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Friend wants piece of me?

I think you should just ask him if he'd sleep with another guy. This does not commit you to anything. But you can judge his reaction accordingly.

Don't talk about yourself, but probe the subject in your own way by talking about a hypothetical situation. i.e. some conversation starters:
  • Did you ever find another guy hot ?
  • Another version that's more subtle: did you ever find another guy really cool but couldn't figure out why he's so cool ? (hidden meaning: you find him cool but can't explain it as you find the guy attractive, yet not able to put it in words)
  • Can you rub my shoulder ? I hurts, think I pulled it. (Rub another one too as it's jealous :)) Hang on, let me take my shirt off. Oh man, it feels awesome, you should try it. (Oh man that was great, can I return the favor ? )


Ultimately one way or another you will have "the talk". If not now, then later. In my case, I moved to another country before I had "the talk". I crossed the ocean from US to Russia to have the talk. Thus it's never too late to have it, and I was happy I did. Even though in the end it meant that the guy was not interested, or at least was not ready for taking the relationship further. Or maybe he's not gay at all. But either way I realized that things are not going to go further in my case. That was a mountain off my shoulder.

In your case, it seems you are not ready for the talk. That is fine. But doesn't mean you can't have fun. I had LOADS !! of fun with my guy. Later we stopped. And we still have the Awesome great friendship between us every time I visit. Awesome !

Now go play or do something :)
 
Thanks guys for those last replies, they were mature and honest, ..|

I have thought about it strongly these couple of days, of telling him that im interested to have some fun, I just want to say it in such a way that, when he responds negatively, that I can quickly fix the situation, and keep the friendship. Luckilly this guy is very understanding and not easilly offended. Although he has a somewhat conservative upbringing. "Just try imagining asking a cowboy you want to play with him" :-)

you guys are absolutely correct in the fact that, merely an inoccent cuddle can mean much more than any sexual encounter. I can exept this fact and I agree, although I am very obcessed at wanting to see/touch his cock, and crindge to the fact that anybody else should touch it.

If only I can get past this. and like you guys said. The only way of getting this off my chest is by taking this risk of asking him. I just simply have to.


SO...

I thought about having a quiet talk about random things, maybe play a game of "Truth" while were having a drink alone. then trying to find out in an indirect manner how he feels about guys. ask him about past experiences. I would just like to make him secure in the fact that nobody will know and that its harmless fun between friends. Also i want to ask this indirectly so that I have something to fall apon should he react negatively.

I would very much appreciate it If you guys could help me come up with some lines I could use.
or ways of persuation. I just want to tell him as a "Straight" friend that I wouldnt mind some harmless fun.

Take into account:

- He is Presumably very straight or acting or Bi,
- He doesnt like to drink too much
- Hes quite protective over his cock, he wont walk around naked.

also. I want to tell him I love him in his face, after we say goodnite. (should I?)](*,)
 
First of all, there is no such thing as a straight farm boy. :badgrin:

Secondly, I'm not sure I believe any of this.

Finally, it's time to stop playing games and be forthright and honest with him. Tell him you are gay and very attracted to him. As much as you don't want to ruin a good friendship, do you really want to go on being as miserable as you are.
Maybe he is in the same turmoil as you.
If he can't handle the fact that you are gay and have feelings for him, wouldn't you rather know it now rather than another 6 months or a year from now? Put yourself out of your misery, dude. Stop beating around the bush and with any luck, you'll really be sleeping well tonight. :D

You're a man. It's time to take the farmboy by the horn.

Again, this presupposes your scenario is not all fantasy.

Picture this: you and he walking hand in hand through the corral, into the barn, up in the hayloft for some sweaty, naked
farmboy fun. You just know he's packing some serious beef.
He holds you in his arms with his hardness rubbing up your crack, while he kisses your neck and takes your tool in his hand. You feel his heat and desire and give in to his thrusting. After a dip in the stream out back, you can tell him how much you love him and plan a life together.

Now, get on with it! Unrequited love is a bitch.
 
First of all, don't say that you love him without having the talk. That'll just make him confused and upset. You don't want to scare him off now, do you?
 
The fact is, in all this time... in which you haven't really progressed any... farmboy hasn't made a move either.

It takes two to tango. You know that he's heavily invested in you emotionally. That doesn't make him gay. If he felt the same as you do, then he would have been looking for signs from you the same as you're doing with him. The intimacies would have gradually escalated until your two dicks closed the gap.

The flip side is, that if he isn't gay then he has no reason to think that you are any different than he is. He might feel deceived to learn that you had a sexual motive behind your friendship. If his friendship means anything to you, besides the hormonal stimulation, then you should tread very carefully to not lose that friendship when you come out to him.
 
Blewboi101 said:
Okay Okay, here goes

I saw him for a week on holiday, we spent a few days alone, just me and him. doing fun stuff a farmboy would do. we really had a great time and bonded very well as best friends.

Although I did everything in my path to look great, eg. get a great tan go to gym everyday, when I arived at his place I really looked my best. I walked infront of him many times with just my boxers on, looking really hot.

Iam sad to say we did not have any sexual encounters yet:cry: . Although I yet again slept next to him a few times! eventhough there were many open couches for him to sleep on. I just think he really trusts me on anouther level, lots of guys wont have towards their friends.

I just cant understand, why he hasnt made a move yet? Its funny, because so many girls throw themselves at him, yet he doesnt want sex from them. I dont know what he wants. all i know is he cares for me in a deeper level, we talk to each other every day. I even found a photo of me and him next to his bed. what is he saying?

many of you say go for it, its just not that easy. I cant just ruin this friendship for a few minutes of pleasure. I honestly dont know what to do:confused: this is tearing me appart emotionally, I desperately want this guy but I know I cant have him. I cant stop thinking of him.
Click to expand...

