Attracted to straight men (majority)

[Rolyo85]

I went the extra mile to paint the "femme" stereotype which so many boys are scared of. It is homophobic to associate "masculinity" with heterosexuality and "femininity" with homosexuality. That's a fact, whether you think of yourself as homophobic or not. Internalized homophobia is not conscious.

Um, every straight man is a breeder. The term might be offensive (though I use it exclusively as a joke), but it DOES cover absolutely every heterosexual male in the world. So... what stereotyping?

 

[weinerslav]

It is homophobic to associate "masculinity" with heterosexuality and "femininity" with homosexuality

Hum, picking the straight guy is not conscious, I don't ask them for proof they ever been with a girl, is something that just happens, so, we go back to the same, how is this homophobia?

Being aware of the differences between feminine and masculine as nothing to do with homophobia, neither preferring one to the other, I don't ban people from my company, au contraire, I even had a feminine boyfriend, guess what it didn't work, for a lot of reasons, not being one of them, him being feminine, and why is so offensive to associate femininity with homosexuality? It happens, like it happens straight guys cross-dressing, and as far as I recall, recent studies stipulate more similarities between some brain activities of gay men and women than gay men and straight men, is that also offensive?

Again, you can accuse me of stereotyping, even if I was just putting out what is my reality (and I also noted that everybody is what it is, and there are also masculine gay guys), but homophobia is not associating feminine with homosexuality, and that my dear, is indeed a fact (even misogynist would be more accurate than homophobic).

And yes, breeder can be offensive, just like gay also means happy and I'm quite sure you'll see it as offensive in the right context, and I bet you would be the first to shout homophobia! (joking, but really, you're putting to much weight in my words)

And how about guys with fertility problems? Isn't breeders offensive to them just because they are straight?

 

[newbored]

Hum, picking the straight guy is not conscious, I don't ask them for proof they ever been with a girl, is something that just happens, so, we go back to the same, how is this homophobia?

Being aware of the differences between feminine and masculine as nothing to do with homophobia, neither preferring one to the other, I don't ban people from my company, au contraire, I even had a feminine boyfriend, guess what it didn't work, for a lot of reasons, not being one of them, him being feminine, and why is so offensive to associate femininity with homosexuality? It happens, like it happens straight guys cross-dressing, and as far as I recall, recent studies stipulate more similarities between some brain activities of gay men and women than gay men and straight men, is that also offensive?

Again, you can accuse me of stereotyping, even if I was just putting out what is my reality (and I also noted that everybody is what it is, and there are also masculine gay guys), but homophobia is not associating feminine with homosexuality, and that my dear, is indeed a fact (even misogynist would be more accurate than homophobic).

And yes, breeder can be offensive, just like gay also means happy and I'm quite sure you'll see it as offensive in the right context, and I bet you would be the first to shout homophobia! (joking, but really, you're putting to much weight in my words)

And how about guys with fertility problems? Isn't breeders offensive to them just because they are straight?

Spot on. The heterophobia in this place and the hypocrisy around it are DISGUSTING.

 

[Rolyo85]

Hypocrisy? What hypocrisy? Most of my closest friends - contrary to the gay stereotype, I might add - are straight MALES. I got nothing against them. I also feel almost zero attraction to them. I can almost always tell when a guy is exclusively straight, and regardless of how hot they are, I'm barely more attracted to them than I am to beautiful women.

EVEN if I used the term "breeders" offensively - which I already said I didn't; I'm a foreigner and I didn't grow up in English language culture, so words don't always have the same context for me as they do for native speakers - I'd be more than justified, considering the world of verbal and physical abuse LGBTs suffer daily from straight people. But like I said, it's not a serious insult in my mind. And most straight guys in my life don't even know it and are just entertained when they hear it.

