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I have a black dog that I want to get rid of

BenF

BenF

Vodka and mouthwash
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I am looking to get rid of my black dog. I have had it for a few years now and I am sick of it.

If anyone knows how to train it to be less irritating, if anyone knows any kennels that I can dump it in for a while, or if anyone knows a decent way just to fucking well kill it, let me know.

Advice greatly appreciated.
 
Aww... poor puppy! I miss having a dog.

There has to be a shelter of some sort that you can leave him at? Hopefully one which does not kill?
 
I'll be watching this thread with interest. I've had a huge black dog following me about for years, and invading my life when I least want it. I've been able to chase it away a few times, but I've never managed to get rid of it completely. The ghastly fucker is lurking around at this very moment. Hope you can find a way to get away from yours Ben.
 
*Hoody* said:
I'll be watching this thread with interest. I've had a huge black dog following me about for years, and invading my life when I least want it. I've been able to chase it away a few times, but I've never managed to get rid of it completely. The ghastly fucker is lurking around at this very moment. Hope you can find a way to get away from yours Ben.
Click to expand...

Since September I thought I had seen the last of it, I had managed to carry on without it blocking my path.

Last week, I stood in one it's turds that it had left on my doorstep and I knew it was back.

It follows me everywhere. It's at home with me, it turns up at work with me, it follows me into the bedroom, it even wakes me up in the middle of the night. Some nights I can't sleep because of it's incessant barking, growling and howling.

I have tried drowning it, drugging it, smoking it out, hiding from it and shouting at it.

I have tried to palm it off on people close to me - using fair means and foul, but nobody wants it.

So if anybody wants this black dog, they are welcome to it.
 
oh no... I think you both have The Grim!

[queues up funeral march on the iTunes...]

it was nice knowing you guys... :(
 
Does it look like the one on this weathervane?

Pennacolo.gif


If so, it belongs to the church in Bungay. It's been missing since 1577, so I'm sure they'll be only too glad to have it back.
 
BenF46 said:
...If anyone knows how to train it to be less irritating, if anyone knows any kennels that I can dump it in for a while... Advice greatly appreciated.
Click to expand...
If you get an answer, let me know. I can pass on the info to lots more people [strike]here[/strike] I know. :badgrin:
 
Mother Teresa's clinic in Calcutta is searching for medical staff who are prepared to work some 12/14 hours daily, without pay. The contract is for 12 months, renewable at the volunteer's request. A simple bed and healthy food are provided, as part of the reward. The full reward is always realised when we note that our black dog has chosen to stop following us and our own health and well being begin to reveal an appreciation for life, that Prozac and family could never provide.

It is reported that those who have volunteered for a year or two and then returned to civilisation healed of their ailments, have been known to view their predictable daily frustrations in a different light. Certainly they are no longer afflicted by the menace, of out of control black dogs.
 
Ben,

Am sorry to hear the old black dog is back. Don't know what you left out to encourage him to return, but do hope you find it and dispose of it properly.

Kallipolis had a good remedy, but you do work that is appreciated and respected now, though I'm sure that appreciation and respect is well voiced.

best wishes,
 
Is "black dog" a metaphore for something or SOMEONE else? Or are you seriously just pissed off with your dog and want rid? If so then I have a very hungry cat that will eat almost any type of meat as long as it's ground down into a pulp.
 
You referring to the dog you've had for YEARS as an "it" just shows who you are. You're a disgrace. A cold, ugly disgrace.
 
I think to even raise the subject of possibly killing an animal because you are tired of it, even in jest, demonstrates a serious lapse in judgement and sensitivity.

I think you owe everyone, including the dog, a sincere apology.
 
Depressing though the thought may be, the thoughtful thinker will always seek to look beyond that which peeks the interest of those who fail to note that dogs are not always seen, but often experienced for their depressing periods.
 
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