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Feel like crap...

G-Lexington

G-Lexington

Lex. Icon. Devil.
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You've got the right idea. Cut yourself off from him for the time being. Then, while you're doing that, go find yourself a guy who might actually return the attraction. Once you've got yourself a boyfriend, you'll see this straight-guy crush as the silly thing it actually is. :)

Lex
 
At first i believed i was the only one who felt this way. Literally EVERYTIME i think of him i get short of breath as if i was having another asthma attack. Falling in love with a straight guy is downright self-torture, but its something that inexplicably happens to me ALOT.
I tried the cut him off thing and, to be perfectly honest, after about 3 months, i felt i could live without him, without wanting him to feel for me what i felt for him, even though i seen him almost everyday(that was pretty hard) i avoided all other contact with him(speaking, sitting next to him, even looking at him for more than 3 sec.) and eventually when i thought of him i felt nothing.
But the way i came about this was totally wrong, i was a complete bitch to him. i told him i didnt want his friendship, and when he asked for an explanation i didnt have an answer at first, but soon i lied and told him that he was starting to annoy me. he continued to ask how, and telling me that hes sorry for whatever he does and that he wont do it again(OMFUCKINGgosh he is so sweet and cute) but i told him that we just couldnt be friends. So one day i just stopped talking to him, he would say hi, or attempt to have a conversation, and i would give him the dirtiest look and dismiss any talking. and then it got to the point where i guess he was tired of my shit and he stopped talking to me (but this was a good thing, or so i thought).
after a couple of months i began to feel bad that i ended it that way, so on some random day i said hello, and he just smiled sooo big and hard, and said "you spoke to me!" as if it was his birthday. and i fucking fell... so fucking hard.... again. even now, as im writing this, i cant breathe, and im crying.
i wish there was a way i could just forget i ever met him, but its soo damn hard to leave him alone, and now im at a lost to do, i feel like life would be meaningless if i dont end up with him. hes the only one that ive ever felt so strong for, and i know i have a long life ahead of me, but i feel like i will unfortunately be in love with him for the rest of it:(
so help us both out.
 
Marky, meet fireballz. Fireballz, meet Marky.


That's how you do it. You can't get over someone by just willing yourself to get over him. The more you think about how you don't want to think about him, the more you think about him.

Put your energy into meeting and talking with other guys. Even if it's just online, start getting to know someone else like you, and pursue getting to know that person. We nearly always do better when we run towards something than when we try to run away.
 
heh, I just made a similar post in a new thread before seeing this one-
 
just curious right, marky, fireballz, are you guys still friends with these guys or did you cut them out completely?do you still talk to them? and marky if you tried to avoid him why is it that you saw him almost everyday?
 
Killjoy and lex are right, you two should go find other gay/bi men who can return your feelings, even if its online. okcupid.com is a good place to start. I know crushes really do CRUSH you or whatever, but they come and go, and before you know you'll find someone else to crush on and you'll forget about your current straight Boy Crush. But yeah, the best thing to do is redirect the energy at someone else, preferably someone who isn't straight.

And Marky7511, you should apologize to your friend, he seems like a nice person and doesn't deserve to be ignored like that. Explain him your situation and he'll probly understand - if not, the at least you'll see the bad side of him for once and become unattracted to him.
 
just take steps to meeting gay men and it will help you

when your focus is on one entity, it becomes your whole world
 
firstplace: we are hi and bye friends, i cant stand to have a conversation with him, because i fear we'll end up on the topic of girls(im a closet clase:(). i seen him everyday because we had a class together, we use to sit next to each other but i couldnt bare the bullshit i had to hear about which girls are hot and which ones he wants to hookup with. but i feel like i cant live without him.

i understand what you guys are saying about finding gay/bi guys to like, but for some strange reason im just not turned on by gay guys, when i know they're gay it just doesnt work for me... i have no idea why. i guess i consumed myself with the whole turning a straight person out fantasy for so long, that now im just totally attracted to guys who are hard to get with.

to be honest, i think im torturing myself for being bi, i never liked it, and im still not comfortable with the fact that i am, but its definitely something i cant help....
 
To Marky,

You are at a very important place in your life right now and the choices you make will now mean the difference between being a happy, successful adult or being a fucked-up head case.

You are obviously very, very young so i don't expect you to have fully developed or rational responses to situations but the time has come for you to start thinking like an adult.

So you're bi. Or gay.

Celebrate the fact that you are.

At this stage, I think like many young guys struggling with coming out and/or accepting and loving yourself that you like straight guys because it is so much easier than having to search out and develop a relationship with a gay guy. It is great. You get to piss and moan about how you can never have them and never have to invest real emotional effort in loving someone completely.

So first. Come to terms with who you are and how great it could be if you put as much effort into your life.

Next. Don't be a dramatic, emo dick who treats their friends like shit. At some point you need to be honest with them as well and tell them that you are trying to figure out your sexuality and need to have some distance from them because you are afraid that you might be confusing deep filial love for something else.

Next. Be happy for them as they develop relationships with their girls.

Get out there and spend the time with guys you can have. Who knows. One of them could be the love and light of your life.

Oh. And if you do manage to fuck a 'straight' guy. It won't make you straight. And it won't mean that you are straight either.
 
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