Plus, accusations of hetero phobia - just like those of racism against whites - just don't hold. And not because those don't exist, but because when you're the dominant majority, you just don't get to play the victim. You've oppressed others for centuries, now you'll grin and bear the fruit of that ^_^

 

[newbored]

Hypocrisy? What hypocrisy? Most of my closest friends - contrary to the gay stereotype, I might add - are straight MALES. I got nothing against them. I also feel almost zero attraction to them. I can almost always tell when a guy is exclusively straight, and regardless of how hot they are, I'm barely more attracted to them than I am to beautiful women.

EVEN if I used the term "breeders" offensively - which I already said I didn't; I'm a foreigner and I didn't grow up in English language culture, so words don't always have the same context for me as they do for native speakers - I'd be more than justified, considering the world of verbal and physical abuse LGBTs suffer daily from straight people. But like I said, it's not a serious insult in my mind. And most straight guys in my life don't even know it and are just entertained when they hear it.

Plus, accusations of hetero phobia - just like those of racism against whites - just don't hold. And not because those don't exist, but because when you're the dominant majority, you just don't get to play the victim. You've oppressed others for centuries, now you'll grin and bear the fruit of that ^_^

LMFAO. I wasn't even talking to you, so chill the fuck out, LOL.

However, now that you're addressing me and that you've made the thread ABOUT YOU as is your costume, I'll retort.

"you just don't get to play the victim". LOL again. Gee, the PC Patrol homosexual men are always SOOO obsessed with keeping the monopoly of who "gets" to "play victim". They love so much to victimize themselves and relish in their self-victimization.

NO ONE has ever "oppressed" you. Stop it with this "OMG, white, christian, heterosexual men have oppressed everyone else through history!" politically correct bitching and moaning. It is stupid, pathetic, ignorant, laughable, outdated and "just doesn't hold" anymore. And "now you'll grin and bear the fruit of that". This is just pathetic. So is about revenge, then. Revenge against an entire group of human beings who have never done ANYTHING to you personally and who you see represented in people you don't even know and who have NEVER "oppressed" ANYONE.

And, yes, everyone CAN be a victim regardless of their gender or sexual orientation, but, we've seen that's something you have trouble getting through your skull, remember?

And this is the people who are always outraged with homophobia. It can go both ways. Not just because you're homosexual you get to slam and insult others without consequences.

I recommend you to grow the fuck up already, and chill the fuck out.

 

[newbored]

I'd be more than justified, considering the world of verbal and physical abuse LGBTs suffer daily from straight people.

Umm, no, actually, YOU WOULDN'T BE. I don't know what kind of twisted, distorted, fucked up, bizarro reality you live in, but the abuse some people inflict upon others, DOES NOT "justify" the abuse you could inflict upon ANYONE.

"Breeders"... You surely wouldn't like it if a "breeder" called you a "fudgepacker" or a "faggot". You know, it'd be an example of that "world of verbal and physical abuse LGBTs suffer daily from straight people" that outrages you so much.

Please stop behaving like an entitled princess throwing a tantrum, at least when you're in the "SUPPORT" forum...

 

[Rolyo85]

I wasn't aware you needed support. Please share your problem, and I'll do my best to support you ^_^

I love the whole "heterophobia" and "political correct" vocabulary being thrown around here. There is no room for any sort of equivalency, and there won't be any for many generations yet. Using a term nobody outside gay culture is even familiar with, isn't in any way comparable with the heaps of insults we encounter on a daily basis from them. Stating unpleasant facts isn't being politically correct. White Christian heterosexual men HAVE oppressed me - personally and indirectly - as well as countless other minorities of various nature. Just because you're embarrassed by people pointing it out and you maybe feel it's been beaten to death, doesn't magically make it not so.

And your post about the heterophobia and hypocrisy was directly following mine. Was I supposed to think you were just sharing random thoughts?

 

[newbored]

I wasn't aware you needed support. Please share your problem, and I'll do my best to support you ^_^

I love the whole "heterophobia" and "political correct" vocabulary being thrown around here. There is no room for any sort of equivalency, and there won't be any for many generations yet. Using a term nobody outside gay culture is even familiar with, isn't in any way comparable with the heaps of insults we encounter on a daily basis from them. Stating unpleasant facts isn't being politically correct. White Christian heterosexual men HAVE oppressed me - personally and indirectly - as well as countless other minorities of various nature. Just because you're embarrassed by people pointing it out and you maybe feel it's been beaten to death, doesn't magically make it not so.

