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  • Thread starter Thread starter peeonme
  • Start date Start date
Right you little cunt! I'm arresting you for contempt!

A night in the cells might help to make you think more clearly........and don't be surprised if i pay you a visit at midnight to see the New Year in in style!😈😈😈
 

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"The New Year can be a really depressing time for many but please step away from the railway line young man!

It would be a sin to deprive the world of access to those beautiful buns!"
 

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-Tough time mate! My mortgage payments went up so i have let the boss shag me in the back of the van after every shift to make up the shortfall!

The thing is that I've cum to enjoy it but he's gone away for New Year and my wife's taken the kids to see her mum up north!

-No worries mate! I'll be round to make sure that as Big Ben strikes midnight MY Big Ben will be taking you into 2026 with a bang!😈😈😈
 

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My New Year's resolution is to give up chocolate but it's still only 31 December so get in that garden shed and let me have my last taste of dark chocolate before the clock strikes midnight!
 

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-I'm afraid we have to disconnect the gas supply tomorrow between 8am and 6pm as we are laying new pipes!

-Do you lay anything else!?

-Well if you let me know which number you live at and leave your back door open at 1130 tonight i can make sure that there's a full and uninterrupted supply of something other than gas!😈😈😈
 

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-Have a heart mate! It's Christmas! Good will to men and all that!

-Look lad you're travelling without a ticket which is an offence! I'm just doing my job!

-Well i haven't got any money but if you've got a condom i'll let you take me up the arse!

-Sorry mate! No condom! Get in the toilet right now! I'll do you bareback for the price of a day return to London and keep your shit stained knickers and dirty socks for the penalty fare!😈😈😈!

Happy New Year!
 

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If you're thinking of giving up smoking in the New Year we're here to help!

We don't believe that vaping is a valid substitute but we do advocate sucking on a nice cock!

All that meat is a great source of protein and if you do it properly you'll end up with a nice dollop of cream to boost your calcium intake!😈😈😈
 

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While Elizabeth I is credited with the famous quotation:

"I have no desire to make windows into men's souls!"

her successor James I was more interested in making windows into men's holes!
 

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