I've said it once and I'll say it again - get naked in front of him!! At least show him you're comfortable with the idea of him seeing more of you.

Criminy, this is frustrating!!

-d-
 
I went thru this with a straight guy for about 9 months. I thought I would have died waiting. It tore thru me so bad I finally told him how I felt----it didn't turn out, but at least I've moved on!

Reading this thread, I think I've already died twice....
 
Same advice as the other drawn out soap opera playing on another channel her.

Life can be incredibly short. In this case though, Carpe Mentula.
 
Same advice as the other drawn out soap opera playing on another channel here.

Life can be incredibly short. In this case though, Carpe Mentula.
 
staypuft said:
I am, however gonna agree with blackbeltninja and say that you need to flash somethin'. But it HAS TO BE BELIEVABLE. In other words: PRACTICAL. Perhaps after taking a shower, maybe walk around in your towel a little bit, show some of your skin (maybe a little wet, you know)
Click to expand...

Thanks very much. ..|

-d-
 
Hey Guys,

Back from my vacation. Spent allot of time with this guy. and have gathered enough info to know how its all gonna go.

I spoke to him, in depth about past experiences with guys. He made it clear that he has no interest whatsoever in guys sexually, " I mean for crying out loud, if a 22 year old hot guy that you know for a fact would like to play with your cock and sleeps next to you and you don't make a move, you MUST be real straight! not even curious." This is really hard for me. I just have to get over the sexual tension with this guy and start seeing him as a friend.

He still thinks im straight, although he definitely knows that i am curious, as i have made some pretty steamy suggestions as a "joke" (nothing too sexual "naked cuddling"), "he took with no offense". Only smiled with a naughty expression.

I definitely think that this homo erotic tension between us is what keeps this friendship interesting. And I think he likes it that way. I mean we talk twice a day. our relationship "be it only friends" is very very strong!(*8*)

I just have to get over thinking about him sexually, like most of my other straight friends for which I have no sexual attraction whatsoever.:confused:

How can I get over him sexually, yet still remain best friends?????:cry:
 
Blewboi101 said:
Hey Guys,

Back from my vacation. Spent allot of time with this guy. and have gathered enough info to know how its all gonna go.

I spoke to him, in depth about past experiences with guys. He made it clear that he has no interest whatsoever in guys sexually, " I mean for crying out loud, if a 22 year old hot guy that you know for a fact would like to play with your cock and sleeps next to you and you don't make a move, you MUST be real straight! not even curious." This is really hard for me. I just have to get over the sexual tension with this guy and start seeing him as a friend.

He still thinks im straight, although he definitely knows that i am curious, as i have made some pretty steamy suggestions as a "joke" (nothing too sexual "naked cuddling"), "he took with no offense". Only smiled with a naughty expression.

I definitely think that this homo erotic tension between us is what keeps this friendship interesting. And I think he likes it that way. I mean we talk twice a day. our relationship "be it only friends" is very very strong!(*8*)

I just have to get over thinking about him sexually, like most of my other straight friends for which I have no sexual attraction whatsoever.:confused:

How can I get over him sexually, yet still remain best friends?????:cry:
Click to expand...

I don't understand: if you told him about past experiences with guys, why does he still think you're straight?

As for him not being interested in guys sexually, well, based on his behaviour I'm guessing his in denial and for some reason has decided not to follow up on his flirting.

Now comes the harsh part. If you think perhaps he led you on (and I think he did) you need to confront him. Tell him how you feel about him and how you interpreted his actions. If he truly wants to be your friend he'll be understanding. Otherwise, the best way to get over him is to dump his ass.
 
Personally, I think you can have best of both worlds.

He may be straight, but that doesn't mean he isn't willing to play around. After all, you don't have to be gay to enjoy a handjob or a blowjob!

I think you should release your sexual tension with him through these bonding activities together. Ask him if he wants to try it, you know, take him up on his offer to do those slightly steamy things like the naked cuddling! He seems willing, and I think it can be a great friendship-building activity for the both of you. Just don't fall in love.
 
It is quite possible to fully enjoy a friend's physical sexuality without having sex with them. Frustrating! But, possible. #-o](*,)

All guys, even the absolutely straight ones, often develop some level of physical bonding in their closer relationships. It's just a matter of where "The Line" is drawn.

So ... how do you find out where each other's "Line" is? Well ... the idea is to keep pushing it a little further, and a little further, until you get a DEFINITE negative reaction. And when that happens how do you "recover"? That's when it's time to punch him in the shoulder, smile, and say, "Just kiddin', Man!"

If he's really a Friend ... you can still "keep" Him! But ... it's time to look for sex with someone else!

Keep smilin'!! :kiss:(*8*)
Chaz ;)
 
How very anti-climatic!

dr_beat said:
Now comes the harsh part. If you think perhaps he led you on (and I think he did) you need to confront him. Tell him how you feel about him and how you interpreted his actions. If he truly wants to be your friend he'll be understanding. Otherwise, the best way to get over him is to dump his ass.
Click to expand...
I agree with this entirely.

Yes your great friends, but at what (mental) cost?
 
LOL I have read this whole thread took about an hour yeah am so bored I was suspecting on page 2 that I would find him saying HEY GUYS BOTH OF US HAD SEX but it kept going like the energizer bunny listen sweetheart its obvious you to have a strong connection if it was me and I felt like he was the right one I would not have waited if I believe in something I just go for it but maybe you to are just distained to be just friends and thats precious but don't waste all your energy on this situation you to will always be close a bond with someone never goes away no matter what I wish you the best
 
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