Working With Will

[G-Lexington]

Honestly, I'd call him out on it. Next time he starts with the "sexy" and "baby" talk, ask him pointblank. "Look, seriously, are you hitting on me? I mean, it's cool if you are - I just don't want to misread anything here."

Lex

 

[Telstra]

go with the flow. Do what ever you feels like doing.
Even tho he is "str8" if both of you would like adult actions, why not try and have fun.

 

[martin6]

In my experience, straight guys DO do that. Kinda sucks, doesn't it?

If they say they're straight I don't give them a second thought in the "I want you" department. No matter how hot they are. It's too much drama.

 

[kramer362]

I wouldn't point blank ask him for it could make him uncomfortable and make him feel he has to watch what he does around you so you don't misread his actions. Maybe jokingly say "you know thats the stuff closet homos do... you SURE you're ONLY into girls?" then laugh it off. That way it doesn't put him on the spot and keeps it lighthearted, but it might make him think.

Then again that might not do a damned thing =\

 

[tonyboy]

I started working in the produce section of a grocery store back in June. I quickly made several friends. One of them is a guy named Will. He's only 20 (21 on Nov 2). He's really cool and we get along really well. Actually, so well that we've become really good friends and have hung out a few times outside of work. For the last couple months, it was nothing but friendship. He maintains that he's straight and talks about girls and pussy/boobs and all the sex he's had. So, even though I thought he was cute, I didn't really think much about him in that way. Until a few weeks ago, that is.

He knows I'm gay. I was up front about that from the beginning, so he wouldn't find out some other way and freak out. He would constantly point out girls he thought was cute, so I finally had to tell him it was sorta lost on me. He was totally cool with it. My friends said that since he was so cool with it, he must be curious or maybe gay, too. Which I thought was stupid.

Then, a few weeks ago, he started this joke flirting thing. It started with little things like "hey there sexy" and calling me "baby." Then it sorta escalated. For instance, last week I messed something up and said "well, fuck me" and he said "ok, bend over." Then a few days ago we were in the produce cooler, unloading the morning truck and I bent over a stack of crates to grab something behind them and he grabbed my hips and started humping me. I've kept it cool and not reciprocated, but this time I told him to not start anything he's not willing to finish. He laughed and said he'd finish later.

So, is this normal for straight guys? I mean, that sounds stupid to ask. But I worked at a Pizza Hut a few years ago and one of the cooks, who was very masculine, really cute, and I had a big crush on, would grab my ass and spank me with the pizza peel (the board with the handle that they slide under the pizza pan when it's hot) but he ended up getting married and has a kid now. Is it because they know I'm gay and are making fun of me or something? Should I be offended or turned on? I don't know and I have no idea if this is going somewhere or if I should just brush it off.

Well first let me say congratualtions for being upfront about your sexuality.... not an easy thing to do for many guys. From reading your blogs and posts over the past while I know you are a pretty shy guy, so I don't think it was easy for you to be that open.
And yeah, sometimes straight guys are assholes when it comes to messing with gay guys as is that jerk of a guy you happen to work with.
You are strong and muscular and could easily just punch him out.... but I know you are not that sort of guy. I figure you are pretty passive when it comes to stuff like that, not cause you cannot stand up for youserlf but because you just want to do you job and get along with people. I give you a lot of credit for the way you handle yourself man.

You are a shy guy and seems pretty accepting of the way people deal with you.
You are also one of the most handsome guys ever to appear on jub.
Best you don't get a crush on guys that are handsome/cute and are not gay... I know sometimes it's tough to tell.... but seems that you'd be best to find a guy or guys that you know are gay.
There are at the very least 2 million gay guys in this country that would love to get to know you.... could be even date you.

Next time Will tries that shit with you call him on it. I'd bet that he would soon lay off. You are a very good guy my friend.... no need to take that stuff from guys that are either wishing they could be with you but don't have the balls to ask you out, or are making fun of you in thier own perverted and stupid way.

You are handsome, beautiful, kind, and good. No need to take shit from idiots.
Sorry for this long answer to your question my friend. I'd have written it as a pm if I had the ability to do so. Seems my pm ability has been restricted for a couple of days.

Usually I write to you via pm.... sorry that I couldn't do so tonight.
your friend,
tonyboy

 

[KaraBulut]

Some straight guys do these kinds of things. They act this way with way with their straight friends. They act this way with their gay friends.

Yes, it's very homoerotic. Yes, it probably could be called flirting.

The problem is that these guys are fine as long as they are the ones in control of the situation. If the tables were turned and you were the one dry humping his ass, he'd probably freak out and think that you were making a pass at him.

The crucial piece of information is that you both are at work. This kind of behavior is never appropriate in the workplace- even if it is just horsing around.

The other thing you might want to keep in mind is that grocery stores have very extensive security systems. Look up at the ceiling in the store- there's concealed cameras everywhere. So, there's probably a tape of this guy dry humping your ass.

 

[bluepheonix]

Next time he does it: "Make a move or stop fucking with my head".

 

[12fear99]

I would take him up on it. He will do it or back track. But this way you will know. Good Luck.

 

[najfus]

I think his actions are common among straight men that I hang out with and I've been in many similar situations. I've always just chalked it up to the straight guy being comfortable with his/your sexuality and it being nothing more than a joke.

I wouldn't confront him unless it goes further and/or it's making you uncomfortable.

