I'm getting fucked by this hot dude. He has 3 kids. Should I feel like a whore???

[RyanKilter]

I can see what you mean by feeling a bit sleazy. how old are the kids? Old enough to really care? If it bothers you much maybe do your deeds during their week at moms, and the next week work on the nonsexual aspects of a relationship. Really, how far beyond sex does it go at this point?

For his side though, just imagine how hard it must be, probably still a baby in his sexuallity, and on top of that he's got kids whic would make any new relationship hard.

 

[HourglassGuy]

Okay I hope you guys leave as many comments as possible on my situation because I have no idea what to do with this. I love you JUBBERS please help me out!

Okay, I met this guy at the club last week. This man is incredibly gorgeous! He's way taller than me (I'm 5'10"), has a goatee, very well toned body yum yum! So throughout the night he offers to buy me some drinks (duh! of course!) and towards the end of the night he asks for my number (again, duh! of course!).

We text & chat on the phone for a few days. I learn he just turned 31 in February (he doesn't look like it at all, plus I'm 22 so I don't think the age is a big deal.....) and he works for our local hockey team (I didn't even know Wichita had a hockey team LOL but for some reason this makes me want him even more (???)). We talk in detail about our sexual pasts and whatnot. He tells me he's actually bi. I thought he was just a masculine acting gay dude so I immediately ask him if he has a gf which he says he just broke up with some chick.

So last Saturday I go over his house and it's completely empty. (This fact is important for later.....). He takes me to his room and (sorry to be so in detail but....) he fucks the shit out of me and it's amazing! Best sex I've ever had. We make out for what seems like hours (he has a tongue ring OMG hot!) we give each other head (again-he has a tongue ring OMG hot hot!) and wow the night goes by in a flash and I'm completely out of breath. Best. Sex. Ever.

So on Monday we planned on what time for me to come over for round two of our sex-apalooza fuck fest and he tells me since it's a Monday I'd better stop by sometime after 9pm. I go, ok why??? He tells me that's usually when his kids are asleep.

**********xyboyms's jaw drops to the FUCKING floor*****************

He never told me on the phone that first time. The thought had never crossed his mind???

I go, really?? I had no idea. You never told me. He says he never really thought about it. They're from his ex-wife whom he divorced about 5 years ago. He has three (oldest girl, another girl, and the boy). They alternate every week on who gets them during the week and then the weekend.

I guess the night I came over she had them because, like I said, the house was dark and empty. Trust me if I'd have seen a toy or a bottle lying around I would be going what the fuck dude?? do you have kids or something??

Apparently, he says I shouldn't care what day I want to come over. If they're home he says I should have no bother about stopping by (!!!) He says I'll only come by when they're asleep and upstairs (two story house; he lives downstairs).

So I made up some excuse why I couldn't stop by on Tuesday and all this week we've just been texting each other. I feel weird. I feel weird and icky. He's not married. No girlfriend. Just kids. He says they'll be asleep whenever I'm there, but still..........what if they knock on daddy's door or something??? What if I bump into one of them on my way to the door after getting fucked hardcore by their daddy??

Again, guys, the sex was fucking amazing and I want some more. The guy is gorgeous and the sex is amazing. I want to see him again and the sex is amazing. I just don't want the extra baggage (that sounds horrible but whatev).

Thoughts??????

I'm not sure what to tell you in that situation, because personally, I don't see anything wrong with fucking someone just because they have kids. Do whatever is right for you -- whatever your gut tells you to do.

Meanwhile, the description of your "best sex ever" sounds H-O-T. I recently made out with someone with a tongue ring (for the first time, believe it or not) and yeah... H-O-T.

 

[RyanKilter]

btw... I happen to have a thing for Dilfs. Last I was seeing a guy who has a little girl, she was never a big problem. I just accepted her as another aspect of HIS life and we worked things out as they came.

 

[interesting]

^ Hey Joshua_me, you're from Sarasota? I live in Bradenton!!!

Anyway, topic at hand. Personally coming from a 19 year-old guy (since you're only 22, not much different) I say go for it since he might not cross your path again; besides, they're his kids, he has an obligation to be a father, not chastified himself from experiences.

