To register, turn off your VPN; you can re-enable the VPN after registration. You must maintain an active email address on your account: disposable email addresses cannot be used to register.
) came near the end when ivoryy confessed that he's already posted about his situation and sought advice elsewhere... I can't help but wonder if JNY's harshness wasn't, at least partially, in response to that admission. Indeed, the fact that ivoryy's already been given advice to seek help but is still in the same situation is almost as troubling as ivoryy's own assessment that advice to 'get help' us not what he thinks he needs but rather advice to 'give in'...and:
These guys are right.
Hi ivorry. Contrary to popular belief you are NEVER too young to start learning the lifestyle. But learning and engaging in it are two very different things.
The reason why there aren't so many young slaves and why the community isn't as big as it used to be is because of AIDS. Aids killed so many people who were involved in the community and new guard sort of came around for some reason.
Which says that a slave is a bitch and property to a master, that a slave has to be shave completely, the slave cannot contact anyone, and just stupid and fantasy rules.
The whole thing about the Master/slave lifestyle as well as the leather lifestyle (No not the whole look at me I look so cute in my leather thing) is Respect, Honor, Trust, and Love.
There is a difference between BDSM and Leather and Master/slave lifestyles though.
Master/slave is a relationship. Somewhat like a dom sub relationship. Leather can be as well. BDSM. Is sex. It's not a relationship. It's a scene. There can be scenes in the lifestyle but scenes do not make up the lifestyle.
And as for his friends doing kinky things to you. You need to get out of there. Just because a Sir puts a collar around your neck. Whether it be training, a chain, a hello kitty collar or whatever it does not make you his. And just because you sign a contract doesn't mean you can't leave.
Yes it's true that I am a slave and I belong to a Sir and I have signed a contract. It's not so much about the validity of the contract. It's about the symbolism of it. You should only sign the contract when you are ready. And the way it's SUPPOSED to work is the master or dom is supposed to make the contract for you and YOU get to look over it and question anything that is in there, make some changes, or suggest something that you want removed or added. And then once it's finalized than you sign it.
Like some other people have stated it is unclear what you want.
There are resources to learn about the lifestyle. There might even be a social group in your area.
But this is not the way. I have had bad experiences with Sir's at well. And Sir's who I considered to be my master.
Some of them said, "Oh for us stop means stop". "NO put the blindfold on it will be fun"
I've talked to a so called Sir before who tells me he wants to interview me as his potential slave but how I can't talk to the ones who are helping me learn about the lifestyle, I can't talk to my parents, I have to cut off all communication, and how I have to make a decision NOW!
Those are red flags if there ever were any.
A dom should not make you feel trapped. A dom should not cut off your connections to the outside world. There is a very sadistic reason why a dom would want you to do that. A dom should not push you around and make you do everything they say. Even as a slave you still have a voice and you still have right.
For example. With my Sir in our contract it's stated that although Sir's word is final I can still express any concerns I have. A good Sir will not want to do anything that potentially causes his slave harm. Be that mentally or physically. Safewords are only good if they are respected as well.
You need to be EXTREMLY careful with doms who want a feminine boy. I have been called feminine before but that's not who I am. The reason I say this is because some of those doms are very warped. There are some really dangerous people out there and it's not smart to give yourself away after you just turned 18, without looking into the person at all, or the lifestyle.
When you are considering a dom you also want to ASK FOR REFERENCES. If he refuses to give you some than that is a warning sign. Doms who respect the lifestyle and understand it will give you references and allow you to contact those people.
I am wondering about how you moved in with this man and your parents not knowing about it. But I don't think I should dwelve into that.
The point is this isn't the lifestyle. I don't know what you are looking for. But this is fantasy. This type of dom has the mindset of keeping a bitch sub slave and locking them in a cage, letting their friends rape him, changing his appearance, and doing whatever they want with him and not caring what the sub bitch boi thinks.
This is not what old guard or the lifestyle is about and a slave is not a bitch. A slave is actually a very strong person. But unfortunately there are some bastards out there who know how to break a person and how to completely dehumanize them and take any potential or dreams they ever had and just completely crush them.
Do not let this man do it to you.
Even though you need to get out you do need to be careful.
You said he leaves you alone sometimes. You should call that help line number and talk to someone. You need to take into careful consideration about what advice they tell you though. I say this because there are doms out there who will not let you leave and keep you trapped or worse. But it seems like right now you do have a window of opportunity. Will you still have what communication you have TAKE ADVANTAGE OF IT!
And then base your decision about whether to leave or not or how to leave on everything you have heard. Maybe this is what you want. There are some guys out here who would love to do this. Regardless of what you want. This is not the lifestyle and what leather and Master/slave is about. Just know that. Oh and that guy isn't a master.
You can put on a pair of checker pants and a white coat and call yourself a chef. You can put on white pants and a jacket and a stethoscope and call yourself a doctor. It doesn't make it true though.
Good luck. And feel free to PM me if you want to talk more.
I also know a woman who is a counselor for people curious about the lifestyle or who are in the lifestyle and have questions about it. She actually spoke at a Masters and Slaves meeting a while back.
But whatever you do find the resources, numbers, or places that you can that can help you. Good luck
