Women You'd Turn Straight For

[Esquire0399]

I love my fat chicks.

Kelly is not fat!

 

[JonHCA]

Kelly is not fat!

I'm sorry, but the badonkadonk doesn't lie!

 

[todwod]

I loved her in Unfaithful...such a hot coug

 

[JonHCA]

>_> Really?

It's not like she isn't still gorgeous. But she has some extra baggage.

 

[pausanias_usa]

Growing up (I'll show my age here) I was confused sexually by Diana Rigg in a jumpsuit and Grace Slick's eyes.

But I'd always turn back to Flipper for some reason. . . .

 

[Ninja108]

None,nada,zip,zero. I'm not attracted to women sexually at all.

 

[WellingLuv]

Erica Durance from Smallville

 

[JasunStrikesBack]

How about you not post in the thread, jackass? Is it so fucking hard to just ignore a thread?

Oh cry me a fucking river. This is apparently a "fun" thread so my first post was a silly flippant joke about Tom Cruise. I DID stand up for people who get tired of getting asked if maybe they haven't found the right girl and everyone piles on me. It's ok.. I'm a big boy.. I can take it... isn't the first time I've ruffled the feathers of a few old ladies.

How about you have a nice bran muffin?

Why are you always so bitchy and annoying? I don't like you. I think you just STFU alright.

OH yeah? well,

 

[JasunStrikesBack]

What? I'd do Tom Cruise.

You'd do him in a "I'd fuck him" way or you'd do him in a "mafia hit man" kind of way?

 

[bankside]

Björk.

And I mean, I don't just appreciate her from a gay distance.

I'd go 100% totally straight for her. Bury my nose in her sweet Icelandic volcanic vent of love because "I am the clit commander! I love the clit." Oh yeah.


Nahhh, I'm kidding. I'd appreciate her from a gay distance. If we ever got naked together, she'd have to have a hell of a sense of humour. I know I would.

 

[Callum]

Yvonne Strahovsky
Kate Beckinsale
Kate Winslet
Beyonce
Katy Perry
Scarlett Johanson
Sara Ramirez
Gwyneth Paltrow
Kiera Knightly
Natalie Portman
Katherine Heigl
Zoe Saldana
Mariska Hargitay
Carrie Underwood


I got a little carried away here..

You, sir, have excellent taste in women. Now, guys you are gay for? I have a cousin in Asheville...

 

[bankside]

*Gets down [STRIKE]on knees[/STRIKE]*

*puts hands [STRIKE]together[/STRIKE] on knees and raises them to the sky*

"Please let it be ME!!

fixed that for you lol.

 

[Esquire0399]

I DID stand up for people who get tired of getting asked if maybe they haven't found the right girl and everyone piles on me.

I really, REALLY, don't think anyone here came into this thread with that mentality other than you. This is a JOKE THREAD man, meant to be taken as a JOKE Jasun. You're making yourself look a little silly getting so passionately upset. Just breathe and move on from this thread if it's really ruining your day like this. And go ahead and insult me for whatever reason, it won't bother me because I don't look at every situation as a crisis, especially not a thread to which my response is Betty White.

 

[Esquire0399]

And Betty White ain't old. Yeah, sure.

I don't get it, she's not old.

 

[Callum]

His opening post claims straight guys discuss who they'd go gay for. Um. Nope. Not a chance.

What? They do...all the time...I work with several heterosexual men that have discussed willingly 'going gay' for Ryan Reynolds and Hugh Jackman. It was actually a topic of discussion back when that Wolverine movie came out. It will, probably, be another topic of discussion when their next movies come out. Many of the heterosexual men enjoy baiting one another with gay jokes. Inappropriate? Of course, but the 'go gay for' question pops up all the time.

The thread is tongue-in-cheek. No one is 'turning straight' for anyone. No one in any form implied they were literally 'turning straight' for anyone. No homosexual male is sticking their penis in any of the women listed within this thread. We are, for the most part, differentiating between attractive and unattractive women and with irony noting which we would 'turn straight for'.

Lighten the fuck up. I can't believe people have to have the premise of joke threads explained to them.

 

[JasunStrikesBack]

I really, REALLY, don't think anyone here came into this thread with that mentality other than you.

What are you talking about? My first post was funny... a joke.

This is a JOKE THREAD man, meant to be taken as a JOKE Jasun.

no shit. Did you even see my first post?

It wasn't until the uptight ladies started scolding those of us who didn't just start naming off pop singers, super models and actresses that this thread went off the rails.

don't hang your shit on me.

 

[Mstrshake]

I doubt my sexuality on occasion. But then I remember what a vagina looks like.

Maybe Keira Knightley.

What? I'd do Tom Cruise.

Not me. I wouldn't want to catch his scientologitis.

 

[JasunStrikesBack]

Just breathe and move on from this thread if it's really ruining your day like this.

Have you even read the things I've posted in this thread? 90% of them are jokes. I mean... you don't actually think that I'm saying Tom Cruise could turn me into a straight guy, right?

right?

especially not a thread to which my response is Betty White.

So... you're allowed to joke in this thread but when I do, I'm taking it too seriously?

Can you like... read and shit?

 

[Esquire0399]

Honestly as soon as I saw the thread title I rolled my eyes and thought "another gay dude trying too hard to make himself look straighter than the rest."

His opening post claims straight guys discuss who they'd go gay for. Um. Nope. Not a chance.

So Jasun is not the only one who saw the thread as another punch in the face.

You're gay. It's OK. You don't even have to have a "go to" woman for any reason what-so-ever.

Let me tell you something. Almost ALL of my close friends in my real life are straight guys (not necessarily by choice). I know countless other straight guys that I'd consider worth hanging with. I've been surrounded by straight guys my entire life. I graduated from a college with over 20,000 students, of which about 43% were male, most of them being straight. Straight guys talk about who they'd go gay for frequently. This is speaking from direct observation in various straight male demographics. What the hell are you talking about? Go away.

 

[Esquire0399]

What are you talking about? My first post was funny... a joke.




no shit. Did you even see my first post?

It wasn't until the uptight ladies started scolding those of us who didn't just start naming off pop singers, super models and actresses that this thread went off the rails.

don't hang your shit on me.

Yup, I read your first post. Then I read your others. Stop putting all your stock in your first post, it's not the only one you made.