 

[Coffee]

I think he's straight, and he's just joking for fun. Like straight guy picking chicks.
The "humping" thing he did may just he was horny then, wanna have something to think about having sex. He may have sex with his girl at that night. Or he was so tired and wanna have some fun.
I have a friend who is totally straight and he has a girl friend for 3 years now, who he has had a crush for 5 years. But when we were in highschool, we usually spanked each other's ass. He thinks my ass is hot and I think his is, too. Anyway, be careful with your emotional thinking, don't fall for anything that "seems to be flirting" . Because the way you tell us about him, I think he's a kind of guy like flirting joke.

 

[Ares]

I wouldn't look too far into it. I flirt with girls all the time, though I have no interest taking it any further. Sometimes it's a defense mechanism when I'm uncomfortable and sometimes it's just done for jokes.

 

[backpacker]

He fits one of two categories: 1) He's straight, comfortable with his sexuality and isn't afraid of being called gay; 2) he's curious. Trying to figure out which he is will drive you crazy. The best thing to do is ask him. Say something like "You know I'm gay. I don't know if all your jokes are just your way of showing me you are OK with me being gay and you're just joking around or if you are hitting on me. I'm cool with either one. I just don't want to misinterpret anything."

To answer your question, straight guys joke around like that all the time.

 

[billybob109]

Alot of young people who openly know gay people like to mess with them because it so easy. We do it at work all the time too these two gay guys and they love it its really funny.. and they would also say stuff like "dont start what you wont finish" If he is so open i would ask him more questions like would he ever mess around with a guy or has he because to me whatever you say he wont get offended.
P.S. im never eating at pizzs hut again since ur ass was on my pizza! lol

 

[allthelittlefishies]

I don't think he's doing this to mess with you. Straight people don't tend to understand that "gay play" could be awkward for gay people because it could misinterpreted.

It's completely understandable that you wouldn't like it, but as you said, this guy seems nice. Just tell him to stop and remain friends.

 

[Sportsguy313]

Yeah, I don't think he's intentionally trying to mess with you. It seems like he likes you (not necessarily in a gay way) and If you just ask what his intentions are, and explain your getting mixed signals it should be alright. If he stops he's straight, if not he may be curious...idk

 

[nautiboyjeff]

Flirt with him, have fun, you are young, enjoy this. You keep going to the end game with everything, enjoy the ride my friend. That's what it's all about. You should tease him a little. Don't go from zero to 60 in 5.1 seconds.

He is obviously trusting you, you should relax and not make hard and fast decisions.

If he flirts, flirt back. He might have bad days, just like you, but he seems like he is enjoying it, you should too!

Str8, bi or gay, he sounds like a damn nice guy. If he's a nice guy, you have sex and he finds out he's str8, he will still be your friend. If he's a nice guy, he's gay then you might have your next boyfriend.

 

[Kyanimal]

Hey, James!

Into one of your new "adventures", I see!

For Heaven's Sake ... stop THINKING!!!

Will is a young, horny, sexy, Dude! At his age, they ALL are! It's really fantastic that he's comfortable enough, with You, to feel that he can "play around"! THAT is a "Good Thing"!

But ... what are His "Limits"?? Only HE knows the answer to that! And, that even may not be apparent to Him, until He is presented with more "Possibilities"!

So ... how will You find out where He might "draw the Line"?? Relax! Do what You FEEL! Don't THINK about it! Just make Yourself "Casually" Available to Him! And ... should You reach the point that He "Bulks" ... You can easily "Back Off", and still keep Him as a Friend!

If You like it/don't mind so much ... let Him "Play" as much as He wants! Enjoy HIM as fully as You can! Gently PUSH the "Limits", right back! But ... also be prepared to respect His comfort barrier should things reach that point! He may THINK He knows what He's doing, when He really has no clue!

HUGS are Good! Shoulder massages are Good! Any physical contact is Good! Definitely do whatever You can to "Encourage" Him! Let Him know that whatever He MIGHT want is O.K. with You! Let HIM make the calls, one step at a time!

Will it, eventually, lead to "Something"? Who knows?? But, in the mean time, it can certainly be lots of Fun!! (I'm out of Smilies, damn it!)

Of course ... as always ... no matter what ...

Keep smilin'!! (Hugs, Kisses)
Chaz ;-)

 

[62624rd]

I would brush it off. The guys that i work with do this (hump one another) all the time. I guess that's it is a part of male bonding.

 

[Kyanimal]

Then, later we were at the urinals in the bathroom and he said "hey" and I looked over and he had his dick out and showed it to me! I'll admit, it was a very very nice dick. But I acted like it was no big deal and just shrugged it off. But he could see mine was semi hard and said "I knew you'd like it"! I just told him to shut up and that's all that was said about it. I'm really considering telling him I have a crush on him and just seeing what he does. Or what should I do? Is this going too far?

Ha! Another Reply so I can get more Smilies!!

THAT scene is just so "HAWT"! So you two have shown off your dicks, and He hasn't "Backed Off", yet! Going too far?? Only HE has the answer to that! Don't YOU be the one who "Backs Off"!

Be careful about playing the "CRUSH Card", though! Those self-defined "Str8" Guys seem to be like, "You can Suck Me, maybe even Fuck Me, but don't You DARE try to Kiss Me!"

They may even Suck and Fuck back! But ... bring up the Emotional side of things, and they suddenly get really "Squirrelly"!

Good Luck with Will!!

Keep smilin'!!
Chaz

 

[Kyanimal]

Ok, well, I promise I'll try my hardest not to over think it. I tend to do that with alot of things haha. So I don't care where this goes--friendship or sex, I'll be happy with whatever I get out of this.

DAMN! I wish I was 30 yr. younger!!

Keep smilin'!!
Chaz