Excessive phyiscal contact from a staight guy?

[Just_Believe18]

I'm unfamiliar with "furrydom" so I can't judge his behavior if this is a big thing for him.

Certainly unusual and I can understand your confusion!

Look at it this way. He receives pleasure by being physically affectionate with you. He's comfortable enough to even sleep on top of you. It's cute. I believe there is nothing wrong in reciprocating his affections. Don't do anything he won't do to you first. But there's nothing wrong with stroking his hair while he's sleeping on you. Poking him back, etc. can be pleasurable for you too.

Who knows, maybe he might take it up a notch?

 

[Lewis1]

Asking "why" may imply you don't want him to do it anymore, and I'm guessing that's not the message you want to send. So perhaps another approach is in order. Obviously, it'd be easier if you were just out, but since you're not, you'll have to do a bit of fishing.

Again, next time the physicality starts, look for an opening. (No, not like that!) Look for a chance to give him an opportunity to take it further. If he grabs you from behind and says, "Surprise buttsex!" (I'm guessing that's what he said), just smile and say "I prefer my buttsex to not be such a surprise. It's more fun if I have a chance to prepare." If you're wrestling, or he's resting on you, as it comes to an end, ask (again, with a smile) "maybe we can continue this later?"

If he just laughs these comments off, don't pursue it. But if he asks "what did you have in mind", just shrug and say, "I dunno. Why don't you swing by my room tonight and we'll figure it out?"

Lex

^^^^ thats a great way to approach it . non assuming ans subtle

Not that last sentence though its too foreward like woah

but um I honestly think he sees you as a play brother in a way
i think its charming lol

but if you think there is more to the story you have to do something "questionable"

 

[Lewis1]

lol, it does not seem like you're taking advantage of him at all. Man, from your info its almost like this person is head over heels for you, is trying to get closer to you by using the "playful" method that hopefully you can understand him. He's doing all these weird things to get your attention. On very rare occasion will a straight guy be comfortable hugging, touching, and laying on top of another straight guy to sleep. Playfully having physical contact with you infront of others is not a prove, but laying on top of you resting in a very comfortable way is enough proof. its wayyyyy too obvious.

Here's a theory. He knows you'll be leaving soon and he doesn't want to waste the opportunities and he's taking all the chances he can to tell you. Being an open character and funny and all doesn't mean they can be open about their sexuality.

You're too tensed and too serious! you need to loosen down. Take the chances and at the next opportunity that you guys are together in private.. or when he's resting on top of you... please give him a kiss!

You're like Mr. Serious here and maybe that is why he's afraid of you! You don't yell at him for being close contact, but you seem to be either completely oblivious or ignoring him. You're making the poor guy asking himself "is (you) interested in me or not, if he is then how come he's not doing anything."

There is only so much a guy can do to tell you he's f-ing crazy for you, you need to be the person to take a step further! good luck.

Excellent^^^^

 

[Eeyore]

I had a friend like this back in high school. He was very touchy-feely. At the same time though, he was very much a straight guy.

For him, he didn't see anything wrong with physical contact between him and other guys, because either he was really secure with himself, or just naive enough to think that he'd be able to tell if someone was gay, and not do it with them.

He did it with everyone in a group of friends, but for some reason was that way with me more than others. Probably because I had something of a crush on him, and enjoyed it, so I let him take it a little further than the other guys would. However, as soon as I started to do anything back towards him, he got uncomfortable and would stop.

I think he was nothing more than a good guy who liked to be close to his friends, but at the same time it would be really easy to misread signals, so you have to be careful.

Of course, I could be completely wrong, and he was trying to tell me something, and both of us were too scared to just come out and say anything, and missed a good opportunity, but that's life...

 

[Eternaldarkness]

Eeyore, missed opportunities sucks. Sometimes you can never find out the truth if you've missed 'em.
_______________________________

P700granat, I truly understand what you meant..totally. Afterall, you are the only person that does know what is happening between you two than the rest of us. I like the fact that you tends to rule out the possibilities in a more realistic way, because it truly does help prevent any disastrous endings.

So now the conclusion we all came upon is that he is a playful, openminded, cheerful straight guy. That doesn't mean he doesn't have a tad-bit of curiousity in him. I think you should be more playful and start sending out some more hints. Might as well enjoy the fun ride hehehe.

If you truly believe that he is not "crazy" for you and that maybe he has no interest at all, then it is a good idea to keep things very simple. Nothing out of boundaries when it comes to flirting.

I also think what you mention is true. Maybe he is curious about your sexuality and that is the reason why you recieve more attention from him

Whatever happens, I hope you will have the best through this experience.

