Would you consider a woman homophobic if she refuses to date bisexual men?

[JasunStrikesBack]

I don't think there's any more of a fidelity issue with bisexual men than straight men. But I do think that bisexuality does add a level of "I can't give him what he wants."

I tell gay men to never date bi men unless they just want sex. Bi men will very often end up deciding they want a "normal" life with things like "civil rights" and "legal protection of marriage" and "acceptance of friends and family."

Those things can be pretty enticing for guys on the fence.

NOW... if she's comfortable sharing men with him or is willing to let him explore on his own.. more power to her. But it's baggage that bi men can come with.

 

[JasunStrikesBack]

I think most straight girls go into a relationship with a stronger emphasis on fidelity than gay men do.

Or straight men, apparently. And Bi men, too.

So I guess men.

Gay men will very often have long term relationships where monogamy isn't part of the mix. It's much more common for gay couples to not have strict rules about that and in fact it's more common for them to be open about that.

 

[bigblock]

A woman probably has just as much chance of finding a unicorn, the loch ness monster, or the jersey devil for a dinner date.

 

[2243]

Obviously the woman wouldn't be homophobic by default just because she doesn't want to date a person who is bi. Now, if she said, "I can't be with you because I'm terrified at the disgusting thought of you being intimate with another man!", then she would be. While she still has every right to not date who ever, she is still also homophobic.

 

[pohbear]

No, but I'd call her smart.

i agree with jasun and the others on this one.

 

[kayman23]

Nope, but I would consider her insecure, but if she has bisexual herself then I would consider her an insecure hypocrite.

 

[yeeeaaahhh]

No, not really. Because I understand the feeling.
I would not want to date a bi guy, because I would feel bad knowing that there was something that I could never give him... a vagina.
Maybe this girl feels the same way about him wanting dick?

 

[blackbeltninja]

You guys all think we'll settle for a girl in the end while you suspect she thinks we'd rather be with a guy.

You can't both be right. I hope.

-d-

 

[JasunStrikesBack]

You guys all think we'll settle for a girl in the end while you suspect she thinks we'd rather be with a guy.

You can't both be right. I hope.

-d-

Sadly, experience has taught us we're BOTH right.

 

[Jersey Domino]

Honestly, I think that's really the reason why a lot women wouldn't date a bi guy. The thought of her BF liking dick as much as she does would probably freak many women out.

Why the hell would that even be a problem?

 

[JasunStrikesBack]

So really, I don't think straight women have it any easier with them.

Didn't say they did. Nor do I think they do.

So really... I guess the only people who should date bi men are bi men?

 

[BiMike]

The general pattern seems to be that in youth, bisexual men have flings with gay men, but then after a spell, meet a girl, want to settle down and have children, and leave the gay guys they've dated out in the cold. Years pass, and the bisexual man realizes he wants some cock, and then goes on the downlow.

Of course there are exceptions to this rule.

I think that applies in quite a lot of cases and arises, in my opinion, from the fact that a lot of Bi guys altho turned on by gay sex do not want a true relationship with another guy. They are therefore looking for a girl to fulfil their desire for a long term relationship.
This makes most Bi guys a bad bet for women! However not many Bi guys are prepared to declare their interest in guys to their future wife!

 

[TickTockMan]

^ Thank you, BiMike, for admitting it; for the most part, bi guys on this site will not.

Yes, because when BiMike speaks, he knows for all.

All you did was agree with his opinion, which is what he said it was, but you are taking it as truth and fact. You're showing your bias.

 

[MMMonsterBoy]

No, I wouldn't consider her homophobic. Maybe she just doesn't like the idea that her boyfriend likes dick. It is a little close minded, but it is her standard. As other have pointed out, the issues of insecurity become even stronger.

I have to agree with BiMike. I've encountered many bi guys that say 'I want a normal life, I want a wife and kids' while mostly viewing a long term relationship with men as undesireable. Some of these bi guys are just hiding from the ultimate truth, and that does make it harder for women (the possibility that their man is actually an in-denial gay).

 

[fabulouslyghetto]

Would you consider a woman homophobic if she refuses to date bisexual men?

No, I'd consider her wise.

I'd consider calling her moronic. Assuming her logic is that a bisexual will cheat on her with a guy, she's just as likely to be cheated on by a straight guy with a female mistress.

 

[NineOfClubs]

I wouldn't think she was homophobic, I'd think she was just being practical.

 

[infrasound]

I guess I'm just fucked and should jump into a ditch to save a woman or man from ever being with me

Don't be discouraged. If I weren't partnered already, I'd date you! Bi men make better lovers, if you ask me.

To all bisexual men: Ignore the negativity of the gays on this site, and don't believe all gay men are that closed-minded. I'm living proof that a gay man and a bisexual man can have a healthy, happy, enduring relationship. Early on, everyone said he would leave me for a woman, that the lure of a "normal" life was just too tempting. It has not been the case. I think gay men who think this way are insecure about what they can offer.

Be very upfront about your sexuality from the beginning, and you'll be fine. Find a woman or man who's really secure in who she/he is and who has high self-esteem. Bisexual relationships can bring up insecurities in partners - just take a look at all the insecurity in these bisexual threads! - and these have to be confronted and figured out. That takes a strong person. Just my two cents. Best wishes to you all. Peace out.

 

[BeMused]

OMG seriously? AGAIN??

I want PROOF, NOW that Bisexuals are MORE LIKELY to cheat than any other orientation.

Put up or shut up.

I'd consider calling her moronic. Assuming her logic is that a bisexual will cheat on her with a guy, she's just as likely to be cheated on by a straight guy with a female mistress.

THANK YOU Karen. I'm sick of this shit. People assuming that because bisexuals have the POTENTIAL to cheat with either sex, they're MORE LIKELY to do so than a plain old str8/gay. It's stupid beyond all belief.

ALSO, I'm flabbergasted to see the SAME PEOPLE who say gay guys are unwise to date bisexuals because they'll leave for a woman coming in here and saying that WOMEN are also unwise to do so...

I guess we just aren't supposed to be happy and settle down. You folks are certainly doing your part to discourage us or make it more difficult for us.

 

[BeMused]

Didn't say they did. Nor do I think they do.

So really... I guess the only people who should date bi men are bi men?

By your logic that would be stupid for bi men to do, because they'll sleep around with women

In your world, bi men are alone. Forever. Anyone who considers them as an option is a fool.

 

[BeMused]

Oh...all the sob stories on here about "...my friend's boyfriend wanted to lead a 'normal life' so bisexuals are terrible, ungodly promiscuous creatures of the deep" aren't enough proof for you?

I find all of this pretty comical and saddening, to be honest.

Hah seriously right?

They're no more proof than MOUNTAINS of stories about gays cheating on gays and straights cheating on straights. It's proof that people CHEAT. Not proof that bisexuals are particularly egregious cheaters. Why is there a double standard?

Why is it safe for gays to date gays who could cheat, or straights to date straights who could cheat, but it's not safe for either to date a bisexual who could cheat?