Could you be friends with someone who opposed gay marriage?

[DiamondSkin]

Yes, I already am. One of my best friends is a Bible thumpin' Southern Baptist. He opposes gay marriage and I oppose a lot of his beliefs. It doesn't stop us from enjoying each other's company on a wide spectrum of other activities.

So a KKK member and a black man can still be friends.

If you believe a man with racist views and disagrees with interracial marriage can be friends with an African-American, than your view is respected.

 

[DiamondSkin]

Yes. If there's respect, you'll get on fine together.

There is no respect to begin with.

If you're against gay marriage and think it should not be legalized and think gays should not be allowed to have a fundamental right while everyone else does, he's a homophobe.

Thus ends the respect.

He or she does not respect you. He or she thinks you're not worthy, equal or to have the RESPECT of having equal rights in a land of freedom.

You are less to him or her.

 

[DiamondSkin]

But, children, let's be honest. We are in the process of overturning a 150,000 year old empire of thought with a radical concept that we dreamed and schemed up five minutes ago.

Slavery says hi. Slavery was around since man could walk.

Saying that all men, women and children should be free and that is was both morally and legally wrong to own a person against his or her will was a very radical thing to say for thousands of years.

 

[sabot3ur]

babigaypimp, many institutions performed our outer space marriages themselves thousands of years ago.

then they changed their minds and said it was 1 man 1 woman.

so yeah, no.

 

[Pushyourluck]

I would ignore them.

If I were already friends with them and I found out their stance on gay marriage I would try to have a debate about why they think they are entitled to more rights than other people in the world.

If it was a family member, I might be more tolerant but probably not because the old "you can choose your friends but not your family" line never stuck well with me anyway. It's bullshit. You can choose who you have in your life. So i'd probably disown that family member.

All these are hypotheticals though beacause thankfully whatever friends and family I do have tend to be more liberal than your average Joe.

 

[fetaby]

What are you trying to say, fetaby?

I've seen you post some good things in this thread, but you won't get your point across with riddles. Or are you now making a joke of something that some of us find to be a really serious matter?

I'm tryyyying to say, that sometimes it gets so damn thick that you have to laugh to keep from crying.

It's a very real thing that gay marriage is being tossed around state legislatures at this moment, no?

It's also a real thing that in order for society to be accepting of gay people. We must first, gain exposure.
Second, gain tolerance.
And then from that, once our rights are secured we have a little wriggle room to decide what may or may not be right with in the doctrine and dogma.

Women's rights and Civil rights have been hard won in many cases. This issue will lead to a big ass fight. It will be the media's sensation baby for months as we cry out foul, and the oppression continues.

I don't know all the answers, I doubt anyone does. But I do know this.
all damn day, never got many people anywhere. And for someone whose dick gets hard at the prospect of a juicy ass or a nice pair of dsl, to bury their head in the sand, and essentially say I'm not worth fighting for, because they find contention within their own life. Well that man can kiss my ass, it seems he will have the time to do so as he doesn't seem to be doing nothing else.

This is why this country sucks, we have too much misguided pride. Instead of thinking of the well being of others, we so often only think of ourselves. "I can't/won't support gay marriage, and I'm gay is the biggest load of horse poop I've ever seen. And this is why, because to deny yourself the joy and love and trust and rights and benefits and comfort and responsibility really is just like saying you don't deserve to any of those things. I'm not straight, and I'm also not you.

Blah, fuck it. When the time comes I'm moving. Stay here with the haters getting hit in the head with rocks and insults and stares and whispers if you want.

If the mood in the community somehow shifted into one of ideal unity, all for one and one for all, I might be persuaded to stick around and fight it out with you'se guys. I can't help those unwilling to help themself. And that includes deluded gay men.

 

[fetaby]

^ See. That was so much better, and very well said!

You make good points...and I couldn't agree with you more.

It's becoming an exercise in futility.

This page fills up and then next misguided mal adjusted individual doesn't bother to read what has already been typed.

What happened to fuck the police?

