Gaydar point system

[arpeggi]

I'm not exactly sure what makes owning a Saturn gay, and why it's the only American-made car worthy of acquiring points.

But it gave me 20.

 

[G-Lexington]

^ Claiming you scored less than 250 on this: +1000

1020. Totally gay.

Lex

 

[AverageJoe]

Normal Smile:
Huge smile showing full teeth: +30
Teeth are blindingly white: +10
Bad breath: -40
Asymmetrical smile: -20
Tongue piercing: +5

Eyes:
Plucked eyebrows: +15
Colored contacts: +20
Very thick, square glasses: +10
Wide open while talking/making facial expressions: +40

Clothes:
Vests (and under 30): +25
Way too tight: +20
Necklace or bracelet only: +0
Necklace & Bracelet: +15
Necklace & multiple bracelets: +50
Dirty: -15
Matching cell phone cover: +50
Old torn jeans: -20
New torn jeans: +30
Jeans w/ tear near crotch or ass: +50

Tattoos:
Only above nipple level: -5
Below nipple level: +15
Around belly button: +150

Body:
Very skinny (anorexic): +30
Muscular (not huge) arms: -20

At the gym:
Only does ab exercises: +20
Only does bench press: -10
Hits on women: -150

Drives:
Too fast: +5
Too slow: -10
A 4x4 truck: -5
A small, often yellow, 2x4, foreign truck: +20
A volkswagon: +10
A Beetle: +50
A motorcycle: -5
Anything cube shaped: +50
A stick shift: -5

Other:
Looks uncomfortable when others make gay jokes: +20
Objects when others make derogatory gay jokes: -30
Lectures people making derogatory gay jokes: +40
Slaps your butt while playing football: -1
Grabs your butt while playing football: +20
Grabs your butt any other time: +200

I'd give wearing dirty white tennis shoes a -50 Seems like every straight guy I know only owns ratty old white sneakers.

You could see my toes through my last pair of tennis shoes, and my new ones are already wrecked too. Pretty sure that's a -10 at most.

 

[Lube]

I'm not exactly sure what makes owning a Saturn gay, and why it's the only American-made car worthy of acquiring points.

But it gave me 20.

Gays (and lesbians) like to be different, unique. What was Saturn's original motto? "A different kind of company, a different kind of car." We also like special attention and the customer service emphasis (compared to other auto brands, anyway) and many of us don't like bargaining with dealers. Saturn fits that to a T.

Normal Smile:
Tongue piercing: +5

Eyes:
Plucked eyebrows: +15
Colored contacts: +20
Very thick, square glasses: +10
Wide open while talking/making facial expressions: +40

Clothes:
Vests (and under 30): +25
Way too tight: +20
Necklace or bracelet only: +0
Necklace & Bracelet: +15
Necklace & multiple bracelets: +50
Dirty: -15
Matching cell phone cover: +50
Old torn jeans: -20
New torn jeans: +30
Jeans w/ tear near crotch or ass: +50

Tattoos:
Only above nipple level: -5
Below nipple level: +15
Around belly button: +150

Body:
Very skinny (anorexic): +30
Muscular (not huge) arms: -20

At the gym:
Only does ab exercises: +20
Only does bench press: -10
Hits on women: -150

Drives:
Too fast: +5
Too slow: -10
A 4x4 truck: -5
A small, often yellow, 2x4, foreign truck: +20
A Volkswagen: +10
A Beetle: +50
A motorcycle: -5
Anything cube shaped: +50
A stick shift: -5

Other:
Looks uncomfortable when others make gay jokes: +20
Objects when others make derogatory gay jokes: -30
Lectures people making derogatory gay jokes: +40
Slaps your butt while playing football: -1
Grabs your butt while playing football: +20
Grabs your butt any other time: +200

Wow, you are very perceptive. I was literally laughing out loud at many of your points! Bravo!