And your post about the heterophobia and hypocrisy was directly following mine. Was I supposed to think you were just sharing random thoughts?

I NEVER said I needed "support", much less yours so don't be stupid.

You DON'T encounter "heaps" of insults from heterosexual people on a daily basis and you're extremely stupid if you think I'd ever believe that. It isn't true, be an adult, grow some balls and admit it. And I'm not embarrassed by anyone pointing anything out, I'm embarrassed by people like you who say stupid, prejudiced things and then abuse others and think that the abuse they inflict is somehow magically "justified" by some abuse some other people have inflict upon others.

And I was talking to Weinerslav, thank you very much.

I stand by my previous two posts which prove you're prejudiced and WRONG.

 

[weinerslav]

EVEN if I used the term "breeders" offensively - which I already said I didn't; I'm a foreigner and I didn't grow up in English language culture, so words don't always have the same context for me as they do for native speakers - I'd be more than justified, considering the world of verbal and physical abuse LGBTs suffer daily from straight people. But like I said, it's not a serious insult in my mind. And most straight guys in my life don't even know it and are just entertained when they hear it.

Being foreigner is not an excuse, I'm also not a native English speaker, I don't even use it in my daily routine, but you really can't see "breeders" as harmless (come on!)... Like the expression newbored used, "fudgepacker", for me it at first sight doesn't seem an insult, if I listen that out of a sexual context I would think it was an awesome cake, well now I know it is not , but if I ever used it in a sexual context or as a generalization to throw in the face of a group of people, the meaning is pretty obvious...

I agree with newbored, prejudice isn't a one way street, racism and homophobia exist and probably prevail over the opposite, but that doesn't mean the opposite is right, hate will always be hate, and I'm quite sure if a straight was attacked in a gay bar, or was refused service because he is straight, it would gather the same attention an homophobic situation would gather, being gay isn't a "get out of jail free card" you can pull when it suits you.

 

[AngolaZee]

Mmmm I'm afraid I will have to stick my neck out here and go against popular opinion. The whole point of being gay is that you are like a woman ie emotionally, sexually, psychologically. Hence you will be attracted to men, masculinity and all that it concerns. Why the hack would you be attracted to fem gays, it would be like being attracted to women in which case you may just as well be straight. So to me being attracted to straight guys should be NORM and should be the ideal attraction for a gay guy. Of course the fact that they most likely will not reciprocate is irrelevant.

Fem men/gays will be your "gals" and "sistas" but not romantic interests. This for me also explains why most gay men prefer straight acting men, who wants a woman when they are gay and supposed to be attracted to MEN. I think some of you read too much into it. If you are gay you are attracted to MEN and all they represent. So to make it sound like it is internalised homophobia or wanting what you cant have is just reading too much into it

 

[thefishinthesea23]

Mmmm I'm afraid I will have to stick my neck out here and go against popular opinion. The whole point of being gay is that you are like a woman ie emotionally, sexually, psychologically. Hence you will be attracted to men, masculinity and all that it concerns. Why the hack would you be attracted to fem gays, it would be like being attracted to women in which case you may just as well be straight. So to me being attracted to straight guys should be NORM and should be the ideal attraction for a gay guy. Of course the fact that they most likely will not reciprocate is irrelevant.

Fem men/gays will be your "gals" and "sistas" but not romantic interests. This for me also explains why most gay men prefer straight acting men, who wants a woman when they are gay and supposed to be attracted to MEN. I think some of you read too much into it. If you are gay you are attracted to MEN and all they represent. So to make it sound like it is internalised homophobia or wanting what you cant have is just reading too much into it

I am sorry, but I am going to have to disagree with everything you said. I am attracted to men, but I don't know if they are straight or gay when one gets my attention. If a man that gets my attention happens to be gay I wont lose interest in him just because he is gay... it makes no sense and I really hate how you are drawing a line between "MEN" and "gay men" being more like women. Wth?
Stopping here because it got me a bit agitated, nothing personal Angola.