I was not going to let this reply be personal at all but ... now it is. LOL. one thing I like to point out is: Believe it or not, I was once a straight guy who never even imagined that I had any sexuality questionings up until I was 16 years old.

Then there comes that one day when you wake up and curiosity takes in. We are now more exposed to the media sending us images and advice that it is "okay to be" and that heightens my curiousity even further.

Lets not drift off the topic shall we, lol we'll save that part of the story for another thread.

I guess, what I am trying to tell you is that I am coming off of this with the ideas of an ex-straight guy also. I mean I'm sure that I am not the only one who use to claim himself as straight, but from my own personal point of view... as comfortable it is for a straight man to be with his gay friends, there are boundaries he'll keep when it comes to playfully touching. A Straight man that has no intentions or curiousity will not cross these boundaries with his gay friends or even straight friends because he does not want to cause confusions. Touching, pulling, playfully hugging and wrestling, even naughty things like biting, squeezing, and caressing can all be funny things straight guys do to each other.

Laying on top of your straight friends to sleep is rarely, if any comfort for any straight guy to do. It is highly uncommon. Honest is, laying on top of any person (that you have absolutely no interest with) is uncomfortable.

When he did that, it questioned two things: If he was straight, how can he be comfortable laying on top of another straight men in such an intimate way. Unless you consider a person laying on top of another person a non-intimate and a common thing to do. If he was straight, and he just likes the idea of touching and being close to another guy, wouldn't he be afraid he's sending off confusing thoughts?

Maybe, just mabye, those things you thought that was unintentional, playfully, and naughty things was infact all intended?

Gosh, now I know how you're feeling. I'm going wacky myself. hahahaha.

 

[KaraBulut]

Taking a slightly different perspective on this-

Have you ever known a gay man who is always hugging, touching and kissing his straight female friends? Ever notice that the women friends don't seem to mind? Ever notice that the same gay man doesn't run around hugging and kissing his straight male friends?

That's because there is little to no sexual interest/sexual tension between gay men and straight women. And the women send subtle signals that it's ok- they like the affection and they like the fact that it ends at affection (i.e. no sex).

On the other hand, there's a lot of sexual tension between gay men and straight men (not to mention a lot of forum posts on the same). A gay man hugging and touching straight guys usually makes the straight guys uncomfortable.

And ever notice that when a gay guy is touchy-feely with his straight female friends, no one ever asks, "He touches women a lot- maybe he's straight?".

So, this is the reverse of that scenario. You've got a straight guy who is very touchy feely. If he were to be this way with female friends, it would have a sexual undertone that would make it uncomfortable for the women. On the other hand, a straight guy being touchy-feely with another guy is dismissed as male-bonding or being "huggy" because there is no sexual tension between straight guys indulging in horse-play with other guys.

The difference here is that- unbeknownst to him- the straight guy is being affection with a gay guy. And I suspect the gay guy likes it.

 

[Ron Apple]

Well, i think that he may be bisexual and is just taking advantage of the situation. For another guy to comfortably sleep ON another guy is definitely not what 2 straight people would do.

If I were you, the worst thing i would want now is to make the situation awkward. I would rather just sit back and enjoy the poking and prodding and the occasional wrestle Perhaps during those wrestling sessions, you should try and "accidentally" let your hand slip or something.

On the other hand, if you decide to keep things as it is now, then you stand the chance of him finding out bout your sexuality. Then he may think that you were exploiting him and that you didn't tell him cz you were scared that he may stop the touchy-touchy.

Well, i think you should just keep enjoying the situation as it is and I think you also need to start poking and getting touchy-touchy with him. If he tells you to back off or gets angry, then you know that he is not gay/bi... Its sorta the opposite of what you do

Keep us updated
Ron

 

[rareboy]

...yank down his pants and blow him.

See how that goes.

I suspect he'll be quite grateful.

 

[xi3100]

i think is cute, if anything say you know im gay and if he keeps doing it then at least you warned him ...

 

[Atomw7]

I didn't read all the replies, but basically all furries are very touchy. Even straight ones.

 

[D8Na2R]

LOL...the FURRY thing worries me more than anything...what is that all about??

 

[KaraBulut]

LOL...the FURRY thing worries me more than anything...what is that all about??

You would be surprised how many Furries there are out there. They have conventions (FurFest!). They have their own culture in Second Life.

Quite fascinating, actually.

 

[Atomw7]

You would be surprised how many Furries there are out there. They have conventions [strike](FurFest!)[/strike](Furcons!). They have their own culture in Second Life.

Quite fascinating, actually.

Fixed....