I never thought I would live to see the day, that I would have to tell another gay man, You're here, YOU'RE QUEER, GET USED TO IT!

Complacency is the

You think all is good and gravy cause you got to see that really gay guy on Will and Grace? Or you never miss an episode of Queer Eye.

You want to continue deluding your self that because gay men have comedic lap dog roles in the media, we have won something. They are laughing at you, BRUNO.

Once agian, invite yourself to the tax "table" of marriage. See how fast you get bounced on your ass.

This is something within our grasp, we can fucking taste it like precum on a jock stap.

Why in the fuck are you still gun shy?

Are you afraid you can't keep it up?

That you suffer from "life" disfunction? Well guess what, They make a pill for that too.

Fuck it, I'm moving to Canado to get married. Then I'm buying a yacht and cruising the world with me man. Well go in search of other mythical creatures, cause apparently I'm right next to pegasus and mermaids being a monogamous committed in love gay man that wants nothing more than to experience the same joy and hardship that is marriage that my own parents have been afforded the right to have.

 

[NineOfClubs]

I've said it before, but why not be friends with such a person, if you had other shared interests?

I have friends who are religious (I'm not), who are vegetarians (I'm not), who own guns and hunt (I don't)---I could go on and on......

 

[fetaby]

I've said it before, but why not be friends with such a person, if you had other shared interests?

I have friends who are religious (I'm not), who are vegetarians (I'm not), who own guns and hunt (I don't)---I could go on and on......

please go on and on, cause so far you haven't stated any interests that hold your potential rights above your head.

Chase the rights, any way you can. If that means remaining friends so as to needle them into seeing the light, then by all means do so. But if they are a true friend, let them go. If they return,and butterflies and bullshit.

So tell me one thing, and I'll leave you alone, you use the word interests. That would imply interesting or interested. Do your friends find it interesting that you are not afforded the same rights as them? Are your friends interested in keeping you classified as a second class citizen.

Horses and man go way back. They are great friends, they use eachother. But when the whip comes out, and the spurs are used. Is there any question which is slave and which is master?

 

[fetaby]

If they are actively participating in some kind of activity to stop the progress of it, then probably not. However, if it came up in casual conversation that they didn’t agree with same sex marriage, then that’s just their point of view. I don’t care. Personally, I don’t feel mired or impeded by other peoples plain beliefs. Actions speak louder than words. We can disagree with a multitude of topical issues. So long as they aren’t trying to coerce or push their thinking on me, then they are more than entitled to feel however way they want about whatever they want. To answer the question: generally, yes I could be friends with someone who opposed same sex marriage…just like I could be with someone who supported it.

Two things.

1. As I read your post here, I glanced over atcha post count.. Are you the devil?

2. On actions... The actions of straight people are very much where we must apply the pressure, and sway the hand.

In the meantime? I will find contention and take task to any "gay" person who uses inaction as a means of furtherment of the status quo.

If that is the case? Get the fuck out of my face. Go stand in front of a mirror and talk all you want to yourself, as you have absolutely nothing to say to me.

That is all.

 

[boxerdudeuk]

If they don't respect gay marriage, they don't respect you.

that is such bullshit. i can absolutely love and respect and honor and trust someone without necessarily holding their belief systems or political leanings as my own.

if you demand that every single one of your friends holds your same values - then you've got a lot to learn about life and relationships.

 

[boxerdudeuk]

You're equating prejudice and discrimination with 'belief'.

If I believe that blacks shouldn't be allowed to marry whites, it's a-okay as long as I claim it's a belief?

And I suppose all those people whose 'belief' says that gays are going to hell or they shouldn't be allowed to teach is just a differing opinion to be respect.

Bullshit.




I'll respect a belief. I will not respect intolerance, prejudice or discrimination.

That's the difference between you in me.

When you get gay-bashed on the side of the street, please don't press charges.

After all, they were just practicing their beliefs.

i'm not even going to comment on your fucking ABSURD comparison.

 

[dynk]

The majority of my friends are straight and most of them say: let them get married also.

 

[Críostóir]

I've said it before, but why not be friends with such a person, if you had other shared interests?

