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Have you ever just flat out asked a guy if he was curious about men?

Yeah, but it was not because I wanted the guy. Somehow, I get the feeling he'll have a miserable marriage in the future, unfortunately.
 
The guy I want to ask, I only see him very briefly like once every two weeks. I'm never alone with him to really ask.

I'm thinking about sending him a text message. Does that sound lame? In some ways I think it's lame but other ways might be easier.

Kinda scary and exciting at the same time but more than likey the guy is straight?

What do you guys think?
 
My first reaction to your question was to pretend to be Carried Prejean and say "you're being inappropriate." But then I recalled that in university I had a crush on this guy in my class, Ben. I did some "research" and found out that he wasn't dating anyone and frankly did not seem all that interested in girls. One night in the pub I managed to get him alone at a table and I asked him whether he would go out with a guy. He told me he was straight. He was perfectly friendly about it and as far as I know he never told anyone about it. But I felt rather foolish.
 
PabloZed said:
My first reaction to your question was to pretend to be Carried Prejean and say "you're being inappropriate." But then I recalled that in university I had a crush on this guy in my class, Ben. I did some "research" and found out that he wasn't dating anyone and frankly did not seem all that interested in girls. One night in the pub I managed to get him alone at a table and I asked him whether he would go out with a guy. He told me he was straight. He was perfectly friendly about it and as far as I know he never told anyone about it. But I felt rather foolish.
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After he told you he was straight, and then silence for quite a while ?
If so, it would be a very awkward silence.
 
Sultan said:
Made out? Hmm.... that's a pretty bold thing to admit.

I have a feeling you could get him if you wanted to.

Anyway, some of the replies make me want to ask this particular guy even more. :p
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I don't know about that...The Dude Briohazard text ADMITTED to making out with other guys and even flirted about "sexuality" before that...If the co-worker was Physically attracted to BrioHazard then he would have left the door open..He closed the door all the way..

There has to be a "stopping" point before a person appears to be desperate....There's nothing left to do or say in their situation..They just need to remain co-workers...
 
Of course, ALL THE TIME!!! And usually, they are indeed straight, so I thank them for sustaining the human race.
 
Sultan said:
What do you guys think?
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Just ask him to hang out. See how it goes from there. Anything but a movie, you can't talk in a movie (Well, you could, it would just be very rude.).

MisterMajestic said:
I don't know about that...The Dude Briohazard text ADMITTED to making out with other guys and even flirted about "sexuality" before that...If the co-worker was Physically attracted to BrioHazard then he would have left the door open..He closed the door all the way..

There has to be a "stopping" point before a person appears to be desperate....There's nothing left to do or say in their situation..They just need to remain co-workers...
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A friend/co-worker of ours threw a Halloween party the Sunday before Halloween. The guy I mentioned in my previous post was there and had had a couple of drinks. We got to talking and I some how found my way in a three-way make out session with him and my friend (a fellow female friend/co-worker) in one of the back rooms. After the make-out session, he asked me to ask my friend we had just made out with if she would like to have a threesome with him and I.
I asked her and she declined saying she tasted smoke on his breath and that was a turn off. So I told him she wasn't up for it.

A week later I got a text from my friend (the girl) telling me she just saw that guy at work and found herself very attracted to him, and that she would like to go ahead with the threesome. I texted the guy asking him if he was still up for the threesome. He said he would have to think about it because he's more prone to doing things like a threesome when he's had a couple of drinks.
He called me a few days later declining the invitation for the threesome, saying it'd be to weird for him and that he doesn't want to ruin our friendship; He was very nice and apologetic about it.


So I have to agree with you, Majestic. I'll remain friends/co-workers with him; unless he indicates or shows any interest in getting with me.
 
Skip said:
I believe it would be a lot more awkward seeing him the next time after a text message, if it gets odd.
That's just me.
I think the outcome would be a lot better if the person could kinda feel your emotions instead of having to guess through text.

I'm not saying emotions as in being in love or sad or some shit, i'm just saying it in terms of how you express yourself, it's harder through texts to read people..
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Yup you're right. Text message probably isn't the way to go so I should probably just wait and see if the opportunity comes up.
 
Does this guy know you're bisexual? If he does, you could just say:
"Well, you know, I've got a silly, small, little thing about you, it's nothing, really...."
His response and body language will tell you volumes. Does he start avoiding you?
If he doesn't know you're bisexual, then you could say something like:
"I don't know, sometimes in my life I get these little things for guys, not big, just silly stuff, really...."
Again, watch how he responds and reacts.
Does he respond aggressively and accusingly? Or jokingly and playfully?
Do you see him more or less from then on? Does he make excuses to see you, or excuses not to see you?
I know that the difficult part is bringing the topic up. Bring up women in general as a starter.

I think that gentle, dismissive hints, followed by close observation of his reaction in the coming weeks, will tell you a lot about how he feels towards you.

P.S. This is all theoretical, but it's the approach I would use myself.
 
Telstra said:
After he told you he was straight, and then silence for quite a while ?
If so, it would be a very awkward silence.
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There was probably a pause, but then we just moved on. If it had been really embarrassing or if he had yelled "fag" I would remember it (I remember all the bad shit that happens). What I most remember is that I was pissed at this female classmate who had assured me he was gay and that is the only reason I felt comfortable asking him.

There is of course the very real possibility that he was gay, closeted, and not ready to come out.

Interestingly, the tables were turned on me the next year. I was friends with this really hot guy and I began to let my feelings get in the way of our friendship. So one day he asked, "are you gay?" Of course I tried to dodge the question and the best I could come to the truth was saying, "I could be bi." Well he told me emphatically that he was straight. Our friendship became very strained and I was totally at fault, which is why I advise guys to avoid mistaking frienship for something more. If there were ever a guy who was too friendly and loving to be straight but was indeed straight it was Andy, who is now happily married with children.
 
I never have, but my ex did. That's how we started seeing each other. I was a little surprised by how direct he was, but it didn't bother me.
 
I never have but have come close a few times with guys i was suspicious of.
 
nafhoosier said:
Then just do it and get it over with.

End of discussion.
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We all know that's the best solution, especially in the long run.

But when it comes right down to it, and you're basically paralyzed cause this dude takes your breath away(yes that happened to me the other day....), it almost never works out that way for a lot of us.

Plus, sometimes you run the risk of getting your ass kicked. Or you don't wanna ruin a friendship or a good work relationship.

I'm not trying to be rude. That really is the best answer!

But some of us have issues that keep us from just putting it out there, and we don't always know why.
 
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