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I lied about my age! Please help!

dont joke around like its no big deal at all. dont treat it like some terrible, dark secret, either.

just tell him. tell him that you really like him, which is why you want to come clean, and apologize.

there is a chance that he doesnt take it well, but it sure as hell isnt going to get better the longer you wait.

good luck!
 
I think you should show him this thread, you explain it really well and you might mess it up when you try to explain it in person. I'm sure he'll be fine with it, you weren't trying to be be deceitful, you just weren't expecting anything more than a casual hookup so put in random details. Do this sooner rather than later though and good luck, you sound like a nice genuine guy ..|

And when it comes to random sex hookups it's not always a great idea to start giving out loads of personal info straight away like who you live with, who your friends are, who you know. So I think he should be understanding.
 
hi locksmithers,

I agree with all others that you should tell him this as soon as possible. Many people over here have already given you a large variety of advice how to do it, which words you need to use, etc. Up to you to pick the one you think is the best. Good luck and I really hope you will be able to built up a nice friendship with him. Please keep us informed.

Take care & best wishes.
 
1. He knows you are not 19.

2. Come clean about it and ask for forgiveness. If he is not capable of forgiveness,
he is not capable of love, either.
 
"I want you to know that I'm 24. I know Ben and I live with my brother. I thought this was just going to be a hook up or two but now that we're hitting it off I want you to know the real me."
 
AFTERMATH:

It was Monday morning and I texted him at 10:00 am, tempted to just text him the truth. But he replied later than expected, which allowed me to think rationally.

I asked him if he wanted to go do one, two, or all of these things: restaurant, movie, or walking. But in the end, he just ended up going to my room again, which was preferred actually. As soon as he came in, I sat him down and told him the truth:

"Hey, where do you see us going? (he answered, then) Well, before we continue on, I just want to say I lied to you about a few things. First, I'm really 24, not 17. Second, I don't have roommates. I live with my brother. And third, I've met your best friend before and gave him a handjob at the movie theater."

Surprisingly, he took it well. He even expressed relief that I was older, as opposed to being younger. After, we watched a bunch of YouTube videos, then we ended up cuddling in bed, which led to him going under the sheets, which led to him asking me to fuck him.

He fell asleep right after, and slept through the night. He left at 6 am. He hasn't texted since, but I have faith that he will.

P.S.: It was strange though that he didn't make the initiative to kiss anymore.
 
Good to hear from you locksmithers!

I believe it is a good sign that he took it well and stayed with you. If he lost interest, he could have just left and said something along the lines of "thanks, but no thanks."

I wouldn't look into the kissing thing too much, it was only one evening.

All in all, I'm glad everything has worked out so far. Honesty is the best policy in the end, and this is another case of that. Good luck and remember to be upfront with him. If he knows anything about being good to someone, he'll treat you the same way and be upfront with you!

..|
 
AFTERMATH:

It was Monday morning and I texted him at 10:00 am, tempted to just text him the truth. But he replied later than expected, which allowed me to think rationally.

I asked him if he wanted to go do one, two, or all of these things: restaurant, movie, or walking. But in the end, he just ended up going to my room again, which was preferred actually. As soon as he came in, I sat him down and told him the truth:

"Hey, where do you see us going? (he answered, then) Well, before we continue on, I just want to say I lied to you about a few things. First, I'm really 24, not 17. Second, I don't have roommates. I live with my brother. And third, I've met your best friend before and gave him a handjob at the movie theater."

Surprisingly, he took it well. He even expressed relief that I was older, as opposed to being younger. After, we watched a bunch of YouTube videos, then we ended up cuddling in bed, which led to him going under the sheets, which led to him asking me to fuck him.

He fell asleep right after, and slept through the night. He left at 6 am. He hasn't texted since, but I have faith that he will.

P.S.: It was strange though that he didn't make the initiative to kiss anymore.

Glad to see that it went so well for you. :) And I think he didn't take the initiative anymore because he now knows that you're older. Initially, maybe he felt like he "needed" to make the first move, or be the aggressor since he thought he was older (and that you're younger, more naive, lack experience, etc). Now he probably just doesn't feel as compelled to take the initiative. :)
 
I will be the rain on this parade, but only to point out a potential possibility:

Many guys take this type of stuff with delay. When they are WITH the other dude, they are kinda accepting it, going with the flow. But when they are finally alone, they start thinking about it from a different angle, and suddenly decide differently.