Regarding the original topic, like I said I don't find straight men anymore attractive than gay men just because they are straight. Due to the fact that there are more "straight" men than gay men however I find myself being attracted to men who happen to be straight.

 

[sixthson]

I had alot of sex with straight guys...

I guess you and I have a different definition of straight.

 

[weinerslav]

I guess you and I have a different definition of straight.

LOL, I actually thought the same

Mmmm I'm afraid I will have to stick my neck out here and go against popular opinion. The whole point of being gay is that you are like a woman ie emotionally, sexually, psychologically. Hence you will be attracted to men, masculinity and all that it concerns. Why the hack would you be attracted to fem gays, it would be like being attracted to women in which case you may just as well be straight. So to me being attracted to straight guys should be NORM and should be the ideal attraction for a gay guy. Of course the fact that they most likely will not reciprocate is irrelevant.

Fem men/gays will be your "gals" and "sistas" but not romantic interests. This for me also explains why most gay men prefer straight acting men, who wants a woman when they are gay and supposed to be attracted to MEN. I think some of you read too much into it. If you are gay you are attracted to MEN and all they represent. So to make it sound like it is internalised homophobia or wanting what you cant have is just reading too much into it

Agree, it's not a law or something, but I also find feminine guys more friends than anything else, and is not about liking straight and disliking gays, is not so much a matter of sexuality, that's why I used the word masculinity before (and was misinterpreted), there are masculine gay guys also, I was just saying that I don't find them that often, I still think there is a super secret gay club where they go that I can't find lol.

 

[Rolyo85]

Mmmm I'm afraid I will have to stick my neck out here and go against popular opinion. The whole point of being gay is that you are like a woman ie emotionally, sexually, psychologically. Hence you will be attracted to men, masculinity and all that it concerns. Why the hack would you be attracted to fem gays, it would be like being attracted to women in which case you may just as well be straight. So to me being attracted to straight guys should be NORM and should be the ideal attraction for a gay guy. Of course the fact that they most likely will not reciprocate is irrelevant.

Fem men/gays will be your "gals" and "sistas" but not romantic interests. This for me also explains why most gay men prefer straight acting men, who wants a woman when they are gay and supposed to be attracted to MEN. I think some of you read too much into it. If you are gay you are attracted to MEN and all they represent. So to make it sound like it is internalised homophobia or wanting what you cant have is just reading too much into it

Do you realize how unhealthy that is? You are basically describing homosexuality as this dysfunctional thing which is only striving for the unattainable because it can't find itself sexually attractive. The point of being gay is in no way related to femininity, it just shows that your dick and your heart point to your own gender. That's it.

And how do you even imagine fem guys survive then? Obviously they also need love and relationships, but if other gay men won't provide those, then who? To me it's always been a matter of degree. I don't equate "femme" with "unattractive". I am attracted to men, and you can be femme AND manly at the same time. Once you get to the point of giving me pure woman, then it just stops working for obvious reasons.


But because we were discussing phobias, I am FAR more worried about the prevalent femmephobia in gay community than the supposed heterophobia. At least straight society has actually done something wrong by us. Fem guys are just being themselves, and the Straight Adoration Culture is ostracizing them for it. Which is by the way part of why I respond so sharply to the whole "omg I crush on straight guys". Because there are so many GAY guys who actually care about your feelings for them, but don't get them because you'd rather fetishize the straight guy... I can write a dissertation on all the psychological crap related to that.

 

[weinerslav]

And how do you even imagine fem guys survive then? Obviously they also need love and relationships, but if other gay men won't provide those, then who? To me it's always been a matter of degree.

