mike121811
Virgin
- Joined
- Jun 22, 2007
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- 43
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Rundown:
During my first year of college (4 year college) I met somebody online through a CL ad. I had been living with my grandmother. I had to leave my mom's house during my junior year of highschool due to her drugs ,alcohol, and constant abuse. While living at my grandmother's, my dad (alcoholic) continued to come over and bother me and try to hit me several times. I was going to school full time and worked as a photojournalist part time. It was my dream job and I loved every second of it. I had secretly began going to doctors on campus and taking antidepressants at this time while trying to pay for it all.
I began talking to my BF online after answering a craigslist ad. He was 52 and I was 19. We had been talking for about half a year now. He lives about 400 miles away but he seemed like a very nice person that could love me and provide the affection I needed in my life. On the last day of my father attacking me, I quickly packed everything into my car and ran away to where I currently am, living at my BF's house.
Everything was okay for awhile. I've been living here for over a year now. About 2 months after moving in, I discovered emails on his computer about meeting up with other guys to give blowjobs/arrange for sex. There were several of them that occured after I moved in. I was very angry
and confronted him, and he said he had never been with anybody since I moved in. He said it was like porn to him.
He was doing rude things to me. He would engage in rigourous anal sex with me without any anal prep without a condom. I was a virgin. It hurt very much. After he would cum inside of me, he would say "shower time" and leave me there without satisfying me or anything. The last time we tried to make love - he fell asleep right in the middle of it.
A couple months passed. He began coming home late and was not interested in me sexually. We have sex maybe once a week. I would crawl in bed naked next to him and start kissing without any response on his end. I was confused - so I checked his computer again. More of the same emails - except this time - the emails went into details about when and what times he would be alone at the house (when i was in class). His Yahoo Messenger archived messages were full of messages from another man (straight) where they showed eachother on cam and went into detail with cybersex. They also arranged times to meet while I was in class.
His cell phone text messages were full of "I need someone here, when are you gonna stroke your c*ck in my mouth?" and "I need you in my hole."
He must have known I was checking his messages, because all of his messages are always deleted on his phone now.
I trusted him, and I thought that was the reason we never used a condom. He was my first and it was my understanding that as long as we are together we dont need protection. I'm afraid I may have something.
I left my job, my 4year education, my grandmother, friends - everything for him. It is now to my understanding he is just using me for his pleasure. He just wanted to break me in as a virgin and keeping bringing in other guys several times a week. I sleep next to him, I rub his back, make his dinner. And I feel used.
I don't have alot of money. I don't know where to fit a job in my school schedule. I've been doing full time at the community college. I think it's best for me to leave and try everything on my own. I never want to have a boyfriend again. Ever since I ran away I stopped taking the medication and have several strange side effects, and feel worse than before i started taking them.
I don't really have anything to look forward to in life. I will give moving out a shot and if it doesn't work - at least I tried.
During my first year of college (4 year college) I met somebody online through a CL ad. I had been living with my grandmother. I had to leave my mom's house during my junior year of highschool due to her drugs ,alcohol, and constant abuse. While living at my grandmother's, my dad (alcoholic) continued to come over and bother me and try to hit me several times. I was going to school full time and worked as a photojournalist part time. It was my dream job and I loved every second of it. I had secretly began going to doctors on campus and taking antidepressants at this time while trying to pay for it all.
I began talking to my BF online after answering a craigslist ad. He was 52 and I was 19. We had been talking for about half a year now. He lives about 400 miles away but he seemed like a very nice person that could love me and provide the affection I needed in my life. On the last day of my father attacking me, I quickly packed everything into my car and ran away to where I currently am, living at my BF's house.
Everything was okay for awhile. I've been living here for over a year now. About 2 months after moving in, I discovered emails on his computer about meeting up with other guys to give blowjobs/arrange for sex. There were several of them that occured after I moved in. I was very angry
and confronted him, and he said he had never been with anybody since I moved in. He said it was like porn to him.He was doing rude things to me. He would engage in rigourous anal sex with me without any anal prep without a condom. I was a virgin. It hurt very much. After he would cum inside of me, he would say "shower time" and leave me there without satisfying me or anything. The last time we tried to make love - he fell asleep right in the middle of it.
A couple months passed. He began coming home late and was not interested in me sexually. We have sex maybe once a week. I would crawl in bed naked next to him and start kissing without any response on his end. I was confused - so I checked his computer again. More of the same emails - except this time - the emails went into details about when and what times he would be alone at the house (when i was in class). His Yahoo Messenger archived messages were full of messages from another man (straight) where they showed eachother on cam and went into detail with cybersex. They also arranged times to meet while I was in class.
His cell phone text messages were full of "I need someone here, when are you gonna stroke your c*ck in my mouth?" and "I need you in my hole."
He must have known I was checking his messages, because all of his messages are always deleted on his phone now.
I trusted him, and I thought that was the reason we never used a condom. He was my first and it was my understanding that as long as we are together we dont need protection. I'm afraid I may have something.
I left my job, my 4year education, my grandmother, friends - everything for him. It is now to my understanding he is just using me for his pleasure. He just wanted to break me in as a virgin and keeping bringing in other guys several times a week. I sleep next to him, I rub his back, make his dinner. And I feel used.
I don't have alot of money. I don't know where to fit a job in my school schedule. I've been doing full time at the community college. I think it's best for me to leave and try everything on my own. I never want to have a boyfriend again. Ever since I ran away I stopped taking the medication and have several strange side effects, and feel worse than before i started taking them.
I don't really have anything to look forward to in life. I will give moving out a shot and if it doesn't work - at least I tried.