 

[star-warrior]

Like you said, he's now divorced, and the kids are a fact. The only issue I have is does your sex disturb the kids's sleep. Remember children in the house when gay sex is being had can be a precursor to many different unsubstiated and detestable accusations by ugly gossip mongers.

 

[springboksfan]

xyb, it sounds like you should give the guy a chance. He's probably asking you to come over after the kids have gone to bed so that he doesn't introduce them to you, let them get attached and then have you split and the kids suffer emotionally. I think that's the way it should be in the beginning of relationships (especially if they're just sex based at this point). Make sure Daddy's bedroom door is locked before you go to town and all should be well!

BTW - Go Thunder!!

 

[Kulindahr]

You *must* be kidding, 3nips....

It has *everything* to do with everything.

I'm preaching to the choir here, I know...But when guys want to 'bust one',
they'll do what ever it takes to do so.

Mmmk, I have to tell a story of a similar thing that happened to me:
(Gather 'round, boys)

I met this guy online once, I was horny and he was hot and well, before I knew it I was at his apartment...at 4am one Sat night. God, he was everything I wanted in a man...toned, hairy chested but with that 'boyish' look that always drives me wild.

This went on for a couple of weeks until I noticed some odd things about his place....It didn't look like anyone lived there...it looked like a furnished apt. that had never been lived in....a couch, two chairs and a coffee table.

No food in the kitchen, no mail, no TV, nothing that you would expect to see.

Well, it slowly dawned on me thru my hormone filled haze that this was just a 'fuck place', a 'love shack' if you will that he had rented with the expressed purpose of bringing 'home' guys like me, and then sending them on their cum-covered way.

I was torn. The sex was earth-shattering, but ya know how after you cum suddenly things don't seem all that great ? That was the vibe I was getting.

I told him I needed a couple of weeks off to think things over, and during that time...lo and behold, I tune on the local news and THERE he is, being profiled as the championship winner of the girls soccer team. See, his two daughters were on the team, and his wife was SO proud of him, and he was 'Joe Hetero', coach of the year, and every one's hero.

Well, that was quite the wake up call for me.

Here was this guy that was being celebrated for having his perfect wife and daughters and his white picket fence and dog...while meanwhile he had his 'homo love nest' set up across town

I decided right then and there that I didn't want any part of it, and never saw him again.

The point of all this is that you *deserve* someone that can give themselves to you completely, and not just when they need to 'bust one'.

There are plenty of guys out there that fill that bill perfectly, and it's my opinion that deep down you know this.

Don't sell yourself short...And spare yourself the heartache.

Um, that has nothing at all to do with xyboyms' situation. You had a cheating, hiding, hypocritical SOB on your hands; he has a single, dedicated father who is honest about it and has taken precautions, apparently, for the protection of his kids.

 

[Joshua_me]

Um, that has nothing at all to do with xyboyms' situation. You had a cheating, hiding, hypocritical SOB on your hands; he has a single, dedicated father who is honest about it and has taken precautions, apparently, for the protection of his kids.

I disagree.

'A single, dedicated Father' who turns out to be gay has two things on his mind:

His children, and his dick.

Whichever order that turns out to be is irrelevant.

He and the mother of his children will be, whether they like it or not, connected by their children for at least the next 20 years...and then some.

"protection of his kids" .... please.

I'm not judging anyone here, really I'm not...But if I had kids to raise I assure that would be one of the first things I brought up in the conversation.

Not some 'jaw-dropping' bomb I'd drop after we were washing the sheets.

 

[HourglassGuy]

I'm not judging anyone here, really I'm not...But if I had kids to raise I assure that would be one of the first things I brought up in the conversation.

Not some 'jaw-dropping' bomb I'd drop after we were washing the sheets.

I think it depends on the context of the evening, though. I don't need to know your whole life story if we're just hooking up for some hot ass. It wouldn't make any difference to me because if it's a 'sex only' thing anyway, chances are pretty slim that we'll get serious enough for your kids to make a difference one way or another, anyway.

If we're on an actual "date" date though, getting to know one another? Yeah, then I'd expect to be told.

 

[slobone]

I say go with the "flow". He's the one who has to figure out where the kids fit in, not you. You only have to worry about what happens if they see you naked when you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night like Jo Beth Williams in Kramer vs. Kramer. Oh but wait, they're upstairs. I assume you use the downstairs bathroom.

