"Do you have a girlfriend?"

[MisterMajestic]

I just roll my eyes in disbelief that someone who cuts hair could have such lousy gaydar.

Remember Swellegant we're talking about a "Barber Shop" not a women's Salon....Based on barber-shop "talk" most barbers tend to prefer "Pussy" so their Gaydar is usually in off-mode...

 

[MarkMySpoT]

i am not sure why but recently the questioned changed from "do you have a girlfriend?" to "why don't you have a girlfriend?" either way my response is just that i am not ready.

 

[BearBoi]

i am not sure why but recently the questioned changed from "do you have a girlfriend?" to "why don't you have a girlfriend?" either way my response is just that i am not ready.

Holy shit, somebody actually asked you why you don't have a girlfriend?

Even if you were str8, what kind of a fucked up question is that?

"Gee, I don't know, I guess I'm ugly. Or maybe I smell. Or maybe I'm too shy. Thanks for making me reflect on the fact that I'm fucking ALONE."

 

[MarkMySpoT]

Holy shit, somebody actually asked you why you don't have a girlfriend?

Even if you were str8, what kind of a fucked up question is that?

"Gee, I don't know, I guess I'm ugly. Or maybe I smell. Or maybe I'm too shy. Thanks for making me reflect on the fact that I'm fucking ALONE."

i guess it is a cultural thing. older filipinos just tend to ask nosy personal questions. the girlfriend thing isnt too bad. i have also been asked several times why i am not married and have kids yet... oh well c'est la vie.

 

[Audio Tech]

Generally a simple "No". Sometimes I'll say that I'm happy living without all the drama.

 

[doctorsun]

I usually just say "no" and leave it at that. If they dig any deeper, then it may come out that I'm gay, but that's only happened once in my life. Usually, the person asking really doesn't give a shit and is just asking to be polite and make small talk and has no desire to ask any further questions on the matter.

 

[Tadaa]

i always get asked that and i'm not afraid to say "no". i'm not out of the closet but i have no shame in saying i dont have a girlfriend, or a boyfriend for that matter

Go get yourself a boyfriend

 

[desmond]

Go get yourself a boyfriend

Get me one too, as long as you're up ;-)

 

[desmond]

I found a gold ring once, this is so Tolkien, but I wore it as a wedding ring, thinking it woukd make me invisible? Or that the awkward hits would stop. It was interesting. I don't know why I didn't anticipate a woman asking "so, you're married?"

 

[bankside]

"No, actually, I don't date women. You?"

or now, "No, I'm engaged.." That one kinds confuses them.

 

[freefall]

I usually say, "No, too busy studying."

Well, that's because I'm single

 

[USEDCAR]

BearBoi i love the cooties thing I'm going to start using that.


Im still in the closet but i just say im not interested in having a girlfriend i don't want the stress. And before they ask another question i change the subject

Its funny my mother thinks my lack of interest in girls is because i haven't matured and discovered girls yet.

 

[evanrick]

usually its guys that ask me if i have a girlfriend. i dont know how to take it...

 

[Entity]

"Certainly a handsome young man like you has a pretty girl to go home to."

"Nope, relationships are way too expensive."


I'm pretty sure I play the expensive card way often.

 

[Toy-Boy]

I don't consider myself noticeably gay, but I am clockable to people with good gaydar. Doesn't bother me, because I'm openly gay anyway.

However, I don't get that question as much as I did when I was growing up. Sometimes I'll get a clueless, elderly man or woman that asks me, and I'll reply with "oh, heavens no.." And look at me all crazy. The great thing about comfortable with your sexuality, you don't care if people think you're gay or straight. People can think what they want. Doesn't matter.

 

[braex27]

I just say no, and move on with the conversation.

 

[evanrick]

i want to know why people want to know this in the first place. i can understand a girl asking, which is ballsy, but why do guys ask this?

 

[LiquidSky]

How do you respond to this question, in general?

I say, "No. I'm a man who loves men."

 

[Swellegant]

Remember Swellegant we're talking about a "Barber Shop" not a women's Salon....Based on barber-shop "talk" most barbers tend to prefer "Pussy" so their Gaydar is usually in off-mode...

Well, there's your problem right there. You walk into a sexist establishment and you get sexist remarks. But if a man is going to touch my head, to trim it or dye it or check it for lice, I'd like him to at least pretend to be a gentleman and display a certain amount of tact.

Making girlfriend references to a complete stranger is tactless. Maybe he doesn't have a girlfriend and is unhappy about it. Maybe his girlfriend just broke up with him. Maybe he's gay. Maybe he's married. Maybe he's struggling with the celibacy required by the priesthood. How do you know?

When I get a haircut (or a manicure, or a physical), we stick to neutral topics: weather, local news, maybe my job, how was my day, etc. If the sweet little old Romanian lady who usually cuts my hair started nosing into my private life (and while my sexual identity is not private, the person or persons with whom I am sexually active are) I wouldn't tip her and I wouldn't go back to her.

And the only difference between a barber and a hairdresser is that the former can shave you while the latter can give you highlights. Otherwise it's the exact same training in the exact same establishments. Yes, perhaps straight men become barbers more frequently than gays, while gays are more likely to become hairdressers; however, that's a stereotype and the truth is that there are a lot of gay barbers and a lot of straight hairdressers...and the people in that fraternity know each other.

Finally, when I was speaking for myself, anybody who can't tell I'm gay, be they barber or hairdresser, gay or straight, man or woman, has got to be pretty dense... hence the eye-rolling.

 

[MyReply]

Ironically, yesterday after my mother saw me with my new haircut, she said "now you can get a girlfriend."

Yeah...