 

[Ryuusei Boy]

I get +10 for playing video games, but I don't like comics

 

[trikky]

wears a white belt +30
wears a silver thumb ring +50
wears a silver ring on any finger but the married finger +30
Wears multiple silver rings +50
Has a small ring clip in upper ear +70
eyebrow piercing +50
uses lots of physical expressions when talking +40
uses eyes a lot when telling stories, like rolling eyes etc +50
wears black denims +20
calls his friends name like TJ or JD +60
drinks blue wkd or bicardi and coke (myfanwy) +100
has blonde highlights in hair + 50
has a white poodle as a pet +50
has a pink poodle as a pet +100
has a pekinese as a pet +500
has a rockweiler as a pet -500
wears abercrombie and fitch clothes +50
has a shoulder bag +50
has a girlfriend no one has ever seen and is vague on details +50
few guy friends +100

 

[Lube]

^Tee-hee!

Is buff and mean looking and really into leather and fetishes, and has a small white doggie: +100.
Is buff and mean looking and really into leather and fetishes, and has the best ceramics collection you've ever seen: +100.

 

[qget12]

Some of these seem pretty rediculous to be honest. It seems like basically anything can point to someone being gay. Or else the opposite means they're gay.

Talks about sports: -20
Talks way too much about sports to the exclusion of smalltalk: +20

I mean, Really?

 

[Lube]

Some of these seem pretty rediculous to be honest. It seems like basically anything can point to someone being gay. Or else the opposite means they're gay.

Talks about sports: -20
Talks way too much about sports to the exclusion of smalltalk: +20

I mean, Really?

Yes, very definitely yes.

As Shakespeare said (more eloquently than I did) about someone overcompensating (as in the sports talk):

The lady doth protest too much, methinks.

 

[AverageJoe]

Some of these seem pretty rediculous to be honest. It seems like basically anything can point to someone being gay. Or else the opposite means they're gay.

Talks about sports: -20
Talks way too much about sports to the exclusion of smalltalk: +20

I mean, Really?

That's what makes it so fun. Besides, it just goes to show that stereotypes don't always hold.

 

[andyrew123]

Haha, went through all the serious ones and got 765.

Oops.

 

[Toy-Boy]

Superiority complex +100

 

[Lube]

Has a set of fine china: 0
Has 3 books on Chinese porcelain: +50
Knows what Chinese export porcelain is: +200

 

[AverageJoe]

Has a set of fine china: 0
Has 3 books on Chinese porcelain: +50
Knows what Chinese export porcelain is: +200

Has plastic dinnerware stolen from local restaurants and calls it fine china: -20

 

[TX-Beau]

Calls anything "fine china" +20

Has three thousand plastic cups from Burger King value meals, two actual forks (one bent,) a bunch of plastic take out sporks, no plates but lots of pizza boxes, and nothing but Budweiser in the Fridge - 200

 

[giftart]

sits on the couch whole day - 75

 

[G-Lexington]

>>>Has three thousand plastic cups from Burger King value meals, two actual forks (one bent,) a bunch of plastic take out sporks, no plates but lots of pizza boxes, and nothing but Budweiser in the Fridge - 200

Nope, that means he's trying to hard to project the image that he's straight. No straight guy works that hard. + 1000.

>>>Some of these seem pretty rediculous to be honest. It seems like basically anything can point to someone being gay. Or else the opposite means they're gay.

Has problems with point system - +10,000.

Lex

 

[AngelFromAbove]

>>>Has three thousand plastic cups from Burger King value meals, two actual forks (one bent,) a bunch of plastic take out sporks, no plates but lots of pizza boxes, and nothing but Budweiser in the Fridge - 200

Nope, that means he's trying to hard to project the image that he's straight. No straight guy works that hard. + 1000.

>>>Some of these seem pretty rediculous to be honest. It seems like basically anything can point to someone being gay. Or else the opposite means they're gay.

Has problems with point system - +10,000.

Lex

Lube would be proud of Lex. You have truly learned the ways of Lube.

 

[G-Lexington]

I think we all have a lot to learn from Lube.

Lex

 

[Lube]

I think we all have a lot to learn from Lube.

Lex

That's what JUB is all about--we all have a lot to learn from each others' experiences.

I didn't come down from a mountain with a tablet inscribed with what I know.