 

[KaraBulut]

You would be surprised how many Furries there are out there. They have conventions (FurFest!)(Furcons!). They have their own culture in Second Life.

Quite fascinating, actually.

Fixed....

Sidebar. Talk amongst yourselves...

So, Atom-acious... did they change the convention names? I talked with a few FurFans a couple of years ago and I asked about their culture. Most were gamers. Most were liberals. Most claimed very ambiguous sexuality. They mentioned some big get-together they had in Philly or Pittsburgh or somewhere in Penn- I remember they referred to it by an odd name but remarked that there were other FurFests that occurred around the country.

Does FurCon refer to their conventions in general or to the particular event in Pennsylvania?

 

[Atomw7]

Sidebar. Talk amongst yourselves...

So, Atom-acious... did they change the convention names? I talked with a few FurFans a couple of years ago and I asked about their culture. Most were gamers. Most were liberals. Most claimed very ambiguous sexuality. They mentioned some big get-together they had in Philly or Pittsburgh or somewhere in Penn- I remember they referred to it by an odd name but remarked that there were other FurFests that occurred around the country.

Does FurCon refer to their conventions in general or to the particular event in Pennsylvania?

Well, furcons are in general, but there's also one specific (FURther CONvention) that's HUGE. There's also AC (AnthroCon- second biggest- in Pittsburgh), FWA (Furry Weekend Atlanta), MFF, MFM, and a lot more.... Not that I would know, though.

 

[KaraBulut]

Re:Excessive physical contact from a straight guy?

Hmmm. I also recall that they were also into Furry art and drawings which seems to connect with their love of avatars and gaming.

Not that I would know, though.

We'd rather you stick with the towels than the fur suits, any way.

 

[Atomw7]

Re: Excessive physical contact from a straight guy

Hmmm. I also recall that they were also into Furry art and drawings which seems to connect with their love of avatars and gaming.



We'd rather you stick with the towels than the fur suits, any way.

Haha.... my ex is (a?) furry. I went to the conventions and such with him, but now he works the FWA one. I refused to wear a collar (except in bed ) or a tail.

Whoa, derail! Back on topic.

 

[DGlookin]

I had the same thing happen with a younger coworker. He was very physical and always pulling his shirt up in front of me but not around the other guys. He asked me questions about sex several times and whatnot. I just played along and told myself nothing was going to happen.

 

[p700granat]

Sorry I haven't updated for almost a week. I was really busy with schoolwork this past week, and so was my feely-touchy friend who was away for an interview for three days and is still working hard to catch up. We met only a few times last week, and even when we met we were mostly talking about the course we are both taking. I started to get less busy since yesterday, and was hoping to hang out and maybe get a nice back rub from him as my shoulders are hurting me. But I decided not to as I know he's still busy working on a project and he's already late for that. Today was different. He and his roommate came up by my room and asked me to go to dinner (while I was to the JUB Eye-Candies and had to quickly buckle up when he knocked on my door. He almost caught me.). I decided to sit right next to him and we spent an hour in the dinning-hall which is much longer than usual.

The touching and poking started as soon as I sat down and became almost non-stop after he's done with food. At some point during dinner he announced (to everyone sitting at the table), "Look! XX (my name) is sitting right next to me". You see, I often avoid sitting right next to or opposite to him during dinners with our group of friends, to SHOW that I don't like getting poked or touched. But this time I responsed "Well it is not unintentional", which is true because I want to get a back rub. He looked at me for a few seconds and announced, "So XX (my name) likes me!". I blushed and lied "that is not true", which I immediately regretted saying so and added "but you're free to interpret it that way." I should have said something much less stupid but I guess I got a bit embarresed. Later for reasons I forgot, he also bit me on my arm, and exclaimed "XX is sweaty". I laughed and said "well, now you know why you shouldn't bite me again." He also pulled the skin on my face and on my belly and declared "XX is not stretchy" (my skin is not very elastic). In return I did the same to him, who is a lot "stretchier".

This is just a quick update and to give you an impression of a typical dinner if I sit next to him (foot/legs will get more attention if I sat just opposite to him). It will usually continue as we head back to our dorm, in the hallway (where the whole body often gets exercised), and if I have some time, in his room. I really enjoyed it and would return favor whenever appropriate, but I'm also afraid of being too obvious, espeically since we almost always hang out within a group of friends.

I'll respond to some of previous threads (esp. regarding to Furries) tomorrow.

 

[Diodorus]

Hmmm. I think you may be having an alternate reality thing happening. It seemed your friend was checking out your human textural qualities...sweaty, stretchy. Start checking for alien signs in your group of friends. You may be the only human...