I know all I'm doing is adding anxiety, I just want to prepare you, so that you're not wondering WTF if he suddenly pulls away. But I DON'T THINK HE WILL. If he took it well initially, he most likely didn't have a problem with it. And either way, it was the right thing to do, not just morally, but in order for this thing to have a chance to develop :)
 
Good that you are honest in the end. The future can only be uncertain henceforth, after all, it is his call if he still wants to be with you. Hopefully he can see that you came clean and pursue the thing.

With regards to the kissing, maybe it's because he felt that since you are older than him, that you should start making the moves? ;)

*hugs*
 
You said you asked him "hey, where do you see us going?", but I didn't see that you mentioned what his response was. I'm wondering if he "didn't make the initiative to kiss anymore" because you've now been with each other many times and he's perhaps afraid that feelings for each other may come into play...after all, he's the kind of guy that likes CL hookups. He may be afraid you are getting attached and doesn't want to lead you on (?)...idk. Kissing is considered, by many, to be more intimate than screwing.
 
You said you asked him "hey, where do you see us going?", but I didn't see that you mentioned what his response was. I'm wondering if he "didn't make the initiative to kiss anymore" because you've now been with each other many times and he's perhaps afraid that feelings for each other may come into play...after all, he's the kind of guy that likes CL hookups. He may be afraid you are getting attached and doesn't want to lead you on (?)...idk. Kissing is considered, by many, to be more intimate than screwing.

I never understood that intimacy thing, but I guess it is easier to treat someone else like a human fleshjack if you aren't actually making out with him at the time. I see your point.
 
If you let it, this can turn out to be a positive turning point in the relationship.
 
Ok so you told him. You came clean. The ball really is in his court, now. To be honest he can't really get that bent out of shape about a possible "NTA quickie" ad respondent from CL taking a few liberties with the truth.

The thing is now just keep it real. Lying is such a chore after a while.
 
AFTERMATH:

It was Monday morning and I texted him at 10:00 am, tempted to just text him the truth. But he replied later than expected, which allowed me to think rationally.

I asked him if he wanted to go do one, two, or all of these things: restaurant, movie, or walking. But in the end, he just ended up going to my room again, which was preferred actually. As soon as he came in, I sat him down and told him the truth:

"Hey, where do you see us going? (he answered, then) Well, before we continue on, I just want to say I lied to you about a few things. First, I'm really 24, not 17. Second, I don't have roommates. I live with my brother. And third, I've met your best friend before and gave him a handjob at the movie theater."

Surprisingly, he took it well. He even expressed relief that I was older, as opposed to being younger. After, we watched a bunch of YouTube videos, then we ended up cuddling in bed, which led to him going under the sheets, which led to him asking me to fuck him.

He fell asleep right after, and slept through the night. He left at 6 am. He hasn't texted since, but I have faith that he will.

P.S.: It was strange though that he didn't make the initiative to kiss anymore.

Have you heard anymore from him ? If not I think you can just regard it as the hook up you were looking for :)
 
Thinking about this, the biggest problem isn't the lie about being 24 instead of 17, but the lie about what you do now.

Most guys wouldn't really care too much over just a few years but what you do, school, education, college, job stuff must have come up in the conversation and if you've created some fake alternative teen high school drama lifestyle thing, well, I don't know, that's creepy and depending on how far you went into it may have been a deal breaker... Hmmm... But good luck xx ..|
 
Sorry, that was a typo. I meant to put "19", not 17.

Anyway, since my revelation, we've seen each other 3x now. He even came over Valentine's Day and gave me chocolates, I gave him flowers.

Where is this going? I don't know. We never see each other outside my bedroom. We have a good time every time he comes over. He told his friends and mom about me. Last night he said "I told my mom about you. She asked me if I wanted to date you and I said if my heart feels right I will." He does invite me from time to time to hang out at his place but I'm just too busy with school.

On Saturday, we agreed to meet up. But at the last minute, he canceled on me. So we met up last night (Sunday) instead. But then tonight, my drag queen friend texted me and said, "Your bf (he's teasing me) won a trip to Las Vegas?!" I didn't know about this because my guy didn't tell me anything about it. It kind of hurt and I can't help it, but at the same time, maybe he just forgot, or maybe I shouldn't feel entitled to find out about every single development in his life.

We cuddle all night every time he comes over, but no we never kiss. Is that weird?
 
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