thing when it comes to dating.

 

[gayjohnd]

I'm not sure, it's hard to answer. I've always been more or less a loner. Yes, he's attractive but looks are not the primary thing when it comes to dating.

You need to find that answer but be careful you don't end up chasing someone you can never have.

Do you like him and enjoy spending time with him?

What do you think when you see him jerk off and does he know you've seen him?

 

[jayallday]

I have been on many all-male sports teams and all of the guys I basically grew up with are straight, so trust me when I say this: that's just what straight guys do And only us - the gay guys - will notice that they put a hand in their pants and start playing with their balls Thats just how most of them are. Same with showing off their dicks If a guy has something to show, you will probably see it at some point It's just showing that they feel comfortable. Hell, I'm gay, but act the same way around them, cuz that just how it always was and probably will be.

After my coming out to my best friend his first reaction was: "Man, it's cool but I will still be showing you my dick and act like we always have, I'm not gonna change that!" Best reaction I could have asked for I guess. I'm out to all of my friends for a couple years and they still act the same way

I'm not atracted to any of my friends though, so it never was a problem for me. Most of us have been into sports our whole lifes, so have really nice bodies and everything, but still are just not my type as I prefer older men. Some of the coaches we had were fire though

If, and thats a BIG if IMO, he makes a move then you can think what to do about it, but for now I would just enjoy the views and not think about it much. Think about it this way: it may actually help you - you will get used to see guys naked and when you have a boyfriend you will feel more comfortable taking your own clothes off from the get go

 

[KaraBulut]

I have been on many all-male sports teams and all of the guys I basically grew up with are straight, so trust me when I say this: that's just what straight guys do And only us - the gay guys - will notice that they put a hand in their pants and start playing with their balls

It's true that guys who are into sports or grew up in a house with mostly men are more likely to to be relaxed in front of each other. However, being naked with a relative stranger, a girl or a gay man is another matter.

Ever since I told him I'm gay, he has started being sexual in my presence and showing his body. It might sound funny and actually it is funny for me but I've started to think why would he do that, as he claimed he's double straight.

Straight guys are also very territorial. It almost seems like this guy is going out of his way to make you uncomfortable and to mark his territory... as in, "this is my room and I'm going to be naked in it". College roommates play these types of games all the time with doing things that annoy the other person, having overnight guests or just being completely inappropriate.

The question is how uncomfortable you are about the situation. Is it just something that is an annoyance or does it really bother you to the point you want him to change?

Just to make sure- you've told him clearly that the behavior isn't something that you want him to do? And he continues to do it?

 

[halunke]

Do you like him and enjoy spending time with him?

What do you think when you see him jerk off and does he know you've seen him?

Yeah, aside from this thing, he's a really nice person, I enjoy spending time with him. He knows I've seen him jerking off but I don't think much when I see him doing it, I just turn my back at him and fall asleep eventually.

It's not that he bothers me to the point when I cannot stand him but it just feels weird when he does that. I've just been wondering why he's doing that. Yesterday he asked me if I was dating anyone and if I've even been together with a girl.

 

[gayjohnd]

I have been on many all-male sports teams and all of the guys I basically grew up with are straight, so trust me when I say this: that's just what straight guys do And only us - the gay guys - will notice that they put a hand in their pants and start playing with their balls Thats just how most of them are. Same with showing off their dicks If a guy has something to show, you will probably see it at some point It's just showing that they feel comfortable. Hell, I'm gay, but act the same way around them, cuz that just how it always was and probably will be.

but they don't jerk off when another bloke is in the room unless they're drunk and have put on porn.

Yeah, aside from this thing, he's a really nice person, I enjoy spending time with him. He knows I've seen him jerking off but I don't think much when I see him doing it, I just turn my back at him and fall asleep eventually.

It's not that he bothers me to the point when I cannot stand him but it just feels weird when he does that. I've just been wondering why he's doing that. Yesterday he asked me if I was dating anyone and if I've even been together with a girl.

He could be asking for details because he's curious or closet but scrared to come out.
It could also explain what he does. He could be doing these things because he wants something to happen but is scared.

A lot of the advice you need depends on what you want to happen.

If you're not bothered by it and don't want anything to happen then just let him do his thing.

If you do want something to happen then you need a way to let things happen.
Do you be naked in front of him?
Have you ever jerked off when he's in the room? It would be hard for him to complain when he's done it.

I know you don't want sex yet but would you be up for other things with him? Things like jerking off together or a blow job?
If you don't want to do those just yet but want to date him then you have to be really careful with asking a scared closet out. It could scare him more and put him deeper in the closet.