You also might consider inviting him over to your place some time when he doesn't have child care duties.

 

[NineOfClubs]

Listen to Kulindahr, he usually knows best.

Really, just go for it.

Don't listen to the usual JUB prudes and prigs who so often come out to condemn anything even slightly out of their own experience....

 

[sparky95]

I say give him a chance! The kids may well be used to Daddy dating guys and have less issues than you! Have fun!

 

[Prince Harry]

As I read through there is not personality or whatsoever but it was a great sex and you want some more, it is not a 'potential' relationship having kids involved bothering you, it is more 'having sex' with possibilities that kids would knock the door bothering you?

So, just let him know your thoughts and arrange the 'safest' time so you can relax and enjoy your next session.

 

[cocktales]

What's the definition of a whore anyway? lol

You must be feeling guilty of something; otherwise, why the thread to see what the JUBBERS think?

YOU are the other woman in this man's marriage and YOU may/can be the one that destroys his family....

I'm NOT saying whether what you're doing is right or wrong; but why must you have sex with this guy, knowing that there is probably NO future for the both of you..........just raw passion and sex!

Is that enough to keep you going and making your life complete? Don't you wish that you two could have parties, go to parties as a couple and NOT be afraid that you will be caught?

I'm sure, even though the sex is Out-Of-This-World, that you would give anything to have him exclusively........ALL yours!

So? NO, I am NOT goin to say STOP living a lie, for just getting your rocks off (both of you) and then goin your separate ways.......him to his family and you home alone....

Is that enough for you?

 

[rareboy]

If he's a good father, then i say he might be a keeper! You sound a little immature to handle the situation; obviously it is just the sex you're after.

 

[Chino05]

nothing wrong just go for it, as long as you both agree no strings!!!!

 

[khushibagh]

It sounds to me like you're not ready to date a man with kids. If things work out with this guy, the kids are going to be a part of your life as well and that can be scary (or great). I am assuming the kids are probably between 5-12 and you didn't say whether they have been told that their dad is gay. I agree it could be weird if you ran into them in the morning, especially if they don't know yet. My advice is to see this guy again when the kids aren't around and ask him where he sees a boyfriend fitting in in this situation and decide if the answer works for you. I mean if he sees you sneaking in and out of the house in the wee hours so that he can get his rocks off, I'd get out; if he tells you his ex-wife and kids are cool with him dating guys and he hopes that in time you and the kids will all be friends then this might work out.

 

[Candyapple]

YOU are the other woman in this man's marriage and YOU may/can be the one that destroys his family....

So? NO, I am NOT goin to say STOP living a lie, for just getting your rocks off (both of you) and then goin your separate ways.......him to his family and you home alone....

Ummm, the guy divorced his wife 5 years ago, according to the original post. He's just broken up with his gf and is single and available!

 

[ahotjock71]

I disagree.

'A single, dedicated Father' who turns out to be gay has two things on his mind:

His children, and his dick.

Whichever order that turns out to be is irrelevant.

He and the mother of his children will be, whether they like it or not, connected by their children for at least the next 20 years...and then some.

"protection of his kids" .... please.

I'm not judging anyone here, really I'm not...But if I had kids to raise I assure that would be one of the first things I brought up in the conversation.

Not some 'jaw-dropping' bomb I'd drop after we were washing the sheets.

I would take issue with several things with this man.

First, He didn't tell you in all the conversation he had with you that he had kids. Any father worth his salt is going to talk about his kids right off the bat.

Second, I would question his maturity, having a tounge ring at 31? 19 or so, yeah, but 31???

Third, if he is on staff with a major sports team, get ready for alot of dodging & weaving, and don't expect him to take you out in public, unless it's a gay bar.

If it's just sex, and that's all, then do what you have to do, and don't worry about his family life, just see him when the kids are not around. But if you want more, and you deserve more, and better, then drop this guy & find a real boyfriend.

I'm also impressed at the fortitude of your moral character to question the situation, rather than do what most would do, and that's use the situation for their advantage & get their nut, etc.

Good luck, my dear!

 

[Aussieguy01]

Do what you think is right. Do you see you two getting together in the future as a couple? or just sex partners? think of the long term. Why do you feel like a whore though? is that just because he has kids?.

But i think you should do what works for you , what makes you comfortable and happy, let us know what happens.