I have friends who are religious (I'm not), who are vegetarians (I'm not), who own guns and hunt (I don't)---I could go on and on......

But this is a different kind of belief, one that holds that you should not have a right which they take for granted, that is, the right to marry any adult you choose to (assuming mutual consent and the observation of consanguinity rules).

that is such bullshit. i can absolutely love and respect and honor and trust someone without necessarily holding their belief systems or political leanings as my own.

if you demand that every single one of your friends holds your same values - then you've got a lot to learn about life and relationships.

Again, holding beliefs in general is one thing, and holding beliefs ABOUT YOU is another.

If they believed that gay people should be paid half as much just for being gay, or that gay people should be denied the right to vote, would you still be friends with them? If so...well, I think that shows a lack of self-respect.

 

[luminum]

I have friends who probably wouldn't be the first to sign up to support gay marriage, but I don't believe I have any who fundamentally believe that it is wrong. If I did, and even with those friends of mine who have reservations, that would indicate that what friendship we do have hasn't dealt with the fundamental issues of discrimination and prejudice between us.

You can enjoy someone's company regardless of what they believe, but that doesn't mean that your friendship is based upon mutual respect and human dignity--just that you have a shared interest. Somewhere in their beliefs, you are not on an equal level to them when it comes to basic fairness and equality. That's a real issue, but it doesn't mean that at least on a superficial level, they can't tell a good joke or play a mean game of cards.

The same goes with friends I have who still have issues of racism to deal with. We may be friends on some level, but if the friendship were to ever get stronger, then these would be fundamental issues that would have to be addressed.

 

[BabiGayPimp]

Slavery says hi. Slavery was around since man could walk.

Saying that all men, women and children should be free and that is was both morally and legally wrong to own a person against his or her will was a very radical thing to say for thousands of years.

Oh please man. Not being able to marry your boyfriend is not the same as being subjected to slavery, torture, and genocide. Get real. When we make these kinds of questionable comparisons, that's when we lose credibility AND lose support among black evangelicals who rightfully reject the analogy.

 

[Críostóir]

Oh please man. Not being able to marry your boyfriend is not the same as being subjected to slavery, torture, and genocide. Get real. When we make these kinds of ridiculous comparisons, that's when we lose credibility AND lose support among black evangelicals who rightfully reject the analogy.

That isn't an analogy! It's a refutation of the idea that because an institution has been around for a long time, it's worth preserving in its present form.

In the case of marriage, it's present form hasn't even been around that long.

 

[bankside]

Oh please man. Not being able to marry your boyfriend is not the same as being subjected to slavery, torture, and genocide. Get real. When we make these kinds of questionable comparisons, that's when we lose credibility AND lose support among black evangelicals who rightfully reject the analogy.

No; it is part of a very similar continuum of discrimination however. The parallels are all there, from random killings overlooked by the authorities to hitler's pink triangle and death camps, to shock treatment, testosterone injections, jail sentence on nothing more than suspicion. There is more in common that black evangelicals need to acknowledge, otherwise they would be wrong. We'd be wrong to give them a pass to remain ignorant too.

The parents of black evangelicals never turned them in for being black...never sent them to the psych ward for being black, never watched their kids kill themselves for being black and then whispered a silent prayer that "it was for the best."

When black evangelical leaders acknowledge that history, then we'll talk.

 

[Críostóir]

Btw, recorded human history is nowhere near 150,000 years old. The best available evidence currently suggests written language wasn't even invented until about 10,000 years ago.

Not only that, recording history as we understand it today (writing down what happened just as it happened) was invented much later than that. The only people who were doing that 3,000 years ago were the Ancient Egyptians, and even they erased things that were not favorable to the current Pharaoh.

Yes, parts of the Bible are older than that, but a) they weren't written down until much more recently, and b) they were not intended as history, and don't record events as they happened.

 

[braex27]

I can, and am.

I have said to him, "If and when gay marriage is legalised, and I decide to marry, I will send you an invite and you can decide whether you wish to attend."