Lol, this is just silly, really, everybody is different, lots of gay guys like feminine guys, you shouldn't crucify someone just because some guys don't! How about guys that are generally considered ugly or fat or, as someone posted on other topic, boring? Don't they deserve love also? It's up to you to prove that you're more than a creep, that you can love more than a body that will get old anyway. I dated few guys but probably it covers mostly all the general characteristics cute/ugly, thin/fat, interesting/boring, feminine/masculine and all of them had something that made me stay, eventually some also had something that made me go, but is more than obvious that you can't get stuck because of only 1 characteristic against all the rest.

 

[Rolyo85]

Oh I'm not disagreeing with you. But I've NEVER encountered a gay guy who said he was attracted to femmes. Obviously they exist, but you can't deny that there is a widespread femmephobia in the gay community, and it has more at its core than simple preference.

 

[weinerslav]

Oh I'm not disagreeing with you. But I've NEVER encountered a gay guy who said he was attracted to femmes. Obviously they exist, but you can't deny that there is a widespread femmephobia in the gay community, and it has more at its core than simple preference.

I actually know a lot of guys that like feminine gays, I always though that they where actually the biggest part of the bunch and I really think that makes your life easier, being feminine or liking feminine guys, when I was younger I was a bit more... well, innocent, and probably feminine, and they where like flies, everywhere, now, I haven't changed much physically, but I'm more mature and I'm not so obvious, the guys spend most time trying to figure you out, only when/if I put the cards on the table they have some kind of approach, well, or if I'm on a gay bar lol.

About the prejudice against women, I really don't know, I already heard about that but I really don't know anyone that would act like that, I really hope they are not that common.

 

[eastofeden]

I guess you and I have a different definition of straight.

Probably so. I have been around alot of gay men who think everyone is gay and certainly think any man who has sex with another man is "obviously gay". I disagree.

Men who are in prison have sex with other men and are not gay...same with alot of porn stars. When I think of a man being gay I think they are emotionally and physically attracted to other men. The straight men I am referring to didn't give a damn about my appearance or have any interest in me other than getting laid (fucked)...but I did not fuck them just because they were straight...I like gay men with the same mindset. The thing with the gay men that was different was that they were attracted to men but understood that sex was about sex and nothing else.

When I mention appearance...it is another reason I like straight guys...I am different than most people...I am not at all complimented when someone says I am hot...or cute...or gorgeous...I didnt' like hearing any of that and I heard it all the time when I was behind the bar. I am immediately turned off by those kinds of "compliments"...for me it is no different than saying I am ugly. They are both subjective and that is the thing I like about straight guys...they dont' care if I am good looking or ugly. It was a nice relief for me. I don't like being objectified. I would rather have someone like who I am versus what I look like. Turns out this is a good thing though because now that I am old I have no problem with aging and my appearance.

 

[JustMe5]

I don't see anything wrong with being attracted to straight men. The very definition of being gay = being attracted to men. The whole idea that a gay man should ONLY be attracted to gay men is just silly. Obviously as a gay man you're not gonna be able to become romantically involved with a straight man. But what if you're NOT looking for a relationship? What if you simply admire/appreciate and lust over straight men because you find them attractive? And besides, we all know that some straight men can be had sexually.

What I personally find attractive about straight men is their natural, innate masculinity. I have no problem whatsoever with effeminacy, but as a personal preference I'm only into masculine men. The word "masculine" gets thrown around too easily in the gay community. Some gay men who would describe themselves as masculine actually happen to be somewhat effeminate. Also, I can sometimes tell if a seemingly masculine man is gay. There's just something about him overall that causes me to realize that he's gay. He might have masculine mannerisms but something else about him serves as a telltale sign that he's gay.

It's kind of like comparing straight porn actors to gay porn actors. The straight porn guys are simply handsome and masculine and that's it, whereas usually the gay porn guys are overbuilt, overplucked, overtweezed, and so forth.

 

[Rolyo85]

Offensive stereotyping is offensive. I really don't see how the harmful effect of lusting after straight men could be any more obvious, but clearly I'm wrong.